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吴建民柴玲，请闭上你的嘴! (2012.6.29)
惊闻六四23周年之际，原北京学运领袖柴玲女士，发表了原谅邓、李和戒严军人的公开信。她在公开信里面说道：“我原谅邓小平和李鹏。我原谅士兵们冲进1989年天安门广场。我原谅目前中国的领导下，继续压制自由和实行残酷的独生子女政策”。
看到这段话，我十分的惊诧，柴玲以她皈依基督的名义，要求用基督文化，宽恕文化去对待邓、李和戒严的军人。请问柴玲，你这个话代表谁？是代表六四的参与者吗？还是代表六四那些逝去的亡魂？
你能够说出这么无知的话，是不是因为你这么多年来一直在美国沐浴着自由的春风，动辄以六四功臣，学生领袖的身份在西方招摇显摆，根本就没有感觉过疼吧？但你难道忘记了你是来自被民主和自由冰封的中国，那里还有那么多你的同胞，正在忍受着人间苦难！
23年来，受难者经历的悲痛，你感受了多少？那么多你的六四同道参与者，有的当天就倒在了现场，你能想象出，他们是如何闭上他们愤怒的眼睛的吗？有的身体残缺，在忍受着精神和肉体上的双重苦难，尤其是他们的父母，这么多年来，有一位父亲因为看不到希望，就在不久前，选择了走自杀这条路。更有很多普通学生，受到清算，有的被学校开除，有的受到就业歧视，至于那些被劳动教养，被判刑的全国各地的学生领袖或者各地的示威者，包括很多工人和城乡居民等，他们所受到的非人磨难，是你一句宽恕就可以了结的吗？
没有六四，就没有“黄雀行动”，就更没有你柴玲。今天你可以在海外享有着西方的物质文明和舆论自由的话语权，你能站在岸上望着落水者来谈宽恕，是因为你乘着救生艇上了岸，已经不需要考虑船沉下去的危险，在那里乔装善者吧？你宽恕他们，那么请问，六四难道是你个人和邓小平、李鹏之间的私人恩仇吗？
如果你当时选择留在了中国，那么当你经受过每天被跟踪，被监视，被调查，你每一个电话，每一个朋友，甚至你每一个私人之间的亲密言行，都被警察严密掌握，你还会说出宽恕他们的话吗？
如果你当时选择留在了中国，那么当你经受过被关押，被审讯，被逼供，被羞辱，被剃光你的头发，在看守所，在法院，在监狱，在被一群狱警手持警械，威逼你蹲下甚至是跪下的时候，当你的尊严经受着人格的震颤的时候，你还会说出宽恕他们的话吗？
如果你当时选择留在了中国，即使你坚持到出狱后，也不能随便选择你想居住的城市，不能随意选择你想从事的工作，你的亲朋好友不能和你有正常的往来交流，你昔日的爱人因为你给对方带来的前程上的影响，和你一刀两断，划清界限，甚至变成了你的仇人，你还会说出宽恕他们的话吗？
你居然会说出你每天在为邓、李和戒严军人祈祷的话语。我想问，那些飘逝在六四广场上的冤魂，你为他们祷告了吗？那些失去亲人的天安门母亲们，你为他们祷告了吗？那些为理想和民主献身的，把青春全部送在了囹圄里面，在牢狱里受尽身心折磨的六四学子，青年教师，城市平民，你为他们祷告了吗？
在几年前一部叙述六四的纪录片里，你表达了你当时自己不想死，但觉得有必要让大批人去死——因为这样才能引起震撼来产生革命。也就是说：作为一个学生领导人，你要用别人的鲜血来打开民主的道路。你有没有扪心自问过：谁来宽恕你？
什么叫宽恕？受害者的苦难没有结束，加害者没有丝毫悔意，六四的真相，包括究竟谁是元凶？谁是受害者？死难人数是多少？受伤及受迫害的人数是多少？叫什么名字？当这些基本的真相我们都不清楚的情况下，何谈宽恕？在没有真相的前提下，去谈任何宽恕，就是对受难者的极大的不尊重。
