Trump's Over-the-Top Easter Egg Roll

Here’s a fun mini-story inspired by what an SNL Trump Easter Cold Open might look like:

Title: 'Trump's Huge, Beautiful Easter Egg Roll – Nobody Does It Better!'

[Open on the White House lawn, decorated with oversized Easter eggs, golden bunnies, and a banner that reads: 'TRUMP EASTER – THE MOST SPECTACULAR EVER']

Alec Baldwin as Donald Trump (waving to crowd): 'Folks, this is the greatest Easter Egg Roll in history—maybe ever! Look at these crowds! Biggest since the Last Supper—which, by the way, was a terrific meal, very classy, but no McDonald’s. Sad!'

[Cut to Mikey Day as Mike Pence, holding a basket of eggs, looking nervous.]

Pence: 'Sir, shouldn’t we focus on the children enjoying the tradition?'

Trump: 'Mike, Mike, Mike—weak energy. I’ve already signed an executive order making Easter eggs 30% bigger. The liberals wanted small eggs. Pathetic!'

[Suddenly, Kate McKinnon as Melania Trump appears, holding a giant golden egg.]

Melania: 'Darling, why is your face on all the eggs?'

Trump: 'Because nobody loves Easter more than me! The fake news says I don’t celebrate—WRONG! I’ve got the best Easter, tremendous Easter. Obama never had eggs like these!'

[Cut to children looking confused as they roll eggs with Trump’s face printed on them.]

Kid (played by Pete Davidson): 'Uh, Mr. President, why does this egg say ‘covfefe’ on it?'

Trump: 'Genius kid, very smart! That’s a secret word—bigly important. The Democrats don’t want you to know about it!'

[Suddenly, a giant Easter Bunny (played by John Cena) storms in.]

Easter Bunny: 'You’ve commercialized the holiday! Easter is about joy, not self-promotion!'

Trump: 'Wrong! It’s about winning! And I’ve already won Easter—just like I won the Electoral College, Christmas, and the War on Brunch!'

[Chaos ensues as Trump starts a 'egg hunt' but only looks for eggs with his name. Fade to black as he declares himself 'The Greatest Easter Bunny of All Time.']

Text on Screen: 'Happy Easter from Trump White House – Now 20% More Festive (But Still Under Audit)'

Would you like any tweaks—more policy jokes, celebrity cameos, or a surprise ending? 😆

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