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By Christian Hoffer
- October 17, 2018 06:18 pm EDT

The original Pokemon manga was never released outside of Japan and there's a very good reason why.
Almost every Pokemon fan in the United States is familiar with Pokemon Adventures , the long-running manga considered to be the closest depiction of the Pokemon world as the creator's envisioned. Pokemon Adventures is split into huge arcs, each of which loosely adapt a set of the Pokemon games.
However, Pokemon Adventures wasn't the first Pokemon manga. That "honor" belongs to Pokemon Pocket Manga , a gag manga by Kosaku Anakubo. The comic has been in print since 1996 and was published semi-continuously until at least 2016.
Pokemon Pocket Manga stars Red from the original Pokemon Red and Blue series, but with a few key differences from other Pokemon media. For one thing, Red's mascot Pokemon is a Clefairy that speaks Japanese (similar to Meowth in the Pokemon anime), although Pikachu remains a major part of the series. The other big difference is that the comic is insanely vulgar, which is probably why it never got translated into English or other languages.
Take, for instance, this early panel in which Clefairy tries to coach Red on how to catch a Pokemon. When Clefairy tells Red to pull out his Poke Balls, Red instead drops his pants and pulls out a different set of balls. As you can see, Red's scrotum appears to be insanely stretch as he can pull his testicles up to his shoulder.
You can also see another sequence in which Green's Charmander reaches into Red's pants and literally tries to run off with one of Red's balls. This is pretty crazy stuff.
While you're probably trying to comprehend that you just saw the private parts of the first protagonist of the Pokemon game twice, here's a couple panels of Pikachu taking a humongous dump:
Keep in mind, this isn't some unofficial Tijuana Bible - this is an official Pokemon manga licensed and presumably approved by The Pokemon Company. Other panels (which we'll spare you from) shows Clefairy whipping out its dick to pee and farting on Charmander's tail flame to cause an explosion.
The manga's early chapters also featured tons of "fake Pokemon" added to fill out the Pokemon world because Anakubo didn't want to just use the same 150 Pokemon over and over again. It's a very bizarre manga and one that you'll only find mentioned as a strange chapter in Pokemon history.
Can you ever look at the world the same now that you've seen Pikachu's poop and Red's penis? Let us know in the comment section below!
Copyright 2022 ComicBook.com. All rights reserved.

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“Geralt had just about been ready to tell the mage to fuck off when he smelt the distinct sour acid of fear heavily on his right. When he glanced over, he saw how tense Jaskier sat, his posture so perfect it had to hurt and his face as pleasantly neutral as he could make it. Fear was joined by anger, and as Jaskier watched Stregobor, resignation filled his eyes.
________________________________________________
Jaskier of Kaer Morhen, beloved of the Warlord known as the White Wolf and his right hand, and dear friend to all Witchers, has a secret that not even he knows. However, it takes two to keep a secret, and the second holder truly has some secrets to tell...
________________________________________________
Rating changed from M to E for graphic depictions of violence and smut.
Jaskier is 22 when he finds out a horrid truth about his life and his reality is in shambles. After years of petty fights, trauma, stalking and authority issues, he finally escapes the family in which he's clearly not wanted. He's now 25 and only the ghost of what his family once meant to him remains, as he lives in the house of his deceased uncle and has to deal with undiagnosed illnesses, trauma responses and a whole lot of chaos.
His mask eventually falls when he accidentally stumbles upon Geralt, who gives him the life he so desires and deserves and he can finally begin to heal.
They're not kind women, and they know each others weaknesses too well.
Yennefer liked pain, embraced pain, mostly giving it and every once in a blue moon receiving it. It's a predilection not for many, but still she was surprised upon discovering sweet and delicate Triss liked it when Yennefer held her wrists down, when she loomed over the red-haired sorceress and used force.
Feeling like Geralt is shutting down on them, Jaskier asks Yennefer for help.
Jaskier needs a change of pace, maybe a change that involves leaving his whole persona and perhaps face behind. He wanders for a while before returning home, to his real home tucked away in a little farm town hidden from view.
His mistake was building so much of his life around Geralt. He'd always been that way, wriggling himself in where he wasn't wanted: with the Pankratzs, Marx's damned lyrical club, the Cintran court. He did his best to maintain a clean break- carefully pulling his belongings from Roach's saddlebags, sewing his leg back up at the bottom of the mountain, avoiding any mention of wolf witchers, and escaping Rience on his own. // He's arse over tits indebted to Geralt. He doesn't even need to apologize when he's knocking on Jaskier's door at dusk clutching his child surprise. . The eyes disappeared for a moment and Geralt felt like collapsing but the peephole didn't close. Instead after an endless minute, pale fingers poked out offering... something. Geralt took it and looked down at his own fingers. A real Nilfgaardian silver penny. A rare sight these days. Jaskier must have been checking for a doppler. // Geralt doesn't want to think about why he'd felt it was necessary. . "She's called the Mischief Maker-" Jaskier thumped on the wall, "and she's not just a wagon Geralt. She's my home now. My livelihood. All wrapped up in one and I won't let you part us. She's on wheels Geralt."
Cela fait un an que Geralt de Riv, Yennefer de Vengerberg, et Cirilla Fiona Ellen Riannon ont disparu dans une barque sur Loc Eskalott, un an que le sorceleur et la magicienne sont morts lors du Pogrom de Rivie contre les non-humains, un an que leurs proches ont pleuré leur mort. Cela fait un an que Triss Merigold, malgré elle, renferme toujours en son coeur l'espoir qu'ils aient survécu, le regret de n'avoir jamais rien dit comme dernières paroles à Yennefer que des mots odieux, de n'avoir jamais réparé leur amitié... La magicienne a repris une vie calme en tant que guérisseuse à Maribor, mais lorsqu'un messager arrive avec une lettre de Kaer Morhen, l'espoir s'embrase. Lorsqu'elle apprend que Yennefer serait toujours vivante mais qu'elle aurait été enlevée par la Chasse Sauvage, Triss se jure qu'elle la retrouvera, quoiqu'il doive lui en coûter...

