Whos Getting The Best Head
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Whos Getting The Best Head
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t its finest mankind is a philosopher asking and attempting to answer great questions: “is there a god?”, “what’s the meaning of life?”, “what does it mean to be a good person?”, “do we have free will?”, “is there life after death?”, and “is our universe just a simulation?”. These questions send the greatest minds of every generation to search for answers and understand the very meaning of our existence. But what question ascends above those that have been pondered without answer for centuries? “Whose getting the best head?”. This brilliant question, of course refers to the now infamous image of Alvin and the chipmunks receiving oral sex from their female counterparts (presumably taking place at some point after Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel, the second movie in the franchise, in which the chipmunks meet and court their female counterparts). Their female counterparts are the Chipettes, a girl band of chipmunks consisting of: Jeanette, Brittany, and Eleanor. Alvin is receiving head from Brittany, Simon from Jeanette, and Theodore from Eleanor. Now that we have established the basics of the image we can begin to consider arguments for and against each chipmunk. For the sake clarity it is assumed that any reader has already analyzed the image in question.
The argument in favor of Theodore consists of three points. Firstly, Theodore likely has the smallest penis (evidenced by his low self esteem throughout the franchise). This would allow Eleanor to most easily preform fellatio. Secondly, Eleanor is a large girl, she knows how to eat. Her weight suggests that her mouth is a precision machine, this might give her and advantage in oral sex. Thirdly and finally, it could be argued that Theodore has ascended to a higher state based on the expression on his face and his relaxed posture. If this is true, Theodore has a strong case for best head.
Working against Theodore is a strong point. He is clearly fast asleep. This means one of two things: either the head was so stale that he passed out, or the head is so good and he’s falling asleep from post nut bliss (but then she shouldn’t be sucking). This simple reality calls into question the quality of the head that Theodore is getting.
Alvin is certainly reacting much more strongly than his brothers, this perhaps shows a superior experience. Most blowjobs do not lead men to doing the jumpman. Alvin may be a chipmunk, but he’s not a chump, this isn’t his first rodeo. He’s been shown to be the coolest in his crew and as such has likely gotten some spectacular head in his time. A man of experience reacting as strongly as he is indicates Brittanys potentially fantastic skills.
The quality of Alvin’s experience hinges on the quality of his relationship. Brittany is shown to be the most popular of the Chipettes and thusly May not feel the need to put in the same amount of effort that Eleanor and Jeanette likely are, lack of enthusiasm could be harming her performance. Throughout the movies and source material, Alvin is a dramatic individual who often overreacts to situations creating comedic relief. It is not just possible, but likely, that his over the top reaction is not because he’s getting his soul sucked out, but because he wants to boost the ego of his girl. While this is a valiant effort, blowjobs aren’t theater, they’re honest to god work.
Lastly is Simon. The nerd, the quiet observer, the self proclaimed “smart one”. His geeky status may mean that this is his first sexual experience, and his equally nerdy girlfriend may be for the first time giving head. In the movies, Jeanette is shown to be the most quiet and conservatively dressed of the Chipettes. This prudish lifestyle could be evidence that she won’t get freaky with it.
As always in life, looks can be deceiving. Simon and Jeanette are in a committed relationship. It is cannon that they find love in one another. And the notion that because Jeanette is a nerd she doesn’t give bomb head is foolish. Simon is having an out of body experience while Jeanette slobs on his knob like it’s an acorn. This is not her first time.
In conclusion, Simon is getting the best head. He has no reason to fake a reaction, he isn’t asleep, his girl is putting in effort, and his face says it all. His damn legs are lifting off the couch like the lord is pulling him to heaven. While many of mans great questions must go forever unanswered, “who’s getting the best head?” Can be put to rest.
check out my original argumentative piece it is sure to sway opinions
This is the kind of content I’m on reddit for. People discussing issues of importance with class and dignity.
Read this to all my friends to prove my point thank you sid
great job, i was on team theodore for a while but i switched because of the body expression
I fucking hate everything about this.
