Wifes First Time With A Woman
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Wifes First Time With A Woman
by Gigi Engle Published: Nov 1, 2017
Gigi Engle is a writer, certified sexologist, sex coach, and sex educator. Her work regularly appears in many publications including Brides, Marie Claire, Elle Magazine, Teen Vogue, Glamour and Women's Health.
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"It was such a natural and liberating experience."
Remember your first time having sex? That uncomfortable, strange, confusin g ordeal? Yeah, we’ve all been there.
Despite what we see in the movies, first time romps are rarely the most orgasm-inducing, rocket-blasting sensual experiences of our burgeoning sex lives. The truth is, no one knows what they're doing.
And what about having sex with a woman? When two women have sex, it is as unique, awkward, and liberating as any other kind of sex. Sex between two women is valid, strange, and beautiful. But if you've never done it before, the experience may seem a little daunting. So, if you've been curious about what it's like to get down with another lady, or want to know what to expect when you finally take the plunge, here are six real women's stories on having sex with a woman for the first time.
"I had asked around about sex with women for the first time and heard everything from a casual 'it's hot' to 'it felt like coming home' to 'turned out eating pussy wasn't for me,' so I was very curious how I would react. I didn't really 'react' one way or another, it just felt very natural and I absolutely liked it. I indeed was struck by the softness of two female bodies against one another and how fulfilling sex can be without a penis in sight, but it was really just a great date followed by great sex. It absolutely confirmed that I was bi/queer but more than anything it just reminded me that as a bi person people are people, and good sex, in general, involves emotional (even casual sex !) and physical intimacy. Tuning into another person's body and mind doesn't change based on the body or genitalia of the person you're sleeping with. 13/10 would do again and did do again." — Sophie, 29
"One weekend party night, a friend from high school came up to visit me in my college town. We went out to a house party and started dancing together. When we got back to my place to crash, I invited her to sleep in my bed. Then I asked if I could kiss her.
"My heart was stuck in my throat at the idea that I could totally be reading her moves on me wrong and she might say no and reject me, but instead she cuddled up to me and gave me a huge kiss. We started making out and I said to her, 'I've never gone down on a girl and I really want to. Do you want to try?' She was just as interested. I was so nervous! I didn't know what I was doing, so I let my instincts take over. It was such a natural and liberating experience. It was also one of the few times I felt dominate and in control with a sexual partner.
"The next morning was a little awkward. Neither of us were identifying as bisexuals, but we also didn't chalk our experience up to being just a drunken mistake. We never had sex again after that, but it was what started my journey on identifying as bisexual and seeking out female sexual partners." — Kenna, 30
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"Sex with a woman for the first time gave me the courage to reclaim penetration. For as long as I could remember, penetration actually terrified me, and given my heteronormative definition of sex , I wrongly believed I could never have 'real sex' because of it. And, also wrongly, I believed that as a 'real lesbian' I couldn't enjoy or take part in penetration. But my first partner eased me into the feeling. And as I was eased in, it's like the d*mn floodgates opened and I realized penetration isn't just a dick's power. I feel more confident and excited to experiment with strap-ons and internal vibrators , not just on my future (consenting) partners but for use by them on me too!" — Madeline*, 26
Learn 14 mind-blowing facts that will completely change the way you think about orgasms.
"The first time I had sex with a woman I was 15, maybe 16, and it happened totally by accident. I could definitely tell that we were attracted to each other and I was always nervous around her. We weren't close friends, mainly because I was a blithering idiot around her, because sexual attraction does that to people, you know? I knew I was gay but wasn't out, and I also intrinsically knew this girl was gay too. I think that's why we were so shy around each other.
"One night we were hanging out in a big group until it was just the two of us. We crawled up into her bunk bed (at camp) and at some point, she put her arm around me. The next thing I knew we were kissing and the next thing I knew she was going down on me! I was nervous as hell once we started kissing, but after a few seconds, it felt so right, that I was totally swept up in the moment! And then I started going down on her, and even though I had never done it before, it just felt really natural. Afterward, however, we were both awkward. I mean how could we be normal around each other after we had experienced this crazy-intense sexual experience? We avoided each other. For a year." — Zara, 31
"I'd been dreaming about having sex with women. I literally used to Google: 'How to have sex with a woman if you are a woman.' When the time finally came when I'd be able to have sex with a woman, I kind of chickened out. I didn't let her go down on me and I didn't go down on her . I had no idea what I was doing. There was a lot of hand-stuff and messy-kissing all over the place. I didn't have an orgasm and I don't think she did either.
"It was still radical, though, because I was this closet-case high schooler with a paralyzing crush on my best friend and I had finally done something about it. After that, I started kissing more and more girls until the opportunity came again. The second time was definitely better.
Having sex with a woman for the first time (especially, I think, if you're a young gay like I was) can be really daunting. I worried about 'doing it right' until I learned how to communicate with my partners." — Brit, 25
"The first time I slept with a woman, I also slept with her husband. It was with my best friend’s sister. She’s been with her husband for over a decade, and he is the most painfully sexy man on the planet. One night, my friend’s sister and her husband propositioned me for a threesome . The three of us spent two steamy days rolling around together. My best friend still has no idea." — Angela*, 29
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in NYC. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.
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[Narrator] I was 18 and moved to New York for college.
In high school I was an overachiever.
did over 600 hours of volunteer work,
and in my senior year, I took eight classes
But college was going to be different.
I knew what I wanted and what I wanted was sex.
The on-ampus housing staff must've had a cruel sense
of humor because we had the same name.
But the similarities stopped there.
Her half of the closet was bright pink dresses
and my half was shades of gray skinny jeans.
She was so chipper and earnest and nice,
so I continually found reasons to blow her off.
I got what my doctor would later call
the worst case of mono I've ever seen
from a grungey guy I hooked up with
after pretending to like death metal.
So now I was bedridden and miserable.
I ended up spending a lot of time with my roommate.
Lindsay took care of me, bringing me protein shakes
with a straw when I was too sick to eat.
And suddenly we were great friends.
Once I recovered from my four month stint with mono,
I was wearing a dress and had some sort of
cleavage situation going on, trying so hard to fit into
my idea of what it meant to go out, hook up, flirt.
It all felt like such a costume and it was.
I think Lindsay even got me to dance,
but it was the most fun I'd had since I started college.
We went back to our dorm room that night
We hugged and the hug just never seemed to end.
Literally, we were just standing there in the middle of our
tiny room, embracing each other for maybe 20 minutes
longer, neither of us saying anything.
I asked her if she wanted to stay in my bed that night
so we could keep hugging, you know, as friends do.
So we're in this tiny twin bed and we're spooning,
I was surprisingly the little spoon,
I could feel her nod yes into the back of my neck.
Even more time goes by and I still haven't fallen asleep
and the sun is coming up and I ask her again, are you awake?
I ask her, do you want me to kiss you?
We couldn't stop, even after both of our mouths were dry
and the whole time I couldn't stop thinking,
what the fuck is happening right now?
This went on for months, slowly escalating
not only physically but emotionally,
hooking up in secret and still totally convinced
that we were both straight, we were just best friends,
this is totally just what best friends did.
Long story short, we're still roommates and best friends,
Since that first dorm room we've lived in
nine apartments together, upgrading from a twin dorm bed
to a full sized IKEA about a year ago.
When I started college, I felt so sure of what I wanted.
I wanted to have casual sex with guys, but here I am,
five years later, I don't wear dresses,
I'm always the big spoon, and I'm a lesbian.
Though not everything changed, I'm still a nerd
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