Jerk Off Guide

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Jerk Off Guide



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Current time: 06/30/2022 01:21:23 pm (America/New_York)
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Want to learn how to jack off? The best way is usually the one that simply feels the best, though some might look for a way to do it faster, or a way to be quieter, or even something that is more exciting than the typical sexual fun. Every method is different, just as every person is different. But once you find the best way, you might keep going back to that one method over and over again.
Here are a variety of ways to “choke the chicken” or “beat the bishop” that will have you enjoying yourself much more thoroughly than you do right now.
Using a bit of lube, cover your finger and the tip of your penis with the slick stuff. Then twirl your finger around and around the head of your penis until you approach orgasm. Go faster when you get closer.
Use one hand as you normally would, but place the other above or below that one, and use both of them to maintain the motion you need to have an orgasm. You might be surprised by how much harder your orgasm is!
Most people masturbate by moving their hand up and down. Instead, to experience the best way to jerk yourself off, make a fist with your hand and push into it, as though you were having sex with someone.
When you are very close, remove your hand. You might feel the throbbing of an orgasm, but you will ejaculate very little. Allow yourself to calm down a bit, then go again. The second time around is even better.
Why just use lube on your penis? Some like to use it everywhere, and use their free hand to tickle their testicles or play with their anal area. This kind of play will make you more inclined to try other things in the future once you see how good it feels.
Masturbate standing up in front of the sink. When you are just about to get off, push the head of your penis underneath a thin stream of cold water. The sensation will be intense, and as a bonus, you will be all cleaned up when you are done.
As you are using one hand in the best way to jerk off, use the other to press hard on the skin between your testicles and your anus. This area is right over the prostate gland. Your orgasm will be more intense if you keep up the pressure at that spot.
When you are masturbating, have a bowl of very warm water nearby. Right before you are ready to get off, dip your balls into that warm water, all while still masturbating. It is said to make the orgasm much more intense.
When you are masturbating like you usually do, use your free hand to pull down on your testicles. This will tighten the skin around your shaft and lead to an entirely different sensation. You might have to use lube with this one to keep from having too much friction.
Sit on one of your hands until it is tingly – that “falling asleep” feeling. Then use that hand to masturbate. It might feel like someone else is working on your penis until you get off. Strange, but nice.
Look into the mirror as you masturbate. Bonus points if you use a mirror in which you can’t see your face, so you can imagine who might be jerking you off – someone other than yourself!
Call a halt to all your masturbation activities for one week. It might seem impossible, but you can do it! And it might be your best way to jerk yourself off. Next time you start, you will get off very quickly, and the sensation will be extremely intense.
Instead of jerking up and down, why not twist your hands from side to side? This swiveling around your penis can feel strange, but you might be surprised how quickly you can get off, especially if you use warming lube while you do it.
Rather than masturbate as you normally do, push your penis down between your legs. Lube up your thighs and close them tightly. Then move just slightly enough to get a bit of friction going. You can also tuck your testicles under while you do this.
When you are getting close, stop the stroking and slap your penis against your belly and your thighs. Do this in a rhythmic fashion, and soon you will be close again. Slap harder at the big finish.
Use a heating pad on your penis for a few minutes. At the same time, submerge your hand in very cold water. Get yourself hard, then use the icy hand to masturbate.
Instead of using your hands, hump a few pillows on the bed and imagine that you are having sex with someone. The friction of the bed underneath you feels heavenly and your hands are free to play with other parts of your body. 
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Last Updated 30 June, 2022.



There comes a time when we all need a little help to reach an orgasm. Whether this help is in the form of a partner who teases us and makes us lose our mind or it’s a hot girl on the other side of the screen encouraging us to climax or it’s something else entirely, it doesn’t matter. Everyone has their kinks and preferences in sex and porn. 
Through running this blog, both my girl and I have gotten requests for writing something erotic, something that is less a review and more about getting up close and personal. 
Maybe you’d like to know how I please a woman? 
Or maybe you’d enjoy picturing my curvy girlfriend having fun with your erection? 