曼德拉曾被关压27年，受尽虐待。他就任总统时，邀请了三名曾虐待过他的看守到场。当曼德拉起身恭敬地向看守致敬时，在场的所有人乃至整个世界都静了下来。他说：“当我走出囚室、迈过通往自由的监狱大门时，我已经清楚，自己若不能把悲痛与怨恨留在身后，那么我仍在狱中！
教皇约翰・保罗二世曾经到监狱去看望在梵蒂冈圣彼得广场向他开枪的土耳其人刺客阿加，并对他表示宽恕。而这个前提是因为刺客为自己的行刺行为感到心神难安，当他“理解了在他的力量―――开枪和杀戮的力量之上，还有一个更为伟大的力量”的时候，已经深深为自己的行为忏悔。
曼德拉可以谈宽恕，他宽恕狱警，是因为狱警已经停止加害，种族隔离已经结束。因此曼德拉可以把悲痛与怨恨留在狱中，教皇约翰・保罗二世也可以谈宽恕，他宽恕刺客，是因为刺客已经心神难安，深深忏悔。因此教皇约翰・保罗二世可以用灵魂去感召凶手。
但你柴玲没有资格说这个话。
你可能把你自己当成了曼德拉和昂山素季这样的政治家了。不错，政治家的抱负允许矫情，但是学者的天职是探究真相，个人可以宽恕个人，历史却不会饶恕任何罪恶。你认为你只要信了基督，就可以谈宽恕，那么请问二战后，纽伦堡法庭，对纳粹罪行执行审判的人，难道他们中没有信仰基督的虔诚者吗？
你要问我为什么对你这番话严重不满，那是因为我经历了你没有受过的苦难。你可以矫情，而我必须探求真相。你是北京高自联21位被通缉的学生领导之一，我是南京高自联17位被通缉的学生领导之一，你是黄雀行动后到达美国的学生领袖，而我们是放弃黄雀行动营救，并坚持在中国探索民主的那批不屈不饶的人。因为我们坚信，并不是所有人都需要到美国，去建设中国民主。
我们坚持下来，当然有天真的成份，认为政府不会秋后算账的。南京所有高自联的领导，没有一个从南京流亡海外，但是我们所有的学生负责人，都还是做好了要付出代价的心理准备的。当这一天很快就到来的时候，几乎所有的学生领导人，基本都进了看守所。我们十分明白拒绝黄雀行动的结果，就是大部分人被清算，被关押，我本人是8964后被审查，继而被政府判刑，先后关押过多个看守所，并在监狱里渡过了2500多个日日夜夜，直到97年香港回归后才出狱的。和我一起的很多同案，是有着太多相同经历的优秀学子们，他们虽经不同年限的关押，却从来没有放弃过自己的信念。
我们相信，要奋斗，就会有牺牲。我们从来就没有怨悔过，比起广场上那些已经为民主献出生命的遇难者来说，我们仍然活着，还能为理想继续奋斗着，就已经是最大的幸运。
因为六四后被通缉和追查的原因，你和很多民运人士，到达了西方，为中国的民主事业保留了一批骨干，我们十分尊重你们的选择。我们始终关注你们在境外对中国的民主事业所做的每一件事情。
你们保存下来的目的，是为中国民主革命做奉献的，而不是去背叛民主革命意志，去为屠夫唱宽恕之歌的。
你可以代表你自己去宽恕任何一个人，但请不要以上帝的名义。
多年来，我个人始终认为，推动中国的民主，决不在西方，更不在美国，境外仅仅是保护了你们的人身自由，但塑造思想，要靠你们的个人修行，历史上很多民主思想家的产生，民主精英活动家的诞生，都需要太多的因素，不仅要有个人魅力、学识才华、也要有道德涵养、苦难磨砺，才能达到为民主献身而始终无怨无悔的境界。至于像你这样的所谓民主精英，用哗众取宠的方式，去宽恕一个根本就没有丝毫悔意的加害者，并在境外搭建着空中楼阁，来建设什么你理想中的自由民主之中国，我看就如同在沙漠里行舟。
在这里我只能对你说一句，你个人可以宽恕任何人，但是历史不会饶恕罪恶。23年已经过去了，我们也已经人到中年，虽然我们每个人都是渺小的，不过是历史的匆匆过客，但作为学生领袖，是要有担当的。
请放弃你的轻浮和浅薄，去好好研读你的圣经吧。因为你做一个修女都还没有合格，就更不要说去做一个圣女了。
Chai Ling, Please Shut Your Mouth!
