What Is Tantric

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What Is Tantric

What Is Tantric Massage? 7 Ways To Try It At Home

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What Is Tantric Massage? 7 Ways To Try It At Home


Contributing Sex & Relationships Editor
Kelly Gonsalves is a sex educator, relationship coach, and journalist. She received her journalism degree from Northwestern University, and her writings on sex, relationships, identity, and wellness have appeared at The Cut, Vice, Teen Vogue, Cosmopolitan, and elsewhere.

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What happens during a tantra massage.







For the recipient, being able to receive pleasure without feeling compelled to reciprocate.


For the giver, being willing to provide pleasure without the need of the same in return.


For the giver, learning to read the partner's body language and understanding the importance of touch.


For both, forgetting about time.


Each partner having a strong desire to please the other.


Strong personal hygiene in preparation for the experience.






Get the penis owner relaxed, lying on their back in a comfortable position with their legs apart and knees bent. Remind them to breathe deeply throughout the experience.


Practice breathing in their energy of arousal as you inhale and sending them loving energy as you exhale.


Lubricate and massage the areas of the penis, starting by sliding your hands up their thighs, pubic bone, and perineum.


Gently, slowly massage the testicles. You can pull them slightly, cup them in your hands to fondle them, or use your fingernails gently on them.


Massage the shaft, varying your grip, stroke sequences, and twisting motions. Vary from one hand to two and from slow to fast.


Don't let them climax. Keep them at the edge of orgasm, also known as edging .


If they're comfortable, stimulate their sacred spot, also known as the prostate.


When they're ready, allow your partner to climax with an ejaculation orgasm.






Have the vulva owner lie on their back in a comfortable place with a pillow under their hips, knees up, and feet on the ground.


Guide them in connecting to their breath.


Warm up with a body massage or tantric breast massage (see below) to slowly build arousal.


Move to the vulva and begin stimulating the clitoris, alternating between circling, pushing and pulling, tugging and rolling, tapping, and G-spot massage.


Encourage your partner to practice edging, or to lean in to experience multiple waves of orgasms.






Set the scene with candles, incense, or music that makes your partner feel sexy.


Remind them to focus on their breath, taking long, deep breaths throughout the experience.


Drip some oil at the center of their heart between the breasts, as well as over the belly.


Start by massaging the belly to stir up sexual energy before moving on to the breasts.


Circle the breasts using a feather-like touch, then move to massaging and squeezing them.


Once their body is begging for it, move to the nipples using tracing, pinching, and rolling.


As they come close to orgasm, massage their body up to the neck, head, and scalp. Have them undulate their spine and rock their hips to create arousal throughout the whole body, creating waves of pleasure.






The full-body orgasm


Tantric masturbation


The energy orgasm


Semen retention




Kelly Gonsalves
Contributing Sex & Relationships Editor


Kelly Gonsalves is a multi-certified sex educator and relationship coach helping people figure out how to create dating and sex lives that actually feel good — more open, more...

