Wife Guys

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Is a wife guy born or is wife guyness thrust upon him?

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A few weeks ago, the term “wife guy” was barely a glint in the internet’s eye—a recurring online character that did not yet really have a name, much less a whole discourse around him. Well, as of last week, there were at least five major pieces that dug into the subject, attempting to define it and diagnose what it means for society. Five! What’s responsible for this sudden explosion of wife guy content (aside from choreplay wife guy , who I think sent writers over the edge)? And what can we learn from it? Read on for some Cliff [Wife] Notes.
Several of the articles about wife guys aimed to present us with a conclusive definition of the concept. “Wife Guys are the men who make themselves famous for things their wives did, or qualities their wives have or had,” New York magazine explained. Per the Outline, a wife guy is “a man who has become ridiculous through his involvement in something wife-related and has happened to become known online.” The New York Times went with “a man who has risen to prominence online by posting content about his wife.” Commonly cited examples from the pieces include curvy wife guy and elf wife guy .
As some of the definitions take care to reflect, the wife guy’s relationship to the wife that he … is the wife guy of? … isn’t as clear-cut as it may initially sound. Things get ambiguous: It’s not actually required that the wife guy be married to the wife in any given scenario, just that there is a wife, and it’s also not certain whether the wife guy himself needs to have posted the original content to qualify as a bona fide wife guy. Is a wife guy born, or is wife guyness thrust upon him? The aforementioned curvy wife guy is quite clearly the one in the driver’s seat on his wife journey, posting Instagrams and even a music video about his wife, but other wife guys, like don’t-email-my-wife guy , named for the viral photo of a garage with the words “don’t email my wife” spray-painted on it, arise from the internet back alleys of social media and Reddit, their identities severed from the feats of legendary wife guyliness that they represent. These loopholes expand the pool of wife guys, and it is in the interests of the chronicler of the wife guy for the definition of the term to be looser, because the more wife guys there are, the more chances the writer has to prove that is a real category of guy worthy of discussion.
The other two so-called wife guy articles, in Mel and the New Yorker, didn’t provide clear definitions of the wife guy because they aren’t even really about wife guys; they are about wives. It’s an important point: Whether study of this phenomenon should focus on the wife guy or the wife herself remains a central question. When you think about it, wife or wife guy is a philosophical debate on the level of chicken or the egg. Usually we don’t actually know anything about the wife other than that she is a wife, because the wife guy is speaking for her. But then, wife guy is only interesting because he got a wife, somehow. We could go back and forth on this forever.
How does one illustrate the concept of a wife guy? The most straightforward way, chosen by New York magazine, is a still of a wife guy and his wife (here, Mr. and Mrs. Cliff Wife ). The Outline used the photo that constitutes the entirety of the don’t-email-my-wife guy’s persona. A picture of Borat gets the message across for the New Yorker. I confess I don’t know who is pictured in Mel’s art, but presumably they are wife guys? But anyway, they are covered in lava and melting. Perhaps photography is too literal a medium to communicate this abstract sort of guy: To go with its piece, the New York Times published an illustration of a colorful bride and groom kissing, where the groom is holding up a smartphone over the bride’s shoulder, capturing a photo of the two. It reminds me a lot of the famous photo of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez kissing at the Oscars , in which Ben Affleck’s eyes are clearly trained somewhere other than on Lopez. Was Bennifer-era Affleck the original wife guy?
On capitalizing “wife guy”: The articles were also split on this. For capitalization: New York magazine, the Outline, the New Yorker. Against: the New York Times (and, I guess, Slate, I just decided).
Did not actually use the term “wife guy” in its article: Mel.
Number of these articles that cited @dril, the popular pseudonymous Twitter account known for its humor: three of the five.
How @dril is introduced in each of them: “the prophet” (Mel); “Twitter bard and my nomination for the Nobel Prize” (the Outline); “weird Twitter account” (the New York Times).
Why are all the wives and wife guys, and the articles about them, emerging now? Well, for one, writers have to post every day; you got anything better? But also because it’s always fun to discover that there is a new type of “guy,” and you can analyze what this means about “how we live now.” And when you can fit ideas about the state of gender and marriage in too? Chef’s kiss. You’re telling me a stupid online thing can reflect “a deeply ambivalent state of heterosexual coupling” (the New York Times) or that “commitment [is] barely necessary at this point in the Western history of sexual romance” (Mel)? That’s every culture writer’s dream.
