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Asshole Bbc
Sadia says the public nature of her ordeal has left her unwilling to leave her home
The four suspects are in custody, and their trial has begun
How the crime came to light: Tahir Imran Mian, Social Media editor, BBC Urdu
A Pakistani rape victim says she has been forced to seek justice after the rapists filmed and released the video of the act online
When a young Pakistani woman was gang raped in a remote village, she kept silent. But then a video of the rape began circulating online and via mobile phone. As BBC Urdu's Amber Shamsi reports, little appears to have been done to stop web users from sharing the video.
Sadia (not her real name) had thought that if she kept quiet, it might protect her from the humiliation of being known as a rape victim.
But in the days or weeks after, two versions of her ordeal began to circulate online - one lasted five minutes, the other 40 minutes.
The video showed her being raped by four men, one by one, while she pleaded for mercy. It spread rapidly through the towns and villages of Punjab.
"It was my elder brother who first told me about the video. He saw it and recognised Sadia, then came to me," Sadia's father says.
"She felt too ashamed to tell me because I'm her father. If her mother had been alive, I'm sure my daughter would have told her."
They then reported the rape, and it was easy to find the alleged culprits in that small community.
It was shared largely through Bluetooth and clips have reportedly made it on to social media websites such as Facebook.
It can still be shared. Pakistan does not have the laws to stop this from happening.
Sadia lives in a typical Pakistani village, with mud homes surrounded by fields of sugarcane and small vegetable gardens.
She is 23 but she looks much younger. Since her mother died, she has been a surrogate mother to her younger siblings.
Sadia is nervous as she speaks, clasping and unclasping her hands, breaking down and re-composing herself.
She says she was on her way to the market to buy her sister's school uniform when she was bundled into a car and threatened with a gun. She claims the four men in the car took her to a house and raped her while filming the act on a mobile phone.
"After I begged and pleaded with them, they beat me even more," she says. "They said to me that if I don't listen to them and do what they want, they'll show everyone the video, put it up on the internet, that they would hurt my brothers and sister.
"I didn't care about myself but I didn't want my siblings' future to be in jeopardy because of me. That's why I didn't tell anyone."
She is acutely aware the video is now being watched widely.
"A lot of people are watching this video for fun, they see it as something interesting."
When I came face to face with the four accused men in the police station where they were being held on remand, they hung their heads to avoid our gaze. They are currently in jail and the trial is under way.
As well as being prosecuted for gang-rape and kidnap, they have also been charged with distributing pornography for which the penalty is three months in jail.
The video is still online although police say they have been trying to get it removed. As far as the gang-rape is concerned, police say that with the video, the case is strong
But this is also a story that underscores how Pakistan's legal system has been unable to keep pace with rapid changes in society and technology.
Lawyers specialising in cyber crime say there is no specific law to force websites to take down the video, and a lack of political will and manpower means this could still be some way off.
A comprehensive cyber-crime ordinance was allowed to lapse four years ago before it could become law.
So local police and federal agents adopt a piecemeal approach when confronted with a crime like the filming and sharing of a video containing sexual violence and invoke laws pertaining to sexual harassment, defamation or criminal intimidation or basic clauses on violation of privacy gleaned from an old law called the Electronic Transactions Ordinance (ETO).
Under a new cyber-crime law (yet to be enacted by parliament), the punishment for distributing sexually explicit material will be three years - whether or not it involves violence which is dealt with under separate laws - and violation of privacy is also three years
A deputy director-general with the central Federal Investigation Agency which covers cyber crime, Shehzad Haider, says he gets about 12 to 15 cases of private videos of a sexual nature being uploaded a month - by jilted lovers and blackmailing gangs - and the numbers appear to be increasing.
"The law which was allowed to lapse was very effective because it was detailed and made the job of prosecution much easier," says Mr Haider. "We make do with the ETO because we have no choice."
Sadia has no choice either. She is now house-bound because of the shame of the public nature of her ordeal. She used to be a primary-school teacher and had been in further study.
