Women Describe Orgasm
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Women Describe Orgasm
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Carina Hsieh
Sex & Relationships Editor
Carina Hsieh lives in NYC with her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once called her the Samantha Jones of Tinder • She enjoys hanging out in the candle aisle of TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals.
Taylor Andrews
Taylor is one of the sex and relationship editors who can tell you exactly which vibrators are worth the splurge , why you’re still dreaming about your ex, and tips on how to have the best sex of your life (including what word you should spell with your hips during cowgirl sex )—oh, and you can follow her on Instagram here .
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“It’s like driving with the windows down and seat warmers on. But sexual. And a thousand times more intense.”
Real talk: Despite how movies , porn , and Netflix's Sex/Life make it seem, more than 75 percent of people with vaginas need more than penetration to orgasm . And what makes things especially tricky is that not every orgasm results in a huge, earth-shattering climax. Some are calmer , while others make you feel like you've stuck a fork in an outlet. The orgasm you might have in any particular situation can vary based on lots of things including intensity, sensation, situation, excitement, and even possible fears or inhibitions.
Now, with any orgasm, you might experience shaky legs, erect nipples , a tightness in or around your vagina , etc.—but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll happen every single time you orgasm. And your orgasm might actually feel different than your friends' orgasms, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself if you’ve got one vocal pal who brings up how they can orgasm vaginally and squirt when those two things haven’t ever really happened for you. Everyone’s body is different, and so is everyone's orgasm response. All that's to say: Orgasms are confusing.
Luckily, the more we talk about how unrealistic is it for many people to orgasm from penetration alone, the better chance more people will have more orgasms, and the world will simply become a better place. It's science, folks. And whether you’ve already orgasmed twice this morning or never have at all , it's helpful to know what the sensation feels like to a variety of people to better pinpoint your own pleasure. That's why we've asked 54 people to explain what their vaginal and/or clitoral orgasm feels like, so we can all get better at getting some. Take note, Netflix .
“It’s an intense tingling pleasure that starts in my clitoris then spreads (somehow slowly and all at once) through my whole body, down to my toes and fingertips.”—Chelsea S., 30
“Euphoria. Complete joy and pleasure building up until you reach the mind-blowing release of endorphins. Clenching to hold onto the feeling until you finally give in and then the best feeling hits.” -Rebecca B., 24
“Honestly the seconds just before it happens are almost painful. It’s like that drop in your stomach from a roller coaster and then all that tension explodes and shoots up the backs of your legs and everywhere else. Then for a while afterward you kind of just throb and pulse because your heart is beating so hard but you’re also so relaxed.”—Shannon N., 29
“It feels like a complete release but my body tenses. I feel myself contracting but for five seconds my brain goes blank, before I feel myself come back down to earth.”—Helen R., 27
"It's like a pot of water that boils over—a slow build with an eventual overflow of intense pleasure and pure bliss."—Zoey Z., 24
“It depends on what point of the orgasm you’re in. The beginning is exciting. You feel anticipation and pleasure that moves through your body at varying speeds and with varying intensity. In the throes of an orgasm, everything is tight and wound up, heightened but with a euphoric edge. At the completion of it all, it’s akin to the moment at the end of a massage—every nerve-ending is soft, every muscle relaxed. There’s a moment of just pure pleasure and peace.”—Amanda S., 34
“Right before you orgasm, it feels like you just can’t get a door open. Then when you orgasm, it’s like the door is flung open and a huge release or bright white light shines in.”—Reileigh T., 24
"An orgasm feels like you are trying to close the clasp on a necklace with long acrylic nails. It takes a while to get there, you struggle and you may scream, but in the end, it is the most satisfying feeling in the world."—Erin D., 24
“It feels like all of my nerve endings are being shocked by an electrical current that builds into a huge release physically and—if I’m in the right headspace—mentally.”—Christina K., 30
“The best orgasms I’ve had last at least one or two minutes when my partner continues a repetitive motion (or I do, if I’m on top). It feels like a rush of relief after being blocked. Sorta like a kinked water hose. The pressure and desperation for release builds and builds until it’s finally set free.”—Emily A., 26
“It starts in the center of my body and then is like a wave outwards to my fingertips and toes. For those 20 seconds or so, it’s pure bliss. When it’s good, I completely forget to breathe, but I don’t feel out of breath. It’s like nothing else matters in those moments, not even the simple act of breathing.”—Lindsay V., 28
