Tumblr Female Heartbeat

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The webpage at https://shattered-heartbeats.tumblr.com/ might be temporarily down or it may have moved permanently to a new web address.

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.
Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
Shattered
Anime loving gamer and all around nerd. Of course female cardiophile.
The battle that never truly ends, only subsides for a period of time…
Stress and anxiety are not my friends, however the effects they have on my heart are rather distracting to say the least. Enjoy my skipping beats. Gotta get some enjoyment out of them

So many skipped beats going on unrecorded. Why can’t my heart behave like this when I’m recording her! 😑
Here’s some thumpy beats for everyone!

some forceful beats from my exhausted fast heart as I’m about to

Tri beats and a split that is sometimes there

Already at 110bpm and I’m still setting things up
When you can feel your heartbeat, where does it feel strongest? I see in your posts you mention you have a visible heartbeat. Does it tend to be local or general.
Everything is dark. A cold air fills the room. I am firmly held by tie on a metallic table. I am shivering. I cannot move nor see where I am. A strip keep my head straight and another one just under my rib cage, tighten enough for my breathing to be disturbed.
Suddenly the light turns on the room, and I see myself in a big mirror right upon me, wearing only an long johns. I admit, I am very curious of what will happen next. I hear soft step noises, but I cannot turn the head to see.
A young girl bends down and look at me straight in the eyes. She is lovely, with long dark hairs and a skin of honey colour. Her black eyes are shining with anticipation.
- Don’t be afraid.
Afraid ? I am curious, not afraid. I do not know how I ended up here. I do not know her nor what will happen.
- W…who are…you ? Where…am I ?
I hardly can speak. I don’t feel weak tho. Strange.
She doesn’t answer me. She unties the strip that kept my head straight and I can now see my surroundings. The room is made with bright light green ceramic. Next to me I can see a table with several surgical tools, breathing masks, a silent ECG and some deffibrilators, internal and external.
I put my head straight and I see myself in the mirror. She puts the strip back on my head.
She begins to caress my ribs, push a little bit over my sternum, smiles. She enjoys putting her fingers along my rib cage. She says :
- You are safe with me. Nothing bad can happen to you. I am here.
She places the ECG electrodes on my chest. Soon a soft bip-bip-bip is heard. She looks at the screen and murmurs :
- Such a nice rythm, slow and steady. Your heart is healthy, and strong. You have a nice 56 bpm.
I try to speak, but I simply can’t. She looks at me and with her finger draws a line that goes from my aorta to my carotids, on each side of my windpipe. She presses hard on my arteries. I immediately feel dizzy, I see black and silver stars before my eyes. I breath quicker and my heart speeds up. Bip-bip-bip-bip. At the moment I fall in unconsciousness, she removes her fingers from my neck and says :
- Good, your heart reacts correctly. Your heart rate was of 97 bpm.
I blink a few times to bring back a normal vision, just to see her grabbing a syringe. She palpates my chest left of my sternum, between two ribs. She delicatly puts the needle against my skin, but does not pushes yet.
- I will compress your little heart. It will beat, it will struggle, but at the end, it will stop, in the middle of your chest. And you can’t do anyhing.
She slowly pushes the needle between my ribs. My muscles tense, but the needle finally enters a cavity. I feel exactly where the point is. I feel…a sting deep in my chest. The needle just hit a hard contractile part. I arch on my back, the pain is deep.
- Shhh, you’re safe. It’s all good. Let your heart panic. Look, your heart is beating at 123 bpm. It is not enough. I want more. You want more.
I breath quickly. The needle touches that hard part, not even piercing it, but the pain is intense.
- Here, you feel it ? I am touching your pericardium. In a few minutes, it will be filled and will prevent your heart from beating. But first, I need to stimulate your heart, make it beat faster.
She pushes the needle deeper in my thorax. My heart wildly jumps in my chest, it beats faster, it is irregular. Bip-bip…bipbipbip…bip…bip…bipbipbip. I feel my myocardium being pierced, my heart beating out of control.
- Yes, keep going on. 182 bpm and I haven’t injected the stimulant yet.
She pushes on the piston, emptying the syringe. My heart rushes under the effect of the cold liquid. I hyperventilate. I feel my heart shaking inside my pericardium.
