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N.S. Gill is a Latinist, writer, and teacher of ancient history and Latin. She has been featured by NPR and National Geographic for her ancient history expertise.

Gill, N.S. "Male Sexuality in Ancient Rome." ThoughtCo, Feb. 16, 2021, thoughtco.com/standard-roman-sexuality-112735.
Gill, N.S. (2021, February 16). Male Sexuality in Ancient Rome. Retrieved from https://www.thoughtco.com/standard-roman-sexuality-112735
Gill, N.S. "Male Sexuality in Ancient Rome." ThoughtCo. https://www.thoughtco.com/standard-roman-sexuality-112735 (accessed August 21, 2022).

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Our modern preoccupation with sexuality has depended on a distinction between homo- and hetero-. That gender-changing operation and other, less dramatic transgender behavior are blurring our neat borders should help us understand the very different Roman attitudes. Today you can have a lesbian who was born a man and a gay male who was born a woman or a male in prison who behaves in ways that to the outside world appear homosexual, but to the prison, the community does not, alongside the more traditional homosexual, bisexual, and heterosexual roles.

Instead of today's gender orientation, ancient Roman (and Greek) sexuality can be dichotomized as passive and active. The socially preferred behavior of a male was active; the passive part aligned with the female.

But before I go further, let me stress: this is an oversimplification .

To be an ancient Roman male in good standing meant you initiated penetrating acts of sex. Whether you did this with a female or a male, enslaved or free person, wife or prostitute, made little difference—as long as you were not on the receiving end, so to speak. Certain people were off-limits, though, and among them were free youths. This was a change from the Greek attitude which, again to simplify, condoned such behavior in the context of a learning environment. The ancient Greek education of its youth had begun as training in the arts necessary for battle. Since physical fitness was the goal, education took place in a gymnasium (where physical training was in the buff). Over time the education came to encompass more academic parts, but instruction in how to be a valuable member of the polis continued. Often this included having an older male take a younger (post-pubescent, but still unbearded) one under his wing -- with all that entailed.

For the ancient Romans, who claimed to have adopted other "passive" behaviors from the ancient Greeks , free youths were untouchable. Since adolescents were still appealing, Roman males gratified themselves with youthful enslaved people. It's thought that in the baths (in many ways, successors to the Greek gymnasia), freedmen wore a talisman around their necks to make it clear their naked bodies were untouchable.