Upon the 23rd Anniversary of June 4, I am shocked to learn about a public letter written by the previous students leader of Beijing, Ms. Chai Ling, in which she forgives Deng Xiaoping, Li Peng as well as the martial troops. Ms. Chai said in the letter, “I forgive Deng Xiaoping and Li Peng. I forgive the military soldiers who tramped into the Tiananmen Square in 1989. I forgive the continuous suppression of freedom and cruel One-Child Policy led by the current leaders of the Chinese government.”
The above words came to me as tremendous shocker. In the name of her faith as a Christian, Chai Ling is calling for regarding Deng and Li with the Christian culture or the forgiving culture. I want to ask Chai Ling: Whom are your words representing? Are you representing everyone participated in June 4? Or the souls of those who died on June 4? Is it because you have been enjoying the breeze of freedom all these years in the U.S. that you could possibly utter these shameless words? Modeling around the western world crowned as the “Students Leader” or “Hero of June 4, you have must have been feeling little pain any more, if at all. But have you forgotten that you are from a China, a country that is still frozen from freedom and democracy and your country folks are still suffering the hardship as humans?!
Let me ask you, Chai Ling, what are you forgiving with? In the past 23 years, how much hardship of the participants have you experienced? So many of your comrades of June 4, they fell right in front of you that very day. Can you imagine how they closed their infuriated eyes? Some lost part of their bodies and have been pulling through excruciating pains both physically and mentally, let alone their parents for all these years. I know one of the fathers chose to commit suicide not so long ago out of despair. There are many more students who have been persecuted by the government, expelled from the schools, discriminated by the employers. As to those who were sent to the labor camps and sentenced to jails, including all the students leaders and demonstrators across the country, including many workers and civilians, all the inhumane treatments they have been subjected to, could be forgiven with an “Amen” from you?
Without June 4, there would have been no “Yellow Bird Rescue Plan”, much less any more Chai Ling. Today you can enjoy the material civilization of the west and its freedom of speech. Today the reason you can talk about forgiveness while standing on the bank watching the drowning ones fighting for their lives in the water, is because you have made to the bank with a life boat and no longer have to worry about when the boat is sinking. You are forgiving them, then does it make June 4 your personal feud with Deng and Li?!
Had you chosen to stay in China, and experienced what it is like being followed and watched every day, being investigated, every single phone call you make, every friend you contact, even all the personal intimate words you would have with them, everything monitored by the police, are you still able to say that you forgive them?
Had you chosen to stay in China and gone through being jailed, interrogated, tortured, humiliated, in the jail, in the courthouse, in the prison, being forced to crouch or kneel with clubs slamming your head by the police, when your dignity is shattered and trotted over, are you still able to say that you forgive them?
Had you chosen to stay in China, even if you make it till your release from prison, you are not allowed to choose the city you want to settle in, nor to pick any job you desire. Your friends and relatives cannot maintain a normal relationship with you. Your previous lover decides to break up with you or even become an enemy of you, because his future is at risk because of you, are you still able to say you forgiven them?
It is hard to believe that you would “pray for Deng and Li and the troops every day”. Have you prayed for the angry souls floating above Tiananmen Square? Have you prayed for the “mothers of Tiananmen” who lost their beloved children? Those who died for their dreams and democracy, who dedicated their best years to the prisons, who suffered all the physical and mental tortures you could possibly imagine, the students, the teachers, the civilians — have you prayed for them???
In the documentary a few years ago talking about June 4, you indicated that you did not want to die at the time, but thought it was necessary to send many other people to die, because that would bring the shock to the world and produce revolution. In other words, as a students leader, you want the path to democracy to be paved with other people’s blood. Have you ever asked from the bottom of your heart: who will forgive you?
What is “forgiveness”? When the victims’ sufferings are continuing and the criminals not showing a single sign of repentance, the total truth of June 4 yet to be released, including who were the masterminds? Who were the victims? How many people died? How many were injured and persecuted? What are their names? When these basic truths are still covered up, what could the forgiveness be based on? Before there is any truth, it is the ultimate disrespect to the victim to talk about “forgiveness”.
