Women Who Love To Fuck

Women Who Love To Fuck
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The number of women happy to put out on the first date is on the rise as more discover how empowering it makes them feel
IT is no surprise that most men like to have sex on a first date – but there is also a growing number of women who jump into bed as soon as they can.
A YouGov Omnibus poll revealed that 14 per cent of 18 to 24-year-old women would gladly put out on a first date – more than any other age group.
One in 14 women overall said they would sleep with someone the first time they met, compared to one in four blokes who would do the same.
But the number of women who have sex on the first date is set to grow as more of them discover how empowering and liberated it makes them feel.
As one woman told us: “It makes the date more exciting if you don’t set those silly ‘I don’t sleep with guys on the first date’ rules."
Here, four women explain why they refuse to hang around – and prefer to get down to business.
WAITRESS Agata Kubik decided to hit the dating scene following the breakdown of her marriage.
Most of her dates ended with sex – even if she didn’t see a future with the man.
Agata, from Lewisham, South East London, says:
"When I was single, my dates would almost always end up with sex. During that 18-month period, I slept with around 14 men.
"I usually like to have sex early on after meeting a guy because sex is a very important part of a relationship for me.
"If the sex isn’t good then I’m not interested."
"If I was attracted to a man I would always want to sleep with him so I would find out if there could be a reason for a second date.
"I would be very honest if I didn’t find him that attractive or if I felt like we weren’t connecting on a mental level.
"I’d simply tell him I didn’t see a relationship developing – but I would make it clear that I was interested in having sex that night if that’s what he wanted too."
"It’s important to be honest about these things as you don’t want to end up in a situation where one person likes the other more.
"I always make it clear if I’m looking to have sex with them for that night only, or if I am looking for something more."
SINGLE mum Melissa Wilkinson from Allerton Bywater, West Yorks, says having sex on the first date is normal – and she likes to try before she buys.
Melissa, who is a full-time carer for her 14-year-old son Jaden, says:
"I think just as many women have sex on a first date as men – we just don’t talk about it. We’re too worried what people might think.
"When a man gets a woman into bed on a first date they’re labelled a hero. If a woman does it, they get a bad name for themselves."
"Having sex on a first date is like trying before you buy. I don’t see any point waiting months to have sex, especially at my age.
"I need to know early on if I’m sexually compatible with someone or the relationship won’t work. I don’t want to waste time waiting to find out.
"I met an ex-partner online and we had sex on our first date.
"It was amazing. As he drove me home I knew we’d sleep together. As soon as we walked through the door we had sex."
"Our relationship lasted for years and having a great sex life gelled us together.
"When we split up I met men through Tinder and Plenty of Fish.
"I got chatting to a man on Tinder and we met up at a hotel and fell into bed as soon as we got there.
"It was really exciting – but when I suggested going out for a few drinks afterwards, he decided that he just wanted to spend the night in the room.
"Then we had an argument so I left early the next morning.
"Next time I will make sure I’m at least treated to a meal and a drink before we sleep together."
PALS tell off Helen Brown, from Maidstone, Kent, when she sleeps with guys on the first date.
But she thinks they are out of touch and that women should call the shots.
Helen, who runs a cleaning business, says:
"I’ve been on a number of first dates over the years where it’s turned into sex at the end.
"When I tell my friends they always quote the three-date rule, which says a woman must wait until she has had a third date with a guy before having sex with him, but I don’t agree.
"I think you should do whatever you feel comfortable with.
"Some guys assume sex will happen on a first date and other’s don’t, so it can be really empowering to say, 'I don’t care about the rules – I want to sleep with you because I want to know if you can satisfy my needs.'"
"I think it’s better to get straight to the point, and I’m like that with the initial chatting, too.
"If I meet someone online then I will ask to meet up straight away.
"I don’t see the point in dragging it out because you’ll only know if there’s a connection once you meet in person.
"I’ll only sleep with someone if I like them and I can see things going further."
"I think it’s a normal part of dating, but if I’m not into them then I’ll make a polite excuse and go home alone.
"I’ve had to give a few guys the brush-off after sleeping with them as the spark wasn’t there.
"I’m quite a sexual person so that’s important to me. It’s better to find out sooner rather than later.
"I think my friends are unsupportive when I sleep with someone on a first date because they’re in long-term relationships.
"They don’t understand what dating these days is like."
MUM of one Delilah Jay, from Barnes, south London, says the best sex is after a first date.
She also uses it as an opportunity to check out their home. Office worker Delilah says:
"I am seeing somebody at the moment but still dating other men because it’s important to keep your options open.
