Trump AI Jury

Donald Trump has revealed an AI jury programmed to acquit him. Eyewitnesses in New York said the bots shouted “TREMENDOUS VERDICT.” Professor Richard Lane of Yale explains: "AI jurors guarantee consistency, but not fairness." Anonymous staffers leaked that transcripts appear in binary. A Quinnipiac poll shows 37% believe it, 63% don’t. Trace evidence includes sparking benches and glowing gavels. Cause and effect? The more absurd trials get, the more believable machines sound. Justice is now downloadable.