World Public Sex
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World Public Sex
by Jamie Bellavance Published: Aug 9, 2006
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Dozens of women confess the best places they've ever done the dirty
When it comes to sex, some women want it off the mattress. Yes, they love 500-thread count sheets and down comforters, but that's just for sleeping. If you really want to heat up your sex life, surprise her in a more spontaneous setting. (And for more amazing out-of-the-bedroom ideas, check out The Men's H ealth Big Book of Sex .)
We snuck into the Women's Health forums to see what the ladies were talking about, and came across this thread about the "craziest place you ever had sex." Take a hint from these adventurous babes, and fulfill her fantasies with one of our sexy rendezvous. Or add your own sexcapade to our list in the Men's Health forums.
4. Bolder Boulder "The time we were on a huge sun-warmed boulder along a mountain stream through the Great Smokey Mountain National Park. Nothing like the great outdoors!"
CONTINUE: 1,138 women tell us how exciting it was to fool around in these hot spots »
We asked 1,138 women to tell us how exciting it was to fool around in these hot spots.
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In a movie theater, according to a ticket-counter worker
At a crowded music festival, according to a seasoned festival-goer
In a parking lot, according to a teenage boy
At the beach, according to a lifeguard
In a bar bathroom, according to a bartender
In a cab, according to someone who has successfully pulled it off
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You can pretty much count on two things when it comes to sex in public places: anyone who says they’ve never thought about it is lying, and anyone who says they do it all the time and have never been caught is lying.
We’re here to help with the not-getting-caught part by pulling a list of some of the most popular places for a public tryst, and seeking out experts to share the best ways to actually pull said trysts off. Oh, and by experts, we mean anyone from former box-office workers and lifeguards to high school kids -- you know that people who typically can't have sex at their own home are among the best sources for this subject.
Obviously, partake in any of these at your own risk.
Step 1: See a shitty movie. According to a dude who worked in a small-town movie theater , this could potentially give you away. BUT it’s also pretty hard to pull off public sex during opening night of, say, Star Wars . “We had two teenagers come in and buy a ticket to one of the worst box-office movies ever," our source said. "It was so obvious, like they should have been in school, but I sold them the ticket.”
Step 2: Opt for a matinee, the earlier the better.
Step 3: Head toward the front. “You can see in the monitors who is seated where," our source told us. "These two were in the back-left corner. If there’s no one in the theater, you should go in the front -- even on the floor. I never would have seen them up there.”
Step 4: [Parental discretion advised] Step 5: If you’re a teenager, do none of this. “When I told my manager two kids bought a ticket to this film in the middle of the day, he told me ‘you need to go check in on them right now.’ Then he handed me a broom.”
Step 1: Wait for the headliner to take the stage. Frequent Bonnaroo and Outside Lands attendees (let’s be honest, you don’t have to hide anything at Burning Man), claimed this is the best way to achieve any small resemblance of privacy. “There’s always one time slot when there’s only one show playing, the headline band," one source said. "That’s when you make your move.”
Step 2: Tell your posse you’re dipping. When it comes to tracking location, festival-goers are not unlike park rangers. They travel in packs, maintain a well-marked HQ (read: balloon), and when one of their own goes missing, a manhunt will almost always ensue -- especially should certain festival antics come into play (we mean hula hooping, of course).
Step 3 (if there’s a camping area): Go there. If you can’t find your tent (because of all the hula hooping), or don’t have one, hide between the sea of others and pitch your own.
Step 3 (if there’s not a camping area): At OSL (Outside Lands), there’s no camping allowed, but what it lacks in tents, it makes up for in woodsy paths that lead to smaller, secluded stages. Go to one of said empty stages armed with a giant sheet or blanket.
Step 4: Wrap yourself up like a burrito and have sex in the dirt while you fist pump to “Ain’t Life Grand” playing on the main stage.
Step 1: Pick a busy lot. “People automatically assume empty parking lots, but that's actually worse," our source reported. "It’s more likely they’re patrolled because the place is closed. You're better off in like, one of those massive mall parking lots or Super Target.”
Step 2: Go to a somewhat abandoned part of it. The top floor of a parking garage, or far corner out of the way.
Step 3: Crack the windows so the Titanic -like steam handprint doesn’t bust you.
Step 4: Assume the (missionary) position. Not that riding someone in the front seat isn’t encouraged, or perhaps even preferable, but it’s more conspicuous. You’ll more likely be out of sight by keeping it low, with one person on top holding on to the side door and grinding away.
Step 1: Wait until dusk. If you want to actually do it on the sand with waves brushing up against you like those black-and-white movies, either get a life, or don’t opt for the afternoon delight. Remember: suns out, guns out. And by guns, we mean so many lifeguards and beach-goers not even a sand dune will keep you under wraps.
Step 2: Do it in the ocean. This tactic is even lifeguard-approved. “Honestly it’s pretty much the only way to guarantee you don’t get caught. Doesn’t mean we don’t know, just means we can’t really prove it.”
