Bdsm Shock Collar
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Bdsm Shock Collar
Shock Collars in BDSM - Fun and Safe?
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Shock Collars in BDSM - Fun and Safe?
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We’ve been playing with shock collars for a few years now, and it’s become one of my favorite pieces of gear. We feel that shock collars are an underutilized toy in BDSM, and I’m pretty sure that’s because they have a bad PR campaign.
When we first started exploring the idea of shock collars, there simply wasn’t any good advice out there. It seemed like all the information we found was overwhelmingly negative, and full of cautionary tales about what “could” and “might” happen but no evidence that a single person has ever been harmed. Even now, on sites like Fetlife where things get really weird, you’ll mostly find advice that warns of the dangers of shock collars- which is hilarious coming from people who do things like catheterize themselves right before they poop their diapers for funsies.. but, I don’t judge.
If you look closely at the people handing out all the free warnings and advice on shock collar safety, you’ll note that they never have any actual experience with them. For whatever reason certain people just can’t tolerate not having an answer for something BDSM related, so they declare shock collars to be sophisticated killing machines, then work backwards with made up sci fi worthy scenarios to prove their opinion. I think all these people get their advice from the same place because the exact same warnings show up over and over again, and they have no basis in reality.
A solid example was one person on Twitter (I know big surprise right?) that was in the medical field, but not a doctor and went on a big pseudo-science rant about why they thought shock collars were dangerous. Despite this person also did posts on encouraging breathplay with almost no warnings, many still were convinced this was proof to be worried about shock collars forever. It was just another case of “my kink is safe because I think it is hot, but other kinks are dangerous, because I’m not into it” mentality we see time and time again. Fortunately this post and account are no longer on Twitter, but the rumor still lives on much like how many people were convinced vaccines were causing autism based on one trash study.
Even the BDSM pros have some concerns about shock collars. An example of this was the time we were getting ready to do a shoot with one producer a bit ago. Naturally, we wanted to include the shock collar, but we noticed some hesitation about it when discussing the plan for the shoot. Their concern was a bit comical to us as this producer had done plenty of heavy electric scenes and breathplay scenes, yet somehow shock collars were going to be the line not to cross. In the end, they were fine with the shock collar for the shoot, and of course I blame any hesitation on all the bad press shock collars get in general. Luckily logic prevailed and it turned out to be a really fun trip!!!
So here we are after years of playing with shock collars, selling them, designing, testing and perfecting the leather collars and belt, and even collaborating on a shocking cock cage design, and the bad advice and dire warnings are still going strong. Clearly there's a need for an article to answer some general questions and dispel some of the myths surrounding shock collars, so that’s what I hope to do.
HOW WE GOT INTERESTED IN SHOCK COLLARS Believe it or not, there was a time in my BDSM journey when any and all electrical play was a hard limit. I had discussed this with Sir very early on in our relationship when we were setting up limits, so that activity was off the table and it never came up again.
As the years went on our relationship matured, and trust was built. I found myself more open to trying some activities that I never would have in the past because Sir had proven himself to be trustworthy and responsible. Shock collars just kinda came up in conversation as we explored other fetishes that were new ideas to us at the time like chastity belts and slut prison. I don’t think either one of us had this as a secret shock collar fetish or anything, it just kind of organically developed like the rest of our fetish problems.
Shortly after becoming interested in this fetish is when we first noted the lack of any reasonable advice out there. For a while I was actually a bit concerned and wasn’t sure this was a good idea because there were a lot more warnings than there were fun happy stories. As with most sexytime ideas, Sir did all the legwork like sorting out what particular unit would be a good one for us then tested it on himself in order to decide what location to wear it. Then he went through and solved all the potential problems like how to mod the pokey prongs that would be uncomfortable on a human neck. He always works out all the details so I’m pretty spoiled in that regard. Any sexytime idea that I think up or show interest in- he makes it happen. If there’s gear for it - he’ll find the best options, and if the gear doesn’t exist - he’ll make it or find someone who can. His attention to detail means that all the problems have been thought of and solved so even though I had some low key worries about it, it was easy to be all YOLO when it came time to play because he already tested everything thoroughly and I trust him completely.
Needless to say I immediately loved the collar and it was even more fun than I had fantasized about. There has always been a pretty strong obedience training, ritual, and protocol theme in my kinks, so the shock collar really added to that. It’s hot to me that the corrections are instant and I have no choice but to comply. For some reason the convenience of the remote is hot to me too- Sir being able to get whatever he wants with minimal effort is really sexy. I also find that the anticipation of knowing I could be shocked at any time is pretty hot, and keeps me very focused on whatever task I’ve been given. It definitely keeps me feeling submissive, and it's a hot concept that Sir has absolute control of me from anywhere in the room and can correct me without touching me, and of course there’s something sexy and objectifying about being denied touching even during a correction.
