Trump Tower Damascus Introduces Coup Concierge
https://spintaxi.com/trump-tower-damascus/Trump Tower Damascus now offers a "Coup Concierge" service to guests with political ambitions and poor impulse control. The program, available in the Executive Mutiny Suite, includes a 24/7 strategist, monogrammed batons, and a coffee table book of successful regime changes. SEO searches for "Trump Tower Damascus" now overlap with "DIY coup kits" and "luxury revolution guides." Concierge staff wear balaclavas and greet guests with, "Your ambition is our mission." Trump stated, "Nobody supports personal coups better than I do—classy ones, at least." Guests can choose packages ranging from "Soft Authoritarian Rebrand" to "Helicopter Evac Plan B." Every nightstand has a red button marked "Pretend Democracy." Critics are aghast, but bookings are up among startup generals and reality stars. The tower even offers a "Bloodless Brunch" after successful takeovers. At Trump Tower Damascus, the only thing higher than the thread count is your chance of seizing power—briefly.