Being Cuckolded
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cuck·old
| \ ˈkə-kəld
, -(ˌ)kōld \
cuckold
transitive verb
And also, for some reason, making his rusty BFF Mater a cuckold .
—
Devon Ivie, Vulture , 4 Oct. 2021
Tom is also a cuckold : Shiv is cheating on him with her ex Nate (Ashley Zukerman), a floppy-haired political operative.
—
Meredith Blake, chicagotribune.com , 12 Aug. 2019
Even Shakespeare and Chaucer cracked wise about cuckolds , who were often depicted wearing horns.
—
Carl Zimmer, New York Times , 8 Apr. 2016
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One of the more glaring inequities of the English language is that it has a significantly larger number of words for “a man whose wife is unfaithful” than it does for “a woman whose man is unfaithful.” Cuckold is perhaps the best known of these words, and it has many synonyms, including (but by no means restricted to) cornute , cornuto , hoddy-doddy , hoddypoll , horn , ram , and wittol (a man who is aware of his wife’s infidelity and acquiesces to it). What of a woman whose husband is unfaithful? For that our language appears to have but a single word, and an obscure one at that: cuckquean .
These example sentences are selected automatically from various online news sources to reflect current usage of the word 'cuckold.' Views expressed in the examples do not represent the opinion of Merriam-Webster or its editors. Send us feedback .
13th century, in the meaning defined above
“Cuckold.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary , Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cuckold. Accessed 10 Sep. 2022.
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From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This is the latest accepted revision , reviewed on 7 September 2022 .
This article is about the term. For the 1997 novel by Kiran Nagarkar, see Cuckold (novel) . For the 2015 South African film, see Cuckold (film) .
^ Steven M. Platek; Todd K. Shackelford, eds. (2006). Female Infidelity and Paternal Uncertainty: Evolutionary Perspectives on Male Anti-Cuckoldry Tactics . New York: Cambridge University Press . ISBN 9781139458047 .
^ Davidson, Thomas. "Whitlow to Wyvern" . Chambers's Twentieth Century Dictionary 1908 .
^ "Online Etymology Dictionary" . Retrieved 19 December 2016 .
^ Jump up to: a b c Williams, Janet (4 July 2009). "Cuckolds, Horns and Other Explanations" . BBC News . Retrieved 11 February 2013 .
^ Geoffrey Hughes (26 March 2015). An Encyclopedia of Swearing: The Social History of Oaths, Profanity, Foul Language, and Ethnic Slurs in the English-speaking World . Taylor & Francis. pp. 191–. ISBN 978-1-317-47677-1 .
^ Coleman, Julie (1 January 1999). Love, Sex, and Marriage: A Historical Thesaurus . Rodopi. ISBN 9042004339 . Retrieved 22 November 2016 – via Google Books.
^ Williams, Gordon (13 September 2001). A Dictionary of Sexual Language and Imagery in Shakespearean and Stuart Literature: Three Volume Set Volume I A-F Volume II G-P Volume III Q-Z . A&C Black. ISBN 9780485113938 . Retrieved 22 November 2016 – via Google Books.
^ Oxford English Dictionary
^ Stack, Liam (August 15, 2017). "Alt-Right, Alt-Left, Antifa: A Glossary of Extremist Language" . The New York Times .
^ E. Cobham Brewer 1810–1897. Dictionary of Phrase and Fable. 1898.
^ LaGuardia, David P. (2008). Intertextual Masculinity in French Renaissance Literature . Franham, UK: Ashgate Publishing. p. 133.
^ Sommer, Matthew Harvey (2002). Sex, Law, and Society in Late Imperial China . Stanford: Stanford University Press. p. 218. ISBN 0-8047-4559-5 . Retrieved 2008-07-27 .
^ Brian Joseph Levy (2000). The Comic Text: Patterns and Images in the Old French Fabliaux . ISBN 9042004290 .
^ William Beck (December 1968). "Arnolphe or Monsieur de la Souche?". The French Review . 42 (2): 255. JSTOR 386804 .
^ Oxford English Dictionary (3rd ed.). 2010.
^ John Stephen Farmer (1903). Slang and Its Analogues Past and Present . Subscribers only. p. 15.
^ Sallo, Ibrahim Khidhir. "A Sociolinguistic Study of Sex Differences in Mosuli Arabic in Mosul-Iraq."
^ Shahawi, Majdi Muhammad Ash (2004). Marital Discord - Causes & Cures . Darussalam Publishers.
^ Semerdjian, Elyse (2012-03-01). " 'Because he is so tender and pretty': sexual deviance and heresy in eighteenth-century Aleppo". Social Identities . 18 (2): 175–199. doi : 10.1080/13504630.2012.652844 . ISSN 1350-4630 . S2CID 145004098 .