Honestly, all the wife and wife guy articles were good reads. Did the internet need five of them? Perhaps not, but it’s a fitting tribute to the wife guy, who is not known for his restraint. All that knowledge lets us build on the old adage that behind every great man is a great woman: It turns out that if that woman is a wife, there just might be a wife guy behind her . And then behind that wife guy? Another shrewd and informative article about wife guys.
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Rise of the 'Wife Guy': Men who post about their partners at the center of a viral trend
Rise of the 'Wife Guy': Men who post about their partners at the center of a viral trend
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Mikey Mosher is a self-proclaimed "wife guy."
While less Instagram-famous than the viral versions of partner-obsessed men before him, Mosher floods his follower's timelines with content about his girlfriend – including but not limited to her looking at stained-glass windows or lying with her eyes closed on the beach.
There are several solo photos of her on his Instagram account, often with no caption, and on Twitter, he retweets comments like, "After much deliberation, I have decided to stan, my own girlfriend." For the record, 'stan' refers to being an overzealous fan of a particular person.
Mosher says the wife guy title suits him because "there’s this whole movement around being obsessed with your wife and being very outwardly open about loving her on social media," the 25-year-old from Massachusetts said. "I noticed that, and I post about my girlfriend a lot, and I guess that makes me a wife guy."
In June, The New York Times published a story titled, " The Age of the Internet ‘Wife Guy,’ " where the writer explores the latest social media phenomenon – men being praised, then mocked, for being openly consumed by the lives of their significant others.
The definition of wife guy is somewhat loose.
It's fair to say that he is more than just an ordinary husband, spouse or boyfriend.
He may incessantly post photos of his wife online, he may be accused of over-celebrating his partner's achievements or he may go viral for curating entire music videos dedicated to his affinity for her body.
In some cases, it encompasses the personas of recurring online characters who appear to partly define themselves through exaggerated reactions to being in a union with a female. The Times defined the category of men as existing "at the intersection of relationship status and influencer branding."
According to the Outline , a wife guy is "defined by the fact that they have done something which involves a wife, whether their own or someone else’s.” And New York magazine says wife guys are the men "who make themselves famous for things their wives did, or qualities their wives have or had."
The subject can be confusing, though, because the internet amplifies some wife guys who are divorced and others who aren't even real.
" Elf Wife Guy " became part of the social conversation after he blocked his wife on Twitter, and " Fake Wife Guy " was a man who posed as his wife on social media until the two were going through a divorce. " Cliff Wife Guy " joined the club over Memorial Day weekend when he posted a video of his wife falling down a cliff. She turned out to be OK, and he told USA TODAY in an email that he "wasn't a fan of the spin the internet took on an actual scary situation involving my family."
Following Curvey Wife Guy, Cliff Wife Guy, and Elf Wife Guy, I am calling for a total and complete shutdown of marriages in the United States until our country's representatives can figure out what the heck is going on.
The consensus seems to be that the everyday lives of women give wife guys a wider platform, and a large part of his digital identity is based on the woman he has in his life.
Perhaps the resurgence in popularity of Borat Voice " My Wife " has contributed to the spread of "wife guy" humor. Actor-comedian Sacha Baron Cohen's character Borat coined the catchphrase in the 2006 movie "Borat! Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan."
"After being a popular reference to the film in the years following its release, it grew into an ironic signifier for a poor sense of humor, referenced in pop culture" and later parodied on Twitter, according to Know Your Meme , a website tracking viral content.
Or maybe the phenomenon was advanced by today's women's movement, with men using their wives to publicly declare that they are feminists and allies. Relationship experts say that the trend could also be attributed to a man's need to be approved and validated from outside sources, among other circumstances.
"If the relationship is in its infancy, it's a natural response to say, 'Look at what I’ve achieved, I’ve been able to marry this kind, beautiful and ambitious woman,'" said Patrick Wanis, human behavior and relationship expert. "But when it becomes obsessive or appears to be extreme then the motivation could be one of two things: deep insecurity ... or the person is trying to tell other people, ‘Hey, look I’m taken.’"
Robbie Trip is probably the most famous wife guy out there. In fact, he's widely credited as being one of the first.
After posting content about his love for his girlfriend, now wife, for years, the 28-year-old was launched into internet fame when he shared a photo on Instagram about how much he adored his "curvy" wife in 2017.
Two years later, he released a music video titled “Chubby Sexy" that rubbed some people the wrong way, with some accusing him of objectifying women. Since going viral, he told USA TODAY that "a majority of the time" the term wife guy has been used "in a mocking way to denigrate the guy in the relationship – that somehow he would be nothing without his wife or that he is less of a man because he so adores his wife."
