Tiny Asses
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Home » Horror News » HORROR TEN SPOT: Top 10 Asses
The main question with a list like this is simple yet surprisingly complex – what makes a great ass? Curve, amplitude, where the cleft lies are all important considerations. But there’s also how a woman works it to keep in mind. Plus the indefinable qualities that take some subpar booty’s and lift them above the fray.
You may have figured by this point that I’m a big fan of the back cleavage. Which means I know there’s to be no agreement on a list like this. So have fun with it, spit bullets on the butts you think I must be blind to have left off, and don’t forget if you’re checking this out at work to CYA!!
Damn you Devon Sawa, and getting to grab onto probably the most delectable piece of backside real estate this side of Vida Guerra. I watch this scene and my reaction is something along the lines of “Gah, gah, gah, blippidy ya, ya, ahhhhhh.” I mean the girl’s rocking a perfect hypnotic instrument right at the base of her spine. I can’t take my eyes away. Gimme more! I guess while I’m at it I should also say damn you to James Cameron for giving her enough heat through DARK ANGEL that she’s never had to give into the pressure to get naked. What an evil man.
Lopez, Lopez, Lopez. Oh how your bountiful backside has haunted my dreams. It’s just acres of smooth, hot deliciousness. And what I dig about her butt in this flick is that even though we’re going for a more serious approach to horror, they still throw us a bone by having her do work in high cut panties and a nice tight shirt. I’m not saying that most professionals aren’t doing their casework like that. I’m just saying thank you to the filmmakers for capturing that moment of realism for us.
I share StepPapa JoBlo’s obsession with this Latino goddess. And if you want the best example of why that is then watch DESPERADO. But in terms of horror, not much can beat the heat of Salma as a vampire queen doing her pre-mass feeding striptease. It’s like somebody packed a keg of dynamite and Jagermeister into a little 5’2″ package.
Our dear Ms. Shepis has been more than kind in showing us her particularly fine backside over the years. Picking out just one example is like trying to pick out the best Lindt Truffle. Ultimately they’re all great. What I like about ETD 3 though, is that Tiffany (billed as Vanessa Lynch) really gets to let her ample sensuality play because the film is more about sex than it is about horror. And her sexy is a powerhouse. Nowhere is that more evident than in this flick
CUTTING CLASS, featuring an as yet unknown Brad Pitt, was a great movie for checking out Jill Schoelen’s bum in a variety of amusingly exploitive ways. That said, it’s hard to top THE STEPFATHER in terms of sheer naked awesomeness for her. Both the situation and the context is choice for us voyeur types. Not one of the better known scream queens overall, but certainly a significant player in any best body collection.
For reasons that should be obvious from the opening pic, I love Crystal Lowe’s assets. But even more, I love this look from WT2. I mean what more perfect horror scenario than a hot chick on the beach while an inbred hillbilly comes flying out to get’er? On top of that, the woman in question is a nice genetic mix of Asian and Caucasian leading to clean angular beauty and a significant booty.
I may not understand her choice in men, but it’s easy to see what draws dudes to Hudson. It’s tough to be as thin as she is and have anything going on ’round back. Often times the skinny chicks have pretty droopy butts because you need muscle and fat to make that area sing. Certainly not Sir-Mix-Alot territory here, but any ass man worth his badge is gonna be psyched to get his hands on this specimen.
Even though I liked the TCM remake, I wasn’t at all excited to go back for this prequel. Until they dropped this pic of Jordana Brewster on us. Tight jeans? Check. Imminent jeopardy? Check. High likelihood of crack escapage? Check. Round, lovely and crawling for your life is a perfectly acceptable way for a lass to go in horror land.
I’m not a huge fan of lithely put together babes, but Maggie Grace gets a lot of credit for making even one scene from THE FOG remake worth watching. Something about watching a lady in underwear with a smallish shirt on hits an archetypal need, even when the butt isn’t top shelf. Fortunately in this case, it is.
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A post shared by Chivette Official (@chivetteofficial) on Mar 18, 2018 at 7:52pm PDT
Negative, I love women's asses just as much as you
gok attack? what the fuck is that? and you are calling us homos? queer!