- This is far better, isn’t it ? 236 bpm. Your heart beats four times in one second.
I feel dizzy. My breathing is irregular. I feel the needle being removed from my heart, but not from my pericardium.
- Now, I will compress your heart. Softly compressing it until you pass out. And bring you back, to compress it again.
She lets the needle in my chest and remove the empty cylinder of the syringe. She then takes a bag filled with a clear liquid in it and plugs it to the needle still in my chest. She lifts the bag high and press it. I feel the cold liquid pouring around my heart, squizzing my heart. In the mirror, my eyes widen under the surprise. I feel like a cold hand grabbing my heart. My chest is rising and falling on the rythm of the hyperventilation. Under my sternum, my heart is beating fast.
- 274 bpm. It seems that your little heart won’t give up, right ?
She empties the bag completly. My poor heart, already weak, cannot stand more pressure on the ventricles. I feel my heart shivering, then shaking out of control. I just have time to see her take the defibrillators before going unconscious.
I open the eyes with a jump. I am still tied on the table and can hear the reasuring noise of the electrocardiogram. I try to remember what just happened. Yes…My heart ! I look in the mirror. I can see two red wound on my chest, where the current have passed from the defibrillator to my heart. I notice with surprise that the needle plunged in my heart has been removed.
- Good, you’re awake. The first test was a success. We are going to proceed with the next tests, do you agree ?
- W…wait…
I catch my breath, and say with a murmur :
- What…happened ?
I still have lots of difficulties to speak. She looks at me and lay her finger on my lips. With a caring voice, she explains :
- Your little heart hasn’t tolerated the cardiac tamponad nor the stimulant. I drained your pericardium sac and defibrillated your heart. Your heart is fascinating, I really look forward to hold it in my hands, massaging it, squeezing it…but it will be for later.
- And now ?
She smiles at me and caresses my sternum. She takes a medical mask and lays it on my face. She connects the tube to a gas bottle. She whispers in my ear :
- It will please you. I will test the resilience of your heart at being asphyxiated. You are going to breath some gases. I chose three for you. Carbon dioxyd, helium…and if your heart reacts correctly, maybe you’ll get oxygen.
The ECG accelerates. I know how it will react. I tried before I arrived here. I remember.
- I let you discover the first gas. I can’t wait to see your heart fibrillate !
She opens the first valve. I breath deeply, I fill my lungs with that cold gas. I suffocate at the first puff, and immediatly begin to hyperventilate. My heart hammers against my ribs. Carbon dioxyd ! My breathing is very heavy, I choke. My tachycardic heart feels like a stone in my chest. My thorax rises and falls too fast to be efficient. I see my skin turning pink under the asphyxiant effect of the gas. My muscles are convulsing. I breath in again. My heart skips a beat, then beat faster again. Bibibibibibibi. Tachycardia is regular tho. My heart feels heavy.
- This is very good, breath in again. Breath.
I inhale deeply the gas. The carbon dioxyd is acting on my heart now, I feel it. It stops. Beat again. Skips. I feel my heart palpitate, then a tingling in my chest. My heart fibrillate…
As I was blacking out, a powerful electrical shock shakes my chest. Cool air arrives on my mask. My heart stops beating. She punches me on the sternum and I can feel my myocardium contracting once more. Irregular, but beating. I am saved. My heart fibrillated, then got defibrillated. Bipbipbipbip.
- 162 bpm. This is very good, knowing it is just after a ventricular fibrillation. Breath calmly now.
I inhale. I feel good. I see my chest raising and falling. She keeps caressing my sternum, my chest, my whole rib cage. I inhale again. It makes me feel all funny, my heart beats fast. And very hard. I see it moving under her palm. I inhale again. I do not understand. I inhale…
I open the eyes. Bip-bip-bip. The ECG calmed down. I remember the fibrillation induced by the carbon dioxyd. The defibrillation. Then…Helium ? I felt nothing, except my hammering heart and my heavy breathing.
- I love the feeling of your fibrillating myocard under my fingers. Feeling it ceasing to pump blood in your chest to keep you alive. I want to play with your heart, to squeeze, to pinch, to perce your little heart.
- It was…pleasant…
She smiles, draw a line at the heart location with her finger on my sternum. She kisses the place where she punctured my heart with the syringe. She whispers :
