Wife Fantasies Sex

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Wife Fantasies Sex
By Alexis Jones and Jasmine Gomez Published: Sep 28, 2021
This content is imported from poll. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
This content is imported from poll. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
Jasmine Gomez Associate Commerce Editor
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Picture your hottest, toe-curling, clutch-the-sheets-because-it-feels- that -good sexual fantasy. Maybe it's a steamy secret you've kept under wraps, or maybe your partner knows exactly what you've been dreaming of. Whether you're a bit on the shy side or just haven't had the time, pretty much everyone has a sexual fantasy they'd love to make a romping reality.
Of course, spicing up your relationship (or hookup!) is easier said than done. Living out a common sexual fantasy sounds like a ton of fun, but before you stock up your Amazon cart with whips and chains, make sure to have a conversation with your partner first.
"Playfully tell your partner that you have fantasies you would like to share with them," says Ava Cadell, PhD , clinical sexologist and AASECT-certified sex counselor. "If they give you the go ahead, then tell them your fantasies, starting with the mild ones." Beginning with tamer fantasies, like watching each other striptease, can put both of you at ease before exploring something more risqué, Cadell says.
And, word to the wise, don't just lay it on them five minutes before a work meeting. Timing is everything, says Cadell: "The best time to talk to your partner about your fantasies is when you feel comfortable." That could be on a long road trip, a romantic date, or even after making love. (There's always next time, after all!)
Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC , a psychotherapist specializing in intimacy, sex and relationships, says the key is making sure your relationship is strong enough to handle a common sex fantasy and that it's something both you and your partner are into.
"Many times the fantasy involves taking in a third person," Rapini says. In that ~hypothetical~ situation, one person may want it while the other doesn't because they either feel insecure about the relationship or are worried about their partner's attachment style . That's why Mary Jo recommends experimenting with a lower-stakes playful fantasy first (think: dressing up) before committing to something like a hot and heavy threesome.
But honestly, it's totally up to you and your boo. Think you're ready to get frisky? Here are 30 sex fantasy ideas you can try (or at least start planning) tonight.
For many of Cadell's clients, sometimes just talking about the fantasy is satisfying enough. These games give you a framework for doing just that.
1. Fantasy fun cards: Write down all your sexual fantasies on a stack of cards and get your lover to do the same. Then, each partner should sort all their cards into two separate piles: 1: Fantasies to turn into reality, such as having sex in a public place, or being a sex slave. 2: Fantasies to remain only as fantasies, such as group sex or having sex with someone of the same sex. "Expressing your sexual fantasies can be a huge part of foreplay—or it can be the main event," Cadell says.
2. Bring in the paint: "Play a sexy version of the game Pictionary where you and your partner take turns drawing different fantasies," Cadell says. Each person will get five turns to try and guess what the other is drawing in under a minute. You can draw stick figures or sketch drawings of your fantasies such as a Playboy Bunny Rock Star, Sexy Maid, or Butler.
3. Try fantasy charades: "Play a game of fantasy charades where you get to act out your favorite fantasies without speaking," Cadell says. "See if your partner can guess what you are trying to tell them through your actions and movements." Got props? Use them to help your partner guess your fantasy. For example, if you have a cop fantasy, get some handcuffs. If you’re a doctor or nurse, get some latex gloves, and if you’re little red riding hood, get a red cape with a picnic basket.
4. Ask your partner to play fantasy fortune telling : "Try this verbal fantasy game to test both your creativity and imagination," Cadell says. Start off with a timer and give each person 20 seconds. Flip a coin and the winner will begin to describe a sex fantasy scenario like a threesome or anal fantasy. After 20 seconds, switch and their partner will continue the fantasy for another 20 seconds. "Do this for five turns and see what erotic ideas you come up with. At the end, you can decide if it’s a fantasy you want to live out," Cadell says.
5. Act out a famous sex scene from a movie. Okay, this isn't exactly a game per sé, but it will put you and your partner's acting chops to the test in a fun and sexy way. Consider this the ultimate role play, whether you stick to the prepared script or improvise. Your call.
Fantasy is all about escape. So take the opportunity to be someone else in the bedroom the next time you and your partner are feeling playful.
6. Boss and Employee: According to Your Tango , 56 percent of women and 61 percent of men have sexual fantasies having sex with co-workers in their office. Play out that fantasy out with your partner (and keep your job!) by grabbing your work outfit, pretending you're at your desk, and letting your partner show you what it means to work overtime.
7 . Nurse: A woman who wants to turn their partner on by wearing a naughty nurse’s outfit can be sexy and get into character by examining her partner’s body from head to toe. "Then she can explore various erogenous zones and ask her patient for feedback on what feels better, a nip, a lick, or a caress?" Cadell says. (BTW: This works if your partner plays the nurse, too.)
8. Police Officer : Using a pair of handcuffs for restraint could be exciting, followed by body search and punishment to fit the crime.
9. Sports players: Is your boo a Pats fan? Grab a Tom Brady jersey for him and referee outfit for you (or vice-versa). When you get home, get ready to call all the plays.