Whatever the reason is, these requests have encouraged us to slowly, cautiously, venture into the world of JOI. Let’s start nice and slow, first with a definition of what that is, then where you can find great JOI, and finally, something sexy that my girl wrote specifically for you. 
JOI stands for Jerk Off Instructions, as it says in the title of this post. Basically, it is a role play where someone on the other side of the proverbial internet line encourages you to touch yourself and achieve an orgasm. 
This person can be of any sexual orientation and gender identity you like, and the JOI can come in the form of a porn video, a live stream, an audio recording, or a written story. That last one you will find in this review if you’re patient enough. 
JOI is a porn niche that many people enjoy. Some, in fact, find that they can’t orgasm without good JOI, or that they don’t appreciate their alone time as much. 
Regardless of why you’re curious about this, let me direct you to the best JOI I’ve ever stumbled upon. These will make your blood hot, dick hard, and toes curling in a blink of an eye.
Are you even truly surprised that there are endless JOI on Reddit? Well, you shouldn’t be. Reddit is porn heaven, where there are no kinks or fetishes without a lovely community that will welcome you with open arms. This social media platform is abundant with spicy stories and instructions for you to play around with and try to up your jerk-off game. 
Here, I will list my favorite JOI that you can find in the r/joi subreddit. They are video instructions, meaning you can just sit back and relax, unzip your pants and enjoy the ride. While the posts usually contain just a preview of the JOI, you usually can find the full version of the video in the comment section. 
Why don’t we start off with a mature bang:
With a low, sultry voice, right at the beginning, you know that this MILF means business. She is insanely hot, with shapely legs, perfectly round tits that she squeezes and kneads, and an ass that is maybe not too plump but is definitely worth the watch. She starts off the video in a skimpy silver dress and silver heels but ends it completely naked. 
You might notice grumbling about the lack of nipples in the comment section, and that would be my one complaint, too. This MILF keeps it tame and coy throughout, which isn’t a bad thing, but after eighteen minutes, you do wish for something more explicit to tip you over the edge. Overall, a nice, slightly vanilla experience.
Following a clear storyline, this JOI begins with you being in the middle of a piano lesson with a hot MILF piano teacher. Raylene, as her name apparently is, is a convincing actress as she plays the part of a teacher who likes her student and is at first surprised at seeing him having pulled his dick out during the lesson.
However, she quickly recovers and starts undressing to encourage you. Unlike the previous MILF, this one doesn’t shy away from dirty talk or getting fully naked and spread open in front of you. A shot of her sucking on her own nipples is truly a sight to behold, so you can’t miss out on this steamy JOI. 
What would you do if you suddenly found yourself near a hot blonde whose tits are hanging out of her loose top? You’d stare at them, of course! This is how the JOI starts, and it continues with those boobs coming out for some fun and an enticing JOI time.
The sad part is that the full video of this clip has been removed from the original website for whatever reason. You can still watch the preview on r/joi, but you can also search for more videos in the Downblouse Jerk series. It’s an entire genre and a website, so you can find plenty of more content like this in no time. 
This cutie doesn’t show her face, but she does a great job of making you beg for more. It is her first attempt at a JOI, but she checks all the boxes: husky voice, teasing and dirty talk, clear instructions, touching herself, exposing her small boobs, cute and hot and quickly getting you hard. 
While I don’t have any real complaints about this one, some of the other guys have suggested the addition of a countdown in her videos, which I wholeheartedly agree with. The countdown puts added pressure, makes you feel like you’re racing against time, and makes the orgasm that much more intense at the end. Do let me know in the comments what this hot girl’s last sentence does for you.
In one of the rare JOI on this list that includes sex toys, this curly babe is bound to make you hot and bothered in seconds. She is a little older, but a lot cuter, and her curly hair is something you will definitely want to pull on in ecstasy. At the same time, her boobs are huge and the way she sucks on her dildo leaves little to the imagination. 
The downside to this JOI is that, much like another one on this list, it has been removed from its original site. You only get the preview on Reddit, as well as a slightly longer version in a link at the top of the post. This longer version comes without any sound, though, so you have to imagine the glorious sucking noises this MILF is surely making. What a shame. 