- I revived you three times. Now I will use three ways of resuscitation to stop your little heart. I want to play with this nice breastbone before cracking your chest open.She places her hands on my sternum. She pushes with all her strenght on it. That took my breath away and my breastbone is pushed on eight good centimeters. My ribs crack. My surprised heart skips a beat. My sternum goes up and is pushed again on my heart. Push, relax, push, relax.
- When your atrias contract to fill your ventricles, I press your heart. I don’t want that your ventricles fill. I want them as empty as possible. I want as little blood as possible in your arteries.
Push, relax, push, relax.
In the mirror, I see my thorax being deformated by the pressure. I feel my heart palpitate, trying to resist to that imposed rythm. My ventricles are mercylessly emptied. My heart speeds up to compensate. She knows it. She adapts her rythm to disturb my heart, as much as possible.
Push, relax, push, relax.
Breathing is difficult with as much pressure on my chest. I feel dizzy. My heart is unsteaddy, it palpitates. It beats very hard. In the mirror, my whole body is shaking under the powerful contractions. I can see my apex under her palms.
Push, relax, push, relax.
Finally, after nearly one hour of uninterrupted heart massage, my irregular heart is still beating. She stops compressing my chest and stares me in the eyes :
- I will make that organ fibrillate.
She lifts her fist and powerfully hits my sternum. I moan. She hits me again, my breathing stops. My heart stops. Beats again. She looks at the ECG, slowly lifts her fist. She hits my sternum even harder than before. I stertorously breath. My heart is only shivering now. My pupils widen, my ribs cease to move up and down. She murmurs :
- I feel your heart shaking under my fingers. Your little heart is fibrilatting again.
I lose consciousness. I hardly feel the current going through the chest. Her hands are back on my sternum, not trying to stop my heart this time, but trying to save me, massaging my fibrillating heart. Another shock. I think my heart restarts. I can see again. In the mirror, my skin is a little bit more red.
- Good, you’re back. Time to continue.
She puts a good layer of conducting gel on my thorax and sticks two defibrillator electrodes, one up of my left nipple, the second one on my left flank.
- This heart of yours is resilient. Let’s see how much it can take. We begin slowly, only 150J.
I hear the humming of the defibrillator. I feel the shock. I moan, my heart stops while the current is in my chest, then keep on beating. It beats fast.
- 200J.
I feel my heart making a lot of big jumps in my chest. Now it is irregular and tachycardic. The ECG is panicking. Bi-bibibi-bip-bip-bibi-bip.
- The ECG shows us only a little 181bpm. Let’s try 300J.
She watches my chest rising under the powerful electrical impulse. My heart palpitates, palpitates, palpitates. Another shock. And another.
- That’s it. 500J.
That exctremly powerful shock makes my back arches for at least three seconds. My heart stops, I lay on the table. As I black out, my heart beats again, a single, mighty beat, then keep on beating very fast. I can hear it in my head. Lubdublubdub…lubdublub…lubdubdubdubdub. She shocks me again. Lub…The now familiar tingling in my chest seizes my heart. I lose consciousness.
When I open the eyes, she was looking at me. She says :
- When the heart massage and the defibrillation do not work, we have only one last resort. Do you know what is that last resort ?
I try to say no, to shake the head. I am so weak. I can feel only my heart hammering inside my chest. I see her taking two syringes on the table. She explains :
- Those two products have complementary effects. I begin by injecting you a good dose of atropine. It will keep your heart at a high speed, without slowing it down. Then I will inject you a huge dose of adrenaline. Not only will your heart only speeds up, but it will be beating pretty regulary before sinking in a very pleasant ventricular fibrillation. You enjoy it, isn’t it ?
I see her palpate my chest, then piercing my skin and my intercostal muscles with the first syringe. She stops her move and says :
- It is only a little needle, but what would happen if I stabbed your heart like I would do with a knife ?
She brutally plunges the needles, deep in my left ventricle and empty the content. The deep pain make me aches my back, and that sudden movement makes the stucked needle move in my myocard too. The pain is intense, intimate. My heart is hurt. Physically hurt. She caresses my ribcage, remove the syringe and murmurs :