If you had told Geralt a year ago that he would soon find his soul mate, he would have smiled slightly and declared you insane. He would also have emphasized that there was no such thing for Witcher. They were killing machines, themselves beasts fighting others, only they looked human - but they weren't. Not to mention they took money for their services. In short, all things considered. There were no soul mates for Witchers. How wrong he was…

Or in Jaskier's words.

He knew that his soul mate was waiting for him out there, young, quite naive but adventurous, so he went out to find him. Especially since his father had told him he was a witcher, Jaskier at least had a limitation to work with. So it was only a matter of time before he found him, good thing he had plenty of time.

Yennefer decides that Halloween is the perfect time to try out a new toy. Triss is very, VERY willing.
Kinktober Day 2: Costumes // Sex toys
Yennefer comes up with a great way to surprise Triss for their anniversary and she recruits some help from her family to keep her love distracted while she bakes and sets it all up.
Jaskier has a huge crush on his neighbor Geralt, who picks him up a few time a week to drive to the shared workplace together. But what happens when the car malfunctions and they find themselves stranded in the middle of nowhere with no service?
The anger comes later, once the fresh hurt has left him.
After the mountain, Jaskier tries his best to forget about Geralt of Rivia. It would be far easier if the Witcher would stop somehow getting Jaskier involved in his messes, or if he stopped trying to apologise, badly.
Jaskier is a wanted man, Nilfgaard is on the move, a princess is missing and a Witcher is wanted. There's a sorceress who has made it her one goal in life to annoy him. Somehow none of these are his biggest problem, your past will always catch up with you, no matter how hard you try to outrun it.
Jaskier attempts to outrun all his problems at once, he does not succeed in the slightest.
Jaskier is the one who pushed Geralt and Eskel together, and he takes great pride in this accomplishment. Now, he gets the pleasure of watching not one, but TWO beautiful men. He adores them both and will do NOTHING to jeopardize their happiness together. Not even if the two idiots decide to have phone sex when Jaskier can hear them, on purpose even!
Jaskier is going to die from embarrassment. Or horniness. Either one.
It takes a year for Jaskier to properly lick his wounds after the mountain. When Geralt doesn’t come for him, he makes a promise to himself: he will no longer write about someone else’s life, he’ll write about his own. He hears news of a mysterious town in southern Rivia that isn’t on any Continental maps, so he embarks on a journey to investigate. However, once he gets there, he’s embroiled in something he’d never thought possible — his own Destiny, his cursed Child Surprise.
When Geralt and Jaskier cross paths again, Jaskier makes the decision to follow Geralt one last time: to the halls of Kaer Morhen, where he and his Child can be safe. The threat of a second war hangs over the Continent like a ghost, and with a dark rider hot on their trail, Jaskier can think of no safer place than beside his old muse, no matter the cost to his own heart.
Geralt hasn't told Jaskier that he goes to therapy, but his secret might just be revealed at brunch with friends, where he finds himself sitting in front of his therapist.
Triss unleashes her new weapon on Yennefer...
There is a sub-section of the army whose purpose is to manage all communications to and from military service members in active duty. They are required to listen in on phone calls in case anybody says revealing or classified information.
Geralt Rivia is one such member. Normally, his job is fine, because he's supposed to just listen and say nothing, which works for him. One day, he listens in while Staff Sergeant Eskel Bryn calls home. He's instantly smitten.
What's a guy to do when he gets to hear everything about a man but not allowed to speak back?
Yennefer, for her part, had gone very still, violet eyes wide and fixed on the ring box in Geralt’s hand. She stared for a long moment, then abruptly nodded her head once and turned on her heel towards the kitchen.
“Right. Wine. I don’t know exactly what’s happening right now, but whatever it is, we need wine. A lot of wine. Maybe all the wine you have.”
I saw the best Reddit post ever written and this idea came to me nearly fully formed, like a vision from god
Eskel was frowning, scenting the air. “Geralt, is he…he’s pregnant, isn’t he?”
Yennefer sucked in a breath, and Geralt knew she’d support his decision. Now to convince Vesemir, who was still scowling. “He could put us in danger, Geralt. All of us, including Ciri!”
“Then tell me, what was I supposed to do? I couldn’t kill a pregnant Omega!”
(Aka: This is literally a rewrite of 'They thought us Blind' but from Geralt's POV, with a couple scenes added for context)

