Young Frot

Young Frot
Creative Activities for the Young at Art
Dedicated to the Young at Art, Artful Kids was established in 2008 to celebrate children's art & creativity. Founded on a playful approach to art activities, over the years the focus has changed a little, but the blog remains a place to explore and share projects, news, reviews, and creative ‘finds’ for both children and the ‘young at art’
One of the things I most love about art is its sensual qualities. Art can be many things, but for me it’s the visual and tactile elements of art that I especially enjoy, and which I think are also particularly fun for children to explore. I’ve always had a particular attraction to texture especially – as an art student, I spent a lot of time seeking out ruined dilapidated buildings to paint because of the wonderful subtle colour combinations and textures you found there – not to mention their evocative atmosphere.
A great way to achieve texture on paint is by using the technique of ‘frottage’. This is basically the term given to pressing a textured material onto wet paint, and removing it to leave its texture behind. In many ways it is the opposite of printing, because instead of using something to apply the paint, you are applying something to selectively remove it. Items such as bubble wrap, lace and hessian, all work well for this, but my absolute all time favourite material to use with frottage is cling film. To achieve the effect below, I painted some paper with yellow acrylic and allowed it to dry. I then painted over it with a more diluted pink, and immediately laid cling film over the surface. Allow the film to wrinkle and crease however you like, as it is this that creates the texture. Allow to dry, then remove the cling film. The overall effect is I think rather like marbling.
You can also try frottage with natural materials. We’ve tried it with different leaves and flowers, again, painting a sheet of paper with a single colour, allowing it to dry, and then painting over with a second, more diluted darker colour. As before, while the paint is still wet, we applied textured leaves, grasses, flowers etc. We found daisies and dandelions (of which we have rather a lot at present on our lawn) worked quite well.
Of course this is an activity which can double up with printing. Having used an object for Frottage, it will be covered with paint, so you can then use the same item to print with! Two activities for the price of one!
Dedicated to the Young at Art, Artful Kids was established in 2008 to celebrate children's art & creativity. Founded on a playful approach to art activities, over the years the focus has changed a little, but the blog remains a place to explore and share projects, news, reviews, and creative ‘finds’ for both children and the ‘young at art’
All images and text are copyright of Artful Kids. Please do not re-publish images and text without my permission. However you may use a small extract of text and a single image as long as credit and a link back to the source page is given.
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By
Cary Tennis

Published August 30, 2011 12:20AM (EDT)

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Love And Sex
Since You Asked

Several months ago, I took a trip with a longtime, close friend. We are both gay men and have traveled many times together over the years with few problems and a hell of a lot of fun. My friend can be high-maintenance but I am pretty low-key and we've managed to work out our different styles and to enjoy ourselves.

We have shared many rooms together over the years, but this time our housing arrangement required us to share a bed, which did not give me a moment of pause. Like many gay men, our platonic friendship began with a roll in the hay. That first time was something of a quirk for both of us, fueled by too much drinking and ecstasy. We are not each other's types at all. I should also mention that I have boyfriend and my friend is married, but neither of our partners came with us on this trip.

It was very early in the morning of our first full day of vacation when I woke up to feel him pressed up against me. I had already told him that I need my space when I sleep, so without rolling over I asked him to move, which he did with a snort of impatience. I went back to sleep but awoke some time later when he started to moan. I assumed he was a having a nightmare and decided to wait for a bit to let it pass before I woke him. It lasted only a few seconds. It did cross my mind that the noise he was making was also very similar to an ejaculation, but I instantly dismissed the idea.

Later that morning as we had breakfast with our housemates, I asked him if he'd had a nightmare. He said he didn't, but I wondered if he'd simply forgotten and gave it no more thought.

The next morning, I awoke again. I don't remember what woke me, but it was alarming enough for me to rise up and check my surroundings. There was no mistaking it this time -- he was looking at me while he masturbated. Stunned and confused, I plopped back down on the bed, ignored a brief caress and went back to sleep. (I can sleep through anything.)

Hours later, the implications of what happened suddenly occurred to me. Both times he must have shaken me awake, and I was incredulous that he thought it appropriate to interrupt my sleep just because he was horny. I can understand waking a spouse or a romantic partner for sex, but not a platonic friend. I also became angry when I realized that he had given me no choice in the matter -- at least I was awake for our 30-minute fling from years before. This time I was simply parachuted into a situation I didn't expect or want, and I had no say or control over what was happening. I was struck by how self-centered it was.

