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Paisley Gilmour
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Paisley is sex & relationships editor at Cosmopolitan UK, and covers everything from sex toys, how to masturbate and sex positions, to all things LGBTQ.

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It's a surprisingly common concern among women and people with vulvas.
For women and people with vulvas, getting a wet vagina isn't just a precursor to sex. On the contrary: vaginas lubricate themselves quite regularly, actualy. But, it is true that when you get aroused and start engaging in sexual activity, the Bartholin and Skene glands begin producing more natural lubrication. This is the physiological response to being aroused and is totally normal. It's healthy, and also happens to make sex all the more pleasurable.
We might all know this, sure, but plenty of women and vulva-having people still experience doubts and worries that being "too wet" could be a turnoff for a partner. It’s a super common concern and one 28-year-old woman recently posted to Reddit's best subreddit r/sex with the exact same query, saying, "I’m out of practice sex wise... haven’t been laid in seven years so I’ve been using sex toys and such. I’ve noticed that sometimes I get really really really wet. I’m worried this will be a turn off for my next partner." She asked the people of r/sex if there is ever such a thing as "too wet" and this is what they all said.
It's also very important to note that just because someone is wet, it is by no means an indicator that they want to have sex. As it is just a physiological response, so the body can make it happen if someone is not at all in the mood for having sex. It’s therefore important to note that wetness should not, at all, be taken as a sign of consent .
1. "Hell to the no. Of course everyone has their own likes and dislikes. But if my wife is super wet, that’s a turn on." [via]
2. "No guy should complain about that! If he does, tell him to leave, you don't need that negativity." [via]
3. "As a woman I have a similar issue, and men don't consider this a problem. Quite the opposite in my opinion. But I find it irritating because it reduces the amount I can feel. I usually have to stop halfway through and wipe some of it off." [via]
5. "No. Nothing turns me on more than when I can feel her getting wetter and wetter." [via]
6. "Oh hell no! Almost everyone loves it when it's wet or too wet! Something about touching someone and feeling that they're as turned on as you makes it that much hotter." [via]
7. "Honestly it can't get too wet. Well maybe for cunnilingus but not for sex. No. I've never run into a too wet issue." [via]
8. "Nope. Nada. Not at all. Zero zilch." [via]
9. "I have never had a bad experience with too wet. Plus it is just hot." [via]
10. "The only complaint about being 'too' wet would be that it sometimes reduces friction and makes it hard to finish. Either way it’s not something that you should stress about." [via]
11. "If it gets to the point where there's no longer enough friction, this is easily remedied by having a clean cloth on hand with which to wipe away the excess. As for being a turn-off, only if you get wet to the point of soaking the bed and you didn't take precautions as a couple to, say, put down a pad or several towels or what have you." [via]
12. "I was with a girl that got really wet and squirted . In the beginning of a session I wouldn't be able to feel much because a lack of friction, but on the upside I would be able to last a lot longer and it would prolong the intense pleasure at the end before an orgasm. Whereas with other girls I would be trying not to orgasm the whole time which is kind of annoying and takes me out of the moment." [via]
13. "Only if you're using a condom. You lose a little sensation so sometimes a woman can get so wet you can barely even feel it. Side note for the guys: the best way to deal with this is to literally just go down there and slurp it up and get right back to it. Takes a couple seconds and doesn't feel like an interruption." [via]
Some people may also worry about not getting very wet at all, which is also very common and normal. All sorts of factors affect how wet a vagina gets, from hormones, to medication to stress. That - and because it feels good/makes injury much less likely - is why lube exists. And there should be no shame in using lubricant or asking your doctor for some advice if you're not getting as wet as usual and it's bothering you.

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