Ever wanted to try orgasm denial ? Now’s your chance, with the queen or edging herself. This redhead dom is very clear about what’s going to happen in the video: she is going to tease you and play with you, and she is going to satisfy herself with a toy, but you are absolutely not allowed to climax until she says it’s okay. I’m all about these types of games.
The sexy dom has a nice voice and an even nicer pussy. She uses a dildo to masturbate for you, with mind-reeling squelching noises, and good luck keeping it together when she starts licking her own juice off her fingers. While her acting may use a bit more polishing, this JOI is definitely worth checking out.
If you want more you can check out this amazing list of NSFW sub-reddits .
If you’re not in a position to watch videos, maybe you’ll be more interested in audio JOI? Most of these are hosted on an erotic literature site, but they are actual audio recordings of people urging others to climax. 
Some of these are meant for women, so, ladies, you’re in exactly the right spot if you’ve come for some sexy voices to help you relax and get comfortable with touching yourself. Here are some of the best JOI audios out there:
Since this audio is over thirty-seven minutes long, you know you’ll have plenty of time to tease yourself before you’re ready to come. The male voice here has a slight British accent that my girlfriend tells me is incredibly sexy, and he is very good at reassuring you and making you feel safe. 
He introduces some elements of intimacy and gentleness, which you don’t often find in JOI for men. But this guy knows what women want, and he’s very detailed in his descriptions. The way his voice gets deeper and raspier at the end as he himself is nearing orgasm is truly something that will send hot shivers down your spine. 
Secret Dreamer is a male recorder, but he is aware that he has a male fanbase as well, and he wanted to create a special treat for his male listeners. So essentially, this is a JOI meant for men loving men. Similarly to the previous one, the recorder has a nice accent that makes him sound foreign and seductive. 
He guides you to relax and lie down, and the entire audio is slow and sensual. He takes generous breaks for you to follow the pace without any problems, for you to actually perform what he’s asking you to do. I am not into gay erotica, but I think I would have liked him to just pick up the pace a tiny bit near the end so that the release after the build-up is more explosive.
If you’re unfamiliar with fantasy lore, a succubus is a type of demon that usually takes the form of a gorgeous woman intent on having sex with you over and over again. In this audio JOI, that is exactly what happens: you have summoned a succubus, and now she is focused solely on you, eager to get you hard and hear what you sound like when you orgasm. 
The female voice is smooth, easy to like and understand, and she plays the part of a dark, mysterious hell creature so well. She is not there to actually instruct you on how to jerk off, but to narrate a sex scene with you, complete with her moans and whiny whispers. With an unconventional twist, this JOI shouldn’t be overlooked in any way. 
Eve’s Cock Worship III starts with a naughty bang, without any slow overture or introduction of any kind. This sexy girl is all about worshipping your dick, and she is very open and honest about all the situations in which she loves it. She waxes poetic about your cock, more in a dirty way than in a literature way, which we all appreciate. 
Her voice is accompanied by wet and sucking sounds, as though you really are jerking off right next to her and obediently following her instructions; as though she really is on her knees in front of you and eager to take you in her mouth. I have to say that I haven’t heard audio this filthy in a long time, and I barely got to the end of it before I came. 
Exactly what its title says, this JOI is an orgasm challenge for women. Namely, the man narrating the JOI will count from one hundred to zero, at which point he will orgasm, and he hopes that you will, too. His rich voice reminds my girlfriend of Jamie Dornan, the 50 Shades of Gray actor, and his British accent is nothing to be sneered at. 
The countdown he does may not be for everyone, however. He is really into the counting and a little less into actually describing anything other than providing kissing and sucking noises at the same time. My girl says this didn’t exactly work for her since she felt pressured to come at the right time. But the myriad of positive comments this audio has suggests that plenty of ladies think otherwise.
Similarly to The Succubus JOI, this one is more of sex simulation and an audio sex story in first person POV than an actual JOI. Nevertheless, it gets the job done and so I’m including it in this list as one of my favorite stories ever that made me blackout a little when I came. The girl talking to you is consumed with want and so eager to get her hands on your body that it’s insane.