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Many people fall into the trap of following the same sexual scripts. Sex looks the same every time, usually involving some kissing, maybe some oral, and then a person with a penis thrusting aggressively into a person with a vagina until the former orgasms. Learning to move away from these scripts can unlock whole new realms of pleasure, new types of sensations, and more uniquely connective experiences. One way to throw all the rules out the door is to explore tantric sex and, specifically, tantric massage. Here's what happens during a tantra massage and how to give one to your partner.
Tantric massage is a style of massage or bodywork that draws on the principles of tantra, an ancient spiritual practice originating in Central and Southeast Asia. In most modern-day practice in the West, tantric massage involves massaging and stimulating the full body with particular focus on sensitive areas like the penis and vulva. It's sometimes referred to as simply an erotic massage, although a tantra massage also incorporates breathwork, meditation, and mindfulness elements and is not necessarily sexual. Tantric massage also has a spiritual and energetic component, wherein the practitioner or giver helps move the receiver's energy throughout the body to promote inner healing.
"Unlike other forms of massage, this sacred practice incorporates the tantric essence of shakti, or energy," Tiffany Tanner , a tantra teacher and massage therapist in Arizona, tells mbg . "When skillfully incorporating this universal force into a massage, it can touch the deepest layers and aspects of a human being and be a profound instrument of spiritual and emotional healing."
Tantra stems from ancient Hindu, Buddhist, and Jain traditions, though most tantra taught and practiced in the West can be referred to as neotantra , a modern adaptation that focuses specifically on sacred sexuality as opposed to the other spiritual and religious elements of traditional tantra. "The experience we offer is not intended for the tantric purist," Genevieve Duarte, a tantric massage expert at White Lotus East , says of the tantric massages offered at their New York studio. "If anyone desires to explore and commit to the more traditional teachings of tantra, then this experience can serve as a beginning platform."
What happens during a tantra massage offered at a massage studio or spa center will vary greatly depending on the facility. In general, tantric massage involves massaging and stimulating a person's full body, including genitalia, while doing breathwork, meditation, and other spiritual practices or energy work. Some forms of tantric massage include the yoni massage (focused on the vulva), the lingam massage (focused on the penis), and massaging the sacred spot (aka the prostate).
Tantric massage can also be practiced at home with a partner and can be a way to introduce a slower, more intentional, and more intimate form of sexuality into a couple's sex life.
People can orgasm during a tantra massage, though it's not the goal. Tantric massage is more about leaning into pleasure, releasing energetic blocks and tension, and connecting spiritually with another person. Intercourse is not usually part of a tantra massage, though tantra massage can be incorporated into a tantric sexual experience between a couple.
Before attempting to give a tantric massage, it's helpful to learn a little bit about tantric principles in general, as it'll ensure you're approaching the experience from a perspective of sacred connection and intentional pleasure.
These are the most essential elements of a tantra massage, according to Duarte:
"It's often difficult for someone to express how one wants to be touched and how many people are inept in the way they touch one another," she tells mbg. "Touching someone in a manner that they want to be touched takes time, experience, and open-mindedness."
Below are instructions for specific types of tantra massage. You can do these with a partner or by yourself.
A lingam massage focuses on honoring and pleasuring the penis:
Here's tantric sex educator Psalm Isadora's full guide to lingam massage .
A yoni massage focuses on honoring and pleasuring the vulva:
Here's Psalm Isadora's full guide to yoni massage .
The tantric breast massage or nipple massage simply applies tantra massage principles to the breasts:
Here's Psalm Isadora's full guide to nipple play the tantric way.
Here are a few more techniques to add to a tantra massage or to any tantric sexual practice:
As certified tantra educator and registered nurse Leslie Grace, R.N., tells mbg , tantric sex is as much about the mindset as it is about the physical techniques: "It's about wholeheartedly celebrating the sacredness of our bodies and desires while bringing a quality of mindful awareness to the shared expression of pleasure."

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From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Esoteric traditions of Hinduism and Buddhism
Tantric art. Clockwise from upper left: Vajrayogini (Buddhist), Sri Yantra (Hindu), Chakra illustration, Tibet deity Vajradhara (Holder of the Thunderbolt) in maithuna , Kalachakra Mandala , Dakini .
Elements of Tantrism. Clockwise from upper left: Mantra (Buddhist), Mandala (Hindu), Yantra (of Kali), Skull cup (Kapala), Nadis and Chakras (Tibetan), Deities depicted in sexual union. These are neither compulsory nor universal in Tantrism. [57]


^ The dates in the left column of the table are estimates and contested by scholars.

^ Sures Chandra Banerjee, says [Banerjee, S.C., 1988]: " Tantra is sometimes used to denote governance. Kālidāsa uses the expression prajah tantrayitva (having governed the subjects) in the Abhijñānaśākuntalam (V.5).

^ Also known as Tantrayāna , Mantrayāna , Esoteric Buddhism and the Diamond Vehicle .

