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Tube8 Teens Com
Written by Kate Wertheimer & Time Out editors Tuesday 12 July 2022
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Director: Raja Gosnell Cast: Drew Barrymore, Leelee Sobieski, David Arquette Best quote: "I'm not Josie Grossie anymore!" Quintessential teen moment: When Sam finds out that Josie loves him and runs to the baseball field, where she is waiting on the pitcher's mound for her first kiss. Yearbook superlative: Best first kiss with a stadium audience When undercover reporter Josie Geller (Barrymore) is assigned to research teenage culture, she enrolls as a student at her former high school and finds herself reliving her high school insecurities as though she'd never left. But with the help of her brother Rob (Arquette), who enrolls to help her out, she befriends the cool kids, putting herself in a different social hierarchy this time around. Josie is given a second chance at high school and finally falls in love along the way—the twist being that it’s with her English teacher, Sam Coulson (Michael Vartan), who thinks she’s a real high school student. Josie uses her false persona to try to fit in, only to later explain her real story through the article she publishes.— Ramona Saviss
99. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)
Director: Edgar Wright Cast: Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Anna Kendrick Best quote: "I'm in lesbians with you." Quintessential teen moment: In a kinetic final battle fuelled by his newfound “power of self respect” Scott makes up with his friends, kicks his foes’ backsides into the middle of next week and delivers rapid fire quips without breaking stride. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to still be obsessed with video games in their 30s Required reading: Scott Pilgrim vs. the World by Bryan Lee O’Malley Cult British director Edgar Wright’s first foray into big-budget Hollywood filmmaking may not have broken any box office records, but its unique blend of comic book visuals, computer game structure and stoner rock soundtrack combine to form a teenage dream. Based on Bryan Lee O’Malley’s series of six graphic novels, the film follows hapless, perpetual teenager Scott (he’s 23 but has no job, still plays in a struggling band and dates a high schooler – we're claiming him as a teen) as he battles the seven evil exes of mysterious stranger Ramona Flowers (Winstead) in order to win her hand. Progressing through the levels Scott (Cera) must finally leave his infantile ways behind—the journey we all face before we achieve the dubious honor of calling ourselves grownups.— Roman Tagoe
Director: Betty Thomas Cast: Jesse Metcalfe, Brittany Snow, Penn Badgley Best quote: "John Tucker, you know there's only one guy out there for me.. and you are NOT HIM." Quintessential teen moment: When Kate tricks John into donning a frilly thong and climbing into his teacher's hotel room. Yearbook superlative: Least believable "teenage" cast It's John Tucker Must Die ’s amped-up ridiculousness that makes it so watchable. Think the revenge scenes from Mean Girls meets Spice Girls’ girl-power meets reality show Cheaters. Three queen bees from opposing cliques team up with new-kid Kate (Snow) to take down sleaze-ball jock John Tucker (Metcalfe). The plan? Max-strength public humiliation. Add a series of throwback references to classic teen films—from a Bring It On one-liner to the iconic 10 Thing I Hate About You tune "I Want You To Want Me"—and you have a very fun watch.— Kate Lloyd
Director: Paul Brickman Cast: Tom Cruise, Rebecca De Mornay, Joe Pantoliano Best quote: "Sometimes you gotta say, 'What the fuck'." Quintessential teen moment: Cruise slides across his hardwood floors in his underwear, lip synching to Bob Seger. Yearbook superlative: Mostly likely to make VP at Goldman Sachs Or, How I Got Into Princeton by Being a Pimp. No other teen flick of the 1980s devilishly skewers the yuppie consumerism and vainglorious drive of the era while also basking in it. Joel (Cruise) does arm curls and stresses over business school. He bangs a hooker with a heart of gold (De Mornay), which leads to the theft of his parents' valuables. They stage the Best Little Whorehouse in Chicagoland to get the loot back. Throughout it all, crystal eggs and Porsches are laid to waste as Joel realizes his life may not be worth as much. But he also gets to have sex on an inexplicably empty public train. Which, ew.— Brent DiCrescenzo
Director: Nicholas Ray Cast: James Dean, Natalie Wood, Sal Mineo Best quote: "You're tearing me apart!" Quintessential teen moment: Down at the police station, two confused parents confront a seething, drunken mess. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to get in a knife fight Dean's iconic turn remains the key portrait of adolescent dissatisfaction: the upturned collar, the soulful squint, the hands thrust in pockets, the whole package a bundle of nerves. You can see Dean's influence in countless parodies (like Charlie Sheen's magnetic juvie in Ferris Bueller's Day Off ), but also in virtually every teen movie since. Released only a month after Dean's death, Nicholas Ray's 1955 sensation deserves another viewing for everything swirling around its star as well: While the drag races and awkward parental lunges feel a touch dated, they still get at a truth that hasn't dimmed.— Joshua Rothkopf
