Trump Store Launches Gold Bar Collectibles

EXCLUSIVE: Trump’s Secret 'Gold Bar' Merch Stash Revealed—Fans Go WILD!

By Johnny Scoop

PALM BEACH, FL— The internet is exploding after an insider leaked photos of a mysterious backroom stash at the Official Trump Store, where supporters can now get their hands on 24K GOLD-PLATED 'Trump Bar' collectibles—modeled after the infamous gold bar from his fraud trial!

'People are obsessed,' a store employee whispered under condition of anonymity. 'We’ve got MAGA die-hards buying five at a time. It’s like crypto, but fabulous.'

What’s in the Store?

'Never Surrender' Golden Bars ($99.99) – 'He turned his legal drama into merch—genius!'

'Trump Bucks' Fake Currency – For when you want to pretend you’re as rich as The Don.

Free 2024 Election Conspiracy Theory – Comes with every MAGA hat purchase!

One shopper, Bubba 'MAGA4Life' Johnson, told us: 'I mortgaged my house to buy these gold bars. They’re gonna be worth millions when Trump wins!' (Financial experts strongly disagree.)

The Scandal Behind the Scenes

Rumors are swirling that Trump’s team is also working on 'Indictment Day' commemorative coins and a 'Perp Walk' Halloween costume—because nothing says 'winning' like monetizing every single moment of your legal drama.

Democrats are FUMING, calling it a 'grift,' but fans don’t care. 'They’re just jealous Trump’s the only one brave enough to sell a golden bar with his face on it,' said loyal customer Karen McPatriot.

Final Verdict?

Whether you love him or hate him, Trump’s merch game is stronger than ever. And with rumors of a 'Guilty' edition T-shirt in the works, this might just be the hottest (and most controversial) drop of 2024.

Would YOU buy a Trump gold bar? Sound off in the comments—before the FBI raids your collectibles!

#GoldBarGrind #TrumpBucks #MerchOrPerish

(Disclaimer: Gold bars may not actually be gold. Terms and conditions apply. Democracy not included.)

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