Woman Describes Orgasm
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Woman Describes Orgasm
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Carina Hsieh
Sex & Relationships Editor
Carina Hsieh lives in NYC with her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once called her the Samantha Jones of Tinder • She enjoys hanging out in the candle aisle of TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals.
Taylor Andrews
Taylor is one of the sex and relationship editors who can tell you exactly which vibrators are worth the splurge , why you’re still dreaming about your ex, and tips on how to have the best sex of your life (including what word you should spell with your hips during cowgirl sex )—oh, and you can follow her on Instagram here .
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“It’s like driving with the windows down and seat warmers on. But sexual. And a thousand times more intense.”
Real talk: Despite how movies , porn , and Netflix's Sex/Life make it seem, more than 75 percent of people with vaginas need more than penetration to orgasm . And what makes things especially tricky is that not every orgasm results in a huge, earth-shattering climax. Some are calmer , while others make you feel like you've stuck a fork in an outlet. The orgasm you might have in any particular situation can vary based on lots of things including intensity, sensation, situation, excitement, and even possible fears or inhibitions.
Now, with any orgasm, you might experience shaky legs, erect nipples , a tightness in or around your vagina , etc.—but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll happen every single time you orgasm. And your orgasm might actually feel different than your friends' orgasms, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself if you’ve got one vocal pal who brings up how they can orgasm vaginally and squirt when those two things haven’t ever really happened for you. Everyone’s body is different, and so is everyone's orgasm response. All that's to say: Orgasms are confusing.
Luckily, the more we talk about how unrealistic is it for many people to orgasm from penetration alone, the better chance more people will have more orgasms, and the world will simply become a better place. It's science, folks. And whether you’ve already orgasmed twice this morning or never have at all , it's helpful to know what the sensation feels like to a variety of people to better pinpoint your own pleasure. That's why we've asked 54 people to explain what their vaginal and/or clitoral orgasm feels like, so we can all get better at getting some. Take note, Netflix .
“It’s an intense tingling pleasure that starts in my clitoris then spreads (somehow slowly and all at once) through my whole body, down to my toes and fingertips.”—Chelsea S., 30
“Euphoria. Complete joy and pleasure building up until you reach the mind-blowing release of endorphins. Clenching to hold onto the feeling until you finally give in and then the best feeling hits.” -Rebecca B., 24
“Honestly the seconds just before it happens are almost painful. It’s like that drop in your stomach from a roller coaster and then all that tension explodes and shoots up the backs of your legs and everywhere else. Then for a while afterward you kind of just throb and pulse because your heart is beating so hard but you’re also so relaxed.”—Shannon N., 29
“It feels like a complete release but my body tenses. I feel myself contracting but for five seconds my brain goes blank, before I feel myself come back down to earth.”—Helen R., 27
"It's like a pot of water that boils over—a slow build with an eventual overflow of intense pleasure and pure bliss."—Zoey Z., 24
“It depends on what point of the orgasm you’re in. The beginning is exciting. You feel anticipation and pleasure that moves through your body at varying speeds and with varying intensity. In the throes of an orgasm, everything is tight and wound up, heightened but with a euphoric edge. At the completion of it all, it’s akin to the moment at the end of a massage—every nerve-ending is soft, every muscle relaxed. There’s a moment of just pure pleasure and peace.”—Amanda S., 34
“Right before you orgasm, it feels like you just can’t get a door open. Then when you orgasm, it’s like the door is flung open and a huge release or bright white light shines in.”—Reileigh T., 24
"An orgasm feels like you are trying to close the clasp on a necklace with long acrylic nails. It takes a while to get there, you struggle and you may scream, but in the end, it is the most satisfying feeling in the world."—Erin D., 24
“It feels like all of my nerve endings are being shocked by an electrical current that builds into a huge release physically and—if I’m in the right headspace—mentally.”—Christina K., 30
“The best orgasms I’ve had last at least one or two minutes when my partner continues a repetitive motion (or I do, if I’m on top). It feels like a rush of relief after being blocked. Sorta like a kinked water hose. The pressure and desperation for release builds and builds until it’s finally set free.”—Emily A., 26
“It starts in the center of my body and then is like a wave outwards to my fingertips and toes. For those 20 seconds or so, it’s pure bliss. When it’s good, I completely forget to breathe, but I don’t feel out of breath. It’s like nothing else matters in those moments, not even the simple act of breathing.”—Lindsay V., 28
