Twink Caught

Twink Caught

wait a minute.. who just got rick rolled?

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This kid is caught mucking around with some girl and is left fully exposed in the hallway when she walks away.

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S.P.

asks from
Aurora, CO

on January 26, 2009

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I have a 13 year old step brother who I love hanging out with. He is a great kid. His mom is my stepmom who I don't have much of a relationship with. This weekend my brother came and helped me move. We were only moving a block away so I let him and another boy who is 12 and learning disabled, ride in the back of the moving truck to the new house. I thought everything was going well. At lunch time my brother and the other boy went to the bathroom together and I thought nothing of it. We were at a resturant. Well after I got home and settled from the day the other boys mom called me and said her son said that my. brother and her son we fondling each other in the back of the truck and in the bath room. She was very upset. I don't know if I should go talk to my little brother aboutthis or if I should talk to his mom. My little brother babysits my kids for me and I knwo until I talk to someone I am very uncomfortable with him doing this.
Of course you need to talk to your dad and step-mom before your step-brother. Dont forget that these 2 boys are minors and you are not your step-brother's guardian. This needs to be handled by his parents directly. They in turn can discuss this with the parents of the other boy. Perhaps tell your dad first since your relationship with him is better. Let him in turn tell your stepmom and they can proceed from there. I can imagine you feel responsible because they were in your car, but you are not his parent. Other discussions about this can take place between you and your step-brother but not the first one and only with your dad and step-mom's permission.
Your other responsibility is to your kids. I can imagine you are wondering if anything like this has happened to them when in your stepbrother's care. As a general rule, I never never never, no matter who it is, leave my kids in the care of a teenage boy. They are just too sexually curious and unfortunately teenage boys brains are wired to act before they think. I have some wonderful nephews but they never babysit my kids - period.
There should absolutely be a discussion with your step-brother about sexual boundaries, especially with children. He needs to be very aware that it is never appropriate to touch a child sexually. His parents should be involved with you and your husband in that conversation and whether he should be allowed to be with your kids unsupervised.
This has got to be heart-wrenching for you - with lots of love and honesty, you will all get through this.
You definately need to speak with your step mother. This is something that shouldn't be ignored.
This is a problem which should not be ignored. Best to have the other lady tell your stepmom, perhaps alongside you, because the stepmom isn't going to want to believe it.
Otherwise, the police might show up (A VERY REAL POSSIBILITY) and the stepmom will find out that you knew and didn't tell her!
Yes, get all the necessary adults involved. I don't think there is any need to be accusatory with him, but it shouldn't be hush-hush.
Do NOT let him watch your kids.
Gay, bi, or straight, 13 is the age where it all begins--kids have sexual relationships at this age.
Unless he is certified to babysit (there are classes at local libraries, etc.) he shouldn't be watching your kids at all.
He needs to know that even if they were "innocently" experimenting, it is innappropriate. He may be a victim of inappropriate sexual behavior himself. Maybe he needs to talk to someone about that, too.
Absolutely tell your step mom. She may or may not believe you, but your duty is to tell her (and your dad). You don't need to get more involved than you are comfortable with. But without a doubt she needs to know.
And do NOT let him babysit for you. It does not mean you don't love him, it just means he is not in a place that deems him able to be alone with other kids.
I know it's scary and upsetting, but this is very serious. The more help your brother can get, the better. And the sooner the better as well.
This is tough because it could be something very innocent or there could be other implications. I can only tell you what I might do in a similar situation. Since you have a good relationship with your step brother, I think you should sit him down and have a serious conversation with him. Talk to him about what he did and try to find out what was going through his mind. Maybe even find out if anyone else has touched him like that before. 13 is a tough age, especially when hormones are flaring and you are learning about your own sexuality.
I don't think you can hide this away from his mother. Instead of going straight to her, make sure your step brother is also involved with this. It won't be easy however, another parent and child are involved and they could bring it up again - and they might not be nice about it.
Here are several possibilities for your step brother's actions. He could be or believe he is gay/bi-sexual. It could be "experimentation", a lot of kids have tried this without meaning any harm. Someone else could have touched him like this and he is expressing this. What happened does not necessarily mean he is a bad person. He needs someone he can talk to and confide in. You might be that person he can turn to.
Yes tell the mom. And stop letting this boy babysit your kids.
Dear S., Protect your children at all cost. I was abused by my father from the time I was a baby till I moved out at 16 yrs. old. No one ever knew. Please don't be as niave as my mother was. It is nice to think the best of everyone but who will get hurt if you do that. I would go as far as to gently probe your children to find out if he has already touched them. I am serious! No one even changes the grand babies diaper but me, other grandma and her mother! I think the statistics are one in every 6 children are molested by a person of trust. Tell his mom, tell him and protect your babies.
Oh S., I sympathize with your position in this. How is your and your step brother's relationship with your dad? Could you talk with him since you don't have a good re
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