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To understand ancient Roman sexuality, we first need to understand how Roman society functioned. Roman society was first and foremost a patriarchal society where men dominated and set the rules be it in business, politics, legal matters or even religion. Women had fewer rights than men, they could not vote or hold public office, and they were under the control of their husbands or fathers ( patria potestas ). Men could have sexual relationships with partners deemed permissible including slaves or prostitutes and that was not considered adultery 2 , whereas women couldn't. Sexuality for men was related to ideas of masculinity and male domination.
Prostitutes actually appear in the erotic art of the Suburban Baths of Pompeii suggesting that prostitution was commonplace and well accepted. Until the late Republic , Roman baths had a section for women or different schedule for men and women, while during the Roman Empire, baths, like the Suburban Baths of Pompeii, were mixed. However, women bathing naked with men were probably lower-class women or infames such as entertainers or prostitutes. Emperor Hadrian (reign: 117 – 138 AD) banned mixed bathing, but the ban seems not to have endured 7 .
Was homosexuality more prevalent in Ancient Rome than it is today? Even though no historian can really answer this question, the answer is probably not. There were probably a good number of men who abhorred homosexuality, but in the prevalent patriarchal and slave-oriented culture of Ancient Rome, where some human beings were considered as mere objects, it would have been seen as just another form of sexual activity and... a matter of taste. Even though it is hard to understand today, what was more important was the role (active or passive) and status of the Roman male.
Group sex, sex parties, orgies were probably something reserved to a very small section of the upper class though. Most Romans lived ordinary lives, had to work hard to make ends meet and would probably not want to tarnish their family's reputation by being involved in such activities. Roman orgies are also often confused with the religious festivals such as those in the honor of Bacchus or Lupercus , both fertility gods, which involved a lot of nudity. Sometimes these festivals went out of control and, as a result, were later reformed by the Roman pontifices . For example, the kind of worship of Bacchus which often involved debauchery was criminilized in 186 BC to be replaced by a reformed version.
As we previously pointed out, Roman law protected the Roman citizen from sexual misconduct ( stuprum ) whereas Roman slaves and non-citizens did not enjoy the benefits of libertas . This meant that Roman citizens, male or female, were off-limits while sex with slaves or prostitutes was easily available. According to Roman law, rape could only be committed against a citizen in good standing. A woman who worked as a prostitute, as an actress or as a dancer lost her social standing and became an infamis . By making her body publicly available, she had lost her right to be protected from sexual abuse or physical violence 3 .
As far as homosexuality is concerned, the Lex Scantinia of c. 149 BC prosecuted adult male citizens who took a passive role in sexual relations with other men or who had sex with freeborn male minors. The law did not prohibit homosexual behavior as such, but punished male citizens taking the passive role or committing sex crimes ( stuprum ) against freeborn male minors.
At the beginning of the Roman Empire, Rome's first emperor, Augustus (reign: 27 BC – 14 AD), passed laws (the Leges Juliae ) in 18-17 BC as part of his program to restore the mos maiorum or traditional social norms, following a period of instability, while consolidating his political authority. This goes to show that Rome was traditionally a conservative society and not the modern imagination of a sex-crazed society. The Leges Juliae main objectives were to increase the population by encouraging marriage and having children and to restore the morality of the upper classes. The laws had a section pertaining to adultery, the Lex Iulia de adulteriis (translation: "Julian Law concerning acts of adultery") which was primarily directed at married women who committed adultery. The law made adultery a public matter and punished adultery with banishment and with the confiscation of part of property. Husbands and fathers had the right to kill the partners in adultery under certain circumstances even though this was rarely carried out. Augustus actually applied this law to his very own daughter Julia who was banished and sent to the island of Pandateria.
For example, Lupercalia was a religious festival taking place on February 15 whose purpose was to expel the evil spirits and to purify the city ( februum means purification in Latin), thereby bringing health and fertility. This festival involved some people running half-naked with thongs of goat-skin in imitation of the god Lupercus .
Floralia was another religious festival in honor of the fertility goddess Flora, the goddess of flowers and of the season of spring held between April 28th and May 3rd. This religious festival involved prostitutes who danced naked and fought in mock gladiator combat. There were also a number of gods linked to sexuality such as Liber, the god of viticulture and wine, fertility and freedom, the god Cupid ( Cupido ), the god of desire, erotic love, attraction and affection, the imported Greek fertility god Priapus protector of livestock, fruit plants, gardens and male genitalia, the phallic marriage god Mutunus Tutunus who promoted marital sex. A lot of the sexual art found by archeologists was related to Roman superstitions linked to the Roman religion. For example, the phallus, found in the form of an amulet or wind chimes, was supposed to have powers to ward off the evil eye and other malevolent supernatural forces 1 .
It can be said that all these gods promoted life and fertility as opposed to death. It does not mean that all Roman religion promoted sex. Vesta was the virgin goddess of the hearth, home and family, and the guardian of the Roman people and the religious festival Vestalia held between June 7th and 15th was one of the most important in Ancient Rome. Vesta was rarely shown in human form but was personified by the fire of her temple in the Forum Romanum . The Vestal Virgins were full-time priestesses of Vesta who tended the sacred fire at the hearth of the temple. They had to observe absolute chastity for 30 years. A Vestal Virgin who violated her vow of chastity was entombed alive in a ritual that resembled a Roman funeral. Her lover was executed. Therefore, one of the most important goddesses in the Roman religion was a virgin goddess.
The spread of Christianity throughout the Roman empire, its acceptance with the Edict of Milan in 313 AD under Constantine the Great (reign: 306–337 AD), and its adoption as the state religion with the Edict of Thessalonica of 380 AD, had a dramatic impact on Roman customs and sexuality and impacts our culture to this day. Many of the Roman religious traditions either faded away or were banned altogether. As we previously pointed out, Vesta was a very important goddess for the Romans. She was so important that her cult continued well into the fourth century AD until it was forcibly disbanded by emperor Theodosius I in 391 AD. Pope Gelasius I (494-496 AD) considered Lupercalia a vile festival and sought to abolish it. The senate protested and insisted that Lupercalia was essential to Rome's well-being and safety. Then Pope Gelasius suggested with disdain to senator Andromachus that they should celebrate it themselves and run around naked if they thought that this rite was salutary.
The gradual disappearance of all the pagan cults and the establishment of Christianity as the main religion, led to gradual changes in beliefs and attitudes towards sexuality. Some historians believe that the modern perception of Roman society as a decadent society comes in fact from early Christianity. Christians viewed celibacy as ideal and sex as inherently sinful, redeemed somewhat only if it took place within marriage 8 . Christianity put the emphasis on monogamy and expanded the definition of adultery to include married men having sexual relations with anyone other than their wives, including slaves or prostitutes. "But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband." (Corinthians 7:2). Under Emperor Justinian I (reign: 527 – 565 AD), laws against adultery, albeit less strict for men, could also be applied to husbands who cheated on their wives 9 .
Even though Christian Rome was more conservative than pagan Rome when it comes to sexuality, especially the sexuality of men, it also gave more rights to women. For example, under Justinian I, married women were no longer put to death for adultery and were rather sent to a convent. Wronged husbands were no longer required to divorce their wives as with the Lex Iulia de adulteriis and had the right to pardon them. With the previous Roman law, if the wronged husband did not divorce his wife he could be charged with pandering ( lenocinium in Latin from the word leno , "pimp").
With Christianity, the official attitude toward prostitution became chillier. Constantine I , the first Christian emperor, accepted it as a fact of life but taxed prostitutes. Theodosius II prohibited fathers from making a profit from their daughters, and slave owners from prostituting their slaves. Emperor Leo I banned prostitution outright and Theodora , a former prostitute herself, attempted to put an end to it as soon as she became empress 9 10 .
Even though the prosecution of homosexuality as a general crime began before the adoption of Christianity, laws against homosexuality became tougher under the Christian Empire. Men taking the passive role were punished by burning by the end of the 4th century AD. Under the Theodosian Code ( Codex Theodosianus ), the punishment for "a man coupling like a woman" was "death by sword". In the 6th century, under emperor Justinian I, all homosexual sex, passive or active, no matter who the partners were, was declared "contrary to nature" and punishable by death.
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Interesting facts about ancient Roman sexuality

