Watching Porn
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Watching Porn
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Lesbians are America's top choice when it comes to porn
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3/9/17
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How often do you watch porn? And would you consider that a healthy amount or are you compulsive about it?
Watching porn has become the norm for many who use it to spice things up in the bedroom or while away lonely nights.
But new research suggests that not all porn viewers are the same and, instead, can be split into three groups.
What’s concerning, though, is that only one of those groups is considered healthy.
A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed there are recreational, compulsive and distressed porn viewers.
Recreational viewers account for 75 percent of all participants in the study, watching an average of 24 minutes of porn a week.
This group consisted of mainly women and people in relationships.
It was closely followed by the distressed group, who watched porn for the least amount of time – about 17 minutes per week.
As the name suggests, the distressed group associate their emotional distress with watching X-rated material.
Then there is the compulsive group.
This group may have made up just 11.8 percent of the participants, but watched a staggering 110 minutes of porn per week.
Researchers discovered that men were more likely to fall into this category.
The experts from Université Laval in Quebec who conducted the study said only those who were recreational viewers were healthy porn watchers.
To conduct the study, the researchers asked 830 people to report how often they watched porn, then measured it against how compulsive their porn habits were and their level of distress while viewing porn.
Recreational users reported higher sexual satisfaction and lower sexual compulsiveness, avoidance and dysfunction.
Compulsive users experienced lower sexual satisfaction and dysfunction and higher sexual compulsiveness and avoidance.
Those who were highly distressed but watched porn less were sexually less satisfied and reported less sexual activity and more sexual dysfunction and avoidance.
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The experts concluded that the study “confirms the existence of recreational and compulsive profiles but also demonstrates the existence of an important subgroup of not particularly active, yet highly distressed consumers.”
But while the majority who watch porn appear to be able to do so in a healthy manner, it can be a problem for some.
It is still not classified as a true addiction, but some researchers believe a person can become addicted to watching porn in the same way they can become addicted to drugs and alcohol.
Others argue that there is not enough evidence to support it being treated as an addiction.
What You Should Know Before You Start Watching Porn
Here’s what you need to ask yourself.
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Welcome to Ask a Sex Educator , a weekly series where renowned sex educator Lena Solow will be answering all of your questions about the tough stuff — sexuality, gender, bodies, STDs, pregnancy, consent, pleasure, and more.
Is it OK that I want to watch porn?
Yes! It’s OK that you want to watch! But I want to ask some questions to figure out what may be behind your curiosity and how you can give yourself whatever it is you’re looking for.
First of all: Why are you excited about watching porn? If it’s because you’re curious about what it is or because it sounds exciting, that’s totally fine, and we’ll talk about how to be smart about how you watch it. If, however, what you’re looking for is answers to questions about real-life sex and relationships, porn usually isn’t the best place to go for that. The sex portrayed in most readily available porn really isn’t true to the sex most people have in their lives. For example, maintaining an erection for several hours is nearly impossible. Porn often shows no barriers (like condoms) whereas the majority of people report using barriers during sex. In porn, there’s not usually a discussion between the partners about what they both want — though this is something actors talk about before they shoot together. As writer Tina Horn once told me, "The sex in porn is not a how-to guide for real-life sex, just like driving in The Fast and the Furious is not a guide for real-life driving.”
So if what you want is answers to questions about sex (like how does sex really work or is it supposed to feel good, etc.), I would check out Scarleteen , Planned Parenthood , Sex, Etc , or some of my other columns instead.
Now, even if you’re just curious or want to feel turned on, there are still a few things to think about. Any time you view images, you want to keep in mind what messages those images send you — for example, most fashion models are thin, white, and cisgender, so that can give you an unrealistic idea about what it means to be beautiful.
Similarly, most mainstream porn shows thin, white, hairless, cisgender people having straight sex that doesn't focus on women's pleasure. So make sure to remind yourself that that isn’t actually the only type of person who can experience sex and that truly good sex includes pleasure for everyone and constant conversations and check-ins to ensure everybody is on board. And if you're looking for sex-related content, seek out other images or ideas about what can be sexy — there actually are feminist and queer pornographers who attempt to show more realistic sex with a variety of bodies and genders.