Nelson Mandela was jailed for 27 years after all the maltreatments. When he was sworn in as President, three of the jail guards who abused him were invited to the ceremony. When Mandela stood up and paid respect to those three guards, everyone at the ceremony and of the world fell into silence. Mandela said, “When I walked out of jail and walked towards the gate of freedom, I am fully aware that if I can not leave behind all the sadness and hatred, then I would still be in jail!” Mandela could talk about forgiveness. He could forgive the jail guards, because they had stopped committing the sins and apartheid had ended.
Pope John Paul II went to the prison and visited the Turkish assassin Agca who attempted to shoot him at the St. Peter’s Square, and showed the assassin his forgiveness. Yet the condition of the forgiveness was the Agca had felt the guilt and sin of his actions, and when he “understood there is a higher power above firing and killing”, he deeply repented his actions. Pope John II could talk about forgiveness and he did forgive his assassin because of the repentance. Mandela could leave the sadness and hatred in the prison and Pope John II could touch a killer with his soul, but Chai Ling, you do not have that entitlement.
Maybe you have mistaken yourself with politicians like Mandela and Aung San Suu Kyi. It is true that a politician’s ambition has room for affectation, , but a scholar’s job is to always search truth. An individual can be forgiven by another individual, but history never forgives any sin. If you believe you are entitled to talk about forgiveness just by believing in Christianity, then those trying Nazi’s at the Nuremberg courthouse after WWII, wasn’t anyone of them a Christian?
Do not ask why I cannot disagree any more with your words. It is because I have endured all the tortures you have not. You can choose to put on a refined show, but I must search for truth. You were one of the 21 students’ leaders of the Confederation of Beijing Universities who were issued arrest warrants. I was one of the 17 students’ leaders of the Confederation of Nanjing Universities who were issued arrest warrants. You were a student’s leader arriving in US after being rescued by the “Yellow Bird Rescue Plan”, but we were the ones who gave up on the rescue and chose to stay in China and search tirelessly for democracy. Not everyone has to go to the United States to help build democracy in China. We choose to persevere after making peace with our mind to pay the price. None of the students leaders from the Confederation of Nanjing Universities went into exile overseas after June 4. Almost all of us had gone in jail. The consequence of our refusal of the “Yellow Bird Rescue” was that most of us were jailed and persecuted. I myself was investigated after 1989, then arrested and sentenced by the government. Having been locked up in various jails, I spent more than 2,000 days in prison until 1997 after the return of HongKong.
Together with me, there are many outstanding students who had similar experiences. After short of long time in prison, they have never given up their faith. We firmly believe that fighting comes hand in hand with sacrifice. We have never complained or regretted. Comparing with those who lost their lives for democracy, we are still alive, still fighting for our dreams. That makes us the most fortunate ones already.
Due to the arrest warrants and intensive searchings, you and many others involved in democracy movement went to the west and preserved a group of elites for China’s democracy cause. We respect your choices, and over the years we have been watching everything you have done for China’s democracy. However, I personally have always believed that the advance of the cause of China’s democracy cannot be accomplished from the west, much less in the U.S. Staying away from China merely secures your physical safety, but the cementing of your beliefs depends on your own work. The birth of numerous democracy thinkers and democracy elite activists involves many factors: not only personal charisma and rich knowledge but also moral self-discipline, endurance of sufferings and pains. Only after all those could they finally reach a place where they could willingly dedicate themselves to democracy without looking back. As to a so-called “democracy elite” such as you, being attention hungry and try to forgive a sinner who has shown no sign of repentance, to try to build a free and democratic China out of air in the western world, is no different than trying to row a boat in the desert as far as I am concerned.
In the end, I have one thing to tell you. You can choose to forgive anyone you want, but the history does not forgive any sin. Twenty three years have passed and we have all reached our middle age. Even though we maybe insignificant as an individual passerby in the history, but as “Students Leaders”, we do assume extra responsibilities. Please lose your ignorance and superficiality. Study more Bible, as you still have ways to go to qualify as a nun, much less a Saint.