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Opinion


Comment: The truth about being a gay 16-year-old at an all boys boarding school

© 2022 PinkNews ⦁ All Rights Reserved
16-year-old Olly Hudson writes for PinkNews.co.uk about his experiences of being gay at a private all boys boarding school in the UK. He despairs at the homophobic environment and the lack of acknowledgement by the school that homosexuality even exists.
My name’s Olly, and I’m a 16-year-old from South Wales. I’m also gay. I decided to write this, mainly because I feel it’s time for someone of my background, to speak up for a whole swathe of the young gay population, who right now, are effectively ignored and left to fend for themselves by the mainstream media, and the environment in which they grow up.
I’m talking about being middle class. I’m talking about going to an independent day/boarding boys’ school, and I’m trying to get across to those who’ll listen, what it means to try and grow up in an environment where, perhaps, the most active and healthy part of any young person’s life, their sexuality, is repressed, ridiculed, though for the most part, willfully ignored by teachers and adults in positions of authority around them.
I haven’t always been a student at a private school, which for now will remain nameless. Until the age of 13, I, like most people, went to a comprehensive school. There, I was most comfortable and indeed spent most of my time in the company of girls. A seeming failure to ever really integrate and become ‘one of the boys’ was I’d admit, the main driving factor behind my decision to leave the school. When I reflect upon it, I wouldn’t have made the same decision to leave, had I my time again, though having not fully come to terms with my sexuality by the age of 13, this would never have played into any decision at the time. But leave I did, and I ended up in an all boys’ school. Again, probably not the most sensible decision on reflection, though that’s something that, really, I’ve realised more recently, as I finally accepted my sexuality, and came out to my closest friends.
I suppose, I wrote this too, to try and dispel a common-held ‘urban myth’ regarding boys’ schools, and boarding schools in particular. Generally, they’re seen as hives of latent homosexuality, places where boys, frustrated only in the company of other boys, inevitably turn to one another to experiment sexually, gay or not. It’s something widely caricatured in popular culture, though is let me assure you, a load of nonsense.
The reality is very much the opposite. So conscious are most of the boys in my school of the abundance of males (and rarity of females), not to mention the homosexual stereotype, that they go over and above to assert their masculinity, an apparently quintessential aspect of which is to see whose ‘banter’ can descend to the deepest depths of homophobic, inane, misogynistic abuse.
For most of the guys, this constitutes ‘banter’. In any other context, namely one in which women are present – i.e. real life – this would be abuse, though they refuse to see it as such, for who in an all boys’ school could possibly be offended or hurt in any way by this loutishness, when nobody who it affects is seemingly there to hear it? That is of course, forgetting the gay guys. There aren’t many of us, though naturally, there are more than you might think, though we are forced to sit there in silence, and endure an endless torrent of homophobic abuse, most of which is invariably ignored by male teachers. Would they continue if we outed ourselves? Who knows, but who are we to turn round and counter a class full of rowdy, senseless boys on a testosterone high? If we did, goodness knows the onslaught of abuse that would result.
Celebs you didn’t know have an LGBT sibling
As I said, I think most of this comes out of an insecure, alpha-male desire to demonstrate conclusively to the other apes, that ‘I’m not gay’, but there are more, pernicious, and continually dangerous factors at play. I feel let down by those in positions of authority within the school. I feel angry, that in all my time at this particular school, I’ve had not one PSHE (personal, social and health education) lesson on the subject of homosexuality. Not one assembly on homophobia and its consequences. Not even the slightest acknowledgement – unless prompted – from many members of staff, that homosexuality even exists. I felt liberated in a recent philosophy class, led by an outside teacher, to be able to start a discussion on the nature of sexuality, and to really try and get my peers to acknowledge that being gay exists, and that it’s not something to suppress or live in willful blindness of. I think that was probably the first time I used the word ‘homosexuality’ in a classroom.
Although incredibly damaging to countless gay teenagers going through the school, this conspiracy of silence is also incredibly dangerous. How can we expect to do anything about the worrying rise in HIV diagnosis rates among young gay men, when from my experience, there exists not little, but zero homosexual sex education? Those who are perhaps less conscious of the risks of anal sex, owing often, to parental silence on the topic, are time and again being let down by a system which at present, is abjectly refusing to equip young men like myself, with the vital information to ensure that they run no risk of contracting a potentially devastating chronic illness.
I’ve thought about it more and more, and every time I do, it enrages me no end. That’s why homophobic arguments from the bigoted right against same-sex marriage, in fear that it might prompt the teaching of homosexual sex in schools, are actually life-threatening. In this case, prejudice, leading to silence on the issue, actually serves young men with a death-sentence.
I don’t pretend that things are all rosy for gay guys in state schools, because they most definitely aren’t. Prejudice exists in all corners of our society. But there can be no doubt that more is done, at least to make teenagers aware of the nature of homosexuality in the state system, than is done in the private sector, where it feels often, like the school has some kind of ‘don’t ask don’t tell’ policy in place.
I just wish that the taboo of talking about all things gay could be broken, and that has to emanate from the example set by authority. If senior teachers in private schools like mine, are making no effort to counter the disgraceful tide of homophobia that is just so virulent across the independent system, then we simply won’t see a shift in attitudes in this, affluent, and of course, influential sector of the population. And that’s the really scary bit. Unfortunately, the statistics tell us, that generally speaking, it’s going to be these guys who are the leaders of tomorrow, both in the world of business, and in spheres of political influence, and as a gay man, that scares me, it really does.
If you wish to write a comment article for PinkNews.co.uk, simply email news@pinknews.co.uk and one of the editorial team will be glad to review it.