“I’d have to describe it as a volcanic eruption or the Big Bang cartoons we used to see as kids. It’s a release of all of this tension/energy and it’s like your whole body has been trying to break down a brick wall for minutes, hours, days, however long and suddenly the wall just crumbles and you’re standing there out of breath and wanting to collapse and take the best nap of your life.”—Stacey T., 28
"An orgasm feels like a tingly release from all the teasing and sexual heat. I have so much control over my life throughout the day that the climax helps my mind and body relax."—Aimee P., 32
“It feels like a warmth that starts in my lower abdomen. From there it’s a slow burn until it reaches the tips of my toes and I push over the edge. Sometimes the moment right before I’m about to climax feels better than the finish itself, but once I get there my body kind of rides the waves until it dies out.”—Kelsey D., 29
“An orgasm feels like a volcano erupting and ice freezing at the same time. Almost like driving with the windows down and seat warmers on. But sexual. And 1000x more intense.”—Emme R., 29
“For me, an orgasm is a psychological and a physical experience. In my mind, it’s like I’ve been holding my breath and can finally exhale. This exhale is an intimate release that’s warm and comforting and invigorating Physically, I feel all my muscles contracting. When I finally climax my body is refreshed and my muscles, which were tightening throughout arousal, are finally loose.”—Nadège C., 30
“To me, an orgasm feels like really truly like letting go. It’s a rush like, whew , and then any and all tension I had disappears and I'm ready to either take on the day or get the best night of sleep ever.”—Sierra T., 24
“It feels like all the energy centers of my body are activated at once and I can feel an intense tension simultaneously in my brain and my limbs and whole body, sound coming through my throat. It’s a huge release.”—Brittany D.
“For me, an orgasm starts in the peripheral of my body, ie. the tips of my fingers, the inside of my knees, the tips of my toes, the top of my head. These body parts all begin to vibrate and hum with electricity, as the sensation then envelops my core and pulses through my stomach, chest and thighs. Finally the sensation crescendos with a full release of tension, stress and pain, then leaves you feeling as though there are thousands of tiny effervescent bubbles slowly gliding across your skin.”—Kaleah A., 33
“There’s nothing else in the world like it. It’s the overwhelming feeling of what you’d imagine the core of a volcano feels before fully erupting. It’s that sense of indescribable and pure emotion that once released, makes you feel free and high on life.”—Violet O., 32
“My orgasm feels as if I'm a volcano in human form, like I'm slowly heating up and building up various feel-good sensations. When I reach my peak, I erupt and release all of those sensations.” —Mitanette C., 35
“Reaching orgasm is like climbing a tall mountain. I climb and climb, the sensation of pleasure growing and building on itself, until finally I go over the peak and slide joyously, breathlessly to the bottom.”—Ali W., 31
“It feels like an eruption you have no control over. For me, the climax is a lot longer than the actual orgasm. The build up feels like I'm running out of air in a good way, and longing for relief. The last seconds before I finish feels a bit like I'm going to wet myself. Sorry if that sounds gross! But my best orgasms feel that way.”—Roxanne C*., 26
“To me it feels like the release of tension, kind of like if you could cram the relaxing feeling of a massage that works a sore joint into nanoseconds. It’s the intensity of the feeling in such a short period of time that makes it so special.” —Jordan G.*,28
"It feels like your vagina is squeezing and relaxing all at the same time. It's truly a sensation you can't really describe, but I imagine it to be like squeezing a kegel ball and then releasing it." —Ashley N., 34
"This is going to sound a little strange, but bear with me. You know that feeling when you've been holding in your pee for like 20 minutes and it feels almost like a tickling sensation? That's what an orgasm feels like...but more intense." —Michelle A., 21
“It feels like I have an electrical current running directly through my vagina. It’s just this crazy moment where every single cell is screaming Yes! ” — Emily G., 22
“It feels like you’re on a roller coaster and you’re finally at the top, and then you feel that stomach drop. The anticipation and buildup ends, so you just feel a smooth release. It feels cleansing, almost like the warm feeling you get after taking a few deep breaths.” —Jen F., 24
“It feels like crying, sneezing, and laughing all at the same time.” —Katherine L., 22
“I picture it kind of like a waterfall bursting over a cliff when it happens. Even if that does sound a little like peeing. But it’s this intense pressure that eventually gets released, and it feels incredible.” — Suzanne T., 20
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At first, it seems like National Orgasm Day, which falls on July 31, would top the list of silly made-up celebrations that people institute for no reason. But when you think about it, what deserves more fanfare than a day devoted to not just embracing, but promoting, the pursuit of physical pleasure ? In that vein, you should absolutely take advantage of the orgasm “holiday.” Use it as a chance to experiment in the hopes of finding out exactly what will help you reach a new peak. Need some inspiration? Here, eight women explain what pushes them over the edge in a way nothing else can.
