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New Swinger Stories

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6/13/22



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Hank and Cleo are married 40-something realtors from northern New Jersey who can’t keep their hands off each other because of their secret life — the two enjoy “soft-swapping,” or cavorting naked with other couples in hotel rooms and at sex parties without ever “going all the way.”  
“We don’t do intercourse but everything else is good,” Cleo told The Post. (She and the other soft-swappers interviewed for this article asked that their names be changed to protect their anonymity.)
“Soft-swapping” — or “soft-swinging” — is unusual enough that even noted sexperts weren’t overly familiar with the topic until a TikTok went viral earlier this month and brought attention to the saucy lifestyle .
“The whole group was intimate with each other,” Mormon social-media influencer Taylor Frankie Paul revealed on a TikTok livestream , referring to her and her husband Tate’s unorthodox relationships with other couples in Utah.
“Tate has made out with several girls and other things, and I’ve made out with all of the husbands and vice versa,” she added.
While Paul said soft-swinging contributed to the destruction of her marriage to Tate, experts say the “esoteric” practice can be a safer way for couples to get kinky.
“It could be a risk-mitigation strategy in that it allows for some degree of sexual novelty without taking as much risk for STIs and/or unintended pregnancy,” Dr. Justin Lehmiller, host of the “ Sex and Psychology Podcast ,” told The Post.    
That’s the case for Donna, a 40-something Queens divorcée who enjoys the sex-party scene but soft-swaps to avoid the risks of going all the way.    
“Right now I freak out about STDs and wish people had STD cards, like COVID cards,” Donna told The Post. She said the practice allows her to “enjoy” others in a way that’s more “comfortable” for her. 
Hank and Cleo’s soft-swapping journey started around 2018. Over cocktails with girlfriends on a Caribbean vacation, Cleo shared how much she’d enjoyed occasional group experiences in college. Now that she was married, she felt like that was no longer an option.
A friend questioned her thinking, so Cleo decided to broach the subject with Hank. He was initially not amused.
“I said, ‘You’re outta your f- -king mind,’” Hank recalled with a laugh.  
But his opinion quickly changed when he got “really turned on” filling out applications to NYC sex clubs Chemistry and Hacienda. Shortly thereafter, the couple found themselves enjoying the company of naked strangers, albeit with restrictions.  
“Our do-or-die rule [is]: We do everything together in the same room at the same time,” Hank said.   
That “everything” includes threesomes and foursomes. And while intercourse isn’t on the menu — making out, foreplay, mutual masturbation and oral sex are.
Cleo says soft-swapping feels like a more “feminist” way to indulge her fantasies since it’s not so focused on “thinking about the man’s pleasure,” but rather becomes a way to fulfill a “need to be touched but also psychologically aroused.”  
“Another benefit of soft-swapping for women is that we have so many parts that feel good when touched, and realistically one person can’t get to all of them at once,” Cleo said.  
Still, it hasn’t always been easy. 
After their first trip to the Brooklyn-based sex party Chemistry, Cleo and Hank returned to their hotel as the sun rose over Manhattan and immediately had a screaming match in the street.  
They argued over whether either of them had fun that night, or who’d had the most fun, before decamping to their suite to enjoy another hour of great sex together.  
“We were just exhausted,” Hank said. “It was a big flood of emotions but I wouldn’t say jealousy plays any part in it,” he insisted.  
The couple’s soft-swapping escapades may have brought them closer, too.  
“I feel more people would be happier, and happier in their marriages, if they just opened them up a little,” Cleo said.  

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Wildly in love wife and mom, unapologetic bisexual and free spirit. Half of the consensually non-monogamous couple who write The Monogamish Marriage blog.

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I received a text to ask to pick up the kids. I was heading that way anyway so was happy to help. He texted back something funny which I found quite random and funny. This reserved dude was actually quite entertaining. A side I wanted to see a bit more of.
He text me again and I answered. This lasted during the night, not at all what i was expecting. I figured he was on the juice as it was golf night. The next day i received a morning text from him, I didn’t reply straight away but he kept texting until I replied. We texted all day and again through the night. I was actually in bed when I told him I was watching TV. I wasn’t but wanted to see if he would come around.
I was dressed in my favourite attire – my dressing gown and passion killer PJs.
It was actually quite late but he made the effort to come over so I offered him a beer. We chatted for ages and I cant recall ever watching the TV. I may have looked at the TV but I was nervous.
I moved closer to him. I’ve never made the first move EVER and I didnt know how this would be received. Hmmm he noticed but still nothing. I didn’t know whether he felt the same thing. I knew he had slept with another person so I initially thought that I wasn’t his type or was too ugly for him.
However I did know we were comfortable talking to each other. Time was getting on and he said he should get going. I actually was secretly gutted and thought it was now or never. He was by the door and I leaned in and kissed him.
Oh my fucking god, it wasn’t returned. I had never felt such embarrassment in my life.
I felt my face flush and sat on the couch. He came in and I asked him to leave. I asked him to leave a few times and he just stood there. My world got soooo small I wanted to crawl into a little hole and die.
He came over to me and tried to talk to me, thank fuck it was dark, my face was burning with embarrassment.
He came over to me and said are you sure you know what you are getting yourself into. I said I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t know what I was getting into. He stood me up, my face was looking at the ground. He lifted my chin and my eyes met his he leaned into me and kissed me. I returned the kiss, his lips were full and he kissed with passion. The feeling of rejection miles away but the thought of him just doing it to please me still lingered. We kissed for a while and his hands wandered through my body.
I knew my PJ’s were soaked from my juices flowing.
He knew what he was doing, his hands and lips touching and caressing every part of me. He fondled my nipples. I found it quite pleasurable considering i thought i had no sexual feeling in them anymore. He took me places i hadn’t felt in a while and he hadn’t even touched me there yet.
He pulled down my pants and felt the wetness, again I was embarrassed. My scent was strong. He spread my legs apart and through the matted bush he found my clit, his head went in exploring my sensitive bits. He was only there for a short period as I knew I was about to come and I needed him inside me….
I came…..
My body was sooooo sensitive that I couldn’t let him touch me. He probably thought I was weird. My body still convulsing, he is looking confused, he didn’t do anything wrong, he did everything right.
I calmed down and was able to clearly see his body, I wanted to touch all of him – I did…..
His body was beautiful, from his head down. He was circumcised as well. My hands ran down his body, he was hard. I fondled his nipples and he sighed, yusss I knew he had a sensitive spot. My hands went further down his body.
We were on the couch and he put his cock inside me. He was strong and gave me his all. I loved every stroke he gave me. I moved my body with his, enveloping his cock. He had already made me cum and my juices were still flowing. He picked me up and turned me around and took me from behind.
My initial thought was “he doesn’t want to see me when he cums” I don’t think that was the case. He held my hips as he was pumping in and out. His hand reaching around and fondling me. I was blown away and thankful the kids didn’t come into the lounge. Was pretty freakn risky but it only felt like we were the only ones around and nothing else mattered.
He lifted me up, turned me around and kissed me, he then held me. I loved the fact that he spread his legs wide so i didn’t have to stand on tippy toes to cuddle him. I found him to be quite sensitive to the detail that I like. We dressed and he left.
I had no idea what just happened but it felt good. I wondered if he would talk to me the next day……
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