After it was clear that the shock collar was a theme that’s going to be around for awhile the idea of pussy shocks became a thing. That’s when Sir made me a leather shock belt and we started experimenting with using both neck and pussy shocks at the same time. When using a multi-channel shock unit this can add control depth where one can switch between controlling just the collar or the belt to hone in corrections; alternatively just go straight with having the units set to the same channel for double the motivation. If really living it up, this feature also allows other fun ideas like controlling two different sluts with shock collars using only one remote.
We also found that the shock belt opened up an option for some discreet public play. I’m pretty ‘meh’ on public play in general because it’s shitty to include others in your sexytime, but wearing the shock belt under a dress is subtle and feels sexy and it doesn't have to be some dramatic event because the level can be set very low. It's a fun little side quest to have while going out shopping together. Compared to portable e-stim options of the past, we appreciated how shock units intended for dogs were self contained without having to worry about a bunch of wire management.
More recently I have been exploring my Domme side and I’ve found the shock unit is a very helpful tool for being bossy as well. It gives me confidence to know I can get compliance and I don’t have to worry about a bunch of man handling and impact play. Cock cages now seem hot to me, so naturally I wanted a shock unit incorporated. Thankfully, we were able to encourage Kink3D to make a ring variant for their Cobra cage that can accommodate a shock unit and that's been super perfect and a big source of inspiration for my bossy thoughts.
HOW DOES IT ACTUALLY FEEL? My main concern about shock collars in the beginning was the level of pain because I’m not a masochist. Too much pain gets old real fast when you're not a masochist. I figured that a shock collar would hurt pretty bad even on low, but that is not the case. I was surprised that even on high it’s not the kind of pain you get from impact play so I can definitely recommend shock collar play for anyone- even those who are not into much pain. I think it's a tolerable kind of discomfort because the pain is over as soon as the shock stops, and it doesn't make you sore or cause bruises like a good physical beating might, but at the same time it forces cooperation as effectively as some slapping around does.
Of course the amount of pain felt depends on the shock level, the location and the unit you're using, but there is no residual pain after the shock is over. It just kind of happens then it's done and you move on. Shock collar play is largely psychological and that’s what makes it really sexy. There’s a lot more time spent anticipating than actually suffering, and the suffering only has to be as bad as you agree upon.
I would describe the shock itself as a very localized static shock. You don’t feel it course through your body like the kind of shock you would get from bumping up against an electric fence, and I think that's what most people envision before they try it.
Depending on the level of the unit it can feel like a buzz/tickle on the lowest setting, then it progresses to a static shock feeling or a strong rubber band snap on a medium setting and then at the highest levels it feels like a sharp pinch or a bite.
Brands vary, but on the Dogtra remote there's a button for a vibration, and one for a quick zap called a nick, and a button for a prolonged constant shock. The nick and the constant shock feel quite a bit different. Even if both are set at the same intensity level, the constant shock always feels stronger and has a throbbing sensation added to it.
We use the different buttons for commands- the vibration can be used as a warning or as a suck command.. It's easy to get creative with it.
I noticed that during play the amount of shock that feels sexy might change. For example, I found that I was eventually able to tolerate 100(max) on the small unit (Dogtra IQ) and I could kinda power through it for awhile if deep in subspace and wanting to continue sucking cock even after given the command to stop, but we have since upgraded to some units for larger dogs and there's no way I can power through those, but my point is that you might be surprised at what you can tolerate once you start having fun with it.
Now I’ll answer some of the greatest hits that we see over and over again:
…BUT IS IT SAFE? First of all, nothing is 100% “safe” in life let alone in BDSM. There’s a certain amount of risk you’re going to take in any BDSM endeavor and that’s why the Safe, Sane, Consensual guidelines are recognized as the gold standard for BDSM play. Some activities are inherently more dangerous than others and require more caution but no matter what you want to try it can be evaluated through the SSC guidelines to make it as safe as possible.
That said, just a little bit of common sense goes a long way when trying to decide if the collars are safe enough to try. The most obvious thing to point out is that it doesn’t kill 5lb dogs (or any dogs for that matter), so it’s logical to assume that it won’t kill humans either. ZERO dogs have been killed by shocks from a shock collar. You can certainly find examples of evil people that put a shock collar on a dog and never take it off resulting in pressure sores that can lead to infections and all sorts of problems, but I struggled to find those examples as relevant because the scenarios that caused the dogs to be harmed (wearing the collar very tight 24/7 for months at a time) fall outside of SSC guidelines that would be used for BDSM play and it becomes a moot point. I was looking for examples of severe injury to dogs, but my main takeaway from looking up the dangers is that most articles against using shock collars are ethical in nature and based on someone's personal feelings that shocks are cruel. There's no evidence that when used as intended during the course of training that any injury occurs.
