What Anal Sex Feels Like

What Anal Sex Feels Like
By Mallory Creveling Published: Oct 9, 2018
This content is imported from poll. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
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Chances are if you’re ready to turn things around in the bedroom (quite literally), the thought of anal sex has crossed your mind. Even if you’re perfectly happy in missionary , you might be curious to know exactly what it’s like out there (er, back there). You’re certainly not alone in questioning what the heck anal sex feels like—and wondering if it's territory worth exploring.
Well, here's the deal: You'll likely think it's kinda uncomfortable the first time, says Mary Jane Minkin, M.D., clinical professor of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive sciences at Yale School of Medicine.
"The key thing about anal sex is that more guys like it than women like it, to be honest, or at least that’s what I hear from my patients," she says. "It's uncomfortable for a lot of people, and most people will have pain. But make sure you have plenty of lubrication on hand."
Also, if it's excruciating pain—full stop. "I don't want anyone associating sex with something painful," Minkin says. So if the lube isn't working, maybe dial it down or forego the rear sack sesh that night.
That said, anal certainly isn't a drag for all women. In fact, all it takes is scouring Reddit for some solid insight from real women on what anal sex feels like:
“I love it, especially with a larger toy or penis. At first it is very intense, overwhelming, and a bit painful, and I enjoy all of those sensations. Next, I really enjoy the moment where my body decides to accept it. I will pretty much orgasm at that moment, especially when masturbating.
"Then it feels very much like vaginal sex, lots of sensation around the outer ring, some deep-pressure sensations. Then the deep pressure starts to feel just like a G-spot sort of orgasm. It’s great with a partner who can take it slowly through the first part.” — awfullyapt
“If anal sex hurts that much you’re doing it wrong. Yeah, it’s easy to have painful anal sex, but that should be avoided. Lube, lube, lube, warm it up, work your way up from small butt plugs, then ram away. Usually it’s easy to put in a butt plug that’s small enough not to hurt, but big enough to stretch your sphincter a little and get it to relax, then it should be way easier to switch it out.” — Seesyounaked
“The pulling out is the part I enjoy the most! The rest is also pleasurable, in a way that’s similar to PIV sex, as well. But the long strokes when he pulls out is best for me.” — gadgep
“I never would’ve considered butt stuff because I had no idea it could feel good for women, too. It always seemed like it was just painful for women, and for men only the prostate made it worth it. But a bit of light teasing/play totally outside of it felt f*cking awesome, then careful fingering, etc. It took me a long time to work up to the full penetration, but by the time we got that in for the first time, I was SO EXCITED to try it because I’d realized how incredible it feels.” — anonymous
“I’m a girl who LOVES anal, and will even do anal quickies more often than PIV [penis in vagina] ones. So, the key is to use a lot of lube. And when you think you’ve used enough, use MORE.
"In my opinion, the first few attempts at slowly pushing the penis in is a little uncomfortable. Your body has a natural reflex to push things out of there, not suck them in. So I take deep breaths and exhale while he pushes himself inside of me… I really enjoy it. I can orgasm doing it and I have an all-around great time. It feels like what it sounds like; having an object in your ass.” — IAmSexyReptar
“[I] would wager that the majority hate it because it’s painful and uncomfortable; but it’s not degrading. I only do anal for my bf. It honestly gives me no pleasure. It’s five minutes of pain and then the rest is just okay, whatever, fine, uncomfortable.” — purple_urkle_
“I must be in the minority. To me, it feels like reverse pooping and does not feel pleasurable at all. Plus it takes so much to warm up.” — butteryourmuffin69
“I know a lot of people’s opinions boil down to ‘I like it’ or ‘I don’t like it,’ but mine is actually right down the middle. It’s fine. All the emotions feel like regular sex, but then you don’t have all the pleasurable nerve endings that you do in the vagina. It’s kind of a weird feeling for me, but I don’t hate it, especially if my partner is really into it.” — flamants
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Carina Hsieh
Sex & Relationships Editor
Carina Hsieh lives in NYC with her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once called her the Samantha Jones of Tinder • She enjoys hanging out in the candle aisle of TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals.

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There’s no one way to describe anal sex, just like there’s no one way to describe an orgasm , as it feels different for every woman. However, if you’ve ever been curious, seven women get super honest about what anal sex feels like for them.