Needless to say, the rest of the week I slept on the sofa. Several times, he asked why I was sleeping in the living room, but always in front of others. Since our housemates have to count pennies for a trip like this, I did not want to create tension for them, and invented excuses. But I also began to suspect that my friend was manipulating the situation, forcing me to lie in front of others in order to create an "official" version of events that let him off the hook. In any case, we never discussed what happened.

His behavior also gave me new insight into the falling-out he had with a mutual friend several years ago, while we vacationed in the same resort town. They had been sharing a bed, and I noted that our other friend had begun to sleep on the sofa, too. They had an angry fight one night on that trip and they've never spoken to each other again.

I was deeply depressed and upset. I rarely left our vacation house and I began to see my friend in a new light. While I normally overlook his tendency to orchestrate plans, I became increasingly irritated and angry at the way he expected everyone else to conform to his schedule. He also takes great delight in discussing the shortcomings of mutual friends, and more than once I had to bite my tongue while he regaled others with his disdain for certain people. The behavior became more pronounced as the days went by, and the final morning he was so thoroughly obnoxious I could barely look at or speak to him during our plane ride back.

After we returned home, I decided I needed some space. For several weeks we had no contact and I kept up with him only through his posts on Facebook. I saw all of these in a new light as well, and became angry at the dishonesty -- he made several claims I knew firsthand to be untrue, and all of them seemed tailored to lead to a bitchy remark that would end his post with a flourish.

And then about a month later his mother died.

She had become seriously ill only a few months before, and they were very close. I was sorry for his pain -- I vividly recall the unbelievable shock at losing my father even though I knew he was dying for almost three years. He had very little time to adjust to the imminent loss of his mother, so I'm sure his pain was severe. I sent him a note to acknowledge his grief and he replied with a polite thank-you.

Through Facebook, I know the ceremony of his mother's death lasted for a while -- culminating in a huge funeral about two weeks after she died. While all of this took place hundreds of miles from where we live, I would have participated in most of it had it not been for his outrageous behavior. As it was, my simple note and his reply was the only contact we had during this time.

It saddens me that the timing of these events means that our friendship has been irrevocably torn and I have begun to second-guess my response. I don't think of myself as the kind of person who would disappear when a close friend is experiencing enormous pain. My boyfriend says I did the right thing, that the timing of events is irrelevant and that my response was appropriate. But I would dearly love another opinion.

