Wife Taking 3
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Wife Taking 3
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DEAR DEIDRE: I AGREED to a threesome with my wife to spice up our sex life but it’s left me feeling inadequate and I can’t stop replaying that evening in my mind.
My wife and I were talking about our sex life and agreed we’d got a bit stale.
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She said a threesome had always been a fantasy of hers and I agreed to give it a go.
I wasn’t keen on her preference that the third person should be a man but I didn’t want to block the whole idea.
She took the initiative and went online to find someone.
A guy responded who was very keen to join us.
He was 32. My wife is 29 and I’m 31.
We’ve been together since our late teens, so neither of us was very experienced when we got together.
When this guy turned up, we had a couple of drinks to relax us then went up to our bedroom.
As soon as he stripped off, I felt my wife had deliberately chosen someone very well-endowed.
I am small in that area and she knows I am self-conscious about it. She says she isn’t bothered about my size but the fact she had chosen this guy made me question that.
EVEN today, women often lack confidence in the bedroom.
They might like to surprise their man by taking the lead but porn can seem scary or unreal.
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When I later looked at his profile, he does brag about how well-endowed he is. I felt like a spectator for much of the threesome.
My wife didn’t pay me much attention and it left me feeling I was watching my worst horror show unfold as they had sex for nearly an hour.
My wife had several orgasms, though she’s always claimed to me she is unable to climax through intercourse. I felt inadequate, humiliated and betrayed.
I told her the next day I felt she was only interested in the other guy but she insisted it was all in my head.
I can’t really complain, as I agreed to the threesome — but I can’t stop thinking about it and it’s really getting me down.
This was before lockdown and we’ve had sex as normal since.
She hasn’t raised the idea of doing it again but now restrictions have eased I’m worried she will want a repeat performance.
I can’t shake off the feeling of inadequacy and that I agreed to being cheated on.
DEIDRE SAYS: You now know that a threesome brings with it real risks of being hurt, so be firm that you will not agree to one again.
Male size truly isn’t the secret of female orgasm. Only a minority of women can orgasm through intercourse alone.
It was probably the excitement of acting out her fantasy which led your wife to orgasm more easily but you can build fantasy into your sex life together to add excitement and variety.
My e-leaflet 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex has lots of ideas for two.
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Frankie Bridge bares her bum as she accuses Kim Kardashian of ‘stealing her look’
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Communities > Women's Health > My wife is masturbating 2 to 3 times a day 7 days a week
My wife and i have been happily married for 17 yrs, our relationship in and out of the bedroom is great. We have no sexual issues, foreplay,and no complaints. My wife during foreplay or oral sex will masturbate herself and rub her breast, and this helps her to orgasm, which i love and feel great seeing her do this and knowing she is fullfulling her desire. But her sex drive is 3 times mine, and i feel mine is at 100%,but i have noticed my wife is masturbating 2 to 3 times a day, and when we are together, i have seen her wake up from sleeping (dreaming) and start masturbating in the middle of the night, she will masturbate in the shower in the morning and when we go to bed at night. is this a problem or a phase for her?
My wife is 65 and has gone through menopause. Before she was all about sex and had sex with what she claims as almost 200 lovers. She s...
I have an almost non-existent clit (it's almost like a pit where the protruding clitoris should be) and a small clitoral hood. I have bee...
recently i have been masturbating a lot and feeling turned on. i’m not sexually active. i’ve never done it before until now. i haven’t do...
Okay so basically for the past 1 month I've been having this intense pressure inside my vagina when I finger myself and it's super uncomf...
If you've been married 17 years and she's been doing it 17 years, it would be a pretty long "phase." But if you feel this is new, then maybe it could be.
If you are both happy with the relationship and she is sexually satisfied the way things are, don't worry. She probably just finds the masturbatory experience helpful or satisfactory in a different way than having intercourse. (It's certainly easier.) Some people masturbate as a way to relieve stress, for example. If *she* is concerned that she has an addiction, then she could talk to a counselor about it, but if she has a perfectly functional life and the two of you are happy and have a good sex life, it just seems like it is not a problem.
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sarahshapiro1375
Sep 27, 2018
I would have said it's normal until I reached reading how frequent she does it. Did you talk to her at any point? You've been together for quite a long time and talking does a lot of magic. I wouldn't say something is wrong with her because there might also just be something wrong and not directly her. Try talking, though.
That sounds very much like my husband and myself. We have been married 26 years.
During sex I have been having more orgasms than in the past (up to 10), I still masterbate outside of that, sometimes because I get excited thinking about the sex we had. Lol
Do you also give her orgasms? Or do you usually just touch and watch. I know I like it better when my husband gets more actively involved in causing the orgasms.
I would just like to mention that it has been proven that men have their sexual peak at 18 - 19 years old and women have their sexual peak between 30 and 35 years old.
