Luke Kornet's Mysterious Double Life Revealed

EXCLUSIVE: LUKE KORNET’S SHOCKING SECRET LIFE—CELTICS BIG MAN’S 'VANISHING ACT' LEAVES TEAMMATES STUNNED!

By Chip Buckets, Tabloid Sports Insider

BOSTON— He’s the 7-foot-2 Celtics center known for his 'Kornet Kontest' and goofy bench celebrations, but insiders say Luke Kornet is hiding a bizarre double life that’s left teammates questioning everything they know about the gentle giant!

MYSTERY MAN?

Sources close to the Celtics locker room reveal that Kornet has been disappearing for hours without explanation—only to return with no memory of where he’s been!

'One minute he’s stretching, the next—poof—gone!' a shocked teammate whispered. 'We’ve checked the training room, the cafeteria, even the parking lot. Nothing. Then he just… reappears, holding a cup of coffee like nothing happened.'

THE 'KORNET KULT'?

Even stranger, multiple witnesses claim to have seen Kornet muttering to himself in what sounds like ancient Lithuanian—despite the Vanderbilt grad having no known ties to the country!

'I caught him in the hallway just staring at a janitor’s mop bucket,' said a TD Garden staffer. 'He whispered ‘Jūra grįžta’—which means ‘The sea returns’—then walked away. Chills.'

COACH’S SUSPICIONS

Joe Mazzulla, when asked about Kornet’s erratic behavior, reportedly smirked and said, 'Luke’s a unique guy. Let’s just say I’ve seen things… unexplainable things.'

Is Kornet a time traveler? A secret agent? Or does he have a twin no one knows about?

One thing’s for sure: The Celtics’ favorite goofball might be the NBA’s biggest enigma!

STAY TUNED—THIS STORY IS FAR FROM OVER!

(Got a tip on Kornet’s secret life? DM us @TabloidHoops—discretion guaranteed!)

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