Twin Incest

Twin Incest

by Singapore Women's Weekly /

January 26, 2016

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MCI (P) 049/10/2021. Published by SPH Media Limited, Co. Regn. No. 202120748H. Copyright © 2022 SPH Media Limited. All rights reserved.
TRUE STORY: “My husband doesn’t know I share him with my twin sister.”
One woman confesses how and why she let her twin sister ‘marry’ her fiance on her wedding day – and they’re still doing it now!
Growing up, my bff was my sister. We did everything together, from playing with the same toys, to reading the same books and eating the same food. We even had the same friends in school. This might seem strange to some people, but it’s because May* is my twin sister… and they say twins share an affinity.
I have never felt that I needed anyone else in my life other than May. She’s not just a sister and best friend, she’s my confidante whom I can trust all my secrets to. Even when we went to different colleges, our bonds did not break. We might have developed some different friends and priorities then, but we still talked about everything and shared everything… from new interests to gossip in school… and cute boys we liked.
Not long after we both graduated from university and found jobs, May moved out as she found a job at the other end of Singapore. I stayed at home with our parents, but kept in constant contact with May. She would visit us during weekends and we would have lunch together to catch up.
It was during this period that I met and fell in love with Edmund*, a charming expat from London whom I met on one of my work trips. Edmund and I got along so well from the get-go, that we started dating after just a few weeks. And three months into our relationship, he proposed to me!
May met Edmund during one of our family lunches, when she came back to visit the family. I’d told Edmund about my twin sister, but it was still amusing for him to meet another woman who looked exactly like me. And all of us were amused with Edmund as he could not tell us apart – he even walked into the kitchen and placed his hand on May’s back, only to find out that it wasn’t me!
But May took it well and joked that perhaps Edmund should marry the both of us? We laughed it off, but at that time I did not expect that things would really turn out that way…
Because later, during one of my weekly chats with May over the phone she confessed to me that she liked Edmund, and not just as a brother-in-law. She said she had greater feelings beyond that; she revealed that she felt passionate towards him.
Hearing May, I expected to be upset and shocked… but I was not. Somehow I knew May would love Edmund like I did, because we often shared the same passions in the past. Also, May and I had never kept any secrets between us, so I was not surprised that she was so frank with me.
I decided to do the unthinkable, I suggested to May that she could sometimes date Edmund in my place – without his knowledge. He could not tell us apart anyway.
And at our wedding dinner, when I went out to change into my second gown, it was May who returned in the dress, while I stood in the background pretending to be her. We had a huge wedding and many people at the tables had not seen May and I for many years, since we were children, so we were able to get away with it. We never told anybody what we did. I just wanted May to experience the most important day in my life in the same way I did, and I was so happy when I saw that she was in tears of joy when Edmund kissed her.
From then on, May and I have ocassionally “shared” Edmund. Sometimes, she will have dinner with him after work, instead of me. Or they will go shopping, and she pretends to be me. May and I have promised one another to never reveal this to anyone around us.
Sometimes I feel bad about keeping Edmund in the dark, but the charade has gone on for so long, so how do we tell him? Perhaps one day we may have to reveal what we have done. I love Edmund, but I love May even more. And for now, I just want her to be happy.
*Names have been changed to protect privacy.
This story was originally published in the June 2015 issue of Singapore Women’s Weekly.
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In a survey of 796 undergraduates at six New England colleges and universities, 15% of the females and 10% of the males reported some type of sexual experience involving a sibling. Fondling and touching of the genitals were the most common activities in all age categories. One-fourth of the experiences could be described as exploitative either because force was used or because there was a large age disparity between the partners. Reactions to the experiences were equally divided among those who considered them positive and those who considered them negative. Females were more likely than males to have been exploited and feel badly about it. Few participants of either sex ever told anyone. The research finds evidence that such experience may have long-term effects on sexual development. Females who report sibling sexual experiences, both positive and negative, have substantially higher levels of current sexual activity. Their level of sexual self-esteem may also have been affected, but more selectively. Those with positive sibling experiences after age 9 have more sexual self-esteem. However, experiences with much older siblings taking place before age 9 are associated with generally lower levels of self-esteem and no increase in current sexual activity.

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Emily Yoffe, aka Dear Prudence, is online weekly to chat live with readers. An edited transcript of the chat is below. ( Sign up here to get Dear Prudence delivered to your inbox each week. Read Prudie’s Slate columns here . Send questions to Prudence at prudence@slate.com .)
Emily Yoffe: Good afternoon. I hope everyone had a great Christmas. I’m already practicing writing “2015.”
Q. Double Trouble: I have wonderful 11-year-old twin children, “Evan” and “Franny,” a boy and a girl. They’ve had separate rooms since they were 7. In the past few months, I’ve woken up to find them in the same bed and intertwined about a dozen times. I don’t think anything is going on, but they do both sleep in the nude, and my daughter does already have pubic hair. What, if anything, should I do to discourage this? I don’t want them to have negative ideas about sex, but I also don’t want my two kids hooking up!
A: You need to talk about this with them and put a stop to it. It’s one thing for siblings of the opposite gender to bathe together when little, etc. It’s another for two kids who have been sleeping separately to, at the cusp of puberty, spend the night naked in the same bed. You and your spouse need to sit down with the kids and calmly ask what’s going on. Then you need to say that you love that they’re close and comfortable with each other, but they are just too old for sleeping nude together. Explain they’re reaching puberty—and I hope you’ve had some talks with them about the changes puberty brings—and that they need to respect each other’s privacy and set some physical boundaries. You need to keep your eye on this, and if you become concerned they’re exploring sexually with each other, discuss this with a professional.
Q. Don’t Want to Be MIL’s Retirement Plan: My mother-in-law recently told my wife that she has almost nothing saved for retirement and tearfully asked her if she could “still” move in with us when her present husband passes (which could be soon, as he’s not well). I feel like a heel, but I never agreed to my MIL moving in. My wife is an only child, and my MIL made her promise when she was little that they would always live together. I’ve raised my objections to my wife, but she says her mother is helpless and we’re her only option. My MIL is actually quite young—in her early 50s—and in good health but works part time and doesn’t make much money. Is there any way I can prevent this from happening? This definitely isn’t a situation that can be solved by creating a contract stipulating boundaries. My MIL doesn’t have any.
A: Apparently since giving birth to her only child, your mother-in-law’s retirement plan has consisted of being supported by her daughter. But I’m afraid promises extracted from a child who’s under emotional duress are not enforceable. However tenuous your mother-in-law’s hold on independence is, she does work and live apart from you. I hope her “present husband” (nice touch!) has some life insurance. Whatever her husband’s health status, your mother-in-law needs a comprehensive look at her financial situation so she can plan herself for her eventual retirement. Since she’s in her early 50s, she still has quite a way to go and she needs to be maximizing her earnings now in order to reap the greatest Social Security reward when she hits that milestone. You and your wife could offer to help her get some consulting through the National Foundation for Credit Counseling . But you must resist the demands that she move in. If this happens, you are facing possibly living with your mother-in-law for the next three decades. If you said traditional wedding vows
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