Director: Lisa Gottlieb Cast: Joyce Hyser, Clayton Rohner, Billy Jacoby Best quote: "Where do you get off having tits?!" Quintessential teen moment: Terry must fend off the advances of precocious sexpot Sandy (Sherilyn Fenn). Yearbook superlative: Most likely to inspire a Katy Perry video Required reading: Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare From an era of body swap comedies, this folly holds up better than its peers. Even the three-decade-old gender politics are not as dated as one might expect. Sure, we're not exactly talking Simone de Beauvoir here, but one could conceivably juice a feminist theory paper out of this '80s pulp. Aspiring journalist (how quaint!) Terry Griffith (Hyser) goes undercover as an eerily Macchio-esque boy for a story. Deviating from the cheap Shakespeare plot for a bit of Austen, Terry makes over a nerd into a hunk (Rohner), falling for him, natch. Sadly, the best character in this flick—Buddy (Jacoby), the horndog little brother living in a den of porno—never got his spin-off.— Brent DiCrescenzo
Director: Robert Bresson Cast: Nadine Nortier, Jean-Claude Guilbert, Marie Cardinal Best quote: "You can count on me. I hate them. I will stand up to all of them." Quintessential teen moment: Riding the bumper cars and flirting with a cute boy, a brief moment of bliss. Yearbook superlative: Least likely to make chorus There has to be room on our list for tragedy—for the sheer hell of being a misunderstood, lonely young person sliding into unfixable trouble. This devastating drama by France's celebrated Robert Bresson is one such tale, about a country girl (Nortier) who sings off-key (heartbreakingly), gets teased by her classmates, squats in the mud and wobbles her way to brutal slaps and sexual exploitation. It's a tough movie but a towering one, a foundational brick in the edifice of compassionate cinema. We are with Mouchette, even if she will never know that.— Joshua Rothkopf
Director: Brian Robbins Cast: James Van Der Beek, Jon Voight, Paul Walker Best quote: "Playing football at West Canaan may have been the opportunity of your lifetime, but I don’t want your life!" Quintessential teen moment: A whipped cream bikini, meant to seduce the new star quarterback, embarrasses everybody involved. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to tell its grandchildren about high school literally every time they visit Nobody wants to peak in high school, but in the football-crazed town of West Canaan, Texas, the local kids know that their teenage years are their best shot at immortality. Taking Dawson out of his Creek and recasting him as the backup quarterback who’s thrust into glory when the starter blows a knee, Varsity Blues is far more sophisticated than the hormonal romp it appears to be. Striking a seriocomic balance somewhere between Porky’s and Friday Night Lights , director Brian Robbins dives into a Twilight Zone world where the parents live vicariously through their sons, where every kindness is transactional and a whipped cream bikini is never just a whipped cream bikini.— David Ehrlich
92. I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)
Director: Jim Gillespie Cast: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ryan Phillippe Best quote: "What are you waiting for, huh? What are you waiting fooooorrr!?" Quintessential teen moment: A teen beauty queen wakes up to find that some sick bastard cut her hair while she was sleeping. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to be murdered while wearing a crop top There comes a time in every teen’s life when they realize that they’re not invincible after all. This epiphany arrives on a different schedule for different people, but I Know What You Did Last Summer convincingly makes the case that running over a hook-wielding maniac is a reliable way of expediting the process. Jim Gillespie’s 1997 horror sensation may have been fast-tracked in order to capitalize on the post-Scream zeitgeist, but it remains iconic because of how palpably it captures that moment when pretty young things begin to learn that actions have consequences. Slasher movies have always relied on such bloodthirsty schadenfreude, but few have ever been so satisfyingly well cast.— David Ehrlich