"It makes the date more exciting if you don’t set those silly 'I don’t sleep with guys on the first date' rules.
"The best sex I’ve ever had is when it’s spontaneous after a first date. It adds a bit of adventure."
"But I expect guys to make the first move and I never take a guy home with me. I like to check out their living situation.
"It gives a good insight into who they are before you commit to a second date.
"If he’s messy, lives with his parents, has weird hobbies or a really plush house, it’s nice to know early on.
"I sleep with about 50 per cent of my dates and then half of those I will go on to see again."
"I don’t want to waste three more dates on somebody then sleep with them and find there’s no sexual spark.
"It’s better to figure out if you’re better off as friends at the start.
"I’ve had a few long-term relationships in the past and I’m always looking for love.
"I slept with a previous partner on our first date and we were together for a few years, so that shows it can lead to love."
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What do women want? You’re going to have to ask them. That’s the conclusion of the largest study to analyse the diversity of female sexual pleasure, published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy . The researchers aim to break down the ways in which women find pleasure, giving couples insight about how to boost their love life.
Debby Herbenick at Indiana University and her colleagues discovered that women’s preferences in the bedroom vary dramatically, but there are a few things that most tend to enjoy. A word of warning: this is going to get graphic.
The study asked 1,055 heterosexual women in the U.S. to answer a questionnaire that covered everything from sexual attitudes down to their preferred pattern of genital stimulation. The participants ranged from 18 to 94 years old.
Their answers were revealing: More than 36% of women reported needing clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, while less than a fifth reported that intercourse alone was sufficient. An additional 36% said that clitoral stimulation wasn’t necessary, but made for a better orgasm.
The majority of women said that some orgasms feel better than others, whereas 10.8% reckoned they all feel the same.
When asked about their ideal techniques, two thirds preferred direct clitoral stimulation. Of those that preferred indirect stimulation, the majority preferred touching "through the skin above the hood," while a smaller number preferred touching "through both lips pushed together (like a sandwich)." Fewer than 10% of women enjoyed stimulation to their mons pubis – the squishy area of tissue above the pubic bone. Around 5% preferred it when their partner avoided the clitoris altogether.
When the women were asked about what pattern of stimulation they enjoyed, most indicated that a repeated rhythmic motion was ideal. The least preferred pattern involved a partner putting extreme emphasis on one part of the motion – for instance, more pressure on the left side of the genitals.
That said, the results suggest that it's hard to go wrong in this department – 13 out of the 15 different patterns of stimulation given as options were endorsed by the majority of respondents.
Something else most women agreed on: light to medium pressure on the genitals is best. Only 1 in 10 said they preferred firm pressure during stimulation.
The results show – unsurprisingly – that there's no one-size-fits-all when it comes to getting hot under the covers. The women in the study showed a wide variety of preferences as a group, yet on an individual level tended to endorse a narrow range of techniques that they specifically enjoyed. Which all just underscores the value of talking about sex with your partner.
There are a few things that will get you by in the meantime. More than half the women in the study said that spending time to build arousal, having a partner who knows what they like and emotional intimacy contributed to better orgasms. And one last thing: stamina is less important than you might think. Less than one in five women indicated that "sex that lasts a long time" made orgasms feel better.
I’ll be investigating other aspects of your love life in future posts. I'll be finding out whether the G-spot actually exists, uncovering the science of female ejaculation, discovering why orgasms are good for the brain and how soon we’ll be getting our hands on a male contraceptive pill.

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by Dan Savage on March 22nd, 2007 at 9:00 AM
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I am one of those women who does not exist. I want sex just as much as my boyfriend does. I want it every day, hard and rough. And if he doesn’t want it? Well, that’s what dildos and vibrators were invented for! I’m pretty sure that I jerk off daily more than most men do in a week. Oh, and I’m not the only one of these women that I know. My boyfriend’s wife is the same way (we’re poly). There’s a reason he’s called the Luckiest Boy in the World!
I’ll be just one of many, and don’t think I didn’t miss your sarcasm, but I wanted to pipe up as one woman who has never—I mean never—met a man whose libido could match mine. If it were up to me, I’d be having sex twice a day. I’ve never met a man who could handle sex once a day (every day) after the first flush of lust. Several months in, everyone’s slowing down. I spent a long time wondering what was wrong with me (or wrong with my relationships) before I accepted that I just have a very high libido.
