Why therapy might actually harm you
Psychotherapy is becoming more and more popular in society today: people find therapists for them, send to therapy their spouses and children. Many describe their therapy as something wonderful and life-changing, but there are also people who think therapy isn’t work. Someone had a terrible experience, others just think it's a scam, many people think it's extremely overrated. Some people continue on endless sessions for years, until one day they finally decide to quit therapy. So what’s the matter and why therapy doesn't work for everyone?
Firstly, we need to realise that therapy is not really scientific, even biology is a step beyond. The art of therapy has many different approaches, which differ between each other a lot. Overall, therapy is a quite vague and abstract subject, which is unproven by any scientific research. In this sense, a therapist is not a doctor, but rather an artist and healer. The art of therapy is vague and it requires an inner talent, not just knowing about medications and reading famous therapy books. Truthfully, not everyone can develop this talent, and most therapists are not so competent.
Many people find therapy positive, but it isn't for everyone. One of the reasons for that is that the method which a therapist uses might not fit his client. For instance, talk therapy is quite popular in today’s world, but some clients consider it overwhelming and stressful. People who have childhood trauma might experience sensory overload while they talk about their feelings and at the end of a session feel completely overwhelmed. One of the signs of emotional overload is inability to be present, and many people who attend therapy report on that. Thus, therapy might amplify high emotions too much which causes only harm, not healing. In this situation it might be better to try art therapy or other approaches which don’t require verbal sharing of a traumatic experience.
We may also believe that all therapists want to help their clients, but it is not true. On the therapy market you can meet one of the three types of therapist. The first one is skilled professionals who really want to support you, and this is the tiniest group of all. Also, there are unskilled therapists, who wish to help, but don’t have enough experience and with them you just waste your money. Finally, there are people who just pretend that they are therapists. They use this role to earn money or simply fulfill their ambitions, and this is the most dangerous group.
We all have heard stories of terrible therapists who caused enormous harm to some person, reinforced client’s existing symptoms and actually made people feel worse. In theory, we may never encounter the ''wrong'' therapist. We also hope that we will be able to recognise disturbing signals and end therapy on time. Unfortunately, it’s not as easy as it seems.
A therapist is a person who has many powers over clients, and with these powers he can either help people or hurt them. Therefore, when you pay money for psychological help, you may be misled by the person you are working with. The core goal of therapy is to teach the client to be a therapist for himself. In other words, use knowledge and tools which help you to feel psychologically stable and live a rich, happy life. After a client learns these skills, therapy must be ended.
However, some therapists don't really help with your problems, they simply suggest you go back again and again. These sessions never end, and your problems are never resolved, but you continue therapy because you have hope. It’s a dangerous situation which may end you up in a state that is more damaging than when you started therapy.
Therapy might work, but it depends on many factors: therapist’s skills and intentions, client’s background and problems, therapy approach, and so on. It’s unrealistic to consider therapy as a magic pill which can heal anyone and from everything. Many people have high hopes for therapy, and when these hopes don't come true, these people fall into despair. We should speak more openly about therapy and it’s consequences. We should share not only good experiences, but also bad, and we shouldn’t pretend that this type of healing is working for everyone.