Glad I could make your day a little worse
t its finest mankind is a philosopher asking and attempting to answer great questions: “is there a god?”, “what’s the meaning of life?”, “what does it mean to be a good person?”, “do we have free will?”, “is there life after death?”, and “is our universe just a simulation?”. These questions send the greatest minds of every generation to search for answers and understand the very meaning of our existence. But what question ascends above those that have been pondered without answer for centuries? “Whose getting the best head?”. This brilliant question, of course refers to the now infamous image of Alvin and the chipmunks receiving oral sex from their female counterparts (presumably taking place at some point after Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel, the second movie in the franchise, in which the chipmunks meet and court their female counterparts). Their female counterparts are the Chipettes, a girl band of chipmunks consisting of: Jeanette, Brittany, and Eleanor. Alvin is receiving head from Brittany, Simon from Jeanette, and Theodore from Eleanor. Now that we have established the basics of the image we can begin to consider arguments for and against each chipmunk. For the sake clarity it is assumed that any reader has already analyzed the image in question.
The argument in favor of Theodore consists of three points. Firstly, Theodore likely has the smallest penis (evidenced by his low self esteem throughout the franchise). This would allow Eleanor to most easily preform fellatio. Secondly, Eleanor is a large girl, she knows how to eat. Her weight suggests that her mouth is a precision machine, this might give her and advantage in oral sex. Thirdly and finally, it could be argued that Theodore has ascended to a higher state based on the expression on his face and his relaxed posture. If this is true, Theodore has a strong case for best head.
Working against Theodore is a strong point. He is clearly fast asleep. This means one of two things: either the head was so stale that he passed out, or the head is so good and he’s falling asleep from post nut bliss (but then she shouldn’t be sucking). This simple reality calls into question the quality of the head that Theodore is getting.
Alvin is certainly reacting much more strongly than his brothers, this perhaps shows a superior experience. Most blowjobs do not lead men to doing the jumpman. Alvin may be a chipmunk, but he’s not a chump, this isn’t his first rodeo. He’s been shown to be the coolest in his crew and as such has likely gotten some spectacular head in his time. A man of experience reacting as strongly as he is indicates Brittanys potentially fantastic skills.
The quality of Alvin’s experience hinges on the quality of his relationship. Brittany is shown to be the most popular of the Chipettes and thusly May not feel the need to put in the same amount of effort that Eleanor and Jeanette likely are, lack of enthusiasm could be harming her performance. Throughout the movies and source material, Alvin is a dramatic individual who often overreacts to situations creating comedic relief. It is not just possible, but likely, that his over the top reaction is not because he’s getting his soul sucked out, but because he wants to boost the ego of his girl. While this is a valiant effort, blowjobs aren’t theater, they’re honest to god work.
Lastly is Simon. The nerd, the quiet observer, the self proclaimed “smart one”. His geeky status may mean that this is his first sexual experience, and his equally nerdy girlfriend may be for the first time giving head. In the movies, Jeanette is shown to be the most quiet and conservatively dressed of the Chipettes. This prudish lifestyle could be evidence that she won’t get freaky with it.
As always in life, looks can be deceiving. Simon and Jeanette are in a committed relationship. It is cannon that they find love in one another. And the notion that because Jeanette is a nerd she doesn’t give bomb head is foolish. Simon is having an out of body experience while Jeanette slobs on his knob like it’s an acorn. This is not her first time.
In conclusion, Simon is getting the best head. He has no reason to fake a reaction, he isn’t asleep, his girl is putting in effort, and his face says it all. His damn legs are lifting off the couch like the lord is pulling him to heaven. While many of mans great questions must go forever unanswered, “who’s getting the best head?” Can be put to rest.
