Why Are White Girls So Slutty

Why Are White Girls So Slutty

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Over at the Atlantic ’s Sexes blog, Nanette Fondas asks, “ Is there any way to shield young women from damaging messages about their bodies? ” The impetus behind this evergreen question is a trip that Fondas made to Pink (Victoria’s Secret’s offshoot for teens) to buy a gift card that her adolescent daughter requested as a Christmas present. Fondas nearly has a panic attack when she sees “inappropriate photos” of scantily clad Victoria’s Secret models near the cash register, and she deplores the marketing forces that bombard girls with sexualized images. Later, when her 12-year-old son asks her, “Why do girls want to dress like sluts?” Fondas replies with a rant against pop culture: “Girls see it everywhere: on TV, in stores, magazines, movies, online. That’s why they think it’s the definition of ‘pretty’!” Her son is unconvinced.
I’m unconvinced, too. As someone who was a teenage girl not too long ago, I can’t help but think that Fondas is overlooking a much simpler answer to her son’s question: Teen girls dress like sluts because they’re teenagers, with all the excellent decision-making skills, well-developed impulse control, and exquisite taste that teens are renowned for. Are there cultural factors in play? No doubt (although I’m more concerned about the message sent by Victoria’s Secret models’ lack of body diversity than by the message sent by their sexuality). But let’s not pretend teen girls are just passive victims of nefarious marketing forces. Teens are hard-wired to rebel against authority and to explore their sexuality; it’s a necessary part of growing up. The notion that teen girls wouldn’t ever show off their cleavage if we burned every Victoria’s Secret catalog in the world reminds me of the absurd rationale behind abstinence-only education: If we don’t tell kids about sex, they won’t have any.
Of course, not every teen girl rebels by buying push-up bras and mini-skirts—some of them dye their hair pink and pierce their noses instead (or as well!). But many do, and most of them grow out of it. When I was 13, my wardrobe included quite a few tight, low-cut, and generally tacky items of clothing. I even—and this is very likely the most embarrassing confession I will ever make publicly—once bought a tank top with a glittery Playboy bunny printed on it. Now, in my 20s, I favor shifts and cowl-necked sweater dresses, and I spend a good portion of my free time railing against the patriarchy over drinks with friends. Despite my slutty-dressing teen ways, I turned out mostly OK. And I attribute a good part of my turning out OK to the fact my parents just rolled their eyes at me every time I left the house with my bra peeking out from underneath my shirt, instead of wringing their hands about whether my clothing choices were irreparably damaging.
I can’t help thinking that a much better answer to the question, “Why do girls want to dress like sluts?” is “ What’s so bad about being a slut? ” Girls who play up their sexuality via their clothing choices—and girls who explore their sexuality with more than one partner—are people, too; putting on a tube top does not mean forfeiting one’s dignity. Fondas’ approach, though obviously well-intentioned, plays into the notion that a woman’s appearance is of paramount importance. And I fear her answer to her son’s question conveys the message that it’s OK to pity or disrespect girls who dress a certain way, since, according to her worldview, they’re just helpless dupes. But if we really want to prevent girls from being victimized, perhaps we should teach boys to spend less time judging what girls wear and more time listening to what girls say.
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Sometimes I really feel like I was born in the wrong generation. These days women treat sex like its such a meaningless thing. I recently met a girl that I really liked. She seemed classy, smart, funny, etc. Then she informed me of the fact that she had sex with 26 different guys. She's only 19! I literally felt sick to my stomach when she told me that. This keeps happening more and more to me. I meet a girl who seems classy and mature, then I find out that she's taking home a new guy from the bar every weekend! I'm not religious, and I don't believe in waiting till marriage to have sex, but I do believe in self-restraint and not being a whore, which I feel that everyone else seems to have lost. I'm a pretty much doomed to never find an actual classy woman who doesn't give out sex like its candy at the fair?
Why are women these days such...whores?
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Why do women treat "nice men" like shit and expect to be treated with respect in return?
Why is over sexualized behavior glorified nowadays?
Do you think attention whores have ruined dating for both men/women?
Why do so many women degrade themselves yet still act like they are better than men?
What do you think of women wearing tiny, bra-like tops out in public?
Why do men call women who enjoy sex "sluts" or "whores"?
