Women Wearing Butt Plugs

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Women Wearing Butt Plugs
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Butt plugs may seem pretty risqué, but a lot of women swear by them as a source of pleasure.
Of course, even if you are intrigued, chances are you're not going to run out and buy a toy for booty play without knowing what you're getting yourself into. Right?
So we asked experts what the hell these are for, why some people think they're ahhhmazing, and how to use one.
Similar to your c-spot and G-spot, there are tons of ultra-sensitive nerve endings in your back door, says relationship coach Cory Honickman, PsyD . That means stimulating it can bring you of a ton of sexual pleasure whether you're playing with yourself or with a partner. And, depending on how the plug is used, the female skene glands (also known as the female prostate) may be stimulated, which can be a pleasant surprise, she says.
Besides reaching erogenous zones you didn't know you had, these toys can also be used as a form of kink , says Honickman. More specifically, people use them with domination and submission play. Using butt plugs can be a way for someone who enjoys submission to explore feeling vulnerable or humiliated in a way that gives them pleasure, says Honickman. "Women who have experienced anal orgasms say it’s a very deep and powerful sensation,” she says.
Another reason people use butt plugs is to prepare the rectum for anal play , she says. And that's an important step if you're looking to work up to something bigger, like a penis or larger sex toys , says Honickman. “Using a butt plug gets the rectum primed for something to enter it," she says. "That ups your chances of having more pleasure and less pain during anal play."
Learn about the fascinating history of the sex toy:
Of course, like with anything you're trying for the first time, you shouldn't jump in full force. Be prepared. “Don’t wait until the heat of the moment to get lubes, condoms, etc., lined up before the action commences,” warns Kat Van Kirk , Ph.D., certified sex therapist and resident expert at adamandeve.com . (You can always buy both condoms and lube from the Women's Health Boutique.)
For starters, make sure you're very aroused before even getting close to inserting a butt plug, says Honickman. This can make the sensation less jarring and more of a turn on.
Next, take your time. Whether you're using one with a partner or by yourself, inserting a butt plug too fast can actually hurt. Start by using fingers (make sure your fingernails are trimmed) first to get used to the sensation. And make sure you're using lots of lube from the start, says Van Kirk. Taking these steps will help ensure that you don't get anal micro-abrasions, which can increase pain and potentially cause an infection, she says. When you feel ready, insert the toy very slowly into your rectum.
Once it's in, you can choose your own adventure, says Van Kirk. 
Though some women do pull it in and out (as you would with a sex toy made for your vagina), the plugs are designed to create a sensation of fullness in your rectum, says Van Kirk. Other options include leaving it in for "double penetration" during masturbation, vaginal intercourse, mutual masturbation, or oral sex, she says. Also, Van Kirk says that some women enjoy the sensation so much they wear them while not having sex. To each their own sexual adventure.
Van Kirk also suggests quickly removing the plug during an orgasm for an added sensation. But feel free to experiment with whatever feels right to you. 
A few safety precautions to keep in mind: "Always play with an anal plug with a flared base or string so that you can easily retrieve it when play is done," says Van Kirk. Also, never insert a toy or fingers into the vagina after anal play without washing it first, she says. Otherwise, you may introduce bacteria to the vagina and get an infection. "
For first timers: This very affordable toy is under $6, which is great if you're not sure if anal play is something you're into yet. Plus, the jeweled base keeps the toy from wandering too far up your backdoor and makes it easy to remove.
Akstore Small Super Steel Fetish Plug Anal Butt Personal Sex Massager, $5.99, amazon.com
For advanced users: This set of four plugs allows you to work your way up in size, which can be fun for someone who's definitely into the booty stuff. 
LinkS Silicone Butt Plug, 4 Piece Anal Trainer, $13.69, amazon.com