“Anal sex feels like someone is stimulating every erogenous part of my body. It’s like trying to squeeze out the last of your good moisturizer and getting a satisfying squirt perfect enough to cover your whole face and neck.” — Aliza, 22
“It feels kinda like I have to poop but in a way that feels good. I wish I could find different words, but that’s seriously it.” — Gabrielle, 26
“I love it. It just feels like we’re doing something hot and unexpected, and the sensation of having a penis in there and, like, a finger or vibrator in my vagina is like crazy overstimulation in a good way. You need lots of lube though.” — Sabrina, 28
“Anal was just uncomfortable for me the first time—borderline painful—so honestly, I’ve only done it once. Because I can orgasm vaginally, though I still love my clit touched, I just feel like I have no use for a penis in my butt when it’s not going to get me off.” — Tina, 30
“For me, anal sex feels honestly like I have to poop. It’s totally fine, it just feels so reminiscent of when I’m going to the bathroom that it’s hard for me to totally embrace it, but every now and again I enjoy it.” —Annie, 27
“Once you’re really into it, then it feels like a warm, deep, almost primal sensation. My clitoral orgasms are definitely more intense with anal stimulation.” — Amber, 27
“My girlfriend occasionally penetrates me anally with a strap-on, and it’s always fun for us. It feels like a hot way to mess with dynamics of control.” — Lara, 26

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"PIV sex feels like putting on skinny jeans and anal feels like fucking a water bottle."
Whether you've given anal sex a go before, it might have been something that's passed your mind before. And when it comes to your first anal experience , there are some things you need to know – it’s not the same to vaginal sex and there are plenty of different things about it too. Then there's the emotional side: plenty of people want to try anal sex because it turns them on or they are curious about what it feels like, but others come under pressure to try it through expectations set by porn or partners. Remember, there's nothing wrong with you if you don't fancy doing certain things in bed. However, if *you* want to try anal, then that's great! First up, it's always a solid plan to educate yourself on what to expect first .
Below, 21 men get real about what anal feels like, how anal feels compared to vaginal sex, whether they think anal is better and what they like about anal sex and vaginal sex.
1."[Anal sex] feels grainier if that makes sense. I don't enjoy it as much as vaginal because you also have to prepare a lot for it. It's a much more vulnerable area than the vagina and I can't go as fast or powerful when doing anal. The novelty wore off on me very soon." [via]
2."Hearing a partner moan from anal sex is different than hearing a moan from vaginal and I find it sounds a bit hotter... It's also the act of someone surrendering completely and a dominance thing, for myself. PIV > anal but options are always nice." [via]
3."PIV sex feels like putting on skinny jeans and anal feels like fucking a water bottle." [via]
4."Vaginal is a sensation of tightness across the entire penis, whereas anal is more of a single ring feeling because the sphincter is the tightest point. For me anal feels a little tighter so there's more friction. It's not more enjoyable for me, and most of my friends don't feel like it's more enjoyable either. It's just something that's different and treated in common culture as taboo, which makes it more interesting." [via]
5."I actually think in terms of physical sensations, that the vagina feels better than the anus. The vagina has more texture, is wetter, and in general it feels better. My love of anal is purely psychological. For me, assplay is one more thing I like to incorporate in my sexual toolkit, so to speak. Just one more way to give and receive pleasure from each other." [via]
6."Vaginal is a wet and smooth feeling. Multiple ridges and muscles along the vaginal canal. When in strokes, it feels like a series of tight waves made slick by lube or the person being wet. Anal is a tight push feeling. It feels like a firm solid grip on the penis that only lets up when you sink all the way in." [via]
7."Besides the obvious of the butt being extremely tight, it's almost like a sucking feeling once the penis is a few inches in. So it's like getting a blow job at the same time that you're having sex." [via]
8."I prefer vagina. Anal feels different but not in a good vaginal way. Just different. I can't explain it more than: vagina feels really good wrapped around my dick and anal, well it's OK if that's what she's into." [via]
9."Vaginal is clearly better. No mess (except during menstruation, but whatever). More tight. More responsive. Anal is only fun when the person receiving it enjoys it. But mostly, anal is overrated. At least heterosexual anal sex is." [via]
10."I'm a bigger guy with pretty average junk. I'm bigger though, so my fat can get in the way somewhat. The girls I'm normally with are bigger too, so positions like doggy are almost impossible PIV, but anally, works like a charm." [via]
11."To me, the vagina just feels better, both psychologically and physically. Psychologically, it's much more intimate because she and I can interact much more freely and communicate clearer than doing it anally. Physically, a vagina feels much warmer and wetter. She has full control of how she can squeeze me while I'm in her pussy, and what I feel overall. That's not to say that anal is bad. I don't do anal much because it requires a lot of preparation for us, especially her. However, in the occasions that we do, I absolutely love it. Sure it's not as good physically, but I think this makes me last a bit longer than PIV which my SO likes." [via]