10. Dominatrix: " 50 Shades of Grey gave women permission to live out their Dom and Sub fantasies," Cadell says. "It makes them feel uninhibited and more confidant sexually when their lover is blindfolded." If that's you, then why don't try to bring out your inner dominatrix on sex fantasy night with the BF.
11. Personal trainer: Does working out turn you on? Bring that energy into the bedroom by grabbing your partner and demanding they give you 10 reps...of the move of your choosing.
12. Professor and student: This role-play sitch also allows you to play with power dynamics, and there's no requirement that the teacher be in control. You can even pretend one partner is a graduated student returning to their old school for a long-overdue romp...
What many of Rapini's couples say they crave in their fantasies is "deviant or on the fringe behavior." So the next time you're itching to get caught in the act, try one of these scandalous activities.
13. Have sex outside: " Take a walk on the wild side and role-play exhibitionism and public sex," Cadell says. Sneak away with your partner to a secluded place where you won’t get caught, and have at it. "The rush of being outdoors just might be an intoxicating adventure you’ll never forget," Cadell says.
14. Join the mile high club: A recent survey from Stratos Jet Charters polled 2,000 people and found that almost 17 percent have already done something sexual on a flight —and 52 percent had fantasized about it. So why not join the club?
15. Try it on a boat. If you're going to tackle land and air, why not try the sea, too? There's something about that misty ocean air that really gets people hot and bothered. Plus, you know what they say about "the motion of the ocean."
16. Have sex with a stranger: Well, kind of! "Set up a seduction scenario with your partner at a local bar, and be sure to arrive separately," Cadell says. Then it's all about the pursuit. Maybe they drop a seduction line or send over a drink from the other side of the bar. "Let the actor inside fuel this fantasy," Cadell says.
17. Have a threesome: One in seven Americans have had a threesome, according to a 2015 study . What's more—one in five find them appealing. So if you've been thinking about bringing another person into the bedroom, you're not alone. Just be mindful of Rapini's earlier tips. And make sure it's something both you and your partner want to do.
18. Participate in group sex: Ditto, all of the above. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page, and keep safety and consent in mind. If you want to do this somewhere where there may be other couples who share your interest in consensual non-monogamy, trying heading to a sex resort .
19. Make a sex tape: Cadell gives this one two thumbs up. "Grab your movie camera and act out a porn scene by filming you and your lover as porn stars," she says. And then after, set up your tripod or connect your camera to the TV so you can watch your moves (make sure the kids aren't around!). Just make sure to remain playful when doing something like this, Rapini says. "Couples often end up blaming each other when someone doesn't 'commit enough' or they're left feeling disappointed." But it's all supposed to be fun, she says.
Maybe your partner does too? There's only one way to find out...
20. Be voyeuristic: In a recent study from The Journal of Sex Research , 46 percent of the people surveyed were into watching people have sex. So if you're into this too, try going to a nude beach or a sex show with your partner.
21. Be an exhibitionist: Feeling really bold? Th e next time you're in the grocery store wearing your favorite skirt, lock eyes with your partner and slowly remove your underwear.
22. Watch each other masturbate: Cadell recommends combining this fantasy with a sex tape. "Be the director and direct your lover in a masturbation scene," she says. That way you're checking off two fantasy boxes.
23. Bring in the vibrators: Rapini recommends this one all the time. "If your partner has a fantasy about vibrators or inviting them into love making with your vibrator, I think that's something that can actually enhance your sex life," she says. Your partner will get to know allll t he right places.
24. Put on a strip tease: One by one, take off an article of clothing as your partner watches you from across them room (Think: Blair Waldorf at Victrola in Gossip Girl . You know the scene!)
25. Go to the strip club: Here's a fun one, but it does depend on how secure you are in your relationship. Do you get jealous when your partner looks at another woman? Or will you use unleash your inner Ramona from Hustlers and get on the pole?
26. Explore squirting: This might be easier said that done for some, but you may discover nothing is hotter than having your partner watching you in full glory. Ready to try it? Here's a how-to guide .
Then give BDSM a try. Just make sure you've had an honest conversation with your partner about it first, making sure to discuss what it is, what you want, and how far you're willing to go.
27. Grab the whip: You don't need to go 50 Shades on your partner, but if both of you have been fantasizing about whipping or being whipped, there's nothing wrong with that.
28. Use a blindfold: This is a common one for Rapini's clients, especially during oral sex. There's something about one person in control and the other being completely surprised that really turn couples on. If that's you, grab the blindfold and give it a go.
Sometimes it's doing everything but sex that really turns Rapini's clients on, she says. And there are plenty of fun ways to tempt and tease.
29. Wear a sexy pair of heels: Does your partner have a thing for shoes, or maybe red heels in particular? Rapini knows several clients who do. So the next time you're at the mall, invest in a killer pair of red pumps, she says. And when you're sitting across from them at the dinner table, slowly glide the tip of your shoe up and down their legs. Then watch them squirm (hehe!)
30. Bring in the body chocolate: Are you into oral stimulation? So is everyone else, Rapini says. "A lot of partners are very oral," Rapini says. "They have fantasies of licking frosting or chocolate off their partners body." Why else do you think chocolate flavored body pain exists? Go buy some and get to licking.