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I'm don't even care about the double standard - what I'm wondering is why you feel all women should alter their personal desires to suit your or any other man's needs. You don't care about women as individuals, you only care because there are less for you to choose from. This isn't about her being what she wants to be, but about what YOU wanted her to be. It's selfishness pure and simple. If she doesn't meet your standards then move on - it's as simple as that. The choices she made in her life are her business and I don't see why degrading or insulting her is necessary. That speaks more about your respect towards women in general. Her morals are different from yours, doesn't make her good or bad - just different. Also, I don't understand how her sexuality can take away from her classiness, intelligence, or enthusiasm for life. She is still the same person before her confession - the only thing that changed was your perception of her. Fortunately, how you feel about her will not likely affect how she feels about herself - so this complaining is nothing more than spitting in the wind. She's still happy with herself and you are without a classy, intelligent, fun woman. This is the reality you are going to have to live with. Women care less and less about what potential husbands and boyfriends want and more and more about their own desires. Which is what it should be, why live for a future phantom, a figment of imagination when they could please themselves? Women are people who are entitled to live our lives as they see fit. And if a great guy is willing to accept them, great. If not - so be it. I'm not going to pretend women don't lament about being single - but I think more and more women are willing to give up having a relationship to live honestly. Maybe that's why they are single. Which I find admirable - it is more important to be themselves than go against their own desires for a man they never met. I didn't pretend not to like sex in order to land a man (and I landed a great one). Those who let my sexuality overshadow my intelligence, my compassion, my generosity and loyalty weren't men I wanted anyway. It wasn't my loss or theirs - we were merely incompatible. Which is my opinion is what the true double standard is - we have to accept men for what they are but live up to standards they hold for us. I don't disrespect your desire to have a woman who thinks like you, I just wonder what insulting women in general is going to accomplish. There are women out there who share your morals - Utah probably has a lot - so what exactly are you missing out on except for convenience? The moral outrage feels false to me. I think you're more upset about not getting what you want. - a literal buffet of untouched women for you to pick from. Too bad for you. Good luck - check out Utah.
I really don't give a sh*t how things have changed. It's wrong. It wasn't like this back in the day. Where men and women married and remained faithful. It used to be completely common for a husband and wife to be married for 50+ years until death. Nowadays people hop from one marriage to the next like it means nothing and people like you act like its a good thing. No thanks. We should go back to the days when women actually respected themselves. Where men and women had their roles to fill.
You're assuming all marriages that lasted 50+ years were perfect like the Cleavers, but they weren't. There were many people stuck in unhappy marriages because divorce was frowned upon. And where exactly do I state that marriage hopping is a good thing? Some men and women aren't ready to settle down, yet want to indulge in their desires. I'm not condemning your opinions, I simply don't see why all women have fit in your mold to be deemed worthy.
And I am perfectly aware that those are your views - not trying to change them. Just don't see why it's necessary to insult those that don't think like you.
It may be a selfish belief on my part, but its how I feel. Maybe its from my mothers upbringing, but I always felt like women were meant to be held to a higher standard. That their body was something to be cherished and respected, not to be given to just anybody. It's just hard to respect someone who just lets any guy into their vag
Re "You're assuming all marriages that lasted 50+ years were perfect like the Cleavers, but they weren't. There were many people stuck in unhappy marriages because divorce was frowned upon. And where exactly do I state that marriage hopping is a good thing? Some men and women aren't ready to settle down, yet want to indulge in their desires." I think divorce is still frowned upon in publics eyes, but the courts are too loose on just signing the damn divorce papers... contd
But I totally agree with your all your comments... I see it also and I as well as I think a lot of other men are the same way looking for the ladies that are "classy" that don't just "sleep" around, think it's "cool" to have 20, 30, 40 different men. Yup most "strong" marriages always has the ups and downs but couples such as my parents work through their difference. My parents come September bee married 47 years... I am so proud of that... But seems like in todays society particularly women..
Contd... But seems like in todays society particularly a lot of women... Somehow think divorce is somehow "cool" and or just OK and so nonchalantly are like egh just sign the divorce papers and move on to that other guy. Men are serioiusly these days like eww another effin "divorced" lady, something must be wrong with her cause she's another one of "them" divorcees. Divorce is not "cool", it's not OK and sure as H*LL not to be taken lightly.
Contd... I and many other men are disgusted with all these divorces these days. It's disgusting. I have the same view as the commenter as I as well don't care about the waiting till marriage to have sex, live with each other before marriage, that's all fine and acceptable with me but single women that sleep with men night after night, most weekends and have slept with 30, 40, 50 men is appalling and women that are like that should be disgusted with themselves, they should be ashamed...
