Vintage Incest Porn
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In Surprised by the Guard, from 1930, a woman doing laundry outside gets interrupted by a soldier with more than clean clothes on his mind.
Video screenshot by Leslie Katz/CNET
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Some are far less chaste than you might expect from porn of yore, and definitely not safe for work.
Leslie Katz leads a team that explores the intersection of tech and culture, plus all manner of awe-inspiring science, from space to AI and archaeology. When she's not smithing words, she's probably playing online word games, tending to her garden or referring to herself in the third person.
If your idea of good porn involves a randy dandy macking on matrons of the local haberdashery, loosen your bow ties and unfasten your corsets. Things are about to get steamy in the drawing room.
For its new Remastered project (warning: link leads to NSFW images), adult streaming-video website Pornhub has, with the help of AI, restored and colorized a series of vintage erotic films, some going back more than 100 years, and posted them online.
"These films show us that human sexuality was alive and well in the early 1900s," Pornhub says.
It's a fascinating romp through erotic history that's by turns charming, funny, artful and eye-opening.
The collection of 20 films spans the late 19th century to the 1940s. Some of the earlier offerings are pretty chaste. For example, in The Undressing, from 1896, a Victorian woman dares to show her naked feet. In The Hairdresser, from 1905, a woman styles her tresses, topless, looking like a classical painting come to life.
But later films are far less restrained than one might expect of ye olde sexy times -- and definitely not safe for (most) work. As early as the 1920s, the films show voyeurism, bondage, spanking and cosplay. There are sex toys, same-sex interludes, threesomes, foursomes and more-somes.
Long before the sexual revolution, it turns out, porn stars in petticoats engaged in a lot of the familiar erotic endeavors you'd see in adult films film today. "People don't often consider the prevalence of erotic films back then, but they were quite the commodity," Pornhub says.
In flagrante delicto, in the last century.
Still, the footage is unmistakably vintage, with jumpy cuts and very little narrative structure. These short films, mostly from France, get straight to business.
In The Horny Haberdashery, from 1921, a male customer is hardly in the door before he drops his neatly pressed trousers to join two female workers engaged in maneuvers that would greatly concern today's HR.
In Surprised by the Guard, from 1930, a French farm girl is doing laundry outside when a soldier suddenly saunters up through the trees. It's immediately clear he's interested in more than having his coat cleaned. So is the next soldier who shows up to, well, enlist.
Adult movies date back to the beginning of motion pictures, when porn films were mostly anonymously produced and known as "stags." The earliest surviving porn movie is believed to be 1896 French film Le Coucher de la Mariée . It stars Louise Willy doing a tame striptease for her new husband as he slyly peeks and giggles from behind a dressing divider. Pornhub includes that early film in its Remastered series, renaming it Bedtime for the Bride.
Almost all stag productions were silent and black and white, even as the film industry adopted sound and color.
"This stylistic device contributed to the films' explicit allure," explains New York's Museum of Sex , "suggesting the reality of the sex acts being performed, as well as the underground and illicit nature of the pornographic film industry itself."
Since standard deep-learning models are trained using safe-for-work images, PornHub turned its AI on its library of 100,000 adult videos and images for a lesson in detecting body parts that take top billing in erotic films. Once the AI had colorized the black-and-white films, the team increased image stabilization, reduced flicker and increased the speed of the film to 60 frames per second. They added audio tracks, like player piano music typical of silent movies, that crescendo in all the right places.
"We thought it was important to not only preserve but modernize these films," Pornhub said. The relics will likely be a turn-on to porn and history buffs alike.
In 1896 French film Le Coucher de la Mariée, which Pornhub renamed Bedtime for the Bride, the groom gets a striptease on his wedding night.
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Oscar noms are in but Joan Crawford is snubbed in Feud trailer
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Published: 13:18 BST, 10 April 2017 | Updated: 16:44 BST, 10 April 2017
Joan Crawford starred in at least two pornographic films before her days in Hollywood according to multiple biographies about the Hollywood star, who herself denied the rumors.
More shocking than her appearances in those films, one of which was aptly titled 'The Casting Couch,' is the identity of the man who tried to sell prints of these stag films.
It was Hal LeSueur who was reportedly twice paid off to stop him from leaking the explicit videos of his sister Lucille, who by that time had changed her name to the star now known as Joan Crawford.
Star with a past: Joan Crawford (above in 1926) starred in multiple stag films prior to her days as a Hollywood star according to multiple biographers
Sibling drama: Twice in her life an individual was paid off to stop them from leaking these porn movies to members of the press, with her brother Hal (above with Joan in the 1930s) believed to be the informant
Among the films Crawford is believed to have been featured in are 'Velvet Lips,' 'The Plumber' and 'She Knows Best.'
