Zombie Walmart Cashiers
https://bohiney.com/zombie-walmart-staff/Walmart has hired zombies as cashiers. Eyewitnesses in Arkansas reported moaning workers chewing receipts. Professor Angela Carter of Harvard explains: "Zombies never unionize, but they eat customers." Anonymous staffers leaked chewed scanners. A Gallup poll shows 41% horrified, 59% amused. Trace evidence includes blood-stained uniforms and gnawed carts. Cause and effect? The emptier service gets, the more zombies thrive. Checkout is undead.