“I’d have to describe it as a volcanic eruption or the Big Bang cartoons we used to see as kids. It’s a release of all of this tension/energy and it’s like your whole body has been trying to break down a brick wall for minutes, hours, days, however long and suddenly the wall just crumbles and you’re standing there out of breath and wanting to collapse and take the best nap of your life.”—Stacey T., 28
"An orgasm feels like a tingly release from all the teasing and sexual heat. I have so much control over my life throughout the day that the climax helps my mind and body relax."—Aimee P., 32
“It feels like a warmth that starts in my lower abdomen. From there it’s a slow burn until it reaches the tips of my toes and I push over the edge. Sometimes the moment right before I’m about to climax feels better than the finish itself, but once I get there my body kind of rides the waves until it dies out.”—Kelsey D., 29
“An orgasm feels like a volcano erupting and ice freezing at the same time. Almost like driving with the windows down and seat warmers on. But sexual. And 1000x more intense.”—Emme R., 29
“For me, an orgasm is a psychological and a physical experience. In my mind, it’s like I’ve been holding my breath and can finally exhale. This exhale is an intimate release that’s warm and comforting and invigorating Physically, I feel all my muscles contracting. When I finally climax my body is refreshed and my muscles, which were tightening throughout arousal, are finally loose.”—Nadège C., 30
“To me, an orgasm feels like really truly like letting go. It’s a rush like, whew , and then any and all tension I had disappears and I'm ready to either take on the day or get the best night of sleep ever.”—Sierra T., 24
“It feels like all the energy centers of my body are activated at once and I can feel an intense tension simultaneously in my brain and my limbs and whole body, sound coming through my throat. It’s a huge release.”—Brittany D.
“For me, an orgasm starts in the peripheral of my body, ie. the tips of my fingers, the inside of my knees, the tips of my toes, the top of my head. These body parts all begin to vibrate and hum with electricity, as the sensation then envelops my core and pulses through my stomach, chest and thighs. Finally the sensation crescendos with a full release of tension, stress and pain, then leaves you feeling as though there are thousands of tiny effervescent bubbles slowly gliding across your skin.”—Kaleah A., 33
“There’s nothing else in the world like it. It’s the overwhelming feeling of what you’d imagine the core of a volcano feels before fully erupting. It’s that sense of indescribable and pure emotion that once released, makes you feel free and high on life.”—Violet O., 32
“My orgasm feels as if I'm a volcano in human form, like I'm slowly heating up and building up various feel-good sensations. When I reach my peak, I erupt and release all of those sensations.” —Mitanette C., 35
“Reaching orgasm is like climbing a tall mountain. I climb and climb, the sensation of pleasure growing and building on itself, until finally I go over the peak and slide joyously, breathlessly to the bottom.”—Ali W., 31
“It feels like an eruption you have no control over. For me, the climax is a lot longer than the actual orgasm. The build up feels like I'm running out of air in a good way, and longing for relief. The last seconds before I finish feels a bit like I'm going to wet myself. Sorry if that sounds gross! But my best orgasms feel that way.”—Roxanne C*., 26
“To me it feels like the release of tension, kind of like if you could cram the relaxing feeling of a massage that works a sore joint into nanoseconds. It’s the intensity of the feeling in such a short period of time that makes it so special.” —Jordan G.*,28
"It feels like your vagina is squeezing and relaxing all at the same time. It's truly a sensation you can't really describe, but I imagine it to be like squeezing a kegel ball and then releasing it." —Ashley N., 34
"This is going to sound a little strange, but bear with me. You know that feeling when you've been holding in your pee for like 20 minutes and it feels almost like a tickling sensation? That's what an orgasm feels like...but more intense." —Michelle A., 21
“It feels like I have an electrical current running directly through my vagina. It’s just this crazy moment where every single cell is screaming Yes! ” — Emily G., 22
“It feels like you’re on a roller coaster and you’re finally at the top, and then you feel that stomach drop. The anticipation and buildup ends, so you just feel a smooth release. It feels cleansing, almost like the warm feeling you get after taking a few deep breaths.” —Jen F., 24
“It feels like crying, sneezing, and laughing all at the same time.” —Katherine L., 22
“I picture it kind of like a waterfall bursting over a cliff when it happens. Even if that does sound a little like peeing. But it’s this intense pressure that eventually gets released, and it feels incredible.” — Suzanne T., 20
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Gigi Engle is a writer, certified sexologist, sex coach, and sex educator.
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Ah, the first orgasm. Some women get up close and comfortable with their pleasure at a young age, and can't place a finger on when it all began. But others remember their first big O as a momentous event that happened much later in life, after many years of wondering.
This spectrum of experiences isn't too surprising considering that most of us had to learn about sexual pleasure and orgasms from sources like TV or (often similarly clueless) friends. (Thanks a lot, sex ed.) And as such, many of us ladies experienced our first orgasms by accident, or through some form of self-exploration.