^ Hamamra, Bilal Tawfiq (2018-04-03). "The Containment of Female Linguistic, Spatial, and Sexual Transgression in Arden of Faversham: A Contemporary Palestinian Reading" . Comparative Literature: East & West . 2 (2): 88–100. doi : 10.1080/25723618.2018.1546474 . ISSN 2572-3618 .
^ Elizabeth Weiss (2017-08-09). "The Cuckolding Fetish Explained: Why Some Men Actually *Want* to Be Cheated On" . Marie Claire Magazine . Retrieved 2022-06-27 .
^ Calhoun, Ada (2012-09-14). "You May Call It Cheating, but We Don't" . The New York Times . ISSN 0362-4331 . Retrieved 2022-06-27 .
^ Ley, David (2009). Insatiable Wives: Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them . Rowman & Littlefield. ISBN 978-1-4422-0031-9 .
^ Jump up to: a b Kort, Joe (13 September 2016). "The Expanding Phenomenon Of Cuckolding: Even Gay Men Are Getting Into It" . Huffington Post . Retrieved 19 December 2016 .
^ Harris, Lynn (5 September 2007). "What do you call a female cuckold?" . Salon . Retrieved 19 December 2016 .
^ Klein, Donald C. (1 Dec 1999). "The humiliation dynamic: An overview". The Journal of Primary Prevention . 12 (2): 93–121. doi : 10.1007/BF02015214 . PMID 24258218 . S2CID 43535241 .
^ Rufus, Anneli (July 29, 2010). "The Intellectual Sex Fetish" . The Daily Beast . Retrieved November 20, 2021 .
^ Betchen, Stephen J. (November 18, 2014). "Sexually Dominant Women and the Men Who Desire Them, Part II" . Magnetic Partners blog post . Psychology Today . Cuckolding can also be mixed with other non-monogamous relationship arrangements with which it has substantial overlap such as swinging, open relationships, and polyamory. Again, it is distinguished from these concepts in that cuckold's thrill in their partner's acts is specifically masochistic
^ Baumeister, Roy (2014). Masochism and the Self . New York: Psychology Press. ISBN 978-1138876064 .
A cuckold is the husband of an adulterous wife; the wife of an adulterous husband is a cuckquean . In biology , a cuckold is a male who unwittingly invests parental effort in juveniles who are not genetically his offspring. [1] A husband who is aware of and tolerates his wife's infidelity is sometimes called a wittol or wittold . [2]
The word cuckold derives from the cuckoo bird, alluding to its habit of laying its eggs in other birds' nests. [3] [4] The association is common in medieval folklore , literature, and iconography .
English usage first appears about 1250 in the medieval debate poem The Owl and the Nightingale . It was characterized as an overtly blunt term in John Lydgate 's "Fall of Princes", c. 1440 . [5] Shakespeare's writing often referred to cuckolds, with several of his characters suspecting they had become one. [4]
The word often implies that the husband is deceived; that he is unaware of his wife's unfaithfulness and may not know until the arrival or growth of a child plainly not his (as with cuckoo birds). [4]
The female equivalent cuckquean first appears in English literature in 1562, [6] [7] adding a female suffix to the cuck .
A related word, first appearing in 1520, is wittol , which substitutes wit (in the sense of knowing) for the first part of the word, referring to a man aware of and reconciled to his wife's infidelity . [8]
An abbreviation of cuckold , the term cuck has been used by the alt-right to attack the masculinity of an opponent. It was originally aimed at other conservatives , whom the alt-right saw as "insufficiently committed to racism and anti-Semitism", according to The New York Times . [9]
In Western traditions, cuckolds have sometimes been described as "wearing the horns of a cuckold" or just "wearing the horns". This is an allusion to the mating habits of stags , who forfeit their mates when they are defeated by another male. [10]
In Italy (especially in Southern Italy , where it is a major personal offence), the insult " cornuto " is often accompanied by the sign of the horns . In French , the term is " porter des cornes ". In German, the term is " jemandem Hörner aufsetzen ", or " Hörner tragen ", the husband is " der gehörnte Ehemann ".
In Brazil and Portugal, the term used is " corno ", meaning exactly "horned". The term is quite offensive, especially for men, and cornos are a common subject of jokes and anecdotes.
Rabelais 's Tiers Livers of Gargantua and Pantagruel (1546) portrays a horned fool as a cuckold. [11] In Molière 's L'École des femmes (1662), a man named Arnolphe (see below) who mocks cuckolds with the image of the horned buck ( becque cornu ) becomes one at the end.