^ Tantric texts are also often not being called "Tantras." [20]

^ Compare Joel Andre-Michel Dubois (2013), The Hidden Lives of Brahman , page xvii-xviii, who notes that Adi Shankara provides powerful analogies with the Vedic fire-ritual in his Upanishadic commentaries.



^ Gray (2016) , pp. 1–3.

^ Jump up to: a b c d Barrett 2008 , p. 12

^ Flood (2006) , pp. 9–14.

^ Bisschop 2020 , Chapter 1.

^ Kongtrul 2005 , p. 74.

^ Flood (2006) , p. 7-8.

^ Flood (2006) , pp. 9, 107.

^ Gyatso 2000 , pp. x, 5–7.

^ Gray (2016) , pp. 1–2, 17–19.

^ Jump up to: a b Padoux (2013) , p. 2. "The Hindu worship, the pūjā , for instance, is Tantric in its conception and ritual process, the principles of Hindu temple building and iconography are Tantric, and so on."

^ Flood (2006) , p. 53,73-75,79,81-3,99,132-3,177.

^ Padoux (2013) , p. 1.

^ Jump up to: a b c Lorenzen (2002) , p. 25.

^ Beer 2003 , pp. xi–xiv.

^ Berkson 1986 , pp. 11–12.

^ Fraser-Lu & Stadtner 2015 , p. 59.

^ Jump up to: a b c d e Monier-Williams, Leumann & Cappeller 2002 , p. 436

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^ Padoux (2017) , p. 7.

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^ Jump up to: a b c White (2005) , p. 8984.

^ Jump up to: a b Gray (2016) , pp. 3–4.

^ ऋग्वेद: सूक्तं १०.७१ , Wikisource, "इमे ये नार्वाङ्न परश्चरन्ति न ब्राह्मणासो न सुतेकरासः ।
त एते वाचमभिपद्य पापया सिरी स्तन्त्रं तन्वते अप्रजज्ञयः ॥९॥"

^ Jump up to: a b Urban 2008 , pp. 26–27

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^ Jump up to: a b c d e Banerjee (1988) .

^ Jump up to: a b c Pontillo & Candotti 2014 , pp. 47–48 with footnotes

^ Kangle 1986 , p. 512 with footnote.

^ Jump up to: a b c Joshi 1977 , p. 409

^ Bagchi (1989) , p. 6.

^ Banerjee (1988) , p. 8.

^ Jump up to: a b Joshi (2012) , pp. 48–50.

^ Jump up to: a b Lorenzen (2002) , pp. 31–32.

^ Scharfe 1977 , p. 87 with footnote 50.

^ Jump up to: a b Wallis (2012) , p. 26.

^ Jump up to: a b Banerjee (2002) , p. 34.

^ " Banabhatta , the Sanskrit author of the 7th century, refers, in the Harshacharita to the propitiation of Matrikas by a tantric ascetic." [36]

^ Dyczkowski 1989 , pp. 4–5.

^ Brooks 1990 , pp. 16–17.

^ Jump up to: a b Pontillo & Candotti 2014 , pp. 48–61 with footnotes

^ Pontillo & Candotti 2014 , pp. 89–90 with footnotes

^ Stirling 2006 , p. 7.

^ Jump up to: a b Gray (2016) , pp. 1–2.

^ Jump up to: a b Brown (2002) , pp. 1–2.

^ Brown (2002) , pp. 5–6.

^ Lorea, Carola Erika (25 May 2018). " "I Am Afraid of Telling You This, Lest You'd Be Scared Shitless!": The Myth of Secrecy and the Study of the Esoteric Traditions of Bengal" . Religions . 9 (6): 172. doi : 10.3390/rel9060172 .

^ Jump up to: a b Brown (2002) , p. 6.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , p. 25-26.

^ Campbell, June (2002). Traveller in Space: Gender, Identity, and Tibetan Buddhism . A&C Black. ISBN 9780826457196 .

^ Vallely, Paul (10 February 1999). "I Was A Tantric Sex Slave" . The Independent . Archived from the original on 26 May 2022 . Retrieved 9 July 2021 .