Thoughts I Had While Wearing a Butt Plug for the First Time For anyone who’s curious about what a butt plug feels like for the first time.
Thoughts I Had While Wearing a Butt Plug for the First Time
Thoughts I Had While Wearing a Butt Plug for the First Time
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Butt plugs may not sound glamorous to some.
My ass is on my brain because my lover has requested I arrive to his place with the butt plug he purchased for me already inside me. I don’t mind the request, it’s kind of our thing. He’s the dom, I’m the sub. But this is much different than the “garter belt and heels” requests of the past. Not only that, I have to be there at six, which means I have exactly 10 minutes to get to his place if I want to stay on schedule.
I have no idea how to actually put a butt plug on (in?). I’m running out of time and who knows how long it takes to watch a freakin’ butt plug tutorial. Come to think of it, who knows where to even find a butt plug tutorial?! I know I could Google it but, ugh, do I really want to see the results of ‘Quickest way to put on a butt plug’? 
Oh wait! This thing comes with instructions! Beautiful, beautiful, search history-less instructions in seven languages (Did you know “butt plug” in Dutch is “butt plug”?)! Okay, something about a 45 degree angle (Geometry?!) and using lube. “I have lube!” I shout to no one. ‍
I stick my finger ever so slightly in my asshole and immediately start having flashbacks. Not “finger in butt” flashbacks, but flashbacks of my, yes, more than one trip to the gynecologist with tampons stuck inside me. I know this is a different hole, a different time. But still, I worry. 
Wow. It’s in! That was easier than expected. I’m still breathing, and hey! I can walk! And kick! I’m like a kinky Sally O’Malley ! 
Uh-oh. I forgot to walk the dog. Shit. No. Don’t say that word! Darn. If I walk the dog, I will officially be running (waddling?) late. He’s giving me the eyes, poor thing. I have to.
Thank God, all he had to do was pee real quick. My sweet angel pup gets me and my tardy ass. I reward him with treats. 
When I signed the lease to my apartment, I felt blessed with a .2 mile walk to the subway. But suddenly these four minutes walking to the train feel like a hike. It’s not that I physically feel the butt plug inside me but mentally it is screaming. I remember to relax my face.
Okay. I’m officially on the train. Whew! Although, do I sit? Stand? I’ll sit. Slowly. 
I’m holding a magazine although I haven’t read a word for three stops. I wish I paid more attention in the dozen yoga classes I’ve been to. Knowing how to properly breathe would be good right about now. Is it through the nose out the mouth or the other way around? 
I feel like I’ve been sitting too long. I sit up straighter. Even though my lover can’t see me, I pretend he’s watching. I think I’m smiling too much. Reign it in, Carolyn. Nothing to see here, people. Just your average Sunday evening commuter...who is starting to feel warm. No, hot . How can you tell the difference between summer heat or butt plug heat? Shit. No! Darn! What if it’s like some sort of butt-Toxic-Shock-Syndrome-thing? The weather app says it’s 86 degrees out. Summer heat. 
We’re off the train. We’re off the train. Butt plug and I are apparently a unit now. We’re connected, we’re attached, we’re...about to fart. Is that allowed? Of all the days to drink a pot of coffee and eat broccoli. Always self-sabotaging, Carolyn! No, stop! I can’t be negative. Negative is... clenchy. Positive thoughts only. Note to future self: Next time, I’m asking for a full, 12-hour notice before butt plug requests.
The walk from the train to his apartment is usually my favorite part of the night. It’s just long enough to listen to a sexy song so I arrive wet and aroused. But I’m deciding against my usual routine tonight because it just hit me that I’m wearing a dress with no underwear. If I’m too wet, will it slip out? I should probably have a game plan if it does. What if it falls out as I’m crossing the street? I guess I’d pick it up, right? No, no, better idea. Kick it. Yes! That’s what I’d do. Leave the butt plug, save yourself. 
Green light. Time to walk. One two. One two. If the butt plug falls, kick with your shoe . Hey! It rhymes!
I’m finally at his building. The desk attendant is looking at me funny. I look down expecting to see the butt plug at my ankles but it’s still snug. 
My first elevator ride wearing a butt plug! I almost take a selfie. Come on. Live in the moment! 
Before heading to his door, I check the mirror in the lobby. Ah. Just the perfect amount of perspiration on my face. I do a spin. Mainly because I’m finally able to relax, but also to air out the stress of my walk. I let out a sigh even a yogi would be proud of. I knock, let out a laugh and wait.
The door opens. “You’re in trouble.” he says. I’m late. I feign my regrets as he feigns his anger. We’re both good at our roles. He turns me around and lifts my dress ready to “punish” me when…aha! He sees it.
I may be late, but I obeyed his request by wearing the butt plug. He is pleased and I once again feel like a good girl. Time to play.
My first butt plug commute may not have had me thermometer breaking, mercury blasting, bombs exploding turned on, but it certainly had its payoffs. Once I was able to relax, the sensation of being “filled” felt good. It was like wearing an outfit that made me feel good, made me feel sexy. No mirror or external validation necessary. I may have been wearing the butt plug to serve someone else’s kink, but it became my kink as well. It’s important to understand the kinks that work for you. And if you plan on experimenting with butt plugs, find the size that works for you too. I’m glad I started with a beginner BP. Frankly, I’m glad I started with one at all. My ass was something I avoided simply because of location. Sexy on the outside but exploring the inside felt like a step I wasn’t ready for until I was. I’m glad I did what felt right, when it felt right. ‍
Carolyn Busa is a writer/comedian living in Brooklyn, NY. Her goal is to make you laugh and make you blush. Read her blog www.mysexproject.com or follow her on Twitter and Instagram @misstoiletslave.

