Us Your Tits

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“You’re gonna get thrown out, motherfucker.”
Ah, hecklers. They’re a hideous wart on the face of stand-up comedy—but no matter where you go, or how famous you get, there’s always going to be some ill-advised audience member who shouts whatever’s on their mind, to the delight of literally no one. But a good, seasoned comedian will know how to handle and destroy a heckler like this, with the deft skill of a soldier dismantling a ridiculous bomb.
Amy Schumer, one such comedian, proved her defusing skills when she was met with a rather unsavory heckler literally two minutes into her Wednesday night show in Stockholm. She decided to share footage of the show with fans on Thursday, simply tweeting, “I got heckled last night.”
“Show us your tits!” yelled the random heckler at the show, who has clearly been saving that one since he was 12-years-old. Without pause, Schumer immediately stopped her set to address him.
“It’s too good,” she mused. “Everybody point at him.”
The man in question was sitting fairly close to the front, which means he presumably spent a good chunk of change in order to heckle Schumer with all the grace and style of an excitable middle schooler. She engaged him, asking what was written on his shirt. “[I] . . . love pussies?” he replies. (Of course that’s not what was written on his shirt.)
She then asked him what he does for a living. Sales, it turns out.
“Is that going well?” Schumer quipped. “’Cause we’re not buying it.”
“If you yell out again, you’re gonna be yelling, ‘Show your tits!’ to people in the parking lot,” she continued. “’Cause you’re gonna get thrown out, motherfucker.”
After being acquainted with him for roughly one minute, what do you think he decided to do again? “I already miss you,” Schumer sneered as he was escorted out. The video randomly ends with a flash of the #ImWithHer hashtag, a surprise plug for Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton. Campaigning—it can happen anywhere!
Yohana Desta is a staff writer at Vanity Fair.
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