Step 1: Don’t go too divey... you actually want a place with a decent-sized bathroom situation -- not one with a single stall. Bartenders are more likely to get complaints if you bogart the sole john in the joint.
Step 2: Have one person take a fake phone call and walk toward the bathroom. The reason for the fake conversation is just distraction, and because it’s fun.
Step 3: Go for the guys' bathroom. This may sound gross, and might be (depending on how divey the bar is ), but according to bartenders, hitting the men's room head tends to be less, um, frowned upon. “Guys rarely complain if a girl wanders in the men’s room.”
Step 4: Pick the handicapped stall. It’s probably bigger than your studio apartment.
Step 5: Make sure there’s only one pair of feet that can be seen from underneath -- meaning one lucky person gets to mount the toilet.
Step 1: Dress appropriately. Not that you necessarily plan impromptu sex, but if you’re going in with a game plan, our source stresses this works best if the female counterpart is wearing a dress or skirt. “Removing clothes is obviously a bit more blatant.”
Step 2: Have the girl sit on your lap facing the front. “This isn’t really out of the ordinary when you’re riding in cabs half the time anyway, and it’s pretty much the most discreet positioning you can do.”
Step 3: Hold on to her hips tight, and pretend you’re going over a lot of potholes in the road.
( Writer’s Note: We have it on pretty good authority that cab drivers don’t always give a shit if you’re banging in their cab anyway. )
We already told you, and even included fantastic stick-figure drawings... remember ?
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Liz Newman is a freelance writer for Thrillist and will never tell which of these she’s actually pulled off, unless you tweet to her at @lizn813 , then she probably will.
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There’s just something so juicy and thrilling about having sex in a public (or semi-public) place—the feeling that you’re doing something transgressive, that you’re dangerously close to getting caught, that you just couldn’t keep your hands off of each other long enough to get home. Of course, we don’t condone doing anything illegal! Why would you even say that? We’re just going to leave this list of our 11 fave places to get frisky alfresco here, and you can do with it what you will:
In reality, this is very low risk because there’s a lock on the door, but you can still get the thrill of feeling like you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing. Knowing that people are right outside, possibly trying to get in, can up the excitement, but then again, you may feel like a real asshole if you come out and find a family with a crying baby waiting to get in.
This is a lower-risk way to experiment with exhibitionism. It’s a good option if the possibility of being watched or seen is what gets you off more so than the possibility of being caught. You are in your own home, after all. However, having sex in plain view of people outside could technically get you in some trouble, so just keep that in mind.
Strangely enough, this seems to be one of the most common types of public sex even though it’s not the least risky way to do it. Depending on how and where you do it, you can significantly minimize or up the risk factor. Sex in a parked car in the middle of the night in a ghost town in the desert? Low risk. Sex in a parked car in a Target parking lot in the middle of the day? High risk.
The roof is a good place for sex in the open air while maintaining at least a shred of privacy. This one’s more for people who live in an apartment building (but not one of those super nice ones with a pool on the roof). The risk level involved in this endeavor really depends on how high up your roof is, how close together the buildings are, how many other people have roof access, and also how many squirrels live up there. #nuts4nuts
How risky (and therefore how exciting?) this is depends on whether there’s a lock on the coat room door and whether it’s your bestie’s party or your boss’s party. Great for thrill-seekers who also like amenities like a bed and climate control.
Not for the faint of heart (or the germaphobe). Whether it’s behind the bar you’ve just been to or just a random alley on your walk home, alley sex is some downright raunchy stuff. It can also be very, very hot. Just don’t touch anything.
This is a solid option for a beginner, but also exciting enough for a pro. Just keep in mind that yes, you can get pregnant if you have sex in a pool (or hot tub) . Also, please don’t do it with other people in the pool. That’s just rude.
At a restaurant, at a hotel, at a bar, pretty much anywhere. This is very risky unless the bathroom is a one-seater. Other people coming in and out can blow your cover in an instant. If you’re just starting off, try sneaking into a fancy hotel bathroom rather than getting down at Chipotle. In addition to being less trafficked, it’ll be cleaner and smell better.
Not speaking from experience or anything, but this is HIGH risk. Most broom closets don’t have locks on their doors. Someone could walk in at any moment. Turns out people often need brooms in the restaurant business.
This is another option that can be higher or lower risk depending on how you do it. Heh, do it . Obviously waiting until it’s dark and most people have gone home will significantly reduce the risk of being seen and/or caught. In general though, being in a park means you’re out in the open, which means not only that your genitalia will feel the sweet kiss of fresh air (for the first time?), but also that you could legitimately get arrested for this.
We classed this as the highest-risk option because it involves both the potential for someone walking in and the potential for being seen via security cameras. If time pressure and fear get your juices flowing, this may be for you. If those things instantly dry up your juices, on the other hand, stick to the bedroom.
P.S. Check out what we learned from a recent survey of Bedsider visitors here .
Lauren Kernan is the Director of Content and UX Strategy for Bedsider and Abortion Finder. In her spare time, she can be found sewing or starting and giving up on various other crafts.
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