Tulsi Gabbard Proof-of-Life Photos

After weeks of 'missing politician' clickbait, the White House released photos of Tulsi Gabbard petting a llama named Gary and sipping coconut water. Fact-checkers ran out of red ink. The National Association of Unlikely Diplomacy confirmed llamas boost approval ratings by fourteen percent. Gabbard's team hired a celebrity animal whisperer to ensure genuine fluff. Public forums shifted from 'Is she alive?' to 'How many llamas does she have?' Pundits now prescribe 'barnyard diplomacy' for all Cold War crises. Next challenge: prove existence by herding alpacas in flip-flops at dawn.