Director: Tomas Alfredson Cast: Kåre Hedebrant, Lina Leandersson Best quote: "I'm twelve. But I've been twelve for a long time." Quintessential teen moment: Eli saves Oskar from the bullies in the swimming pool – vampire style. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to go steady forever That me-and-you-against-the-world feeling of first love is captured beautifully in Tomas Alfredson’s gorgeously sinister Scandinavian romance. This is a boy meets vampire love story: Oskar (Hedebrant) is a kid in early 1980s Stockholm who sleeps with a hunting knife under his mattress. Picked on at school, he makes friends with the little girl, Eli (Leandersson), who’s moved in next door. She doesn’t feel the icy cold temperature outside—Eli, it turns out, is a vampire. Is Let the Right One In a teen love story? A horror film? Either way, it perfectly captures that ache in your stomach when you met your soulmate at age thirteen.— Cath Clarke
Director: Jonathan Kaplan Cast: Matt Dillon, Michael Eric Kramer Best quote: "I only got one law. A kid who tells on another kid is a dead kid." Quintessential teen moment: The pistol picnic, at once frightening and wistful. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to inspire the video for "Smells Like Teen Spirit" This bitter turn-of-the-80s kids-on-the-rampage movie deserves to be far better known. Dillon is a surly ball of heavy metal frustration as Richie, one of a gang of teenage tearaways stranded in the new American suburbia—a remote prefab housing project where the adults struggle to maintain a semblance of ’50s normality while their kids run wild. The climax, as Richie and his friends tear through their high school during an emergency meeting of the Parent-Teacher Association, strikes a perfect balance between stark social commentary and gleefully destructive rebellion.— Tom Huddleston
Director: Rob Reiner Cast: Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, André the Giant Best quote: "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." Quintessential teen moment: The Man in Black challenges Vizzini to “a battle of wits” for the prize of Princess Buttercup, and Vizzini outsmarts himself to death. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to end up as you wish To think of this enchanting comic fantasy as a teen movie requires considering its charming framing device, in which a kindly grandfather (Peter Falk) reads to his sick preteen grandson (a pre– Wonder Years Fred Savage). Looking at it this way, the inventive, endlessly quotable adventure tale of Westley (Elwes) reuniting with his childhood love Buttercup (Wright), packed with great gags and terrific cameos from the likes of Billy Crystal, Carol Kane and Peter Cook, becomes an instructive, if aspirational, text about the endurance of true love and the power of storytelling.— Kris Vire
88. Welcome to the Dollhouse (1995)
Director: Todd Solondz Cast: Heather Matarazzo, Brendan Sexton III Best quote: "You think you're hot shit, but you're really just cold diarrhea." Quintessential teen moment: When a boy at Dawn's school threatens to rape her at a specifically appointed hour of the day. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to make you feel guilty about being nasty to the weird kid at school Dawn Wiener (Matarazzo) was a sly creation by Todd Solondz—a cringeworthy schoolgirl (actually a pre-teen at eleven-and-a-half when we first meet her, but she still deserves to be here as her awkwardness is pure teen) who urges you to thump her on the arm one minute and feel terribly guilty the next. Dawn is a victim, but she can also be a nightmare—so where should our sympathies lie? Solondz very briefly brought her back for a second film, 2004's Palindromes , and there's talk now of a third, full screen outing for her (perhaps played by Greta Gerwig) two decades on. Which is strange, considering Palindromes started with her funeral.— Dave Calhoun
Director: Greg Mottola Cast: Jesse Eisenberg, Kristen Stewart, Ryan Reynolds Best quote: "I am amazed at how tiny my paycheck is." "We are doing the work of lazy, pathetic morons." Quintessential teen moment: During a house party, James and Em flirt in the pool. As they get out, someone points out how, um, excited James is, and he jumps back in for cover. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to make you (more) weary of corn dogs Summer jobs suck. James (Eisenberg, technically fresh out of college, not high school, making this a teen movie more in spirit than in age requirement) gets one at local amusement park Adventureland, where his bosses are idiots, his coworkers are as bored as he is and his paycheck is less than laughable. Meeting fellow employee Em (Stewart) makes things almost bearable, until James finds out she's screwing the park's skeezy technician. The hidden realities of the job (selling corn dogs that may or may not have gone bad, rigged games) are a nice parallel to the harsh truths of growing up (absentee parents, cheaters, liars, bullies)—but it's a stellar cast playing the silver lining moments—a joke with a friend, a kiss in a pool—that make this movie stand out as a touching study of life during summertime.— Kate Wertheimer