- Shh, I know, I know, it is painful. Everything is good. Your heart is very reactive to physic stimuli. Look in the mirror. You breath quickly. Heavily. Your little heart already accelerates. I will help it reaching its best rythm.
She takes the other syringe. This time, she slowly push the needle in my chest, gently tickling my pericardium with the needle point before deciding to pierce it and empty the adrenaline in my left ventricle.
- 196 bpm.
My heart jumps in my chest as the stimulant makes effect. She removes the needle and murmurs :
- 198, 205, 222.
I hardly breath. My heart feels like it will explode. I hyperventilate. My ribs rise and lower too fast to be efficient. My whole body shivers with my heart contraction. A thin trickle of blood oozes from the puncture and run down my ribs.
- 240, 254, 276.
She put her hands on my mouth and pinches my nose. I choke. My chest frantically rises and lowers. I try to inhale with all my weak strenghts. She removes her hands and I heavily breath. I am still hyperventilating. My heart is beating extremely fast, I feel only my continuous thundering heartbeats.
- 310 beats per minutes ! Your heart beats five times in one second !
She puts one hand on my sternum and the other at my apex. She murmurs :
- Your little heart is strong, but I think it cannot take more. I feel it. Look in the mirror.
My incredibly fast yet regular heart skip a beat. She smiles. I know why she smiles.
- Your little ventricles are fibrillating. Feel them quivering.
I lose consciousness.
Something is wrong. It’s dark, I can’t see anything. I cannot feel my chest except a gnawing pain along my sternum. My breathing is strange, as if my ribs weren’t raising as usual.
- Everything went perfectly. We can now proceed on the internal part of our tests. You’ll love it, I assure you.
She whitdraws my blindfolds. I am staring in the mirror, surprised to see a medical blanket covering my thorax. She passes her hands on that blanket in the same gesture as when she was caressing my ribs and my sternum. She takes the blanket and take it away.
Fascinated, I contemplate the gaping hole in my chest, my split sternum revealing my beating heart in its white pericardium. It’s so soft, so regular. I could watch it beating for hours.
A metallic sound brings me back to my immediate surrounding. She shows me a little scalpel and says with a big smile :
- Your sternum is cracked open, there is nothing left to protect your vulnerable ventricles. Only a little membrane, a very thin membrane.
She slowly approaches the blade of my heart. In my open thorax, my heart beat under the thin pericardium. The blade poke it, I feel my heart quivering. Then the scalpel enters the pericardic sac and sink into my myocardium with an agonising slowness. I feel a deep, internal pain, my heart irregulary contracting around the invading blade. I breath heavily. She let go the scalpel plunged into my heart and I can see it dancing with every contraction.
- Your little heart keeps beating. It is pretty regular. Let’s see how it can tolerate a twist move from the blade.
She twists the scalpel. It’s burning, I can see my eyes widen with pain and surprise, I breath faster, my heart is panicking. She put the blade out of my heart and then lay a finger on the pericardic hole. My blood pours of the wounded ventricle at every contraction. I feel it flowing around my heart, squeezing it. My heart is more and more irregular, my ventricles are collapsing under the pressure around them. It’s beating weaker now. My vision is fading, my breathing lesser deep. In the mirror, I can see the pericardium being filled with my own blood. My heart…stops.

When I open the eyes, I can see my heart. It is happily beating in my open chest, pale red and pink. Coronary arteries and veins are pulsating at the same rythm. My pericardium retained on each side by a suture, completly exposing my most vital organ. On my ventricle, I see a black suture. The hole in my heart is sealed.
- I love the cardiac tamponnad. How it feels, the sight of your struggling heart, your collapsed ventricles.
She puts her hand in my chest and touches my heart. Surprised, it skips a beat. She caresses my ventricles, tilts my atrias, enjoys the feeling of my heart in her hands. She then slaps my heart. I suffocate, but my heart keeps on beating. She whispers :
- I wasn’t expecting it to not stop.
She smiles and pinches my atrias between her thumb and index. My heart skips some beats, then pauses. It contracts hard, quiver and enters in v-tach. After a little moment of pressure on the atrias, my heart comes back to a more normal rythm.
- I want to open again your suture. But I will keept that for later, don’t worry.
She lets go my atrias. They struggle to find back a synchronised rythm with
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