Lesbianism was illegal in Ancient Rome.
It was during the brutal reign of Tiberius, the emperor who lived a life of debauchery, that Jesus was crucified, under the authority of Pontius Pilate, the Roman governor of Judea at the time.
A lot of sexual words such as fellatio , cunnilingus , etc come from Latin.

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The 'Lupanar of Pompeii' features a number of old wall paintings which show explicit scenes
RAUNCHY services offered in Roman brothels more than 2,000 years ago have been revealed through wall paintings in Pompeii.
The 'Lupanar of Pompeii' features a number of old wall paintings which show explicit scenes.
The famous brothel, which once had ten rooms, was popular with men before the Roman city was wiped out in 79AD.
It has become a major tourist attraction since it was reopened to the public in 2006.
It is believed the paintings, which depict group sex and many other acts, indicate the various services on offer.
Each one of the ten rooms in the brothel contained a stone bed which was covered with a mattress where the prostitute would entertain clients.
It has been suggested however that the images on the wall are an idealised version of sex and that the reality for those living in the brothel was much more grimmer.
Some researchers believe prostitutes in Pompeii were slaves and were not trained in any profession meaning they had no real alternatives for work.
Also they believe the chambers of the brothel were windowless, cramped and uncomfortable places.
Western University Professor Kelly Olson, who has visited the site, spoke to CBC's programme 'The Nature of Things' .
She said: "It is not a very nice place to work.
"It's very small, dank and the rooms are rather dark and uncomfortable."
Oslon also explained how prostitution was legal in Pompeii but most of the woman were slaves.
She added: "Married men could sleep with anyone as long as they kept their hands off other men's wives.
"Married women were not supposed to have sex with anyone else."
Despite being closed for more than 2,000 years, some holiday makers have attempted to re-christen the building, the Daily Mail has reported .
Three French people were arrested in 2014 for trespassing after reportedly breaking into the site for a late night romp.
Pompeii is an ancient Roman town near Naples in Italy.
An eruption of Mount Vesuvius in 79AD destroyed and buried most of the city under between 13 and 20ft of volcanic ash and pumice.
The city's sudden burial actually protected it against vandalism, looting and the destructive effects of climate and weather.
The ruins of Pompeii were first discovered in the 16th Century and a number of artefacts were uncovered.
It is known as a Roman town frozen in time and now is a popular tourist destination and sees up to 2.5m visitors a year who are able to look around Roman shops, baths and houses.
The city also has UNESCO World Heritage Site status, which means it is recognised as a historic landmark and is protected by international treaties.
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