Wife Sauna
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Wife Sauna
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Can’t you just feel the warmth through the screen? Image: Depositphotos
Eating breakfast in your bathrobe? Yes. Image: Depositphotos
Unexpected side-effect: saunas will make you feel amazing in your own skin. Image: Depositphotos
Lucy is a thirty something wannabe blogger, mum of 3 who fell in love with a Dutchie and followed him around the world before settling down in Assen. Loves wine, good food and saturday night dancing. Continuously extolling the virtues of a dutchified lifestyle.
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A sauna in the Netherlands may sound like the perfect way to relax — until you walk in and everyone is butt naked.
Yes, you’ve read that right. Stark, bollock naked. No bikini, no swimsuit, nada . But don’t be alarmed if your work colleague or mum-friend from school suggests a visit.
Visiting a sauna or spa in the Netherlands can actually be a really fun, liberating experience. We promise.
I have been lucky enough to visit a few different Dutch saunas during my time here. I have to say, these places are amazing. You’ll find a huge variety of swimming pools, steam rooms, jacuzzis, and of course, saunas.
They also normally have these ‘relax rooms’ equipped with full-size beds and blankets that are simply screaming for you to lay down, relax and nap for hours on end.
But don’t panic that the occupant before you has laid in the bad naked! Everyone gets provided with a bathrobe and slippers (or you can take your own). In the public areas, most people will keep their robes on, and only disrobe to go into the saunas or steam rooms.
Although, you do get the odd few who like to walk around the whole time in their birthday suit. Personally, I like to keep myself wrapped in a bathrobe most of the time. It can get a little chilly walking from sauna to sauna, especially since many are set across huge outdoor grounds.
So, there really is no obligation to be naked at all. Don’t worry!
Most of the spas I’ve been to have a selection of restaurants and bars dotted across their premises. This means that you get to enjoy a glass of wine or some Dutch snacks when all that relaxing is making you hungry.
If you prefer something more substantial, some spas even offer three-course meals or a full buffet (you know how the Dutch just love a buffet).
And the best bit, you are all sitting around munching on your goodies in your bathrobe. No need to get changed! Just imagine biting into your portion of bitterballen knowing your own bitterballen are hanging free. Win-Win!
No need to worry about voyeurs and weirdoes who secretly try to film you lying back legs akimbo (please don’t do this!!) in the sauna. There is a strict no mobile phones and cameras allowed policy, which they will enforce.
Plus, the age range in these spas tends to average in the higher figures, many of whom still have no clue how to work a Nokia 7710, let alone the latest iPhone or Samsung camera.
The first time I went to a naked sauna I’d just undergone a C-section and was incredibly self-conscious. I imagined everyone would be staring at my scar (as well as my dimpled thighs and a rather large backside).
But I seriously needn’t have worried. When everybody is naked you actually realise that in REAL LIFE everybody looks different, but also exactly the same. We all have boobs and vajayjays, willies and bums.
Some are saggier, some are bigger, some tummies are rounder, and some legs are slimmer. But who cares. I walked out of that spa feeling 10 feet high and could see for myself where that Dutch confidence comes from.
Word of advice : when picking a spa or sauna to visit, it’s always worth choosing one a little further away. No matter how confident I am, I have zero desire to see my kids’ school teachers/bank manager/mother-in-law whilst we are both naked, having to pretend like we’re not.
All in all, going to a sauna in the Netherlands is one hell of an experience! Have you ever been to one before? Let us know in the comments below!
Feature Image: Nkaminetskyy /Pixabay Editor’s note: This article was originally published in September 2018 and was fully updated in July 2022 for your reading pleasure.
[…] restaurant to drink wine and you can even lay outside to work on your (all over) tan! Yes, you are naked in a Dutch sauna… but to be honest, I am a real prude when it comes to nudity, but this experience is one not to […]
Going to the saunas is my idea of a night out in Amsterdam.