David Bret wrote in his biography ' Joan Crawford: Hollywood Martyr ' that the aforementioned 'Casting Couch' not only existed but 'its these might almost be said to mirror what would soon become Billie's own way for achieving recognition - that of the starlet who is so desperate to break into movies that she administers a blow job to the surprised producer before ripping off her clothes and hopping onto the couch in his office.'
Bret also claimed that Hal and Crawford's mother Anna had known about the tapes before she moved out to Los Angeles, and that the actress' furious mother was set to kick her out of the house.
Days later, Crawford was informed she had a contract offer at MGM.
Despite all this, Crawford would end up supporting her mother and brother financially in 1929 after her Hal showed up unannounced at her home and she later sent for her mother.
She grew weary of the two soon after, who she viewed as a financial drain and whose behaviors and morals were not in line with her own she would claim in her latter years.
That is when they began to blackmail her and threaten to sell stories for money, which forced her at times to make payoffs.
One of Hal's payoffs was depicted in the most recent episode of 'Feud,' with Crawford (played by Jessica Lange) being told by gossip columnist Hedda Hopper (played by Judy Davis) that a tape is being offered around for press to view.
Crawford denies the rumor and sends Hooper on her way, but is next seen entering a hotel lobby where she is warmly greeted by the desk manager, whose tone soon turns sardonic.
It is her brother Hal (played by Raymond J. Barry), and the the talk soon grows cold as Crawford accuses him of trying to sell the tape and hands over a check to get him to stop speaking to the press.
She is then on her way, and days later visits him in the hospital with a second check to finish out her payment.
They argue, she yells and hours later Hal is dead
Big brother: On the new episode of 'Feud,' Crawford pays off brother Hal LeSueur after he threatens to leak a tape just days before his death in 1963 (Jessia Lange and Raymond Barry as Crawford and Hall in 'Feud' above)
Big money: Hal is in the hospital when his sister arrived with the second and final check (above)
Strained relationship: After a fight erupts between the two in the hospital (above), Hal dies of a ruptured appendix
This meeting did not happen of course and the timeline is off, but elements of it are based in fact.
Bret wrote in his biography that the threats to leak the tapes came decade prior, first in the 1920s and then again in 1935.
Hal did however pass away in 1963 of a ruptured appendix as seen in the show, and was indeed a hotel desk manager.
Crawford scoffed at the notion that she had ever appeared a pornographic film but did admit of threats to release such a movie in her 1962 memoir 'A Portrait of Joan.'
She wrote in her book that she received a call in 1935 on the first night of her honeymoon with actor Franchot Tone.
Tone was the actress' second husband, and a former paramour of Davis' whose decision to marry Crawford is said to have begun the infamous feud between the two actresses.
The union of Tone and Davis did prove fruitful on he big screen however, and the film they starred in that year, Dangerous, scored Davis he first Oscar.
'Two men said they had in their possession a stag reel in which I danced. They wanted to sell it to me,' wrote Crawford.
The actress wrote that she then alerted Louis Mayer, who was running, who was the head of MGM, and he put the studio's legal team on the case.
J. Robert Rubin, the attorney for Goldwyn Pictures, took a look at the tape and said, according to Crawford: 'If that' Joan Crawford then I'm Greta Garbo.'
Different tales: Crawford's first husband Douglas Fairbanks Jr. (left in 1931) said she told him about the tapes; her second husband Franchot Tone (right in 1938) was on his honeymoon with Crawford when someone threatened to release a tape to the press
Tone had just starred in the film 'Dangerous' with Bette Davis (above) prior to the wedding, and is said to have started the feud between the two actresses as they were both enamored with the French star
'The threats of blackmail which had followed me for so long, ended the minute Mr. Rubin saw that film,' wrote Crawford.
In his biography of the star, Bret also writes that Crawford received the call from blackmailed on her honeymoon in 1935, but tells a far, far different story about what happened next.
And, he claims to have some strong proof to back his story.
'There is an entry in Joan's FBI file stating that as much as $100,000 may have been handed over to this unknown blackmailer at around this time - and that MGM had made a previous payoff, almost certainly to the same man, who some believed to have been Joan’s brother, Hal,' wrote Bret.
He goes on to write however that it is not clear if all those who made threats to release the tape had an actual copy or had just heard of it, and if they even wanted or had demanded money to keep quiet.
Bret does end his story however the same as Crawford did in her memoir.
'The pay-off must have been settled with a stern warning, if not an actual death threat to the perpetrator, for though several Crawford "stag films" are known to still be lurking around in private collections, Joan never had to deal with the matter again,' wrote Bret.
That initial payoff meanwhile that happened years before was the work of Eddie Mannix, the legendary fixer at MGM whose days in Hollywood were loosely retold in the 2016 Cohen brothers film 'Hail, Caeser.'
Response: Crawford (above) denied ever appearing in an indecent film in her 1962 memoir
No more: The threats to release the film came in the late 1920s and again in 1935, with MGM fixer Edd
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