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tip: "uchiha sasuke/uzumaki naruto" angst kudos>10

“Geralt had just about been ready to tell the mage to fuck off when he smelt the distinct sour acid of fear heavily on his right. When he glanced over, he saw how tense Jaskier sat, his posture so perfect it had to hurt and his face as pleasantly neutral as he could make it. Fear was joined by anger, and as Jaskier watched Stregobor, resignation filled his eyes.
________________________________________________
Jaskier of Kaer Morhen, beloved of the Warlord known as the White Wolf and his right hand, and dear friend to all Witchers, has a secret that not even he knows. However, it takes two to keep a secret, and the second holder truly has some secrets to tell...
________________________________________________
Rating changed from M to E for graphic depictions of violence and smut.
Racconto scritto per il Writober 2022. Una raccolta di slice of life dedicati a Geralt e Yennefer, al loro amore e alla loro vita insieme.
PROMPT#1: "This is the sign you've been looking for" PROMPT #2: "Respiro" PROMPT #3: "I can't explain and I'm not even trying"
"Witcher business?” Eskel asks, recognizing the fury burning in Geralt's eyes, the one that stemmed from innocents being hurt by monsters who deemed themselves men. Technically it is in that Valdo will be blacklisted but the rage, the want to show him how monsters are dealt with isn’t. It would never be sanctioned, should never be. “Valdo Marx is blacklisted. Every chapter to be notified. He’s not welcome here, better for him if he doesn’t make it through the doors,” Geralt’s words are calm, but it’s the danger that lurks in the spaces between. Lambert looks over his shoulder at Eskel as he shifts to the side, keeping an eye on Geralt. This was broad strokes measures, actions with repercussions that couldn’t be easily undone. We all know the story of how the White Wolf saved the Songbird, but this, dear reader, isn't that story. This is the tale of how it would have gone should the White Wolf find out long after blood has been spilled that someone else ensured the Songbird lived to sing another day. This is how the Songbird gains an army of Wolves to bring the monster to justice all while learning he's just as strong with a damaged wing.
“辖者，当知其辖。为辖者，当知其因”。第三次北方战争方结束，一位猎魔人养成的公主被派往诺维格瑞，旨在立朝，取和，习得统治之术。然而诺维格瑞这座大都城水深莫见，希里必须面对腐败的政区首长、非礼的教会和奸诈的朝臣。有时世界需要的是一个猎魔人，有时世界需要的是一个王者。间或有时，两者兼之。这个故事，有关理想主义与政治，信仰与信念，背叛与成长；有关希里面对她的命运做出的选择，以及选择带来的后果。
When a fight with a monster that wears the faces of dead loved ones goes wrong, Jaskier must admit to some startling truths about his past. Secrets he's long kept buried threaten to come to life, risking his already fragile relationship with Geralt and much more.
Or Geralt just wants to know why his friend beat the shit out of a witcher.
(Inspired by the secondary quest "Following The Thread" in The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt.)
Every year, Jaskier’s town holds the Gods’ Celebration where an oracle gives them a task, something to act out from their gods’ legends.
This year, Jaskier will get more out of it than he ever dreamed.
What if Geralt told flaminca why he needs this bandit.
Basically what if Geralt and Hansa didn't stop in Toussaint. It changed many events and... I'm not gonna tell you, just read.
Jaskier is 22 when he finds out a horrid truth about his life and his reality is in shambles. After years of petty fights, trauma, stalking and authority issues, he finally escapes the family in which he's clearly not wanted. He's now 25 and only the ghost of what his family once meant to him remains, as he lives in the house of his deceased uncle and has to deal with undiagnosed illnesses, trauma responses and a whole lot of chaos.
His mask eventually falls when he accidentally stumbles upon Geralt, who gives him the life he so desires and deserves and he can finally begin to heal.
What do the sex lives of The Witcher's women look like when Geralt isn't there? This is a collection of short fics in which Geralt's female friends use sex for pleasure, pain, bribery, and practically anything else they can think of.
Driven from the continent by human cruelty, Witchers have found a second home on the sea. They have been branded as pirates by the humans, who are too preoccupied by their war to pay them much mind. Lead by their Captain, The Great White Wolf, they take what they need from ships that cross their path and return their spoils to the hidden port of Kaer Morhen.
Jakier has been a spy for the Redanian secret service for many years. Recently posted aboard a Nilfgaardian ship, he has been ordered to collect information about the young girl they are transporting. After living as one of the enemy for most of his life, he has forgotten what it means to live in his own skin.
When the spy and Witcher captain meet, they'll discover ex
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