12. "A lot of it is mind-driven for many people, personally I do enjoy the feeling more as well. In addition to the whole taboo part, for me there's also an aspect of feeling trusted. There is some extra portion of intimacy to accept the additional preparation and the vulnerable state it puts the receiving party into." [via]
13. "Vaginal is a wet and smooth feeling. Multiple ridges and muscles along the vaginal canal. When doing in strokes, it feels like a series of tight waves made slick by lube or the girl being wet etc. Anal is a tight push feeling. There is one 1/4" point of a very tight muscle (much tighter than a vagina), it grips you hard and steady until you pass through into the rest of the space in the colon. When doing in strokes, it feels like a firm solid grip on the penis that only lets up when you sink all the way in." [via]
14. "It’s not a preference for it instead of vaginal, it’s just something to throw in every now and then. Why? Because my girl has a beautiful ass. I’m obsessed with it, and to get to fuck it every now and then is a huge turn on. Nothing could replace vaginal sex. Anal is just about occasional variety, and it’s status as being “taboo” makes doing it occasionally really hot." [via]
15. "Vaginal feels like a warm wet hug thats tight all the way through. Anal feels tight round one area then it opens up into warm velvet. Nothing grips the head of a dick like an ass. I will say this; Vaginal feels physically better to me, but anal plays on more than just feeling. It's a major kink of mine so it also plays on my mind a lot. Because of this, I cum harder...a lot harder than I do with vaginal." [via]
16. "Vaginal has more 'pressure', if I go as deep as I can I can feel that I'm pushing against something with the tip of my penis. There are things in the vagina that stimulate different parts, even deep inside where there's more space. Not sure what they are. Maybe the cervix rubbing the side, maybe parts of the vaginal wall, whatever. Because of this I find vaginal sex WAY more pleasurable because it has more stimulation and pressure for me.
"Anal sex feels like one fairly tight ring or tube, maybe one or two inches of tightness, then no real resistance. Anal will kind of feel like it's sucking you in, even past that initial tightness, which is good. But for me, the pressure isn't there as much, particularly for the glans, so anal physically feels less stimulating because of that." [via]
17. "I had a fetish for anal in porn for many years until I got the chance to give it a go. Couldn't get the angles to work very well and despite many attempts with various stages of drunkenness and lube, it seemed to hurt my partner and do absolutely nothing for me." [via]
18. "Anal is an entirely new sensation. It starts out a bit tight, but as you get into it, it relaxes more and loosens a bit. The pressure and sensations can be amazing as the muscles contract and loosen repeatedly. Some of the most intense orgasms I've had have been via anal." [via]
19. "It's a different sensation, and variety keeps things fun. I wouldn't want anal over PIV all the time but its a nice change up sometimes." [via]
20. "As someone who has a partner that likes anal performed on her I can say that there is a difference for me but it's not nearly as unique as it may sound. It's tighter in general than a vagina and the position is different (have to be a little higher or angle higher for me to get it in for instance). And depending on the position, we can also do multiple stimulus (anal/vaginal). It does feel different too since the texture is not like a vagina. It's not a huge reason to desire it over vaginal." [via]
21. "Anal feels tighter, almost suction-like. Initial penetration is also much more exciting as passing the outer sphincter is more intense than inserting into a vagina. Friction is also 'adjustable' with anal depending on the quantity and type of lubrication whereas with vaginal, it's dictated by vaginal lubrication (assuming additional is not needed). Plus there's the social taboo. Anal isn't quite mainstream but it's made great strides in that regard in the last couple decades which adds some mental stimulation too." [via]

This content is imported from poll. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
"It was the most intimate night of my life."
"I enjoyed myself and had a positive experience overall"
"We probably should have used lube."
"It was just something we tried a couple of times out of curiosity."
"It can feel amazing...as long as you use the bathroom first."
"There's nothing fun about it for me."
"It's the perfect balance of dangerous and sexy."
"It really strengthens the connection with your partner."
"I have stronger orgasms during anal."
Mara is a freelance writer and editor specializing in culture, politics, wellness, and the intersection between them, whose print and digital work has appeared in Marie Claire, Women’s Health, Cosmopolitan, Airbnb Mag, Prevention, and more. She’s a Fordham University graduate who also has a degree in Italian Studies, so naturally she’s always daydreaming about focaccia.
Gabrielle Kassel is a New York-based sex and wellness writer and CrossFit Level 1 Trainer. She's become a morning person, tested over 200 vibrators, and worn her vaginal ~essence~ as perfume— all in the name of journalism. In addition to Cosmopolitan, her work has appeared on Well & Good, Health, Shape, Women’s Health, Greatist, and more. In her free time, Gabrielle can be found reading romance novels, bench-pressing, or yep, pole dancing. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter.
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