Luckily, I know how to masturbate. And there’s a certain freedom in knowing that no matter what, I won’t be having as much sex as I’d like. It means I don’t have to pick my partners based on their libidos.
Sex and relative libidos, like everything else in a relationship, end up in compromise. I pity the women—and the men—who don’t get that.
I’m sure (or at least I hope) you’re getting a flood of responses from women who want sex constantly—you do play to a particular crowd, after all. But I’m surprised you didn’t make one particular point—especially since you alluded to it on the podcast just a few weeks ago!
Sewell’s argument assumes that we women have lower sex drives because we have less testosterone than men—it’s natural, game over, let’s go eat chocolate. But she ignores the fact that testosterone levels are not static. Women can increase our testosterone production”¦and we should. Aside from the benefits of a higher sex drive (orgasms, intimacy, a happy partner, orgasms), testosterone increases energy, enhances immune function, and prevents osteoporosis. All that, and all we have to do is exercise, lift weights, and eat more protein and veggies. Even things like action movies and booze cause women’s testosterone levels to spike, so maybe we should try Batman Begins and a vodka martini before giving up and reaching for the Hershey’s.
Damn, your last column was depressing. The fat lesbians eating Doritos in lieu of sex is an image I could live without. Not that I have anything against happy fat lesbians, or Doritos, but because as a straight married woman whose husband is also unhappy about the frequency of our fucking, that’s just not a category I want to put myself in.
I confess to using some of the "if only" excuses myself. "I’m too tired," "I’m too stressed," that kind of thing. It’s true, to a point. You were right on about not wanting straight-up vaginal intercourse (no pun intended). Sometimes I really want a hard fucking, sometimes, you know, all that pounding is too much. I’d much rather give and receive oral. With no goddamn chocolate sprinkles, thank you very much. The sulking that ensues doesn’t put me in a good frame of mind for a hot blowjob, however. How I would love to hear, "Hey honey, I hear that you’re not up for some marathon fucking tonight. How about we just both masturbate together? Or go down on each other?" You’re right: Men have to learn that this isn’t a consolation prize. And I promise to do it cheerfully.
I love my husband. I love fucking him. I also know that I do say no more often than yes. I’m working on this. I wish he would cut down on the sulking. He’d get fucked a lot more "if only" he would.
I am writing in response to your advice to Not Giving Up in which you break it to him that women with insatiable libidos don’t exist. While I agree that most women don’t have as high a sex drive as men do, I vehemently counter your claim that women who want sex constantly don’t exist at all. I am lucky enough to have one such woman. Her desire truly is constant. There has never been a moment when she has turned me down for sexual anything. Back when we didn’t have any roommates, Sunday was sex day. We had sex every other day of the week, but on Sunday we woke up, fucked, got some lunch, fucked, got some dinner, fucked, and fucked some more until we passed out. This went on for almost a year. I myself sport a healthy libido (too much for my ex), but even I have trouble keeping up with her. Before I met her, she was burning through the one-night stands (and now threesomes) and estimates she’s had about 60-plus women by now. Yes, we are lesbians, so maybe your assertion that straight couples will never have perfect libido harmony is correct, but don’t go telling people that we don’t exist at all.
My boyfriend tells me that I am a rare desert flower. I am ready, willing, and able to get it on nearly 24/7. My boyfriend occasionally has to spend a night alone at his place to give his body a chance to recover, because when we’re together we have sex an average of two to three times a day. We are both total freaks and enjoy a variety of kinks, so it’s constantly different and exciting.
To me, the real evil is the over-romanticized idea of relationships that movies and books often portray. Women view sex as an extension of love and romance, and I believe this gives them a warped view of sexuality from the beginning. The idea that we each have only one true soul mate with whom we will live in harmonious and uncomplicated bliss for all eternity is a crock of shit. If people would focus their attention on finding a partner who, while not perfect, shares most of their core values and at least a few of their personal interests, and then treat their partner’s sexual desires with respect and an eagerness to ensure their fulfillment in whatever way works for that individual, we’d have many more happily coupled people in this world. We have to not only destroy the idea that good sex is some kind of automatic bonus dropped in your lap when you meet Mr. or Ms. Right, we also have to destroy the idea that there is only one particular Mr. or Ms. Right for each person, in whom all relationship problems will magically vanish.
Thanks for your response to NGU about the differences between sex drives as men and women age. What is particularly frustrating to me as a straight guy is when women whose libidos have subsided suggest that a lower sex drive somehow implies a more evolved state, that they are now focused on more important issues: social justice, discrimination, pedicures for their cats. To them
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