Nevertheless, figuring out how to orgasm is a beautiful, important, right of passage for many women. It’s how we learn what our bodies are capable of.
Here are nine real, hilarious, often heartwarming tales from women about the first time they experienced an orgasm.
"I didn’t have an orgasm until college. My family was quite religious, so growing up, I never masturbated. My friends bought me a vibrator as a joke for my 19th birthday. But one day, sitting in my dorm room, I decided to give it a try. I secretly wanted to know what all the hoopla was about. I spent that entire afternoon coming, over and over again. That vibrator changed my world." — Nina, 25
Watch men and women spill the honest truth about exactly what they think about masturbation:
"My first orgasm was definitely with a shower head. You know, it’s kind of how a lot of girls figure it out. I didn’t mean to, but it felt really good. I was probably around 8." — Scarlett, 24
"I was walking home from elementary school, probably around third grade. I remember I shinnied up a street sign post and it felt REALLY good. I didn't have a name for it, but I still remember it and I'm 82." — Lilly*, 82
"I've been masturbating for as long as I can remember. I don't have a specific time when I first orgasmed, I feel like I've always been able to do it, though the way I do it has changed and evolved! When I was really young, I could just squeeze my legs together and make it happen.
"But it wasn't until I was 19 and involved with a 53-year-old silver fox named Karl (who actually listened to my body, unlike 22-year-old college seniors), that I finally had my first orgasm during sex." — Mal, 33
"I was 5 or 6 years old and discovered what my clitoris was while grinding up on a four-poster bed. I was maybe dancing or something?
"My mom remembers it vividly and loves to tell the story at family gatherings and to people I’m dating . She didn’t make me feel ashamed or embarrassed. I’m grateful that she taught me to be okay with my body. I don’t think I’ve stopped masturbating since." — Grace*, 28
"It was during a fully-clothed makeout with a boyfriend. We were standing on the sidewalk, next to his black '89 Mercedes, kissing, touching in the public darkness the way teens do when sleepovers are forbidden and bedrooms are within earshot of curious parents. The rhythm of our hips, his leg, and my lady parts made sparkles that shot down my legs and up to my brain—a blissful surprise I kept to myself. We broke up before college, both virgins, and him never knowing of his secret gift." — Whitney, 33
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"It wasn't until my late twenties when I met a man, a sexual partner, who taught me the greatest and most liberating sexual lesson of all. He told me that we couldn't have sex until I learned how to make myself orgasm. He said he'd never be able to please me fully if I didn't know how to ask for what I want. He left me with my 'homework' and patiently walked me through some sensual self starters and he playfully evaluated my exercises and techniques. And finally, I brought myself to my first orgasm. He was right, sex was much more passionate and much more enjoyable." — Lisa, 39
"I found an electric toothbrush in my family’s bathroom. This sounds so gross, but I’m not even sure who the toothbrush belonged to. I was just a kid. I took the head off and touched myself with it. It was like sparks all through my clitoris . I didn’t know what I had experienced was an orgasm, but I knew it felt amazing and I wanted to do it again and again. I put the toothbrush back after using it and continued the same thing for…maybe a few years." — Michelle*, 30
"I had my first ever orgasm with a boy in high school. We were sort of together, but never put a label on it. One day, at my parents house, he asked if he could go down on me. We’d only ever made out and he’d fingered me twice. Miraculously, he knew exactly what he was doing. He made me orgasm in less than five minutes. It was a spectacular first experience because it taught me to expect oral sex. If a guy wasn’t willing to go down on me, I wasn’t for him. It set a good standard for sexual pleasure." — Miranda, 30
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in Chicago. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.
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"I saw purple sparkles, then nothing, and then I swear to god I went deaf for a second."
1. "Mine happened on the couch after a lazy Sunday. My partner and I were taking a break from doing things around the apartment and started cuddling on the couch, then just started touching each other slowly. He eventually started going down on me , and when I came, it was one of those orgasms that felt like someone was dragging their fingernails down your body again and again and again, then you feel heat and chills, and then finally you tip over into your orgasm. Perfect." — Christina, 26
2. "I had been hooking up with this guy for a while, but the first time we smoked weed (I live in Colorado, so it's legal here) and had sex, I had the most toe-curling-earth-shaking orgasm . He came immediately after I did, and the feeling was so intense I couldn't stop thinking about having sex while high again for the next few days." — Kate, 28
3. "I'm pretty sure my best orgasm happened when I'd linked back up with a dude I'd met through w
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