She does a wonderful job describing what she’d like you to do to her, what she’d like to do to you, followed by plenty of blowjob wet sounds. She also talks about how she’d like to ride you, and that is the part where I knew I’d be coming back to this JOI as many times as I possibly could.
If you enjoy these audios, you’ll love our nsfw asmr audios .
Missed my big tits? These pink nipples have been waiting for you. Look at how one is already peeking out of my lace bra. It’s happy to see you again.
I’m also happy to see you again. I told my boyfriend you’re the best cock I’ve ever had, including him.
He didn’t like that so much. Whatever. He doesn’t have any say in it, since he’s allowed me to fuck whoever I want.
And I want you, baby. I’m so excited to play with you again. 
Are you hard? Do you want to touch yourself for me? Just slowly, palm yourself over your clothes. Feel your dick, and imagine I’m feeling it. Fuck, I love it so much. I love feeling it grow under my hand. I love knowing that my body, my voice, my tits and my already wet little pussy are making you bigger. Harder. More eager. 
Do you like the lingerie set I picked out for you today? The red bra and the panties you can see my pussy through. If I turn around, you can see my whole ass, round as it is, since it’s just a string thong. If I bend over, you can see how ready I am for you. I bet you want to dip your finger inside, don’t you? 
First, I want you to take out your cock. Oh my, it’s bigger than I remember it. Mmmmm, I’d love to wrap my lips around the head. You like the heat of my mouth, don’t you? You remember how good it felt when I swallowed you whole? 
How about stroking your cock a little for me? Without rush, slowly, from the bottom up to the tip. Like that, yes. 
Need a little wetness? Use lube or lotion, or spit into your hand. Imagine me licking a stripe from your balls all the way up to the head, maintaining eye contact the whole time. I love watching you when your dick is in my mouth. I love seeing your reactions, and I love how you watch me while I’m blowing you. 
That’s it, baby, I’m going to make you feel so good. I’m slipping off the straps of my bra, and my tits are so big they’re already spilling out. They’re all-natural, baby, and they really want you to squeeze them. I love it when you play with my nipples when you twist them and suck them into your mouth. 
Fuck, I’m so wet. Are you stroking your cock, baby? Does it feel good? Don’t you dare go faster! This isn’t about a quick, easy release. This is going to be a build-up, slow and steady, and you’re going to be begging me to cum by the end of it. 
See how there’s already a wet patch on my panties? If I sit down and spread my legs, my smooth, smooth legs, you can clearly see how much I need you. 
If I pull the thong to the side, you get a nice shot of my clean pussy, pink and shining. Want to put a finger in? 
Keep jerking off and imagine how you’re putting a finger in my mouth. I want to make it nice and wet so you can then take that finger and slide it into me. Oh, I go tense all over.
I would go crazy on that one finger. In and out, in and out of my heat… I would need you to add more and fast because I’m impatient and hungry to be filled up. 
Are you still stroking yourself slowly? Want to make it a tiny bit quicker? Just a little bit, just enough to picture yourself jerking off while you’re fucking me with your fingers. Keep it wet, baby, keep it nice and wet and easy for yourself.
I wouldn’t last long before I’d be pleading for your cock. I meant it when I said I loved it. I don’t even want you to take off my panties. I just want you to keep them out of the way, align yourself, and tease me with your cockhead. Smearing my juices down, all the way to my ass, making me shiver, and back up again. 
Then I want you to slam into me as hard as you can. 
I would cry out. I know you like it hard, I know you like to pound into me with such force that my tits bounce all over. 
Do you feel it? Is your hand working you just the way you want it to? 
Can you picture looking down at where your cock is going inside my pussy? How my legs are wide-stretching every day for you – and how my wetness makes lewd noises just for you. 
I would moan so loud. You know I can barely control myself. I don’t care who hears. Are you also being loud, baby? I want to hear how you breathe hard, I want to hear you moan as you pump your cock, the way I moan for you as you fuck me. 
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