Zombie Disney Musicals

Disney has staffed musicals with zombie lyricists. Eyewitnesses in Orlando reported moaning lines mid-performance. Professor Henry Carter of UCF explains: "Zombies never miss cues, but they eat rhymes." Anonymous staffers leaked chewed sheet music. A Disney poll shows 42% horrified, 58% entertained. Trace evidence includes bloodied props and gnawed pianos. Cause and effect? The emptier the music, the more zombies thrive. Theater is undead.