"Some of my college professors visited me and encouraged me to complete my studies," she says.
"They say I should put it behind me, but I can't. Not until the men are punished."
"I have something to share with you and I hope the BBC can help the victim." That was the message attached to a video from a reader of the BBC Urdu Facebook page.
It is one the biggest and most followed pages in Pakistan and a huge number of people reach out to us for help. We are often sent graphic material, but I felt numb after seeing the shocking video so decided to investigate.
After a few phone calls and conversations, it dawned on me that people were watching and sharing this. I then found that many men in the area where the attack took place thought it was "fun" to share and watch the video.
There are several closed groups on Facebook where men can share images. Those who have access to tools and technology can take it further and blackmail victims. A mobile phone with a camera is cheap and so are the opportunities it provides to many who knowingly or unknowingly record their videos and then share them.
The victim often ends up being the one stigmatised.
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Elon Musk's transgender daughter has applied to legally change her name and gender, saying she no longer wants to "be related to my biological father in any way, shape or form".
The 18-year-old has asked to be recognised as female and have the name Vivian Jenna Wilson.
She was known as Xavier Alexander Musk.
The petition for both a name change and a new birth certificate was filed with the Los Angeles County Superior Court in Santa Monica.
Her request is set out in court documents filed in April, which have only recently come to light.
There was no further detail of the apparent rift between Mr Musk's daughter and her father.
The Tesla and SpaceX entrepreneur has yet to comment.
Mr Musk was married to Vivian's mother, Canadian author Justine Wilson, from 2000 until they divorced in 2008.
Their first son, Nevada, was born in 2002, and died of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) at 10 weeks.
The pair went on to have twin sons called Xavier and Griffin and triplet boys - Damian, Kai and Saxon.
He has two other children, X Æ A-Xii and Exa Dark Sideræl - who goes by Y - with singer Grimes, with whom he has had an on-off relationship.
His children have kept a relatively low profile despite their father's fame.
On Father's Day, the entrepreneur tweeted that he loves all his children.
There has been no comment from Mr Musk about his daughter's decision to distance herself from him.
He has been vocal on various transgender issues, and has been branded anti-gay in several rows. Last year he complained about people using their own pronouns.
The court document for his daughter's name and gender change was filed a month before he publicly declared his support for the Republican Party, having previously voted Democrat.
He has also said he is a fan of Ron DeSantis, the Republican Florida governor who introduced the so-called "Don't Say Gay" bill. This controversial piece of legislation restricts schools from teaching students about sexual orientation and gender issues, with teachers opening themselves up to lawsuits should they fail to comply.
In 2020 Elon Musk wrote on Twitter "Pronouns suck" before deleting it. He then said: "I absolutely support trans, but all these pronouns are an aesthetic nightmare."
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© 2022 BBC. The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read about our approach to external linking.

https://www.thebody.com/article/anal-intercourse-aftercare
When it comes to anal sex, we often discuss preparation (aka the three Ds: dieting, douching, dilating), but we rarely mention what to do after engaging in anal sex. As fantastic as it is, anal sex can be traumatic to the body. If we engage regularly, we need to know how to properly care for the area before, during, and after the fun is said and done.
“Anal sex is a high-pressured act with significant forces at play, all of which can be quite traumatic,” Evan Goldstein, D.O., CEO of Bespoke Surgical, a medical and wellness practice for queer men, tells TheBody. “The anal cavity encompasses skin, muscles, and blood vessels, each of which can be restrictive and limiting. What that means is if someone goes beyond their capacity (i.e., their hole is opened up too wide or with too much force), any of these components can tear or develop other complications.”
The bum doesn’t self-lubricate like the vagina, and, since spit doesn’t contain the proper lubricity to ease penetration, one must invest in a quality lube (and lots of it) for a more pleasurable sexual experience and to prevent injury.
I favor a thick, water-based lubricant or silicone lube for anal sex, and applying it to the penis or toy, the b-hole, and inside the hole, since penetration often reaches deeper than the rim area. Lube can be applied with a finger (which makes for great foreplay) or, if your toy or partner is large, a lube injector . You can even play with a lubricated toy to both lube and dilate your hole before the action begins.