Alexis Jones is an assistant editor at Women's Health where she writes across several verticals on WomensHealthmag.com , including life, health, sex and love, relationships and fitness, while also contributing to the print magazine. She has a master’s degree in journalism from Syracuse University, lives in Brooklyn, and proudly detests avocados.
Jasmine Gomez is the Associate Commerce Editor at Women’s Health and covers health, fitness, sex, culture and cool products. She enjoys karaoke and dining out more than she cares to admit.
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Every woman is different. But if you're mystified about what she wants in bed, this is a good place to start.
There are some things she won't tell you. Maybe she's too shy, too polite, or too afraid to hurt your feelings. So we asked hundreds of women to open up, anonymously. Brace yourself — and get ready to learn a lot, from the women and the experts alike. Then use the intel to make your love life hotter than ever. She'll thank you.
Submission and domination fantasies are common among both genders, the Journal of Sexual Medicine reports. In fact, 65 percent of women want to be sexually dominated. "I want him to pull my hair," one woman told Men's Health, while another chimed in, "I love it rough, and I mean really rough."
Suggest Fifty Shades for movie night, says sex therapist Holly Richmond, Ph.D. Yeah, we know, it's cliché, but it's a solid segue. Say "Feel free to laugh, but it's time I learn what the fuss is about," or be flattering and flirty: "I'd like to try that on you."
One fantasy you may share: her with another woman. Over half of women fessed up to this one — "girl-on-girl porn is a turn-on," one woman confided — while 58 percent of men in a separate Men's Health Twitter poll want a threesome with their mate and another woman.
"Make it personal: Say the thought of her with another woman turns you on," says sex educator Tina Horn. Watch lesbian and threesome porn with her, but if you're serious about having a threesome IRL, "talk boundaries first."
In our poll, 63 percent of women wished to be kissed more. "He doesn't like making out and it sucks," one woman wrote. "He'll do it if I ask, but barely uses his tongue. I want him to grab me and kiss me, I want to feel that he means it."
When deep kissing only happens in foreplay, you lose the benefits of those great makeout sessions of your early days, says Aleece Fosnight, a sexuality counselor.
Try this: Kiss her for two minutes. That's long enough for nerve receptors in the lips to signal the release of feel-good neurotransmitters. It also increases testosterone, boosting energy and libido.
Fantasizing about someone else is normal, says Richmond. Think of it this way: She's helping herself climax, which means she values having good orgasmic sex with you. Thoughts are not realities; you're the one she wants inside her. (Same goes for your thoughts, so drop the guilt and enjoy them.)
Many women told us they secretly enjoy frequent battery-powered pleasure — and in our survey, 23 percent said they hide sex toys from their mate. (Too bad — men like to watch.) "I have a much higher sex drive than he does, and I have to take care of myself more than he knows," one woman confessed.
Make sex toy shopping a kinky date night, either in person (try the welcoming Adam & Eve store) or online, says Richmond. Ask the staff plenty of questions; they're used to it. If something turns her (or you) on, go for it.
Try the We-Vibe Sync, created for couples. Its C-shape stimulates her clitoris and G-spot during sex. You'll feel the sensation as well.
More than four in 10 women admit this. "I faked almost every orgasm with him the past year," one woman said.
Don't confront her; instead, ask what she likes, or better yet, have her show you, says sex therapist David Ortmann, L.C.S.W. Say, "I'd love to watch you touch yourself — it would be so hot and help me learn how to touch you."
While she's masturbating, kiss her neck, touch her nipples, caress the back of her knees. Note what she looks like when she comes, and copy some of her touch techniques. Ask easy questions so she can stay in the moment, says psychologist Erica Marchand, Ph.D. "Faster or slower?" "Softer or harder?" Not "What should I do?" Remember, the clitoris is tiny, so small changes make a big difference.
Seven out of 10 women are eager to try something new. Many women said they were interested in trying rimming, as well as "crazy, crazy wild positions. Would be funny just to try them!," one woman wrote.
Make sexual "menus," suggests sex therapist Michael Aaron. You each write down types of sex you're excited to try (green light), curious but nervous to try (yellow), or that are off-limits (red). Then you each pick one green and one yellow from the other's menu. It's fun and helps you practice negotiation, says Aaron.
Apps such as Let's Try It are like this (you each fill out a sex questionnaire, and mutual desires are revealed), but paper is intimate and bonding. "The unknown can really be a turn-on," says sex therapist Michael Salas. "Discovering new things about our partner not only energizes us erotically but it energizes the connection as well."
Don't assume she's not in the mood. Seven out of 10 women told us they want sex more often, and more romance. I'd want sex more often if it wasn't so chore-like. Seduce me, turn me on!," one woman wrote.
Richmond suggests romantic (and dirty) talk throughout the day. "Foreplay can last all day," she says. Or set up a regular date night. "Dress up. Make an effort, like when you were first dating. Relax and have fun, keeping the tone flirty and romantic. Turn on the charm and curiosity as if you just met. Candles and music are clich
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