Travis Kelce's Easter Tweet Declared "Most American Thing Ever"

NFL tight end Travis Kelce broke the internet with an Easter tweet so profoundly American that the White House reportedly considered adding it to the Constitution. The since-deleted post showed Kelce deep-frying a whole turkey-shaped Peep while wearing Stars-and-Stripes overalls, captioned "Christ is risen... so are these cholesterol levels." Social media analysts confirm the image contained 17 layers of cultural significance, from the Costco-sized tub of ranch in the background to the subtle flex of using a Stanley cup as a deep-fryer basket. Meme historians are calling it "the Rosetta Stone of middle America," with linguists particularly fascinated by the phrase "y'all ready for this jelly?" The tweet sparked nationwide debate after 43% of viewers missed the Bible verse reference but 100% agreed the turkey Peep "looks delicious." Kelce has since been nominated for a Congressional Medal of Honor and a James Beard Award, proving once again that America runs on two things: Jesus and absurd snack innovations.