Director: John Landis Cast: John Belushi, Karen Allen, Tom Hulce Best quote: "Toga! Toga! Toga!" Quintessential teen moment: Bluto demonstrates some gross hygiene in the cafeteria: "I'm a zit! Get it?" Yearbook superlative: Most likely to get left back It might not be strictly about teens—fine, some of them are freshmen—but there's no denying the movie's classic embrace of childishness: Animal House is a film that has inspired more rowdy behavior than any picture before or since. John Landis' surprise blockbuster singlehandedly launched the gross-out comedy and its DNA is still with us in every partycentric Superbad and Project X . John Belushi, already a fan favorite on Saturday Night Live , became a box-office fixture (at least for a brief, wonderful while). And the film's unhinged atmosphere is still the one that college-bound rascals hope to encounter.— Joshua Rothkopf
Director: Martha Coolidge Cast: Nicolas Cage, Deborah Foreman, Elizabeth Daily Best quote: "Well fuck you, for sure, like totally!" Quintessential teen moment: When prom king and queen are announced and the curtain pulls back to reveal punk Randy kicking preppie Tommy's ass. Yearbook superlative: Least likely to stay local Before there was Clueless , there was Valley Girl . The original "as if" came from Julie Richman (Foreman), a popular prep who finds herself taken with punk ne'er-do-well Randy (Cage). Her friends are like, so totally horrified when Julie dares to leave the Valley (and her popped-collar boyfriend) and live a little, driving down Hollywood Boulevard, going to rock shows and, ahem, sucking face. The inevitable fight between punkers and preps ensues, Julie's "friends" all act predictably shitty and the happy ending comes with the new couple's escape from prom in a stolen limousine. It may not be the most original script, but Cage is at his most charming here as a bad boy who falls hard.— Kate Wertheimer
Director: Dan Eckman Cast: Donald Glover, D.C. Pierson, Dominic Dierkes Best quote: "Fuck! Yeah, that’s right. I’ve been saying 'fuck.' Going in the backyard and trying it out." Quintessential teen moment: When the three of them talk their way into a "gentlemen’s club" by pretending to be, well, gentlemen. Yearbook superlative: Best attempt at extending a sketch into a feature length film Three 18-year-old inept-yet-enthusiastic Encyclopedia Browns get the opportunity of a lifetime—to redeem their adolescent infatuation with solving mysteries—when they’re given the tall order to solve a double homicide. Donald Glover, D.C. Pierson and Dominic Dierkes star as a trio of exaggerated archetypical kid detectives who’ve remained as wide-eyed, wholesome and utterly clueless as ever in their teenage years. Completely over their heads, the Mystery Team use absurd disguises, insane cover stories and plain old dumb luck to get to the bottom of the crime, and eventually to the realization that maybe they better just grow the fudge up.— Sarah Mulligan
Director: Carl Reiner Cast: Mark Harmon, Kirstie Alley Best quote: "Alcohol kills brain cells. You lose one more and you're a talking monkey." Quintessential teen moment: The gushily sentimental up-with-teacher ending: imagine Dead Poet’s Society in Bermuda shorts. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to breeze through life without making much of an impact, but having a pretty good time anyway. Like its shades-sporting, Hawaiian-shirt-rocking beach bum sports coach hero Shoop (Harmon), Summer School is moderately intelligent and likeably laidback. Neither are likely to win any prizes for originality or excellence, but if all you’re looking for is a no-strings good time, they’ll do the trick. You can pretty much extrapolate the plot from the title: Harmon is hoodwinked into teaching remedial English over the summer vacation, the kids are a multi-ethnic bunch of tearaways, in roughly 90 minutes everyone learns to love to learn and they all live happily ever after.— Tom Huddleston
Director: Hettie Macdonald Cast: Glen Berry, Linda Henry, Meera Syal Best quote: "There's an island in the Mediterranean called Lesbian, and all its inhabitants are dykes." Quintessential teen moment: When Jamie and Ste finally get together when Ste stays over at Jamie's mom's flat. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to make you befriend your neighbor This adaptation of Jonathan Harvey's play is a joyful and funny celebration of emerging sexualities set among the rough and tumble of a South London housing estate. It's striking because the love affair at its heart is between two white working-class teenage boys, Jamie and Ste, who discover each other amid the comic chaos of their respective families and friends. It's a touching and inspiring story, and the abundance of Mama Cass songs gives it a special edge.— Dave Calhoun
80. The Perks of Being A Wallflower (2012)
Director: Stephen Chbosky Cast: Emma Watson, Logan Lerman, Ezra Miller Best quote: "We'll all become somebody's mom or dad. But right now these moments are not stories. This is happening." Quintessential teen moment: Sam gives Charlie a vintage typewriter and his first kiss as a Christmas gift. Yearbook superlative: Most likely to hang out in the corner at parties Required reading: Th
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