^ "Margot Anand | The World's Leading Expert on Tantra" . Margot Anand . Retrieved 9 July 2021 .

^ Gray (2016) , p. 3.

^ Gray (2016) , pp. 1–5.

^ Gray (2016) , pp. 1–8.

^ Feuerstein 2001 , pp. parts 11501-11505.

^ Flood (2006) , p. 4, 21-22, 172-173.

^ Goudriaan (1981) , pp. 1–8.

^ Brown (2002) , p. 1.

^ Goudriaan (1981) , pp. 1–2, 39–40.

^ Goudriaan (1981) , pp. 1–2, 198–200.

^ Goudriaan (1981) , pp. 2, 7–8.

^ Gray (2016) , pp. 4–5.

^ Padoux (2002) , pp. 18–19.

^ Padoux (2002) , pp. 18–21.

^ "Abhinava – The Trika Shaivism of Kashmir" . Retrieved 9 July 2021 .

^ Jump up to: a b Brown (2002) , pp. 3–4.

^ Samuel & Johnston (2013) , pp. 35–38.

^ Georg, Feurstein (2011). The Bhagavad-Gita, A New Translation . Boston & London: Shambhala. pp. 108–09. ISBN 978-1-59030-893-6 .

^ Jump up to: a b c Werner 1977 , pp. 289–302

^ Jump up to: a b c d Lorenzen (2002) , p. 27.

^ Phillips 2009 , p. 295 with note 23.

^ Deussen 1980 , pp. 301–304, 310–311.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 284–285.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , p. 27-28.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , p. 28.

^ White 2014 , p. 188.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 157–158.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 221.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 283.

^ White (2003) , pp. 28–29.

^ White (2003) , pp. 30, 280.

^ Jump up to: a b Smith 2012 , pp. 363–364

^ Snellgrove 1987 , p. 122.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 131.

^ Piyadassi Thera (ed., trans.) (1999). The Book of Protection: Paritta . Kandy: Buddhist Publication Society .

^ Pranshu Samdarshi (2019), Buddhist Tantra: Methodology and Historiography. SABHI (Students for the Awareness of Buddhist Heritage of India), Delhi, India. [ page needed ]

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 128–129.

^ Jump up to: a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t Gray (2016) .

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 142, 145–146.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 144–145.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 248.

^ Watson 1994 , Chapter 26 Dharani.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 219–220.

^ Osto, Douglas. "Proto–Tantric" Elements in The Gandavyuha sutra. Journal of Religious History Vol. 33, No. 2, June 2009.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 226–227.

^ Jump up to: a b c Brown (2002) , pp. 11–13.

^ Maurizio Taddei (1979), "The Story of the Buddha and the Skull-Tapper, A Note in Gandharan Iconography", Annali, Istituto Orientale di Napoli Roma, Volume 39, Number 3, pages 395-420

^ Lorenzen (2002) , pp. 28–30.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , pp. 28–29.

^ Padoux (2017) , p. 21.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 242.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , p. 30.

^ Jump up to: a b Dyczkowski 1988 , pp. 26–27.

^ Jump up to: a b Samuel (2010) , p. 243.

^ Jump up to: a b Lorenzen 1972 , pp. xii, 1–4

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 246.

^ Jump up to: a b Lorenzen (2002) , pp. 30–31.

^ Davidson (2002) , pp. 202–218.

^ Sanderson (2012–2013) , pp. 4–5, 11, 57.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , p. 31.

^ Lorenzen (2002) , pp. 27–31.

^ Jump up to: a b Flood (1996) , p. 158.

^ Jump up to: a b c Flood (1996) , p. 161.

^ Flood (1996) , pp. 161–162.

^ Olivelle 1992 , pp. 5–9, 17–18.

^ Olivelle 2011 .

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 232–233.

^ Samuel (2010) , pp. 247–249.

^ Samuel (2010) , p. 255.

^ Sanderson, Alexis "Vajrayāna
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