Dating Hot Girl In Wheelchair

Dating Hot Girl In Wheelchair




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Dating Hot Girl In Wheelchair
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AskMen, would you date a girl in a wheelchair? [28F]
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We don't know, but we'll answer anyway
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I've been in a wheelchair for 18 years. I've never been in a relationship or on a date.
I know I'm not ugly. I'm smart, funny, and have a generally positive attitude about life. So, the fact that I've have never been asked out by a guy makes me think it must be the chair.
Maybe guys find it intimidating, or they're scared of the unknown. I'm not sure what it could be. I know a number of guys in chairs who have wives/girlfriends, but think it's easier for men in wheelchairs because women tend to be more compassionate and enjoy the role of care taker.
AskMen, what do you think? Would you be willing to date someone in a wheelchair?
Also, do you have any advice on how I could help make potential "love interests" more comfortable with the situation and to see passed the chair to the fact that I'm just a regular person?
This made me laugh! You get a sticker!
What if she has a life size hot wheels?
Honestly I wouldn't rule it out completely but the reality is that I would be concerned about sex
I can only speak for myself, but sex is definitely doable! haha or maybe I should say, "I'm doable!" Haha
hahah. I'm kinda curious about that. LOL
Would I date a girl who uses a wheelchair? Sure, though why she's in the wheelchair would further modify my answer.
As would the elephant in the room as far as her ability to have and enjoy sex and what sort of role as a caregiver I'd be looking at taking on if we got serious.
Also, do you have any advice on how I could help make potential "love interests" more comfortable with the situation and to see passed the chair to the fact that I'm just a regular person?
If you express an interest in sex and sexuality, or even engage in some bawdy humor, that would help communicate that you're a sexual entity and clue most people in that some form of sexual interaction/stimulation is possible.
Without some idea as to whether someone who is wheelchair bound is sexual, I tend to file them as non-sexual until they indicate otherwise so that I don't say or do anything to give offense or make them feel bad because they no longer have or have never had the ability to conceive of a sexual relationship.
I can only speak purely for my own situation, I'm in a wheelchair becsuse I injured my spinal cord, so I'm paralyzed from the chest down.
For me, I'm lucky that I still have a lot of feeling in the paralyzed parts of my body so sex wouldn't be as difficult as if I couldn't feel at all (though many paralyzed people, feeling or not have very active sex lives!).
As for caretaker, I have people who come into my home and do the things I need help with. I refuse to ever let a significant other take care of me in that way. Unless of course he was very adamant in helping, but I would still keep him at a distance from my cares. No need to become a burden in any way.
Definitely. A number of years ago I was interested in dating a gal that was in a wheelchair (permanently). Nothing ever came of it, but the wheelchair had nothing to do with it.
Awesome! Thanks for the comment! :)
As for how to help guys get past it - get into situations where you can talk to guys naturally and personally. What kind of things are you interested in? Go join a club based on that, if you haven't already. (If you are already - how has that worked out?)
No judgement here, but can I ask why?
I can't say I'm active in any type of club, but I'm generally just active in life. I get myself into different things, for example, I got into politics just this past spring and I met a guy I thought was cool, but he ended up having a girlfriend so I didn't attempt to flirt/get to know/etc.
I wouldn't mainly because I am very active. I like to hike, mountain bike, fish, and all kinds of other stuff in the wilderness. I need any girlfriend I have to share those things with me. There's a lot of other men who are the same. There's probably just as many that would be open to dating a girl in a wheelchair too! I could see it being somewhat intimidating to approach a girl in a wheelchair just because of the "elephant in the room" of the wheelchair (can't think of a better way to put it). Ithink one thing that might help would be to break the ice about it asap...maybe make a funny joke about it if given the chance. You know you are comfortable with the situation and if you can make light of the situation it will definitely make someone else more open and comfortable with you too
I'm not typically into those activities you mentioned, but I know a number of girls in wheelchairs who actively enjoy those activities! So don't count us out completely! :)
I talked to one girl in a chair at a bar and she was nasty with me for whatever reason. In the future I would be paranoid the girl would think I might be approaching them solely due to reasons involving the chair, Like a bucket list / fetish thing or a pity thing, and be nasty to me again. If youre attractive I guarantee many have thought about getting to know you but stopped short out of fear of that happening.
The best way to make dudes comfortable is display a sense of humor about the situation. Learn all the wheelchair and blowjob jokes, because we're gonna be very afraid of offending.