If the woman was a late bloomer, got her periods at 15 rather than 9, then having the sexual peak closer to 40 rather than 30 would also be normal. Men usually go through their midlife change around 35-50, it is not like menopause but it is usually the time when the sex drive decreases because his focus is more on other things. For the men, do you remember how much you masterbated/thought about six when you were 19? Was it the same as you do now at age 40? When I was 18, I only had sex/masterbated once every 3 months. When I was 33 I bugged my husband for sex every day!!!! Three times we went from 11 pm - 6-7 am in the morning!!! Women, unless you are thinking about cheating ORGASM AWAY! The most I've ever been able to do is 7 per night. And I totally agree with the other poster about thinking about the times I was with my husband is usually what gets me ready to go again! Even when alone I can finish longer/faster if I scream out his name!
She might just have a higher sex drive than you.
Thanks for the feedback....AnnieBrooke, i do agree with you and im glad you responded. i do feel the higher percentage for her is to relieve stress, i dont believe its an addiction in a negative way no. She seems to do it more in a relaxing atmosphere,bathing, shower or laying in bed. Shes not into toys and is not into the freakish/nympho catagory....lol....we are happy, and she never replaces her doing this for sex or intamacy with me. I just had never really known or heard of a woman masturbating that much, but i dont have an opinion either way as of too much or too little. And i do also agree....my wording "phase" was not a great definition of what i was asking, i do believe its not a phase too.
I am a woman and can tell you my sex drive is higher than any man I have encountered and I have tons or orgasms. I masturbate a lot and for longer than her probably. 1-4 hours at a time because my orgasms are so many. But I have to stop because of life things. I have been like this as far back as a kid of 8 when I discovered this ability touching myself. So there are others out there like us. I always want sex with my partner too. He can’t keep up. He doesn’t have to. She is totally okay and normal, just some of us enjoy the sensations a lot.
I don't really see how that's a problem. If she's happy and she's been doing it for as long as you say she has then I really wouldn't worry.
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My wife is 65 and has gone through menopause. Before she was all about sex and had sex with what she claims as almost 200 lovers. She s...
I have an almost non-existent clit (it's almost like a pit where the protruding clitoris should be) and a small clitoral hood. I have bee...
recently i have been masturbating a lot and feeling turned on. i’m not sexually active. i’ve never done it before until now. i haven’t do...
Okay so basically for the past 1 month I've been having this intense pressure inside my vagina when I finger myself and it's super uncomf...
John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAO Jun 08
John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAO 12/20
John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAO 04/18
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4 Surprising Benefits Of 'Wife Sharing'
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By Mike Hatcher — Written on Sep 17, 2021
When the term "wife sharing" is mentioned, many people will either choose to ignore the whole issue or discourage it. However, deep inside, many also desire to engage in it.
Society always portrays that a man should stick to one woman and a woman should stick to one man, so the notion or thought of a man sharing his wife with other men sexually is typically treated as taboo.
But, the truth remains that sharing your wife with another man, or experiencing another men sharing his wife with you, isn't necessarily a bad thing at all if all parties involved are excited and consenting.
It is a known fact that even so-called "marriages made in heaven" go through some storms. A time comes when your queen or love of your life stops being all that. It might be momentary, but it still affects you both.
In fact, many divorces are fuelled by a stale love life — with both partners having nothing to talk about, lacking energy, or feeling ignored.
Rather than being a victim of a boring bedroom, wife sharing can set you both on an exciting kinky adventure.
Let’s face it! Married life can become boring and monotonous . Sleeping and waking up every morning, seeing the same face. Putting up with the same old boring stories. Trying hard not to stare at your friend’s or neighbor’s wife.
Wife sharing is a great way to kill the monotony and boredom in married life. You, as well as your wife, will have something different to experiment with and talk about.
Sharing your wife is more than just widening your sexual experiences. It also helps in building trust .
You probably are asking yourself, how? Well, many men and women are involved in infidelity or unfaithfulness simply because their married life sucks.
Unfaithfulness brings mistrust in a marriage, but wife sharing allows a husband and wife to experiment with other people openly. The openness and transparency build trust among the couples.
In fact, a couple involved in wife sharing will not engage in other affairs without first informing their partner.
There is a saying that states "Experience is the best teacher." No matter how many books you read how many movies you watch, or visits you make to the marriage counselor, you are highly unlikely to salvage a stale relationship.
But, if you opt to experiment with other people's husbands and wives, you get to learn new things. In the end, you become much wiser and more open-minded.
If you are in agreement and practice safe sex then yes, wife sharing can be healthy.
Monogamy isn't for everyone , but wife sharing is also not for everyone.
Be sure to talk it over together openly and establish rules and boundaries. If you easily get jealous or are a bit on the territorial side, this lifestyle may not be for you.
But while many people choose to not talk about it, and if they do, they talk in hush tones, sharing wives is becoming more accepted. Many people are already doing it secretly. Some have even given it names such as wife exchange, wife swapping, and more. This desire is fuelled by the factors mentioned above.
Rather than trying to fight the truth of what turns you both on, it's probably high time to accept the truth and consider a new adventure together.
Mike Hatcher is a sex coach who has been in the Lifestyle for many years and has written about open relationships, swinging, and sex and relationship advice for alternative sex lives.
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