Tripp said that the song's backlash is outweighed by the public support from men and women who understand his central message of female empowerment. In a tweet, Tripp called the video a "body-positive curvy girl summer anthem."
Tripp said becoming what people refer to as a wife guy was "a natural transition."
“I think the whole concept of the wife guys is funny. With social media today, everything has to be a thing," Tripp said. "I’m a writer. I’m a poet. I’m a romantic soul. If you scroll all the way back to 2013, that type of post was always typical on my feed. I posted about me marrying the woman of my dreams – me loving her."
I love curvy women and curvy women love me. 🎥🍑🔥🎶💛🙌🏼 Body positive curvy girl summer anthem dropping soon... pic.twitter.com/HxbqvdRtPq
As time progressed, Tripp leveraged his social media fame into brand deals including Dunkin’-themed sneakers. His wife, Sarah , is also a social media influencer.
While he has never referred to himself as a wife guy, Tripp says, "Now that the internet has made it a thing, there’s no doubt that I am the king, the pioneer of the wife guy. Every other is a trending blip that people on Twitter like to laugh about. This is my career."
While some people use the term "wife guy" as an insult, Tripp says, "There are worse things to be known as than a guy who loves his wife."
Follow Dalvin Brown on Twitter: @Dalvin_Brown.

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The latest PC outrage is that terrible husbands, especially those in the public eye, are praising their wives. Yes, that’s right, these awful men are saying nice things about their better halves, and they’re being annoyingly effusive about it. We can’t let them get away with it!
There’s even a new name for them: “wife guys.”
The term has been circulating on woke Web sites for some time, but lately it has crossed over into the mainstream.
In The New York Times last month , Amanda Hess offered this account of the latest enemy of wokeness: “The wife guy defines himself through a kind of overreaction to being married. His wife hurt herself, and he filmed it. He is sexually attracted to his wife, and he talks about it as if he were some kind of hero.
“The wife guy is a mutation of the ‘Instagram husband,’ the man who exists to take flattering photos of his wife, except that the wife guy is no longer content behind the scenes. He is crafting a whole persona around being that guy. He married a woman, and now that is his personality.”
The term was once relegated to men who “used” their wives to gain stature for themselves, in particular on social media. But now it’s any guy who admits to being into his wife.
It isn’t just traditional-conservative men who dare praise their wives and thereby raise liberal ire. Several of the Democratic presidential candidates answered “my wife” when asked by The New York Times to name their personal hero. John Delaney, Seth Moulton, Jay Inslee, Beto O’Rourke and Steve Bullock gave that answer to the Times and this, for some reason, was cause for criticism.
On The Cut site, Madeleine Aggeler rips into these candidates as “the type of man who calls his wife his hero as a way of acknowledging the fact that he has forced her to shoulder the responsibilities of their family life alone while he pursues his political dreams, in exchange for which she will face intrusive and overwhelming public scrutiny. (My hero!)”
That we have no idea what’s going on in each of these marriages is irrelevant. Delaney met his wife in law school, and she went on to found her own “international, satellite-based, Internet-services company.” Perhaps she’s his hero because she’s super-smart and accomplished.
It used to be considered anti-feminist to assume women are only capable of raising families. What happened?
Aggeler then proceeds to rate the “wife guy” quotient of each American president. Somehow President Bill Clinton is a “wife guy,” whereas President Barack Obama isn’t. James Madison, “wife guy.” Millard Fillmore, not.
We women can read these attacks on men and laugh. But for men, it’s just a continuing pummeling of them that comes no matter what they do.
A 2016 University of Melbourne study found that women on Facebook used the word “husband” a lot, while men used “wife” far less frequently. Chris Matyszczyk at CNET called this “troubling.”
If they don’t talk about their wives, they’re bad. If they do talk about their wives, they’re also bad.
Behind the attack on “wife guys,” I suspect, lurks a hostility to wifehood and marriage in general. Jia Tolentino made that hostility explicit in The New Yorker last month: “The very word is freighted with a history that I would prefer not to join, one in which women have been asked to conceive of their systemic subservience to men as a pleasure and a calling — to make a badge of honor out of a badge of woe.”
There’s no winning for men. We don’t take these kinds of shots at women and the way they conduct themselves in their relationships, but it’s standard and acceptable to take them at men.
It’s OK, “wife guys”: Praise your wives, call them your “heroes,” talk about how great they are. Don’t let the think-piece harridans and mocking labels stop you.
Most importantly, make sure your wife enjoys your wife-guyness. That’s really what it’s all about.

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