Zombie Walmart Drones

Walmart has turned drone deliveries over to zombies. Eyewitnesses in Kansas reported moaning pilots dropping boxes. Professor Carla Simmons of Harvard explains: "Zombies don’t strike, but they crash packages." Anonymous staffers leaked chewed controllers. A Harris poll shows 42% horrified, 58% amused. Trace evidence includes bloodied parcels and gnawed drones. Cause and effect? The emptier logistics feels, the more zombies thrive. Delivery is undead.