My Ass is Cute and Sexy than all these Ugly Ass
I'm gunna be sittin at my desk for a while.
Thank you even more Chive if we can get a name or more from #5!
I love a great ass, and this post is FULL of them
Women are so lovely to look at. I'd love to wake up to #6
#22 This women would beat the fuck out of just about every one of you nerd herders
'cept that shes only 5'5". jaime keoppe
And you consider that a "bad thing"?
She can spank me and call me a "bad boy" anyday
super ass i ever see dear super i want click it.
Ho Ho
so great , i will play my hand look you
Fucking SHOPPED… I mean stop with editing!!! #16 and #3 i'm calling BULLSHIT!!!
Still no Kari Sweets…the hottest ass (and face) evar! Just look up 'Taste the Rainbow'
I love Wednesday's ass post…how about a 'Front Butt' day?
Just Googled Kari Sweets & was not impressed. Not mush on an ass to be showing off. OK face but not a 10 by any means!
chive i'll have your babies if you find #3….shopped or not!
That's just Tiffany Teen, internet mistress from yesteryear. But you can have your own babies.[youtube UGIB4noKMGs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGIB4noKMGs youtube]
#14 is glorious! And to think some lucky bastard out in the world has had that.
Just remember, for every great looking woman out there, there is at least one guy who is 'sick of her shit'…as the saying goes.
(doesn't mean I wouldn't tap that…)
SO TRUE! you can be a bitch or dumb as long as you're hot enough, but NO ONE is hot enough to be dumb or a bitch forever and still keep a guy.
(and the smart ones are bitches, while the dumb ones are worthless)
She's an escort in Scotland. A LOT of lucky (or wealthy) bastards have had that.
I know who this is, and have had it myself. She's an escort.
I like it too much ,, i wanna such it
I know right!? The Chive actually posted a girl who has an ass instead of the usual pancake ass they post.
You mean greatest ass you have never seen.. that photo is shopped to hell.
Chive – Thank you for making 'Hump Day' a recurring post!!
Overly big boobs, now overly big butts. At least your tastes are consistent.
your gayness might infect others…keep up the good work, Chive!
So you'd like flat chested women with no ass?…. hand in your man card
of course they need to have a plum ass that way we don't bruise our hips while watching the game
"Biggest" is not always "sexiest." Miranda Kerr's ass is quite tiny but it is also one of the sexiest body parts currently residing on this planet. Hell for that matter Jessica Alba doesn't have a great big ass but nobody denies her attractiveness.
#14 is SWEET! #16 looks shopped too. I mean is she really THAT thin? #17-26 are smokin'! Yeah, gonna be at my desk for a while too.
Every time I look at the humpday posts, I can't get Sir-Mix-A-Lot out of my head!
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By Zach Seemayer
10:57 PM PST, February 6, 2018
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Kelly Ripa is showing off her seriously ripped physique!
The Live with Kelly and Ryan host was spotted walking on the beach in the Bahamas outside the Atlantis resort on Tuesday. Ripa and her Live co-star, Ryan Seacrest, are in the idyllic paradise to film their daytime talk show.
All smiles as she strolled along the sand, Ripa flaunted her flawless figure in an itty-bitty black bikini that showed off her toned legs and torso. She protected her face from the sun under a wide-brimmed white hat and matching black sunglasses.
The 47-year-old talk show host has really been enjoying her time at the luxury resort, sharing a slew of snapshots from the fun getaway, including her fun paddleboat ride and paddle boarding adventures with Seacrest.
Ripa also made sure to bring along her dad, Joe Ripa, to enjoy the tropical excursion with her.
Seacrest joined Live in May following the departure of former co-host Michael Strahan and a lengthy subsequent search for a permanent replacement. In October, ET caught up with the pair where they reflected on their on-screen chemistry after several months of working together.
"I get excited. I'm actually, genuinely excited to see her every morning," Seacrest revealed.
"Ryan is exactly who he is, off-camera and on -- sincere and genuine and authentic with every person," Ripa added. Check out the video below to hear more.
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