I’ll give you the best head in your life cummy uwu
Do I have any questions? Unless you are a published theoretical physicist and have earned a Master of Science and two PhDs, have an IQ of 187, and went to college at 11, research String Theory at Caltech, switched disciplines from bosonic string theory to heterotic string theory and reconciled the black hole information paradox using a string network condensate approach, worked on the string theory implications of gamma rays from dark matter annihilations and considered a method for optimizing a 500 GeV particle detector to this end, jointly wrote a paper on supersolids to be presented at an Institute of Experimental Physics topical conference on Bose-Einstein condensates, keep a whiteboard in the living room for scientific theories containing virtual particles in quantum mechanics or series of Riemann zeta functions, then no I will not ask you any questions
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Simon reaches down and grabs Jeanettes head to take control of the situation, you already know hes getting that sloppy head too. Hes also lifting up his legs to get a better angle and leverage even more pressure on jeanettes head. People may try to argue that brittany has more experience, thus giving alvin the superior blowjob, but the fact is that doesn't matter as simon takes matters into his own hands. Literally. Simon really out there making Jeanette choke down his balls. Realest nigga out here.
why the fuck am i reading this 5 minutes after i woke up?
what the fuck has the internet come to?
What does head refers to in this post and which movie /story is it ?
Head is oral sex and this would have to take place during or after Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 (when they meet the Chipettes).
I am a simonist, and this post makes me proud
is there an uncensored version of the image someone please show me it.
If you look carefully, it is obvious that Alvin is not even receiving head, but infact a rimjob!
A survey to see who it really is. send to as many people as you can
[Question] Who's getting the best head? What is the origin?
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Got a meme you need to identify? Ask it here.
I want to know the origin of this meme, specifically who created the artwork and caption for it. I'm trying to write an objective paper on which chipmunk is getting the best head and I think a comment from the artist could be really informative to the project. Any help I could get on this would be seriously appreciated.
https://imgur.com/a/rMB1YnK meme in question. Tried to track down the watermark, but as far as I can tell that is not the original creator of the meme. Also ignore the ending caption, at this point in the research, we can not conclude that Alvin is in-fact getting the best head frfr.
Like all popular things on Reddit, this was stolen from iFunny.co
What the fuck are you talking about
Alvin looks like he is having the time of his life but he tends to be a more hedonistic person, so this is likely average for him which takes away any extraordinary sensations.
I dont agree Theodore is clearly in ecstasy +Based +Racially motivated +Fatphobic +Ratio ?????
Hmm I too am curious to this life long question?
Theodore packs some meat so it’s likely to take up more space and have more surface area touching the inside of her mouth. Alvin looks like he is having the time of his life but he tends to be a more hedonistic person, so this is likely average for him which takes away any extraordinary sensations. Simon is a possible candidate but when you think about it, given how skinny he is, his dick is probably long and skinny, so most of Eleanor’s mount would not even touch the middle most part of his shaft. Theodore, given is girth and his gf’s largest mouth, is likely receiving the best head that anyone will ever receive, and evidently, deserves it for packing so much meat with him and always listening to his homies when they need it the most.
Theodore because if you like closely lady Theodore(I don't know her name) is the most wet suggesting she is enjoying it more. This she would be more enthusiastic and would give a better BJ
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The image is a spin off image of the original which featured the three Chipmunks getting head from the Chipettes, only this time it's the men doing all the work.
The Original who's getting the best head, exploded over the web this past weekend, fueling heated debates and speculation as to who is getting it the best. This image is not nearly as NSFW, so we have included it unedited below, your welcome pervs.
As with the original this image is getting the work over too. People think they know who is enjoying them self the most, though as of now it's pure speculation. You can read one of the theories below, but we would caution you to make up your mind for yourself.
fuck your horoscope, whos getting the best dick pic.twitter.com/QvmmblyMzh
I DONT CARE WHOS GETTING THE BEST DICK I DONT CARE WHOS GETTING THE BEST HEAD, I WANNA KNOW WHOS GETTING THE BEST LOVE AND AFFECTION
whos getting the best dick though? i personally feel like its jeanette because theodore is already cumming and brittany is known to lie and overexxagerate just as much as alvin. also jeanette is dripping to her shirt and simons sweating which means hes trying (so is alvin but ye) pic.twitter.com/IV7K7MdcnV
I just wanna know whos getting the best dick honestly.
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