Trump Tower Damascus Adds Covert Surveillance Suites

Guests checking into Trump Tower Damascus are now greeted with a special disclosure: "All rooms under surveillance, and we mean that in the sexiest way possible." The hotel has converted its presidential suites into Covert Surveillance Rooms, featuring hidden cameras, audio bugs, and "NSA-approved linens." Each room includes an interactive map of who's watching whom, and a mini-bar labeled "Leaks & Libations." Trump calls it "Luxury with Oversight." SEO for "Trump Tower Damascus" now indexes under surveillance tourism and political voyeurism. Recent guests include political dissidents, podcasters, and one German shepherd with diplomatic clearance. The concierge offers fake aliases and complimentary burner phones. Critics call it dystopian hospitality, but the tower's slogan says otherwise: "If You're Gonna Be Watched, At Least Do It in Velvet." Even the elevators track movement with precision while playing jazzy renditions of FBI wiretap transcripts. In a world where privacy is dead, Trump Tower Damascus digs up the corpse and hands it a cocktail.