But it does. This is simply put she will never be married and if you have the same mentality I feel bad for any male that marries you. Here is a news flash she may be an amazing person but if she whored every guy will look at her differently no matter how good looking. If you are already getting the cake why marry? There is absolutely no benefit to the male in marriage. A womens duty is to get a guy to stay and help her raise the kids as guys don't get pregnant. How does she get the guy to stay? Well a big part of that is withholding Sex. Feminism has outgrown what it was intended to do and has corrupted this generations mind and in turn has blindly made women throw away the trump card they had against men. There is no double standard amoung this. Women have there advantages and disadvantages as well as men. Marriage was designed to level the playing field. Go Read The book "Men on Strike" It was written by a women Helen Smith. Get the double standards garbage out of your mind.
This was awesome. If a girl wants to have sex that doesn't mean she's not classy. Being classy is determined by how you carry yourself. You can be classy and be a virgin, and you can be classy and have 100 sexual partners
Men don't have to care about women as individuals. What a crock. You don't dictate to us. I don't got nothing but utter contempt for sluts as they are incapable of love, incapable of fidelity. You're out of your mind telling this man who wants a faithful, loving girl that he missed out by passing her up. Get real. 27 partners by the age of 19? A woman who treats sexual intimacy as a meaningless, recreational sport without bonding feelings is a narcissistic nymphomaniac, a sexual sociopath! She's emotionally and spiritually unfit for a bonding relationship, let alone marriage. A man who gives his heart to a woman with YOUR attitude is a fool. You don’t love your man. I don't believe you for one moment. You have absolutely no respect for men's hearts and the dignity of their masculinity. Only an wuss would get involved with such a woman. I’ll think what I know to be true about her. Sexual promiscuity is the leading indicator of infidelity and divorce. She is useless to love.
Oh have fun today because there is no tomorrow right? Yep! Awesome. Geez. No values, loose morals. Guys and girls should avoid engaging in crazy behavior that will make their future spouse regret being with them or that will make them feel bad because it's something that cannot ever be taken back or changed. Bottom line though, at the end of the day, you have to answer to yourself and any higher power in which you believe so if you can live with being promiscuous and labeled a "whore" that's your (generic "your") decision.
What, people aren't allowed to have preferences about their potential partners? I didn't see anything about how "she should change to suit him."
@siple simonete, This only confirmes his suspicion with your comment. Why do women want be indipendent, it's clear they want. It will pave the way for men wanting the same and a society declines. Men pay taxes for women tot be free, then let them choose where to pay taxes for, in this case he will pay only taxes for his taste. Living in a world made possible for the impossible, is not his world.
Wow, moronic comment if I've ever read one. A slut is a slut is a slut. 27 men by the age of 19... That's unbelievable. Of course, guys are also guilty of promiscuity, but the girl/woman is the one that ultimately gets to say yes or no, and girls should start saying no.
@keepsmiling MY salute to you as well
Personally the second I figure out a girl has slept with one person I lose all interest in anything that would go beyond friends I dont sleep around never have never will I could never imagine 26 guys going down on the girl that I'm about to have sex with thats disgusting what is sex worth to her if she's done it with 26 guys by the age of 19 clearly nothing sex is supposed to be something that only 2 people who are unimaginably close should be doing but now its a complete joke every guy is a dirty player and every girl a cum drenched hoe the 17 girls who likes your comment probably done it with 30 i get the want to have fun but the world has more to offer you than genitals im 19 havn't fucked a single girl been offered plenty of times but I wait because I want it to mean something
Your talking out your arse. Keep your third wave feminism bollocks to yourself. The end of the day yes women have the right to do whatever they want and i have no issue with that. But they don't have the right to not be judged by thier actions. I'm judged by mine everyday. And so should they. If I fucked 26 people by 19 yes as a male by my peers I would be regarded as a stud but I would be ashamed by it. I would feel like a dirty soulless whore because the fact I wantonly fucked so many people with no care. I don't wanna feel that way. And because the original poster wants somebody who respects themselves doesn't make him a bad guy. So don't judge him on your idea of women's liberty. Judge him on his pragmatism and his point is this. "why do women believe thier choices in life are acceptable no matter what they choose merely because they are women?" If you act like a lady you are a lady. If you act like a whore you are a whore.
3rd wave feminist... Waste of space gtfo
@talkinguttershizzle As a woman, I completely agree with your opinion on the matter.
@aamy811 You can be classy and a slut and it's disgusting , I've raised my standards very high. Don't matter what the consequences are.
@nyalalam exactly, things are changing and it's for the good.
@Michael_David I love this. That perfectly explains how I feel... It sickens me what this world has come to. I'm going into college and all I've learned so far is that girls w
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