Patrick Kelleher

-

October 16, 2022




Huw Lemmey and Ben Miller

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October 6, 2022




Florence H R Scott

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August 16, 2022



It had been a whirlwind first week for David at St. Dunstans Academy
for Boys. From the early morning shower, to lessons, meals, games, prep and lights out,
His life was now controlled and ordered by the Masters of the School. The slightest
infringement of School rules met with immediate punishment and Here He was in the
Headmasters Study, on Friday Punishment duty, waiting for the first of the allotted,
six strokes of the cane. As a first timer, He had been allowed the privilege of being
caned over His Trousers.

'Well boy, your first week at St. Dunstans and your name appears twice in the
punishment book, for general untidiness and for late attendance in Class.
This sort of slovenly behaviour will not be tolerated. Bend Over Boy! And touch your
toes.'

David obeyed. The tips of His fingers touched the end of His black shoes,
and there He waited for the first stroke of the Headmasters cane; the silence broken
only by the sound of the cane, swishing through the air as the Headmaster practiced
His technique; a few gentle taps of the cane on the grey material tightly stretched
over the boys round buttocks; then thwack!!! . A cry of pain as David instinctively
leapt into the air clutching His now stinging backside. The stroke had landed dead
centre, inflicting pain in equal measure on both cheeks.


Back into position Boy! Did I tell you, you could move.'

'No buts Boy, do as you're told or you'll receive the rest on the bare.'

'Yes Sir'. The stinging sensation seemed to grow not abate as David moved gingerly
back into position, tears welling in His eyes. He clenched His buttocks tightly in
readiness for the next stroke of the cane. This time it came without warning. Another
cry of pain, but somehow David managed to remain in position. If it hurt this much
with His trousers on what would it be like on the bare, He thought. As David waited
through gritted teeth for the third stroke, His mind sped back to a time less than
four weeks ago. He was at home, opening the letter containing His A Level results, a
letter that would eventually lead Him to St Dunstans College and His current
predicament.

It was with some trepidation that David had opened that fateful letter. Despite what
He had said to His parents He knew in His heart of hearts that he had probably failed
to get the necessary grades to get into the university of choice. As he fumbled with
the envelope, how He now regretted all those wasted hours watching TV, playing Computer
games and hanging out with His friends, when He should have been revising.

However, it was worse than even He had expected. David stared in disbelieve as the
reality of the situation slowly sunk in. Not only had He underachieved, as expected.
He had failed all but one of His exams. There was no chance of a university place now.
All His dreams and plans lay in ruins and worst of all He must now tell His parents
who were waiting expectantly for Him in the Kitchen, ready to congratulate their son,
the University undergraduate. They had no reason to believe He had not passed. He had
reassured them when they had questioned His commitment in the run up to the exams. The
exams had gone fine, He said. Now, the truth was unavoidable.

David felt as much ashamed as disappointed. He was to be the first member of the
family to go to university and He knew how much His going meant to His parents as well
as to Himself. They had supported and encouraged him throughout School and he had let
them and Himself down. Unable to say anything He simply handed them the letter. True
to form, they were once again looking on the positive side, being supportive. They
would help Him find a job, it wasn't the end of the world not going to University.
Yet He could see how bitterly disappointed they were. They wanted their son to go to
university almost as much as He did. Indeed David wanted to go to University more
than anything. He decided, in His mind, then and there to go back to School and
retake His Exams.

However, bent over, in the Headmasters Study with two painful cane marks on His
backside and four more to come wasn't quite what David had, had in mind!! The third
and fourth strokes followed in quick succession with barely time to react to the
searing pain running through His body. Once again David felt the gentle tap of the
cane on His trouser clad bottom as if were searching for a spot that had yet to be
hit. Then that now familiar sound of the cane flying through the air and David once
more tensed His body in preparation for the next Strike. 'Ahh…' He cried and despite
His best efforts once more sprang up in pain.

'Well boy, what did I tell you. Now trousers down, and just count yourself lucky I
don't give you all six strokes again.' David was openly crying now but He knew better
than to argue with the Headmaster and simply did, as He was hold, pulling His
trousers and white briefs down as He, once more, assumed the position. David had no
time to gather himself before the final stroke expertly found its target, leading to
more to more cries of pain and tears on the boys face.

'You may get up now and I hope that's a lesson well learnt'

'Yes Sir, thank you sir' cried the whimpering boy.

