Taboo Head
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Taboo Head
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When is a Pat on the Head Taboo?
Business Etiquette
Recently, Estrin Education received a communication from a reader expressing her discomfort when a coworker pats the head of a client’s child.
Our increasingly global society yields many benefits, one of which can be a greater understanding and appreciation for other cultures and customs. But what happens if a custom from your culture is prohibited in another? For many people, it can be surprising to learn that a behavior they associate with warmth and affection is considered rude and/or taboo in another culture.
Such is the case of the practice of head touching in Western culture. Many westerners fondly remember grandma, grandpa or even the friendly stranger affectionately patting our head or tousling our hair. Perhaps we’ve done it ourselves and reached out to touch the head of someone’s adorably cute child, an act that is meant – and seen – as a sign of approval or even love. So for many of us, myself included, it is quite surprising to learn that touching the head of another person can be a sign of bad manners in Asian cultures. In many Asian cultures (especially those in the Southeast) the head is a sacred body part as it is believed that the soul resides in the head. Random head touching just isn’t done.
Even I will admit that trying to remember the different customs of other cultures can sometimes feel overwhelming, but this one is easy. Regardless of your cultural beliefs, it is inappropriate to touch the head of a client’s child. Period.
Common business courtesy dictates that the children of clients be treated as you would treat the client – if the child is old enough to shake hands, greet the child and extend your hand to shake. If the child shakes your hand, fine. If the child declines, don’t force it, and don’t touch any other body part, including the head. Presumably, the child’s parent is in the office to work with you and there is no issue if the child doesn’t want to interact with you. Think about it, would you pat the head of an adult client? I certainly hope not!
Legal professionals, do you have a pressing business etiquette question? Then ask Stayce!
By Stayce Wagner, Spencer Crane Etiquette, LLC/All rights reserved
Originally published in KNOW, The Magazine for Paralegals
Stayce Wagner is a certified Corporate Etiquette and International Protocol Consultant trained by The Protocol School of Washington®, the only accredited institution of its kind in the USA.
Stayce Wagner
Founder & CEO
Spencer Crane Etiquette, LLC
Tel: (877) 542-8787
© 2022 Spencer Crane Etiquette, LLC All Rights Reserved.
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Taboo, alternatively called tabu, tapu or Tongan. It is a prohibition of social actions based on false beliefs that performing such actions is either too scared , or too dangerous for the human race. Disregarding taboo is generally considered a deviant act by the society. Taboo is putting a person or a thing under temporary or permanent prohibition, especially as a social custom.
There are different theories of approaches to this concept. The religious approach focuses on taboo derived from belief in spirit and inspired by the awe of supernatural. The cultural taboo demands prohibition of various cultural laws which are forbidden in different cultures. The food and drink taboo demands prohibition of various food and drinks by the society. The power of it lies primarily in the emotional forces they exude. Even the thought of violating a taboo triggers a punishment.
Religious, social, cultural taboo is practiced in every part of the world.For example, The practice of Sati was a taboo.
In Tanzania , customary marine tenure takes the form of restrictions of fishers on the fishing grounds and guarding. Fourteen forms of taboos and beliefs that inadvertently protect fish stocks and consequently protect fishing habitats have been identified in Tanzania. They are:-
It is something in a particular religion which the religion considers forbidden.
In many religions in India, marrying outside your religion is considered unsacred and is frowned upon. Also, during the first four days of menstrual cycle, a woman is considered impure and is not even allowed to enter temples. Menstrual blood is considered to be impure and girls are not supposed to enter kitchen also.
The consumption of alcohol is a major sin or “haraam’’ in Islam. Homosexuality in Islam is a big sin and is a crime under Islamic law. According to Sharia, homosexuality is a vile form of fornication punishable by death.
According to Jewish dietary law found in the Torah, all food must be kosher. A Jew must only marry a Jew. Violation of such practices be it marrying a non-Jew would be considered a violation of Halakah and taboo.
There is a number of cultural taboos prevailing in and around the world. A list of them is given below,
Food and drink taboo is a restriction on consumption of various kinds of food and drink. Examples:-
Hence, these are few of the plethoras of taboos that exist in our society. These are age-old practices which are still being practiced in the society. However, a lot has been eradicated but a lot more needs to be abolished.
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