“I personally like it a lot when my partner rubs my nipples while he’s inside me. The other thing that makes me feel like I’m actually on another planet, like seeing stars, is when we’re having sex with me on top and I start crashing my clitoris into his pelvis. Those techniques are sure to always give me a super orgasm.” — Loren U.
“After surveying nearly 150 women for my new book, O Wow: Discovering Your Ultimate Orgasm , I was not surprised to find that the ultimate, most spectacular, longest-lasting orgasm for most women—including myself!—is the blended orgasm. It involves clitoral stimulation, penetration, and sometimes even a little backdoor play. The blended orgasm sends me and so many other women over the edge because it ignites so many nerve endings all at once. The clitoris is not just the tiny external nub that most people (hopefully) are familiar with. It’s actually shaped like a horseshoe and is the same length as the average penis if you stretched it out, which means much of it is nestled inside. That is why penetration combined with external stimulation creates such a wow factor. Personally, I like external clitoral stimulation that is relatively fast and firm, sometimes circles and sometimes not. As for anal play, a light touch at the entrance where there are so many amazing nerve endings does the trick for me. I love the tease. The perfect scenario for me is when my partner penetrates me with two or three fingers and thrusts gently and firmly while licking my clitoris or tending to it with her fingers or a vibrator.” — Jenny Block, Ph.D.
“I have like a gazillion vibrators. Okay, in reality, I have four. I like all of them except one that just doesn’t have strong enough vibrations for me. I worried for a while that my masturbation was making it hard for me to orgasm during sex because I get off so quickly with the vibes but never could manage it with a partner, no matter what anyone tried. Turns out, all I needed was a guy who was willing to spend like 10 minutes on manual clitoral stimulation. I like pretty firm pressure and just rubbing in circles, nothing too fancy. Certainly not tracing the alphabet on me or anything. Actually, though, if he rubs my body a lot during foreplay—think caressing me up and down like we’re in a Harlequin novel—I’m way more turned on, which results in a bit of a stronger orgasm. Thank god I’m not embarrassed about my orgasm face because I’m sure it’s a doozy. The feeling is just so overwhelming that in any other context, I’d probably look horrific. I have this scrunched-nose, open-mouthed thing going on, and I tremble for like a minute after it happens.” — Kim C.
“I can't have vaginal orgasms, so to have a really amazing one, I need to be manually stimulated. It’s ideal if we’re at right angles to each other, like if he’s lying down with his head on the pillow and I’m lying crosswise with my body parallel to the headboard. If he uses soft, circular strokes on my clitoris, I have orgasms that are really strong waves of pleasure. If I have an orgasm in another situation, like with a vibrator, it’s more like sharp, short waves. I’m not sure why my way feels so much better, but I’m sticking with it!” — Karina T.
"Sex and the ability to orgasm have always been a very important part of my wellness protocol, especially after being diagnosed with breast cancer. Cancer robbed me of some of my, shall we say, womanly juiciness. I started using this therapeutic cannabis oil called Foria as a supplement to enhance pleasure. It actually created deeper, more satisfying, multiple orgasms for me. Many times, I just can't stop, which sometimes can be a challenge for a partner. But other times, masturbation with Foria is just what a single lady needs to get her day going! I’m so grateful because having a fabulous orgasm serves me physically, mentally, and emotionally.” — Leslie G.
"My boyfriend really enjoys slow sex—he says it helps him feel every sensation better—but what really does it for me is a little fast-action friction during penetration. It feels so intense for me. Some orgasms wash over you, but with this kind, it’s an explosion. Luckily, he's sure to speed things up midway through the action, then we slow things back down after I orgasm.” — Amy W.
“If you haven’t tried coconut oil for intercourse or your own self-pleasure, you must ! It’s like a tropical paradise in the bedroom. A little bit of coconut oil goes a long way. It’s the best lubricant that I have used for my own self and with my fiancé. For an amazing tingle, mix a drop of peppermint essential oil with the coconut oil—and oh, boy. As I know from experience, you’re going to take your orgasm to a whole other level. When I add the peppermint oil, I get a relaxing vibe from the smell, which puts me at ease. For women who have trouble focusing, this helps a lot! Once applied in conjunction with the coconut oil, I get a smooth yet warming sensation that really intensifies my orgasm. I may also experience an additional tingle during and after, which feels great. When just using coconut oil alone, the orgasms are less intense. I also love that both of these are all-natural, so I don’t have any irritation or burning.” — Kayla J.
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Lane Moore
Lane Moore is an award-winning comedian, actor, writer, and musician based in New York City.
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