Last time I was at Zuiver Spa, I met a delightful young lady in the (moderate temperature) salt sauna, and we she was delightful because she was, like me, singing in a choir So we exchanged experiences from swedish and dutch choirs, and egged on by the others in the sauna, we also sang ‘typical’ folk tunes and choir works to each other. The acoustics in this sauna was even superb for singing Anyway, Zuiver Spa really IS social nudity. Love the place, have always had good experiences meeting nice people there thansk to the wonderful and very relaxed atmosphere. And the combination of raw concrete and lot’s of green plants is strangely beautiful.
I would literally be ….Naked and afraid.:-)
Nice writing! However, as a Finnish person I have to just correct few things. First of all, since sauna comes from Finland it is not really a dutch activity (I know only few dutchies who actually have gone to sauna in The Netherlands) and there are no such things as dutch saunas (so you should maybe correct that to the text as country of origin;)). I have not visited saunas in the Netherlands yet but what I have heard, you are not e.g. allowed to throw the water to the stones yourself. If you want to experience authentic Finnish sauna, there are many of those in the Netherlands rented by actual Finnish people. I however am glad how you brought out the nudity aspect being natural and how to be proud of our bodies! It’s super natural in our culture and we go there with friends (mixed sexes) since there is nothing sexual about it and everyone are there just to relax. Great text anyways but I just had to come and correct a little. Have a nice day!
BUB…..the holy hell are you babbling about?????? so somehow you finns have the global patent on a sauna……AND maybe you’re waiting for your royalties from us canadians????? So how long EXACTLY are your finnish rules????? AND why would you think we give a good god-damn????????
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Saturday 13 August 10:00 - Sunday 16 October 23:00
A trip to the Netherlands is not complete without some flower sights, and why not add the mighty dunes to the mix for some extra Dutch spice? Renzy’s
A trip to the Netherlands is not complete without some flower sights, and why not add the mighty dunes to the mix for some extra Dutch spice? Renzy’s Dune & Summer Flower Tour is the thing to do this fall!
Renzy ‘s self-guided, fully electric vehicles will take you around the beautiful Dutch landscape this summer and autumn. Prepare for three hours of mind-blowing sights, in a comfortable vroomer !
Experience the gorgeous show gardens filled with summer flowers, and beat the tourist crowds that dominate the spring, with a summer/autumn ride with Renzy.
You can easily book your Renzy tour on their website, and enjoy the self-guided tours well into October.
One vehicle will have space for you, and one other person, and the three-hour tour costs €85 in total. Want a sneaky discount? Use the early-bird discount code “DR-summerflower2022” for 10% off!
Tuesday 13 September 19:00 - Tuesday 13 September 21:00
Found yourself moving to the beautiful country of the Netherlands? Congratulations! We know the first few days can be hectic, especially if you don’t know a word of
Found yourself moving to the beautiful country of the Netherlands? Congratulations! We know the first few days can be hectic, especially if you don’t know a word of Dutch.
But don’t worry, Koentact is having an Open Day, and they’ll get you from “Sorry, I don’t speak Dutch” to breaking the ice with sentences like “ Ik ben [naam]. Hoe gaat het met je?” (I am [name]. How are you?) in no time.
Koentact is an Amsterdam-based Dutch language school with a fun and interactive approach to teaching Dutch.
The school will host an Open Day on September 13 for everyone who’s interested in learning how to perfect that guttural ‘g’ and more.
During the Open Day, you’ll be able to:
Curious about their services? It’s easy to sign up — all you need to do is go to Koentact’s website and fill in the Open Day registration form with your contact details, level of Dutch, and any other questions you may have.
When: September 13, 19.00 to 21:00 Where: Da Costastraat 36, Amsterdam Cost: €0 How do I register?: Easy! Just fill in the registration form on their website.
So, what are you waiting for? Join Koentact for their language Open Day and learn all the Dutch phrases you need to introduce yourself while you’re in the Netherlands.
Will you join Koentact for their Open Day in September? Tell us in the comments!
Koentact
Elandsgracht 70, 1016TX Amsterdam
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