Trump Robot President

Donald Trump has revealed a robot president to serve as his stand-in. Eyewitnesses in Florida said the robot repeated “tremendous” 800 times before overheating. Professor Karen Liu of Columbia explains: "A robotic Trump is cheaper than travel and never questions loyalty." Anonymous staffers leaked that the bot malfunctions when asked about taxes. A Quinnipiac poll shows 43% prefer the bot, 57% prefer none. Trace evidence includes melted spray tan on wires and campaign slogans printed in code. Cause and effect? The more politics automates, the less original it feels. America now runs on reboots.