Goldstein says “overaggressive anal douching” (i.e., douching with too much water or force) and the angle of the top and bottom’s pelvises are additional factors to consider. “Some people like to get creative with complex sexual positions (which are fine, but only once everyone is comfortable) or they’re simply too aggressive when they’re thrusting before the bottom has opened up,” Goldstein explains. “Unfortunately, there are many variables to think about that can increase the chances of potential anal injury—and they all need to be taken into consideration to minimize possible complications.”
Some people, such as myself , favor CBD suppositories when planning for longer, more intense sessions. These rocket-shaped pills ease inflammation and help relax the area––whether a bum or vagina––prior to intercourse. Some CBD oils offer similar benefits.
Whatever you do, do not use numbing lubricants. These have a reputation of masking pain, which is your body’s way of telling you to stop and reassess the situation. “It’s also going to numb his cock as well, which could result in you getting fucked for a very long time and further irritate the area,” adult actor Dallas Steele adds.
After you’ve bottomed, the area will be more sensitive than usual, so run a nice warm bath, spill in some Epsom salts, and bliss TF out. The warm water and Epsom salts will quell the area and relax your muscles. This makes for an opportune time to replay those sexy moments in your mind and clean the area. While a gentle soap will do the trick, you can be extra and purchase a bum exfoliator to clean and buff your booty hole. If you’re still feeling a little raw after your bath, pop an ibuprofen to help with inflammation.
“If, after four hours, you discover going number-two hurts, try using CBD oil, an anal numbing solution, or just regular dental numbing gel like Anbesol,” Steele recommends. “This will lessen the pain while your hole recovers from the pounding.”
After you’ve pooped, inspect the stool for blood. A little bleeding can be expected from time to time, but excessive pain, bleeding, or discharge should not, and you may want to consult a physician.
If you witness any of these symptoms, abstain from anal intercourse until they’re gone. This can take anywhere from a few days to a week to heal. In the meantime, take some Metamucil before bed, and drink plenty of water, so bowel movements are as smooth as possible, and take a sitz bath three to four times a day to keep the area clean. For good measure, use this time to consider how things can be done more carefully next time.
Moving forward, you may also want to reevaluate how you clean your bum after a bowel movement, since wet wipes are no good for your rear, especially if you engage in regular anal intercourse. Due to their ingredients, their moisture, and their material, wet wipes can irritate and even infect your precious booty hole .
Toilet paper can be similarly abrasive, especially when you wipe instead of blot. That’s why you should be using a bidet. They’re a bottom’s best friend and offer a spa-like experience for your tuffet.
To keep your hole in tip-top shape, do some Kegels to tighten your pelvic floor and teach your hole some new tricks. Just insert a toy into your bum, flex, and repeat—it’s as simple as that. Additionally, many adult actors swear by vitamin E to keep their holes camera-ready. Dolf Dietrich , who is no stranger to a gangbang, applies vitamin E oil once per day, both in and around his hole.
Some bum injuries require surgery. At Bespoke Surgical, the most common injury is an anal fissure, a tear in the skin that’s incredibly painful. Other potential consequences could be dilated veins (hemorrhoids), skin tag development (residual hemorrhoids or scarring from tears), anal infections (abscesses), and/or the development of an infected tunnel (anal fistula). All of these can be treated—just make sure you see a sex-positive, queer-friendly doctor who is knowledgeable about the bum.
As you can see, there are a lot of things to consider even after you’ve had butt sex. While these suggestions may not be as important as the planning––Steele insists, “The key to not being sore or even hurting after sex is to be prepared before, and to know your limits and experience level”––anal aftercare is good practice. We put our bums through a lot, and it’s time we give back.
Bobby Box is a freelance writer and certified sex educator. He's currently Grindr's sex columnist and his work has been published in Daily Beast, Playboy , Askmen, Elle , NewNowNext, The Advocate , and more.
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