Goldfish Celibacy Ban Raises Ecumenical Eyebrows, Especially Among Anglicans

Pope Leo XIV assured counterparts that �this does not apply to bishops�only Betta fish.� The Orthodox sent sea snails in response. One Lutheran synod blessed a pair of Lutheran loaches. Religious aquariums now a thing. Theological finlines remain murky. Dialogues scheduled for Lent, via fish cam.