'Good. Now straight to be bed with you and send the next boy in.'

Slowly and painfully David stood, gingerly pulling up his trousers at the same
time. Without another word He left the Headmasters study. Turning to the boy standing
outside the Headmasters office David simply mumbled ' good luck, Ben.'

Thanks, I think I'll need it' replied His ashen faced friend who had heard, if not
seen David's Punishment. With that David made His way back to the dorm, changed into
His pyjamas and got into bed. As he lay on His stomach, desperately trying to soothe
His aching bottom with His hands David's mind, once more, turned back to home.

Days had gone by since he had opened that letter but not a word had been said
since on the subject of work or School. Then suddenly David's parents called Him into
the Kitchen for a family meeting about His future. He had to make the choice of
returning to School or finding a job. Without a moments hesitation, David chose the
latter. But His Father hadn't finished. If he chose to back to School it couldn't be
the local High School where He had so clearly failed. They had been looking into the
matter and had found a boarding School that had a special department for boys like
David, boys who have failed their A levels. A department that would help Him achieve
His full potential. They felt that as parents they had been too lenient with Him and
if He stayed at home He would be subjected to all the same temptations as before.
That was the choice He had to make, go out to work or Boarding School for a year.
Though taken by surprise by this latest development, there was no choice. David Chose
Boarding School.

With that David's Father produced a brochure for St Dunstans School for boys in
North Yorkshire. Miles away from home, it suddenly seemed all the more exciting,
almost like going to University, and hopefully with all the freedoms that that
entailed. However, as He began to read the brochure it soon became clear that this
was to be no picnic. It spoke of a strict academic regime and of firm discipline, of
rules that must be obeyed at all times and a strict uniform code. Worst of all, at
the bottom of the application form was a disclaimer to be signed by Himself and His
parents permitting the use of Corporal punishment if deemed necessary by the staff.
Well, it never did me any harm, said His Father and if you get your head down and do
as your told it shouldn't be a problem. Reluctantly, David signed.


Now, less than a week into His new school life David knew exactly what he had let
Himself in for. The work load was already massive, but not too difficult. And after
all, that is what He was here for. The strict, rigid daily routine with its high
emphasis on discipline and obedience, although at first a shock now seemed quite
normal and reassuring, allowing David to concentrate on His work. In fact, He
couldn't imagine life without it. The wealds now forming on His still sore backside
would serve a constant reminder for some days to come that He was at School to work
and that all rules were there to be obeyed.

A few moments later the Dormitory door opened and in walked Ben. David watched as
his friend slowly walked across the floor to the bed next to His. Without saying a
word Ben began to undress, carefully folding up His clothes and laying them on the
bedside chair in the manner set out in the School rules. Finally, Ben slowly removed
His trousers and white briefs trying to avoid any painful contact with the six
symmetrical lines that lay across beaten backside. David's cock stirred as he viewed
the sight on His friends, punishment. He wanted to reach out and touch the weald
marks clearly visible in the dim light of the Dormitory. For what seemed like an age
David stared at His friends caned orbs, a visual reminder of His own aching backside.
Then Ben, now fully naked turned round, revealing His own erect manhood in all its
glory. Without a word, David grabbed the throbbing member with His right hand and
guided it gently into His hungry mouth. His tongue greedily lapped the throbbing
dong resulting in groans of pleasure from the standing boy. Slowly, Ben pushed David
back onto the bed, His cock still firmly placed in His friends' mouth. As the two
boys lay side by side, Ben sought out David's own hot rod. For what seemed like an
age, there the boys lay, united in the ecstasy of hot boy cock being worked by a
willing mouth and the ever present burning sensation of a heavily caned arse.
Suddenly, Ben sprang up and pushed His partner onto His front, just in time for a
cry of sheer pleasure as His man juice poured onto the marked orbs of His friend.
Lovingly He then rubbed the sticky white fluid into David's warm flesh as if it were
a soothing balm. As soon as He was finished, Ben lay on His front allowing David to
reciprocate the act, which He did with sheer relish and pleasure. It was now just
before 9.30 pm and Ben quickly returned to His own bed; knowing that the rest of the
boys in their dorm would soon be arriving before lights out at 10.00pm. Before
falling into a peaceful sleep David's thoughts turned, once more, from the joy of
the last few moments, back to home.

Well, the decision had been made, and perhaps it wasn't as bad as it sounded
thought David. Anyway, the decision had been made and in due course He found himself
with His Mother at the School outfitters in Central London to buy the St Dunstans
School Uniform. A grey Blazer with red piping and the School crest on the pocket;
a pullover with matching piping; regulation grey shirts. It seemed a little old
fashioned and childish, but then everyone else would be wearing it, so David shrugged
His doubts aside. However, it was with horror that he faced the next items on the
list. Grey, regulation Short trousers; white briefs; long red socks for winter and
short red socks for summer.

'But I can't wear those' stammered David. 'I'll look stu
Mistress Day
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