It sounds like this ended in the way one would expect. What he did caused your friendship to cool. You were hurt and outraged. So you backed off. And then, as can be expected, the unexpected happened. His mother died. You still had conflicted feelings. On the one hand, you had compassion for him. On the other hand, because of things he had done and things you had observed, you didn't feel that previous fervor for your friendship that might have driven you into action, to be there by his side enthusiastically.
This all sounds reasonable. When we are hurt we back off.
When someone asks if their behavior was "right" I hesitate, because I think, within certain limits, in our social arrangements, it is right for us to behave according to how we feel. Feeling is a great regulator of human behavior; we behave well toward others partly out of our own goodness and partly out of self-interest because we want their feelings toward us to be full and kind, in part so that when there is a death in the family they will show up at our side.
So we try to refrain from behavior that will outrage them and hurt them and disgrace us. But this is not easy. If we are still growing emotionally, if we are self-centered and immature, then we are likely to do things that will outrage and hurt our friends. We will definitely learn some hard lessons along the way. We will find that for some people, enough is enough. We will find certain doors are closed to us, and this will come as a shock. It may be that your friend is learning such things now.
But human worthiness runs along a continuum. I consider myself to be a deeply flawed person, and I identify with those whose character flaws have led them into grave troubles, whose momentary impulses have caused lasting harm.
He is not perfect but that doesn't mean you can't be friends -- that is, if you still want to be friends.
You may feel a desire to punish your friend. It's natural when we have been injured to want to lash out. But I think the best course is to spend some time with him and try to reach a new understanding that contains a further frankness. What has gone between you requires you, in fact, to find a further frankness. The casual arrangements you have made in the past are no longer enough to encompass what you now know.
I suggest you meet with him and have a frank talk. You might begin by saying that you care deeply about him but there are some things he has done that you find hard to accept. Maybe he can tell you something about what's been going on in his life, things that he has not mentioned, things that don't make him look good, things that will help you understand why he did the things he did.
Maybe you can be the one to elicit the darker truth. Think about it. His mother was dying. He was lonely. He was scared. You don't have to become his therapist to suggest that he be frank with you about the emotional needs that are driving his behavior. Maybe his marriage is unsatisfying. Maybe he feels people don't respect him. Maybe he's trying too hard.
Maybe you will find it in you to forgive his shortcomings. Or maybe not. Either way is OK to me. That is, what I prize in people is the ability to be who they are. For some people, these breaches would be so severe that they would have to end the friendship. Others might find it possible to overlook them. That is a personal matter.
I may be too liberal in my view of human conduct but I have done some fairly awful things in my time, and yet many of my friends stuck with me, and I appreciate that. I wish the same fortune for you and your friend.
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All Anthony Martinez wanted was a guy to take him to prom. What he got was an over-the-top “promposal” from his best friend Jacob Lescenski, who is straight. Inspired by their friendship, Teen Vogue joins these BFFs as they get ready for their big night out.
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It says You're hella gay, I'm hella straight,
but you're like my brother, so be my date.
[Anthony Recording] Are you serious?
I've decided that asking Anthony would be something that
and he always talks about how badly
he wants a guy to take him to dances.
Jacob is straight and I'm gay, and that's okay.
[Jacob] We're gonna get fitted for our tuxes.
[Anthony] For our prom tomorrow. Yeah, it's
I am excited because there are three different
shades of blue and blue is my favorite color ever.
About two years now, he joined student council
of sophomore year and I had been in student council
We'd always go to each other whenever something happened
and I guess we just became best friends
Wow, these both look so good on you guys.
[Woman] Not sure about that tie with it.
We've been best friends for two years now.
[Anthony] Today is prom and right now we're at set up
and we're getting ready for the big day at the same time.
Our school district is very tolerant
it's just not acceptable to talk about people
so gay, straight, you know, whatever.
this story is so amazing is because
They didn't think it was a big deal,
where the rest of the world is saying you are so brave.
They really truly didn't even get it.
To see my kids really bring about some changes just,
For some people it's just really hard to grasp onto.
Now that the future's like turning around,
It makes me happy knowing that I am comfortable enough
And he's not even gay, he's straight.
'cause if you would've told me that at eleven years old,
I would've told you you're lying to me.
I know, so much fun. I'm excited for tonight.
He has a lot of energy, always as since he was little.
I couldn't have asked for a better child. He's perfect.
He is in student council. He's in NHS.
His senior year, he will be president of the high school.
Couldn't ask for a better grandson.
Oh my gosh, overwhelming. Just a joy.
This is a cake that Anthony's aunt bought him.
the saying that I wanted on the cake was
You're gay, he's straight. You're going to prom.
You couldn't have had a better date.
But they would not put that on a cake
It takes a lot for Jacob to, you know,
step up to that plate and being a straight man
He was all caught off, like I'm sure
This is Jacob and I when we were really little.
I was kind of like a fat baby but he was really fat.
And this is Jacob in his like Hawaiian little shirt.
He was really into golf, and this is him when he was little.
And then these are all like his little like
This is the one from this year when the promposal happened.
I was a little surprised because he didn't tell us.
Actually, the first time I heard about it was on Instagram.
And I told Jacob, I said that you could've just asked him
but you went out of your way to make sure that Anthony
was asked the way everyone else gets asked.
He's always been that way, always likes to help people.
I was actually in tears, just because
how some of the people, just random people
[Jacob's Dad] From all over the world
Okay wait, you guys should do Pitch Perfect.
Alright? You guys are really good at that.
like I wouldn't even wanted any of the cameras
I was just thankful to go to a dance
It's just not normal for a straight guy
I mean, I expected people to say this is different,
And that's what we're trying to prove.
I said well I'm stubborn and I wanted to go with a guy
and I wanted to show that it's okay to go with a guy,
and he didn't have to be gay and he didn't have to date me
and I didn't exactly say I want a straight guy to ask me.
I just wanted a guy, and he did that.
You guys can subscribe to the Teen Vogue YouTube channel
Starring : Jacob Lescenski, Anthony Martinez
Music// Songspub
Song: Wait 4 Me, Artist: Castaneda
Song: Electrify, Artist: Clementine & the Galaxy
Song: Cecilia, Artist: Andrew McMahon
Song: You and I, Artist: People People
Song: Magic Show, Artist: Electric Owls
Song: What We Do Together, Artist: Undergreen
Song: Hello Hello, Artist: Oona

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