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Love is love, no matter what kind of equipment I’m lugging around.
I’ve always waffled back and forth between being a hopeless romantic and a complete cynic. I’ve been in a wheelchair since I was 5 years old, as the result of a head-on car collision, and I used to subconsciously put up walls because of it. There have been times in my life when I was afraid no one would ever want to date a person in my situation. It’s a constant push and pull between trusting my instincts and being unsure of what’s to come.
Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about how to navigate my wheelchair, and how to have a normal life and normal relationships. What’s more interesting, though, is how others view and handle people with disabilities. Much of it comes from ignorance, while others want to try and demonstrate how cool they are with my disability, so they feel the need to call it out. People largely have good intentions, but just don’t know what to do.
So, here are some of the most important things you need to know when it comes to dating someone with a disability.
Definitely don’t try lines like “Can I have a ride?” “Do you want to race?” and “Don’t drink and drive.” Seriously. Never a good idea. These lines have been tried on me over a hundred times over the last few years, and they have literally worked once. In that case, it wasn’t the line, but the fact that the guy was just...super hot.
Related: Believe me when I tell you that not all people with disabilities know one another. Several men have come up to me at bars and tried to make conversation by saying, “Hey, my friend Dave is in a wheelchair. Maybe you know him?” Chances are, nope, I don’t know Dave. I can assure you, there’s not a secret club we all hang out at, and this is not a good way to make a first impression.
Honestly, women and men in wheelchairs would rather be approached with the same types of awful pickup lines as someone not in a wheelchair. Coming up to a woman and saying “Hey, gorgeous,” might be cheesy, but at least it could get you a smile.
I tried my hand at the world of online dating for a while (spoiler alert: it’s the worst), often leaving out the fact that I’m in a wheelchair until the conversation had progressed. To me, it shouldn’t have an impact on my level of attractiveness, but the guys I came into contact with usually had something offensive to say in response.
It’s totally understandable to be surprised, but it’s better to proceed with respect or explain your thoughts. Responding with a “gross” or “Shouldn’t you be trying to date someone else in a wheelchair?” is not only hurtful — it’s mean and ignorant.
This one can be a bit tricky, as it normally comes from a place of genuine concern. Some of my boyfriends have left me out of things like skiing or beach days, or constantly assumed I needed help because they thought activities would be too difficult for me. It’s better to ask first, and let me tell you what I can or can’t do, than to never ask and be left wondering (or exclude me).
To this day, the man that has taught me the most said to me, “Girl, if I thought you needed help, I wouldn’t be with you right now.” It wasn’t meant to be mean, but quite the opposite — he just always assumed that I could do anything, and I loved knowing someone had that faith in me.
One night while out in Vegas with a boyfriend, we were being stared at nonstop by almost everyone who walked by. The relationship was fairly new, and it was clear he wasn’t used to the strange looks. My heart broke for him as he asked, “Doesn’t it bother you when people stare at you?” Being stared at in public has become such a norm for me that I often don’t realize it’s happening, until it affects the person I’m with. It’s a bizarre experience at first, but eventually you learn to ignore it.
Most often I’m too polite for my own good, and when strangers approach me and whomever I’m dating, I often clam up or smile politely. They think they have the right to ask if we’re able to have children, or assume my boyfriend is my caretaker.
In one instance, I was getting out of my car at a beer festival and several strangers yelled at my boyfriend for not helping me. He told them that he needed more help than I ever would. And one time at a restaurant, when I was in college, a waitress addressed only my boyfriend until he pointed out that I could speak for myself.
The ability to think on your toes in situations like that will get you far — it’s a powerful way of showing others that you’re comfortable, and that the situation is totally normal.
Any relationship will falter when there’s not open communication, but it’s even more important when you’re dating someone with a disability. Whether it’s understanding the nature of the disability, expressing concerns, or asking how things are going to work in the boudoir, no question is off limits.
During a conversation with an old boyfriend, I mentioned the car accident I’d been in in passing, and he looked at me completely confused. We had known each other for three years, but he didn’t know why I was in a wheelchair because he had been so afraid to ask.
Just ask. Ask all the questions you want, even if you think they’re pointless. The answers might surprise you, and will probably be the difference between having an awesome relationship and a crappy one.
Nothing is sexier than a person who gives no fucks about a wheelchair because they’re just so focused on the person in it. A boring Friday night can instantly turn into a party with a bottle of wine, a spare wheelchair, and a stopwatch.
I’m normally hesitant to dance because I feel like the wheelchair gets in the way and can look completely stupid, but at a wedding a few years ago, my whole attitude was changed by a mysterious Zach Galifianakis lookalike. This particular guy had no qualms about the chair, dipping me and spinning me until we were both a little dizzy. The same person also believed in completely ditching the chair whenever possible. Three flights of stairs? No problem, throw the girl over your shoulder (although you should definitely ask first).
I say this partly in jest, but hey, let’s be honest — for every cloud there’s a silver lining. And in this case, dating a person in a wheelchair comes with unexpected perks for the plus-one. I can assure you, this is the only instance where you can go in an airplane bathroom with someone and they’ll think, Oh, he’s just helping her .
You also get killer parking spots, short wait times at amusement parks, great seats at ball games for cheap, and preferential treatment around the world. I definitely don’t recommend dating someone in a wheelchair just for the perks, but they do help make up for some of the tougher stuff.
I can’t stress this enough. We all have baggage; a person with a physical disability just has baggage they can’t hide. So don’t let the chair, or artificial limb, or whatever it may be, stop you from pursuing someone you find intriguing.
All of these tips and insights don’t matter unless you come from a place of genuine care and respect for the other person. A chair or something else they have no control over should never reduce the level of love and respect you have for someone.
So I leave you with words said not by me, but which every person deserves to hear at some point: “I don’t care about the chair, or anything else. I just know you’re amazing and I want everyone to know I’m with you.”
Lifestyle writer & PR pro. Simultaneously loves, loathes and fears stairs. Road Trip Aficionado.
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