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Carina Hsieh
Sex & Relationships Editor
Carina Hsieh lives in NYC with her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once called her the Samantha Jones of Tinder • She enjoys hanging out in the candle aisle of TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals. 

Taylor Andrews
Taylor is one of the sex and relationship editors who can tell you exactly which vibrators are worth the splurge , why you’re still dreaming about your ex, and tips on how to have the best sex of your life (including what word you should spell with your hips during cowgirl sex )—oh, and you can follow her on Instagram here .

Emma Glassman-Hughes
Emma Glassman-Hughes (she/her) is a freelance writer for Cosmopolitan and a part-time editor at the Boston Globe.


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"Once you experience an orgasm with one in, you never want to have an orgasm without one."
Let’s get this out of the way fast: Anal sex isn’t as scary as it seems . All the horror stories about the pain or the…ahem…potential byproducts (yes, sometimes poop comes out) are typically borne of faulty prep and faulty practice. But with the right method—and the right toys!— anal play might just become your new favorite bedroom activity, unlocking new levels of pleasure along the way. Step one? The butt plug .
Butt plugs are sex toys that anyone with an anus, regardless of genitalia or orientation, can use during partner play or solo masturbation . Butt plugs do pretty much exactly what their name suggests: They plug up your butt. If you’ve never experimented with anal play before, you may be wondering why anyone would want to plug their butt. To be fair, it sounds kinda silly. But a butt plug provides anal penetration that stays in place while you pleasure yourself elsewhere, heightening sensation and contributing to stronger orgasms. Who’s silly now?!
Sex and pleasure educator Luna Matatas says the sphincter area has a ton of nerve endings, and anal penetration can be pleasurable and stimulating for any kind of body—especially women and those who were assigned female at birth (AFAB) . “Women and AFAB folks benefit from butt plug stimulation of those nerve endings because it can increase arousal in the nearby erogenous areas like the perineum and vulva,” she explains. “Depending on the shape and size of the butt plug, it can also help maximize hot spots for vaginal penetration by pushing against the back wall of the vagina through the rectum.”
If you have an interest in trying anal sex with a penis or a dildo , Matatas says a butt plug is a great way to “train” your anus for penetration. “Your anal sphincters and tissue need to be trained with gradual penetration or you increase your risk for anal fissures and injury,” she says. “Using butt plugs helps you get to know how your booty reacts to penetration, gets you familiar with what angles or sensations feel good or not, and allows your anus to relax and open.”
But even just with a butt plug, there’s still a good deal of prep work that should be done. San Francisco–based sex expert and therapist Celeste Hirschman , MA, co-founder of the Somatica Method of sex, says it’s necessary to clean your butt plug thoroughly before and after use, in accordance with the toy’s instructions. Also, before inserting the butt plug, you or a partner should warm up the anus with plenty of external stimulation, whether it’s with a finger or a tongue. “Analingus is really good, gentle, and relaxing,” she says, and perfect for getting you in the mood.
To avoid any unwanted surprises, some people douche beforehand. But Matatas warns against this. “Douching with solutions can cause irritation and dry out the delicate anal tissue,” she says. “If you want to flush yourself out, use a small enema bulb and flush it out with warm water over the toilet beforehand. You can also just shower after your last bowel movement. However you feel comfortable.”
Ultimately, Hirschman says, this is anal play we’re talking about here. It’s not going to be perfectly clean, and that’s okay. “Sh*t happens,” she says. “If you’re playing in that area, you have to be ready for that. It’s good to have a conversation [with your partner] like, ‘If this happens, we’re gonna laugh about it and we’re gonna clean the sheets and then we’re gonna move on.’ There has to be a relaxed attitude about that for people to feel comfortable.”
Otherwise, Matatas and Hirschman agree: The most important health and safety tip is to keep butt stuff and vagina stuff completely separate. Toys made for vaginas often don’t have bases, which means they can get stuck inside your body if inserted into the anus. And if you use anal toys in your vagina, you risk contracting a UTI or yeast infection .
Overall, Hirschman says, the thought of anal play may appeal to some women, but one or two bad experiences can easily scare them off. She says even if it’s not that common for women to use butt plugs (only 32 percent of Cosmo readers report using a butt plug despite 82 percent saying they enjoy anal stimulation), the benefits, when done right, are worth the effort.
“There’s a joke among sex therapists that women have anal sex only once,” she says with a laugh. “That’s because sometimes it hurts, but that’s usually because people don’t do it well. So even the ones who are more experimental and who might want to try having something in their ass, they might end up having pain and then avoiding it after that.”
“There’s a lot of anxiety about the butt,” she adds. But if you do it well, anal play can be a life-changing experience.
Read on to hear from eight women about why they love their butt plugs and why you just might, too.

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