And speaking of those conversations and check-ins, remember that watching porn is a sexual activity, and just like any sexual activity, it requires the consent of anyone taking part. Because so many people have smartphones, videos and images are really easy to access and show to others. You still need to check in and make sure whoever is looking at the images (whether it’s a partner or a friend) really feels OK with seeing them. No one should be pressured to watch.
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Pornography is not a new phenomenon by any stretch of the imagination. It is not some spawn of the internet or byproduct of the digital age. The creation and distribution of sexually explicit material designed to arouse viewers and feed human lust has been in practice for centuries. But is it a sinful? Is consuming any form of pornography considered a sin?
Today, pornography has simply become more ubiquitous and accessible, made readily available to anyone with a smartphone, tablet, or laptop.
But make no mistake. Is it a sin to watch porn? The answer is yes. Watching pornography or having anything to do with the proliferation of pornography is a sin for several reasons.
The word pornography did not become part of the common language until the 19 th century, even though its practice and origin can be traced back to ancient times.
According to the Online Etymology Dictionary , the word “pornography” emerged in the 1840s as a combination of the Greek words, porneia and graphe .
Porneia, when translated, points to fornication, prostitution, adultery, sexual immorality, and other forms of filth and perversion. And we actually see this word used throughout the New Testament.
Graphe is the Greek root for various forms of writing, drawing, or expression.
The word “pornography,” therefore, implies the description or depiction of sexually explicit content designed to sexually arouse the reader or viewer. That is, in essence, the intention behind nearly every form of pornography, both past and present. And thanks to advances in modern technology, explicitly sexual content can be captured through photography and film, preserved in print or other digital media, and shared via the internet. Plentiful. Inexpensive. Accessible. This is the world we are living in when it comes to the proliferation of pornography.
If you’re looking for a specific verse or passage from the Bible that addresses the topic of pornography by name, I have bad news for you: you won’t find one. The term pornography is not specifically mentioned or condemned by name in Scripture, which may be why this question is being asked.
However, the Bible is clear about God’s expectations for His followers, particularly when it comes to personal purity.
To start with, it is nearly impossible to watch pornography without being sexually aroused. That is its intention, but instead of being aroused by the love of a committed spouse, the one watching porn is stimulated by nude photos, suggestive images, or gratuitous video of others having sex.
Pornography removes sex from the context of marriage and uses words, images, and thoughts to feed the desires of the flesh with a false promise of intimacy offered through self-pleasure rather than meaningful, God-honoring relationship. It promotes personal sexuality and instant gratification over relational intimacy and self-control . And in the end, pornography encourages the viewer to desire and objectify others outside of marriage.
I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman. For what is our lot from God above, our heritage from the Almighty on high? Is it not ruin for the wicked, disaster for those who do wrong? Does he not see my ways and count my every step? – Job 31:1-4
While some may argue that watching porn or even taking it a step further through masturbation are not the same as actually having sex, Jesus was adamant that lust should be taken just as seriously as the act of adultery itself.
...but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. – Matthew 5:28
Many people dabble with pornography, assuming it can be a harmless pastime, but there is nothing passive or harmless about sin, even small or casual forms of sins. As Solomon wrote:
...can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?” – Proverbs 6:27-29
God’s instruction regarding sexual sin, even the small, socially acceptable sins, were remarkably straightforward and even extreme at times.
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. – Ephesians 5:3
Watching porn may not seem the same as having actual sex, but why would any follower of God flirt with sexual sin in any form? Not even a hint, Paul writes.
Rather than dabbling with sin, Scripture instructs us to run from it:
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit , who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. – 1 Corinthians 6:18-20
Sexual sin always involves two people. While lust, watching pornography, or masturbation may not directly involve a second person, it is nonetheless a sin against one’s own body, and therefore, involves the spirit of the one who resides within us: the Holy Spirit. That is a sin against God as well as our own bodies.
Jesus taught us to stay vigilant, on guard ( 1 Peter 5:8 ), and always intentional about what we look at or listen to or allow into our bodies, the place where God resides ( 1 Corinthians 3:16 ). Jesus said:
The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness! – Matthew 6:22-23
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. – Proverbs 4:23-25
Sexual temptation can be an incredibly powerful storm to resist, but once hooked on pornography, it can become even more difficult for many to walk away.
Not everyone is addicted to pornography. But the stimulation provided by porn can be just as powerful as most major drugs or addictive substances. It only leaves a craving for more.
God, however, did not leave us defenseless in our fight against temptation. Scripture reminds us:
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not l
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