We Were Sex

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In an effort to save their sex-starved relationship, David and Kate decide to raise the stakes: have sex that night or break up.
In an effort to save their sex-starved relationship, David and Kate decide to raise the stakes: have sex that night or break up.
Brutally realistic and difficult but very well made and acted
David and Kate live together and love one another, but it has been a while since they had sex and they decide they should tonight or, as Kate jokes, break up. They go about their day as normal but it is clear something is not right as the make or break moment approaches.

The title and my description makes it sound like this is all about the act of sex but this is to do the film a disservice because it is much smarter and well rounded than that. The short film sees the couple being intimate with one another but you can tell that it is not really an intimacy of lovers but one of flat-mates with benefits, so there is affection between them but also a strange lack of closeness. It is hard to describe but very clear to see and this is the strength of the film because it shows this stage of a relationship ending really well. It is easier to make a film where relationships end due to dramatics or big events or with quirky humor but here it is just brutal ordinariness that takes it down, and it is hard to watch because of ow honest and real it feels.

The closing sequence of the short is particularly good because it says a lot about David's feelings and how much Kate understands them. We end on Kate and this is appropriate because the film does give us more of her than of David, but both are very well written. The performances are also really good from both Bales and Utt, convincing in all aspects and feeling like a real couple. Callahan's script gives them a lot and his direction is strong as it is simple shots with good color and patience to watch the character; he catches them as together but not together through the day.

The title may suggest something more racy or bawdy but this is a brutally honest and realistic short film that impacts in just how ordinary the subject is. The relationship doesn't go down in flames or end with a bang, but with a gradual realization that both of them know but are at differing stages of accepting. Very well made and very well acted.
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David and Kate’s sex life is on the wane. In an effort to save their relationship, they decide to raise the stakes: have sex that night or break up.
David and Kate’s sex life is on the wane. In an effort to save their relationship, they decide to raise the stakes: have sex that night or break up.
Directed By Michael Callahan
Made In USA
When it comes to break-ups, Hollywood so often gets it wrong. Relationships don’t usually end in bombast—you know, those tearful, melodramatic goodbyes and/or grandiose shouting matches. Rather, more commonly, people just sort of drift away from one another.
As a low-key follow-up to another recent break-up film selection, All’s Fair, (a pensive ying to the latter film’s ostentatious yang), Michael Callahan’s We’re Having Sex is a character piece at its core. Shot in essentially one location and only focusing on two actors, it’s a slow build examination of a relationship that has gotten stale and on the verge of puttering out. There are no bedroom window boom boxes or car crashes or farewells in the rain. This about the love between two people ending, and just how damn unceremonious and uncomfortable that can be.
While that description sounds terribly depressing, it would be a misnomer to classify Callahan’s film as such (at times, it’s actually really funny). Moreover, it just feels “real.” Both characters are likable enough—this isn’t a story of two people moping around and being miserable for 13 minutes. They kibbitz and share similar interests. They still enjoy each other’s company. The sadness only sets in because we see the remnants of a once vibrant relationship that has since disintegrated. Now, our protagonists are more roommates than lovers. They stick together because its comfortable—familiar companions who eat spaghetti dinners on Sunday (Spaghetti Sunday!) and watch reruns of Arrested Development. To put it succinctly, with the film, director Michael Callahan was looking to explore the “undramatic” ways in which many relationships end.
That being said, the film’s climax (both literal and physical)—the payoff when the characters have to follow-through on the film’s central “have sex or break-up” wager—is incredibly emotional and dramatic. Shot in a single long take, it’s an unblinking moment that is a big ole’ mess of depressing awkwardness. It’s uncomfortable to watch, but also quite resonant (major kudos to leads Brandon Bales and Hannah Pearl Utt for pulling it off. They both have chops.). Although the film doesn’t give us a firm conclusion, one the thing is clear: the future of this couple doesn’t look all that bright.
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We Were Sex