As far as proof of safety on humans goes, I’ve probably spent more time in a shock collar than an actual dog being trained, and I have survived without any notable injuries to speak of. Discerning Specialist, Fancy Steel, PiShock, and even bigger general sex toy companies have been offering shock collar options for years now with no sign of serious injury or related complaints.
If you need even more examples of people surviving the use of shock collars you can google “shock collar challenge” and you will see a bunch of Tiktoks finest shocking each other for funsies and likes. These are the same idiots who do things like the “tide pod challenge” and disregard all safety concerns and still nobody died from the shock collars. I wouldn't take this as proof of safety but we can discern right away that a lot of stupid people tried it without any pre planning and nothing of consequence happened as a result. Add that to the fact that zero dogs have died from shock collar use, and we can safely take death off the table as a possible outcome. Already, that makes shock collars safer than rope bondage.
Like I said, I’ve logged a lot of time in my collars and I’ve not had any problems beyond some localized skin irritation or a sensitive spot on my skin where the prongs were after a particularly aggressive session. I get sore spots from regular bondage so I would call that par for the course.
I’ve not seen any evidence to show that anyone has ever been injured by a shock collar, and I’m definitely not the only person in the world to play with them during sexy time. It’s strange to me that even though nobody has suffered any injuries we still like to add a bunch of made up warnings - just in case. People get hurt from more common BDSM activities like rope or breathplay on a daily basis, but for some reason the people who fear monger shock collars don’t have anything to say to those groups.
WHERE ON THE BODY TO WEAR IT Even if you’re able to find someone that agrees that shock collars are generally safe to use, this is the part of the conversation where things fly off the rails because everyone has very strong opinions on the most “safe” location to wear it and nearly all of these people haven’t touched one in real life.. The truth is that you can wear it anywhere on the body that you want and the result will be the same. As long as the contact points are touching the skin, the local area will get a superficial shock and that’s it. That’s how it works. You can shock a little or shock a lot and no matter where you put it- it just shocks the surface and everyone survives.
When we started, Sir and experimented a bit to see where it would make the most sense to wear and eventually we settled on the back of the neck. Wearing it this way means the unit stays out of the way and there’s no restriction to neck movement that's needed for valuable tasks like cock sucking. Having the unit out of the way and in the back means you can have a traditional d-ring in the front for a leash or a connection point which we find to be essential for play.
That said- if you want it on the front of the neck then that’s fine too. There are no additional safety warnings besides eventual sore muscles or skin irritation if you wear it on the front of the neck. I just wanted to point out how we use it as a starting point.
If looking for the most reaction, the side of the neck is the way to go. Mounting on the front or back of the neck will dodge most muscles, however the side mount will consistently activate muscles on that side of the neck. This adds some intensity combining an involuntary jerking feeling to the static shock. As with any e-stim use, activating any muscles a lot is essentially giving them a work out so considerations should be made. It won’t lead to serious injury, but having a zone of sore overworked neck muscles can be a result with heavy use.
“NEVER USE IT NEAR OR OVER THE HEART” This is the most frequently used “safety” advice I see. I can’t think of a scenario where you would use a shock unit directly over the heart, but maybe I’m old fashioned. Either way, SSC guidelines would render this a moot point because it’s not sane considering shock collars are normally worn on the neck. (Which is where the majority of people use it), but let's just go along with this and pretend shocking your heart is a thing people want to do and I’ll walk you through the reasons why this warning is 100% bullshit.
As I may have mentioned before, I'm an RN. I’ve been a part of my fair share of code blues and a lot of times it was just general CPR and pushing meds but sometimes we had to defibrillate. The kind of electricity it takes to get through all the muscle, tissue, and bone to get to the heart can only be described as … violent. To give you an idea of the strength of this shock - if someone is accidentally leaning on the patient or if any part of the nurse is touching metal on the bed when they give the shock, they will get a shock thats equivalent to getting kicked by a mule. Hence the reason they yell “clear” before shocking. As strong as it is, even THAT level of electricity is not always enough to shock the patient’ heart into a regular rhythm and it often has to be turned up and tried again. Bottom line- It takes a LOT of power to shock the heart enough to affect it. Much more than a shock collar has to offer on its best day.
Another random tidbit of info that people don’t usually know is that you never shock a patient who flat lines. That's only on tv. You never shock someone who doesn't have a heartbeat because the defibrillator only works to reset a heart that already has some electrical activity going on and it's just in a bad rhythm. I mention this because this speaks to the effect that electricity has on stopping or starting the heart.
If shock collars could possibly affect the heart in a way to disrupt your rhythm, then cardiologists would want you to have one on hand in case of emergencies because they are a hell of a lot cheaper than a
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