In Chinese usage, the cuckold (or wittol) is said to be " 戴綠帽子 " dài lǜmàozi , translated into English as 'wearing the green hat'. The term is an allusion to the sumptuary laws used from the 13th to the 18th centuries that required males in households with prostitutes to wrap their heads in a green scarf (or later a hat). [12]
A saint Arnoul(t), Arnolphe, or Ernoul, possibly Arnold of Soissons , is often cited as the patron saint of cuckolded husbands, hence the name of Molière's character Arnolphe. [13] [14]
The Greek hero Actaeon is often associated with cuckoldry, as when he is turned into a stag, he becomes "horned". [15] This is alluded to in Shakespeare's Merry Wives , Robert Burton 's Anatomy of Melancholy , and others. [16]
In Islamic cultures, the related term dayouth ( Arabic : دَيُّوث ) can be used to describe person who is viewed as apathetic or permissive with regards to unchaste behaviour by female relatives or a spouse, or who lacks the demeanor ( ghayrah ) of paternalistic protectiveness. [17] [18] Variations on the spelling include dayyuth , dayuuth , or dayoos. [19] The term has been criticised for its use as a pejorative while also suggestive of acceptance of vain paternalistic gender roles, stigmatization of sexuality or overprotective intrusive sexual gatekeeping. [20]
Unlike the traditional definition of the term, in fetish usage a cuckold (also known as "cuckolding fetish") [21] [22] is complicit in their partner's sexual "infidelity"; the wife who enjoys "cuckolding" her husband is called a "cuckoldress" if the man is more submissive. [23] [ page needed ] [24] [25] The dominant man engaging with the cuckold's partner is called a "bull". [24]
If a couple can keep the fantasy in the bedroom, or come to an agreement where being cuckolded in reality does not damage the relationship, they may try it out in reality. However, the primary proponent of the fantasy is almost always the one being humiliated, or the "cuckold": the cuckold convinces his lover to participate in the fantasy for them, though other "cuckolds" may prefer their lover to initiate the situation instead. The fetish fantasy does not work at all if the cuckold is being humiliated against their will. [26]
Psychology regards cuckold fetishism as a variant of masochism , the cuckold deriving pleasure from being humiliated. [27] [28] In his book Masochism and the Self, psychologist Roy Baumeister advanced a Self Theory analysis that cuckolding (or specifically, all masochism) was a form of escaping from self-awareness, at times when self-awareness becomes burdensome, such as with perceived inadequacy. According to this theory, the physical or mental pain from masochism brings attention away from the self, which would be desirable in times of "guilt, anxiety, or insecurity", or at other times when self-awareness is unpleasant. [29]
https://www.thefreedictionary.com/cuckolded
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A man whose spouse or romantic partner is unfaithful.
[Middle English cokewald , from Anglo-Norman *cucuald , from cucu , the cuckoo , from Vulgar Latin *cuccūlus , from Latin cucūlus .]
Word History: The allusion to the cuckoo on which the word cuckold is based may not be appreciated by those unfamiliar with the nesting habits of certain varieties of this bird. The female of some cuckoos lays its eggs in the nests of other birds, leaving them to be cared for by the resident nesters. This parasitic tendency has given the female bird a figurative reputation for unfaithfulness as well. Hence in Old French we find the word cucuault, composed of cocu, "cuckoo, cuckold," and the pejorative suffix -ald, used to designate a husband whose wife has wandered afield like the female cuckoo. An earlier assumed form of the Old French word was borrowed into Middle English by way of Anglo-Norman. Middle English cokewold, the ancestor of Modern English cuckold, is first recorded in a work written around 1250.
American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fifth Edition. Copyright © 2016 by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. Published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. All rights reserved.
a man whose spouse has committed adultery, often regarded as an object of scorn
[C13 cukeweld, from Old French cucuault, from cucu cuckoo; perhaps an allusion to the parasitic cuckoos that lay their eggs in the nests of other birds]
Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged, 12th Edition 2014 © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003, 2006, 2007, 2009, 2011, 2014
1. the husband of an unfaithful wife.
2. to make a cuckold of (a husband).
[1200–50; Middle English cukeweld, later cok(k)ewold, cukwold < Anglo-French *cucuald ]
Random House Kernerman Webster's College Dictionary, © 2010 K Dictionaries Ltd. Copyright 2005, 1997, 1991 by Random House, Inc. All rights reserved.
Collins English Verb Tables © HarperCollins Publishers 2011
Thesaurus Antonyms Related Words Synonyms Legend:
hubby , husband , married man - a married man; a woman's partner in marriage
wittol - an archaic term for a cuckold who knows about his wife's infidelity but tolerates it
cozen , deceive , delude , lead on - be false to; be dishonest with
two-time - carry on a romantic relationship with two people at the same time
play around , fool around - commit adultery; "he plays around a lot"
Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2012 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.
bedriegen de hoorns opzetten hoorndrager onder de kluiten schieten
Collins Spanish Dictionary - Complete and Unabridged 8th Edition 2005 © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1971, 1988 © HarperCollins Publishers 1992, 1993, 1996, 1997, 2000, 2003, 2005
Collins German Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged 7th Edition 2005. © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1980 © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1997, 1999, 2004, 2005, 2007
Collins Italian Dictionary 1st Edition © HarperCollins Publishers 1995
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